it's always been something I've wanted to know I think for me I've got great supportive family and all of my siblings are adopted and it's something that we've been very much aware of growing up and growing up I you know I've got glossip on my passport which I've never been to glossip but why have I got glossip on my passport and when you go to Medical professions they always say have you got any medical history which I can't answer that and also when you're young as well for me I love the story of I think again that similarity she was looking for her birth mom and she had ideas of who she was and I've had all these questions that I've W answering but when I was an athlete I was so focused and I didn't want any distractions cuz I've heard in the past it's it's a very emotional journey and I knew that and I didn't want for me when I was an athlete to to be known as Ellie Simmons the adop like I just wanted to focus on swimming and my Sport and let the sport do the talking but then when once I retired I thought this is my time to do it and also having the opportunity not just to find my family and find my birth mom and find out who I am but also the opportunity when ITV came and said would' love to get it on TV in a documentary the fact that um being able to talk about disability and adoption and fostering I thought this is an amazing opportunity that I can use my voice and use my platform to hopefully get that that that opening the public because I think people in foster care sometimes have a bit of a negative view that they're always nauy that they're there reasons you know and to hopefully realize that actually that's not the case they don't choose to be in foster care and actually there's so many families that and kids that need love and they just need need a home it's great to have the support from my my parents and then my birth mom and to to find out for me it was just having all these questions that I've had for so long in my head having them answered and figuring out who actually am I from Ellie Simmons the swimmer Ellie Simmons the person I wanted to find out why and all these reasons and yeah I've been able to do that and yeah and it's just been yeah fulfilling in a way very emotional quite a tough roller Co so a lot more emotional than I thought it was going to be in a way like I'm just always like when I have something that I want to do I'm like Flink it on never realizing never thinking about the effects it's going to have before it it happens so it's been quite an emotional roller coaster and a journey but I'm so glad I did it cuz I guess this will be the first par Olympics that you know your mom is watching you yeah she um yeah and it's funny actually um when I got the chance to meet her she'd watch me in all the other Paralympics as well so has always known me um and I think that's great respect for her to even though she's watched me and supported me she's never come up and met me like she's always let me do my thing and she always said like she's going to wait for me to find her because she doesn't want to upset me or get in in the way in any sense so I thought that was quite respectful from her