Rikers Island Exposed: Prison Guard Reveals How Inmates Are Treated | Marlon Fernandez

Orientation at the Academy and Corrections even in the Academy I seen crazy as the first day of Academy within 20 minutes you would see not even the academy the orientation of Corrections within the first 20 minutes they'll call a break some people won't even come back this [ __ ] was crazy they'll go they'll go people everybody will come back they'll take attendance and they'll go all right next thing you know they're realizing names are missing they're like oh he left he left so just by listening just by them talking during orientation people were getting I don't know what but they were like nah people were probably like nah I can't do this [ __ ] welcome back to the locked in with the inck podcast on today's episode we have another correctional officer here to share his experience working on Riker Island and he reveals the conditions and how inmates are actually treated on the infamous Riker Island I want to give a big thanks and shout out to everyone that tunes into the show week after week and sometimes even watches and listens to all three of the episodes we put out weekly I would not be here without you guys locked in would not be a top 200 podcast in the world for society and the culture if it wasn't for you guys either I'm greatly appreciative and if you guys could help continue to spread the word push out your favorite episode on your Instagram on your Twitter on your Facebook share it with a friend and remember to like comment subscribe leave us a review on Spotify and apple and just continue to tune in locked in it means the absolute World guys now without further Ado let's get into this episode so sit back relax and get ready to lock in with Marlon Fernandez how do you pronounce your name Marlon Marlin Mar like Marlon Brando all just with an O though right yeah Marlon Marin where does that come from Marlon Brando typically that's where your parents uh gave you the name Marlin from well typically my father I got the name from my dad my dad uh my grandmother gave him the name uh My Funny Story um my uncle uh who passed away um when my father was born he had told my grandmother they were looking for names and they were like nah bro you got to name him Marlon like Maron Brando so that's where that name came from she named him Maron they me mar I need my son Maron oh he's a Maron too yeah so there's three Marlins it's crazy we be in places and they be like Mar everybody looking around like who you talking about like which Marlon is there like a junior and a senior there's no really not written you know there's nothing really like Marlin Junior Marlin senior we just go by all Marlins you know you look like a Marlin like you know when someone gets a name and then you can see it like you can't see them with a different name like I couldn't picture me with a different name like it fits you know it's interesting when you look at that like later on but uh Marlin welcome to locked in uh thanks for coming um pleasure having you today you drove in from Long Island yes sir uh easy ride I hope yeah man luckily no traffic no nothing yeah some I used to work in Long Island where at mipa oh yeah yeah when I worked for Whole Foods and sometimes I would come back when I was I was living in like a little Airbnb a room for like 1,300 bucks a month but I would drive back to my parents house to stay twice a week and it was always hit or miss with the traffic it's either really bad or there's no traffic yeah yeah yeah depends on the time too yeah um so you are a former Rikers Island uh correctional officer yes sir when when we label things prison guard versus correctional officer I always see a lot of people get up in arms about that how do how does that make you feel as someone that was a former officer there when you say prison guard or correction officer in all honesty it's the same thing I mean when you say prison guard you say correction officer to me the definition is the same it's just a different you're using a different term do you think it's offensive like saying prison guard I wouldn't I mean typically me if you would have say oh so youed to be a prison guard I wouldn't really I wouldn't really get offended to be honest um I don't really think there's there's a like I said I don't really think there's a difference between the two I think the two behind of it they really mean the same thing you know it's just a different term you're using so I guess there's like a negative connotation with prison guard like as if it's like demeaning towards the job yeah um but I look at them both the same way yeah when I say someone's a prison guard I don't mean it in a disrespectful way yeah yeah yeah so where did did you grow up in New York yeah I grew up in Queens okay Corona Corona New York big family big family Spanish Dominican Growing up and career aspirations um grew up mostly my mother's side of the family U my father's side of the family from Washington Heights Uptown um I used to love going up there you know I had one of the best times of my life you know hanging out in Washington Heights is full of Dominican Dominicans everywhere you know what I'm saying best food best everything parties everything you know really loving really welcoming family um yes so I grew up went to school in Queens as well went to high school there finished high school um went to college um went to John J college for criminal justice yeah criminal justice I wanted to be like a my intentions were like trying to be I wanted to be like a lawyer you know I had a lot of family members um you know that that went through the system you know that did had to do prison time um uncles my father um cousins so you know I wanted to be part of the team to kind of you know took help you know that's me you know anything I do whatever career path whatever I choose to do I want to help and anyway possible so you know seeing them go through that seeing a lot of things I was like you know what I think you know I want to be on that side I don't want to be no da no district attorney none that I ain't [ __ ] with that you know but I'll be a lawyer you know what I'm saying the money's good you know all that so it's a good career so yeah I went to John J um graduated from John J and then uh my plan started to shift I'm like damn I just graduated I'm [ __ ] exhausted during these four years I got got a Bachelor's degree I'm like damn I got to go to law school now it's another three years I got to take the Elsa it's like the SAT when it when it comes to going to college except the elsat is like for law school for those everyone probably knows that already but so I'm like [ __ ] that damn nah you know so I'm like that's why I just applied um to keep going to John Jay but in the master's program you know to get a master's degree through John J in a different major whether you know public administration or whatever the case may be weirdly after getting my bachelors in John J they didn't even accept me to get a master's there which was weird you know which was really really weird so um I said screw it whatever so um and then I had like two years after that no work mind you graduating with a bachelor's degree from a city one of the one of the best colleges in in the state and I couldn't find the job you know I was picking up gigs here and there you know what I'm saying like summer gigs here and there like seasonal jobs and it was really it was hard man it was frustrating because I'm like damn I just invested all this time you know busting my ass going to school sacrificing and it's like damn because with college and a lot of people know this too it's like you go to school you got your degree here you go good luck keep going and it's like damn all right now you got to do the work you got to be out there you got to look John J is good more for like individual je I want to say I want to be police I Want to Be Cops you know what I'm saying cuz they recruit they recruit students right out of John J like while you're Stuttering John studying in John J you're already on the map you're already in the process of becoming a cop you know so those people are they're right in you know they fall right in they take them they pull them right from there how much of those four years were actually dedicated to learning about criminal justice uh that's a good question so the first two years it's it's only two years because the first two years you're going through the general requirements General classes you got to take like high school stuff math uh English writing you know stuff like that stuff that didn't pertain to my major so it was like being in high school all over again for those first two years which was a little you know was a little boring you know so after the two years is when it got a little interesting where I'm taking like law law classes learning about different Pino codes learning about the law and learning different things so after two years when I became like a junior in uh in college was when it started to get a little interesting and I started to like a little more then the work started to bump up and got a little intense but uh so that's how that went like I mentioned graduated uh couldn't find no work I was picking up some of jobs um and then along the road I got with who my fiance is now my fiance gets pregnant My First Son um so now I'm desperate now I'm like [ __ ] the [ __ ] [ __ ] am I going to do you know what I'm saying um how old was I at the time 23 years old um I'm still a kid thinking I know what the [ __ ] I'm doing I think I know about I don't know nothing now that I think of it I'm like I didn't know you know I didn't know The Struggle to Make a Living what I was doing I'm thinking you think oh baby baby's coming oh fun people don't understand when that kick comes how real it gets you know it's real um so that's something that's yours forever that's something that's going to depend on you that person is going to be dependent on you for the rest of their life as far as you know so I'm like all right I'm pick I was working at I picked up the job in uh in uh couple of Cs I had when my when my fiance was pregnant I picked up a job driving you know I was a driver for a a pesticide company delivering freaking uh bait and [ __ ] for insects and [ __ ] and mats and Mouse um then I picked up another gig working at UPS uh overnight I like 2: in the morning I would wake up at like 2:00 in the morning I was there from like 4:00 in the morning till 9:00 in the morning and the and I was like a package handler the damn Warehouse making like 200 bucks a week like what the [ __ ] is that you know what I'm saying so it was hard man struggling all this time you know living in my parents apartment you know what I'm saying during this time and figuring out how the hell am I going to get out of here how am I going to get my own place how am I going to how am I going to do this um so from there I'm taking tests taking City test I took uh uh corrections I took MTA um sanitation I took a few tests along the way um so then correction calls um so I'm like okay I'm a little excited you know what I'm saying I'm thinking I'm running the I'm running I'm looking at it and I'm like all right how old am I now I'm 23 24 20 year retirement 44 I be retired [ __ ] I'm looking at my father my father's like 45 at the time so I'm like [ __ ] I'll be retired at his age you know what I'm saying he's still moving around he's still doing his thing I'm like all right I'll be good start a whole new life after that you know I'm like [ __ ] it you know what I'm saying and I wasn't really worried about you know anything because I Knew by me just being myself I was going to be fine you know I grew up in that environment where [ __ ] was going on you know what I'm saying things that those guys are in there for I was seeing guys doing all the time you know I was living in the neighborhood where these kind of things were happening so I wasn't really worried about none of that you know what I'm saying um so all right they called um went through went through the process went through everything uh the background investigation all that um gave me the date to start the academy started the academy uh Academy was cool Academy's like [ __ ] high school it's like going it's like being in school you know what I'm saying you're getting paid but you know it's like being in school you know studying books all that um then I get sent um Academy was like uh six months at the time um then they put me they placed me in uh ni I North infirmary command so the north infirmary command has its pros and cons it's one of the one of I want to say they say it's one of the one of the preferred buildings to work in being that thej majority of that building houses a lot of people that are like disabled or in wheelchairs or uh are sick uh have like life life like diseases and stuff lifethreatening uh uh sicknesses like AIDS and stuff like that um however so working in those areas are you know not as bad however there are two floors in that building which they call the main so there's an Annex and there's a main so in the main there's two floors that they call the second and third floor where they house the worst of the worst like it may there like the worst of the worst like these are people that most of the people they put there people that you see on you know [ __ ] that you see on the news that just happened you know what I'm saying [ __ ] around then you go to work and you find out oh [ __ ] that gu is right there you know what I'm saying you just watching the news [ __ ] you would see on the news and then you go to work and then and then the you find out oh [ __ ] you working in a housing area and that dude's in the cell right there you know what I'm saying like nothing so and that must have been probably the craziest [ __ ] I saw cuz in these housing areas in that specific area and these are the areas that you know I'm new so when you new they throw you in they throw you in the war they throw you straight in the war zone you ain't going in those sweet little spots Living Conditions in the Prison System where you know people in wheelchairs and all that so um when I got there um these housing areas are like so there sales the sales are lined up um but within the cells the cells are like within cages so it's like a cell inside a cell that makes any sense but it's the craziest [ __ ] I've ever seen you know and these guys are in there for like 22 23 hours a day you know they come out maybe for an hour for wreck and then other than that maybe the shower and that's that's about it or if they got any other services uh that they go to but that's pretty much it you know these guys are in there all [ __ ] day so this is different from the shoe or solitary this is just like no no this isn't even this is just a separate area yeah this is just an area a regular day area this is like a regular area for them this is how they live in each and every day and they're not even in the box they're not in nothing this is just because they're Max security yeah yeah they call it CMC unit what kind of charges are in there serious you got they got areas in there where they got cops that they arrest they got a whole housing area just for them cops that get arrested whether if it's for murder or for whatever they do they put them in a certain place you got guys in there that they put them there because they assaulted other officers in other areas or in other buildings whether they cut them in their face or or or whether whatever the case may be but um murder serious charges why are they sending a brand new officer to a unit like this it doesn't make sense it doesn't make sense at all the reason why they do that is because the people that have time there I don't know what you want to call it I guess they have say I don't want to go over there send the new guy over there I'm not [ __ ] working over there so it's political it's all politics send the new guy I don't want to [ __ ] go over there send him over there let him you know let him learn let him figure it out but you know you see all these news articles about how underst staffed the prison system is and this is a perfect reason why this is why you know a lot of people a lot of people leave even in the Academy I seen crazy as [ __ ] the first day of the [ __ ] Academy within 20 minutes you would see not even the academy the orientation of Corrections within the first 20 minutes they'll call a break some people won't even come back [ __ ] was crazy they'll go they'll go people everybody will come back they'll take attendance and they'll go all right next thing you know they realizing names are missing they're like oh he left he left so just by listening just by them talking during orientation people were getting I don't know what but they were like n people were probably like N I can't do this [ __ ] are there a lot of women in the academy yeah what's the breakdown you think percentage wise I want to say for the most part I want to say mostly men a little bit more than than half mostly men maybe 60 70% men the rest female and it's early 20s a lot of them were in the early 20s cuz that's something I've seen on the show like Steven Dominguez was early 20s when he joined um Leroy Ebron the Rikers Island Co I was showing you the video of that when vir he was early 20s y so are there older people in the academy or not at all funny you say that it was there was maybe one or there was maybe one lady that was there cuz there's really no age from I don't know if rules have changed now but there's really no age like uh a Max there was a lady there that was like maybe 60 years old believe it or not yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and it was crazy everyone knew who she was because because of that so everyone really like respected like yo damn you really you know what I'm saying so she did really good in the academy like she did really really good and what are the prerequisites to joining the academy all you really need as far as education wise there's really no really work experience it's really education you really need you just need a certain amount of college credits so you do need college degree yeah you need not a degree per se you just need a certain amount of credits from college whether it's like I think it's like 40 42 credits that's like a year and a half of college that's all you really need like an Associates or a little bit before like before that or so but you don't need typically a degree all you need is a high school diploma how do you feel about your kids going to college after you've experienced all this it's funny because you know me and my fiance we talk all the time and like oh when I kisss going I'm like honestly I'm going to go with whatever they want to do you know you guys want to go to college I'm going to support Pursue What You Love you you don't want to go to college you w't tell me dad I want to do this I want to invest in this I want to I got you you know what I'm saying whatever you want to do I'm going to support you and I feel like that's something that now days and this has probably been going on forever the reason why a lot of people take up certain careers and do certain things is because their parents want them to do it not because they typically want to do it you know what I'm saying they feel like damn my mother I want to do this but father my really want me to and then you do it but you don't do it happily you don't do it like you want it you know what I'm saying so it's hard you're not really interested in it and then you know you don't really give it your all cuz you don't really like it so I'm really big on doing what you love doing what you want to do and support support is is [ __ ] huge and nowadays you don't get that [ __ ] you know a lot of people it's like going to the gym I know people they don't go to the gym oh I got nobody to go with [ __ ] you mean you got nobody to go with bro were you who were you born with you you were born by your damn self bro nobody was born with you I think it's distracting to go with someone sometimes I rather go on my own cuz you talking [ __ ] yeah you bullshitting I'd rather go alone too yeah I think it depends on who you go with 100% I and I hate that unless you got like a trainer somebody who's training you all right but when I hear [ __ ] like that that [ __ ] is just stupid you know what I'm saying because and that goes to say say that you're not going to always nine times out of 10 you're not going to have that person there nobody's going to wake up and like all right how am I going to how am I going to help Mor today how am I going to get him to accomplish his dreams and people don't [ __ ] care people do not care you know what I'm saying so what I'm trying to do is you know create my own little alliance between my own little family and create something that where I'm always going to support them when no matter what they want to do my son tells me dad I want to go work I want to be a dishwasher that's what you like that's what you love go ahead boy go ahead do it you know what I'm saying like I just want them to do what they love whatever they want whatever makes them happy cuz that's what's important you make good money as a dishwasher you can like if you work your way up in a corporate place the dishwashers at Whole Food some of them are making almost you know $22 an hour yeah yeah yeah it's not terrible it's not a bad gig and then people don't see the in a lot of jobs people don't see the the the the con the I don't want to not the cons the pros things people just look at people ask you oh what do you do oh people look at what you know right away people don't understand like this there's more to certain things there's more to certain careers you know where you can go how far you can go and I think it's super important to be self- dependent to be independent and to figure out you know what you want to do and and that's why we were talking about not having a team or doing anything like that because it's certain things you're responsible for yourself exact and if you put yourself in a position where you have to conly depend on other people I mean that's why a lot of like corporations kind of fall apart or they're counting on their employees to show up and when those employees don't love what they're doing it's not going to put out a great quality service so that that's a huge key component to it it's huge because like you said they're not showing up or they're calling out sick why because they don't love it they don't really want to do it so of course not so that's why you know like a lot of people I respect people that do things on their own you know they they set they come up with their own business or you know it's just them in their family member or whatever the case may be they keep a small team you know that they trust and that they can grow with which is big but yeah that goes to say um support like I mentioned I think is huge and motivation it's called self motivation you got to just have that and that's not something you can teach someone like I can't teach somebody you can tell someone you can try to drill it in I'm like look listen this is how things are you're going to have to and they can hear you out but you can't really teach someone that you gotta just you gotta find a way to have that in you yeah you gotta have that it Factor You Gotta Have It You Gotta Have It there's people that they don't do certain things because you know they're depressed they're stressed out so they don't feel like getting up you know they're not they don't want to look for a job because they just broke up with their girl and maybe they going through Overcoming Obstacles and Pursuing Goals some [ __ ] and dude you got to get up it's only going to get worse you know what I'm saying you got to keep moving you know what I'm saying and and a lot of things like that hold people back you know what I'm saying from what they want to do things [ __ ] in life holds you like there's people that want to do whether you want to be a rapper you want to be actor whatever you want to do but then certain [ __ ] phases in your life kind of can kind of hold you back from that whether it's um responsibilities and other things but you got to kind of find a way through those holes to get to where you want to go that's just life yeah and I think when you find your your purpose like your life's purpose like what you want to do that that the things that happen along the way won't derail you like if I lost something right now I have an ultimate mission that I'm on that will keep me on track whereas if I worked a normal job cuz like I remember like when I was working a normal job and I'd go through a breakup or something would happen I don't want to go to [ __ ] work like I don't because I don't have to exactly with this I have to show up to this interview I can't call you and say oh I had a bad night last night you know I'm not doing the interview exactly so that keeps you on track exactly and a lot of people don't have that you know you got to have that in you um and that's something I'm really big on you know I could be I can go to work one day and and and be all smiles like meanwhile look like the happiest person in the world meanwhile you don't know what the [ __ ] just happened before I got here you don't know what the [ __ ] transpired the night before and this morning I could have went through God knows what these past few days but no one would ever know you know what I'm saying because it's in reality I'm really big on like um I don't really like I'm not really an excuse type of a person I don't really like giving excuses you know to me it's like all right that happened that's understandable you know it's like it's like paying your bills paying your rent [ __ ] what are you going to do you try to pay your rent at the end of the month and you tell your landlord damn uh excuse me but uh me and my girl broke up you know and I haven't been feeling well you know I got sick one week I had to take off of work for a month and you know my car hasn't been working so I had to drop some money in my car you's going to go oh yeah well where's where's the rent you know all right that's fine I'm sorry to hear that but where's the rent for the month where's the rent money they don't care about none of that [ __ ] so what are you going to do you know you have to keep moving and not you got to figure that out you got to just have that yeah it's funny you say that because when I was a kid running businesses and stuff and I never had the money for vendors and I would always like tell my landlord for the club or whatever that I owed to and I'd give them all these excuses and when I look back on it now it's like it's not their problem like that was on me to figure it out I was like I was in over my head and and not moving correctly but like now it's just it's totally different when you have that knowledge and power yeah cuz you figure it out you know I was like that as well you know growing up I was really naive you know as a kid I thought everyone was nice the world was just this friendly [ __ ] place where everybody was cool and everybody was nice and everybody is understanding and everybody wants the best for you but as Life Goes On You see certain things and you witness certain things and you go through certain things you realize it's really not like right now I feel like the majority of the world is is really for themsel like it's how I see it it's every man for themself right now for themsel or for them and their their Circle whether it's their wife their family and stuff like that exactly you know what I'm saying now you were mentioning that you had family that was in the system how'd they feel about you one wanting to go into law enforcement and then two going into Corrections Rikers Island which I'm sure some of your family members were incarcerated on yeah no they were they they typically they were telling me they were like yeah you know you should pursu it it's a good gig you know you retire and you know all the all the good stuff you know you retire in 20 years but the majority of them were already in the system already working there one had just retired maybe two years before I had joined and then the The Gray Area of Criminal Justice other the others were probably already like halfway through halfway through retiring and more than halfway through retiring so everyone really I wouldn't really see them as much but uh you know they were for it what about the ones that had gotten arrested did you have family members that were ever in the system course how they feel they kind of supported me the way they were like no it's a good job they put all that [ __ ] aside they were like no you know it's a good job you should try it you know I think you'll do fine you know what it is you know what I'm saying you grew up you know you've seen us you've been in the area you grew up in an environment so you'll be fine you know what I'm saying and again I'm the type of person that I'm always myself you know I don't try to be something I'm not I'm not trying like I was always myself so I never had any issues as a correctional I never did never had no issues at all you know yeah um cuz the MH they they see that they know all right yeah he M they used to call me my last name Fernandez so they will call me f Fernandez so n f is real you know he cool he cool people you know what I'm saying I was I was in like you know busting nobody's chops you know what I'm saying being I wasn't nah man I would I would as the majority of the tour just talking talking to these guys going from cell to cell just yo what up man what's good talking [ __ ] whether it's about the game the baseball game or whatever the [ __ ] it was just talking man because how the majority of the time these guys they just want to talk they just want someone to talk to you know what I'm saying they locked in there for like 23 like I mentioned 22 23 hours a day you know what I'm saying sometimes just staring at the wall you know they just want to talk so does that make you think about humans and like the psychology behind that like some of these guys commit maybe murders or horrible crimes and you're just having a conversation with them about baseball but Society doesn't see that like that they don't see it like that and that goes to say is is is it's messed up because Society will see it as oh no this guy's a murderer that's it he's a murderer don't [ __ ] talk to him get away from he's a murderer that's it and it's [ __ ] up because you know everyone deserves a chance you don't know maybe Willet that you don't know if the person was suffering from you know mental health or he was suffering from something that we don't know about you know we don't know there's more to there's always more to everything and I feel like Society especially the court system they don't care you know what I'm saying they don't care half the time more than half the time um you know when people go to trial for certain cases and then their lawyers are trying to bring in all these expert Witnesses like doctors and therapists that are talking about yeah to prove that this person was suffering from this suffering from that suffering from this suffering from that so all these list of things are medication then when they go to sentence him they're still going to give him 25 years to life like all that was like nless to say like almost like it didn't even matter but he still did this so none of that [ __ ] matters it's just it's such a gray area because you look at maybe someone that like harmed a child and you or harmed a woman or anything there's this gray area of okay they did this horrible thing but then there's also like they're a human too and you have to be compassionate but then you also they have consquences of their and I like right now Society it's either one way or the other there's no in between of having like a balance yeah no you either got to and that's true that's true what you're saying but like I mentioned um again these guys that are there specifically in Rikers Island you know the innocent until proven guilty that's what you're doing there in Ras Island you're not serving time is you know there is a building there there's one building that you know usually like if you get sentenced like a year or less they might put you in you might just do your time there but I want to say 99.9% of the people in regular Island are not sentenced yet you know they're going to trial they're fighting the case so the way I see it is everybody should be treated fairly you know you shouldn't if someone's on trial for whatever it is doesn't mean that oh don't talk to this don't [ __ ] with him because this is this and that you know what I'm saying and and that is another issue that's going on right now where you you know new new I feel like new officers that are coming on you know let's say you know they're building relationship Challenges Working with Others with the m you know they learning the job you know they're learning everything you know a lot of older officers would come like specifically with me and they'll be like yo yeah that dude whatever whatever don't I don't like them so don't and I'll be what do you mean you don't like him so you're telling me not to not to talk to him not to the [ __ ] you know what what that got like what does that have to do with me what what do you mean but they wouldn't really say you know why or just yo n don't if he asks you for this don't give him [ __ ] and I'm like what do you mean like why why were you telling me not to give him [ __ ] for if he askes me for services or whatever the case may be so I would never pay no mind when they would tell me that [ __ ] I would just go about me you know go about my business and go about my tour and do what I needed to do and treat everybody fair you know I'll by past all that information but that just goes to say how it's it's it's it's [ __ ] up right now because it's like you know what I'm saying and a lot of times too these CEOs they'll look at you like they'll look at you like as The Outsider if you're doing that you know oh you're not oh it may tell your friends oh they your friends now or and it's like you know what I'm saying it's weird it's really really really weird but you know me I was really just strictly on my own path trying to go down the road you know I had a goal you know so I'm like you know what I'm gonna do what I got to do you know I'm G to stick to myself but it's hard to stick to yourself in that in that kind of job because you got to work with other officers you know most of the time you can't just work by yourself you know you're on the floor and then there's another officer usually there's only two officers you know or an officer on the floor another one in the booth or outside in the control room whatever the case may be um but you got to work with other people so a lot of times um you might not be on the same page with everyone and then when you're new sometimes it's kind of hard to to uh you know um do certain things the way you want to do it because they're going to expect you to do how they want to do it no on a shift isn't there one point Co that's working like I know in the FED there would be say three officers working and then one would be the point then there would be the second point and then the third Point yeah how they call it in other words it's like one officer on the floor and then there'll be one like let's say if there's a booth like the B officers on the floor with all the inmates and then the other officers and like let's say the bubble in the booth so typically there's only two I wouldn't really say three for the most part it's just two one is like away from everything like hitting half of the time or the majority almost all the time and then um the other half of the time it's the be office on the floor you know during the tour and then sometimes you ain't going nowhere sometimes you're there for eight hours and then you think you going home and it's like all right where's my relief at I got to get the [ __ ] out next thing you know you get a call in the control room they're like all right uh I'm going to need you to stay there till and you're like mind you you getting ready to leave and it's like [ __ ] like damn you know what I'm saying that shit's hard for someone who has a family you know what I'm saying and you got you know you got you got arrangements and [ __ ] like that next thing you know you don't even know when you're going home the [ __ ] is so crazy there was times where I'll be done with my tour I go to the locker room change I'll be walking out the door yeah I'm walking out [ __ ] Captain open the door right on me what day they call it this so in Corrections is they call it uh you work four days and you're off two so they ask you what day it is for you usually when it's your first day of the week or your last day they'll try to keep you there for like for like it's the last day of the week they'll try to keep you there for as long as they could so a lot of times I'm like [ __ ] my last you know I didn't know what the [ __ ] to say I'm like damn [ __ ] should I say it's my second my third [ __ ] so I'll be like they're like oh no I need you to go somewhere go back down go change and I'll be like damn you know what I'm saying and I got to call home and be like listen man I'm sorry I can't you know I can't make it to this or that we can't you know whatever Arrangements I had I would have to switch everything around and it's hard you know when you got a family you got like that job is good for uh people Challenges of being a correctional officer that you know what I'm saying that young people like in their early 20s that are trying to get somewhere that are figuring it out um because it's hard when you got a family to be a correction officer a lot of people leave because of that reason you know what I'm saying that they're not home you're there more than you are in your house yeah I mean they save the other person that's spends just as much as time in in prisons and jails as the correctional officers as inmates if not more cuz if you're working 20 years and someone serving a 10year sentence you're doing more time than the guy that did the 10e sent exctly you're in there with them you know what I'm saying and so that's mandated over time like you can't say I'm going home like you have to do that right typically you have to if you're ordered by a captain yo you have to stay there's people that you know what I'm saying that um have been there quite a while you know they leave but not [ __ ] that what you mean I'm saying I'm out you know what I'm saying I've been there maybe 10 years or 15 years or so but me I'm [ __ ] new I ain't [ __ ] you know what I'm saying so I'm just trying to keep my job so I'm like damn you know whatever you know what I'm saying and that you know that's what I was scared of I was scared of losing my job you know what I'm saying cuz I had a baby on the way you know I have people depending on me I'm the only one employed at the time so I was just trying to you know do what I had to do to keep to keep working have you ever seen mistakes happen when someone's like say working a double like forgetting to maybe lock a cell or or maybe acting rude to an inmate and then that inmate retaliates people get frustrated you know what I'm saying when you working that long you know sometimes you might fall asleep you there 14 15 hours you fall out Captain Walk in oh [ __ ] that's a depending on the Rel ship you got with the captain that could be automatic right up or they might give you they might tell you yo get up man go go to the bathroom was your face come back you know if they know you've been there for like 13 14 hours already but so [ __ ] can happen you know I've seen doors like you know forget to be unlocked you know what I'm saying important [ __ ] like emergency exit doors and [ __ ] like that so [ __ ] like that does happen and it's a lot because of all the [ __ ] that's going on at the same time you know what I'm saying the amount of time you're there for sometimes you're not even relieved for a meal for a break and your meals like what I think like if I can't remember like 40 minutes so it's crazy you know what I'm saying so yeah and from an inmates perspective like when that happens when the guards are doing the OT sometimes we get neglected cuz we we miss a shower or like when we're in the shoe and solitary or whatever and that screws up a system cuz in our minds we're programmed to have this system um so it could suck and there could have like Mental effects and and and cause anger and that's one thing that and that's one thing in there you have to follow through you know if you tell a house okay every day there's a schedule services are at a certain time Recreation is usually at a certain time breakfast lunch all that thenner is usually at a certain time so when you're not following through you know and the inmates are cooperating they say you tell them you look listen sorry this and this happened but you know we're on it though you know half the time majority of the time they be like all you no doubt but you know if it's something that happens consistently and consistently you know they tend to get upset of course if they're entitled if you're entitled to something and you're not getting it of course you're going to get upset of course you're entitled to a shower you're arted to Recreation for an hour on a certain day your services you know so when they're not getting the services when they're supposed to of course you're going to get upset you know and a lot of that happens because of like you mentioned because either the staff or people forgetting or sometimes Coos don't even want to deal with a certain housing area so they won't even go excuse me they won't even go let's say uh let me give you an example uh uh a house let's say 2C whatever 2ct whatever the case may be they'll look at the names and be like oh no I I don't want to take that D out I don't want to deal with that and it's [ __ ] up because then now um the officer on the floor that's working there has to kind of deal with that cuz now the MA's asking yo what's up with my wreck what's up with my wreck and you're calling Recreation officer like yo what's up you guys coming to get them and sometimes they'll say yeah yeah yeah it might not Living conditions and hygiene in prison even come it might not even come and then this is just building and it's building and it's building and then it could it could lead to other things you know how are the living conditions actually for inmates on Rikers it's hard bro like what's the truth behind it cuz the media you know when they get invited into prisons they never get the full story and they setting like this you know we get the truth yeah they never really show the media as far as in there as far as but it's hard in there bro it's really really hard you know they get maybe one as far as like you know it is dirty in there it is really dirty in there and um what do you mean by dirty as far as like you know simple as the showers you know what I'm saying the showers are not you know they got like a team that comes in and cleans up you know what I'm saying they call them the uh uh is it sanitation I think it's sanitation if I can remember sanitation will come and clean up or whatever the case may be but they'll come once maybe day you know what I'm saying but the amount of stuff that goes on their day you know what I'm saying it's it's not enough you know it's not enough for them and then at the same time too you know they'll give these guys one toothbrush one it's like one of everything like dude how you going to give you know these people are entitled to more you know what I'm saying and um so it's hard you know it's hard as far as you know what they're giving them you know hygiene hygienic stuff just for them to survive every day they're not giving them enough as opposed to what they need you know is that because there's not enough supplies or is it because you guys are being ordered don't give out more than one to be honest now you say that I never work commissary but I remember sometimes um you know I would see uh imal goal they'll go to commissary they'll go to get this [ __ ] and it's like they'll be like let me get they'll be like nah I'm only giving you one and they like what you mean but now here just you know now I don't know I don't know if they're being or if the comment officers are being told by their supervisor to not give them a certain amount or they just don't have but you know that is something that I did definitely see and it's it's it's it's [ __ ] up you know what I'm saying what about the toilet paper situation cuz in the feds it's very sacred like you they only pass it out twice a month they have like a name on a list all of that how does that work at Rikers yeah that toilet paper [ __ ] is crazy not you say that you just reminded me when they ask for paper usually they'll tell you to to um take the paper and rip it roll it and then give them like a piece how the [ __ ] you going to give that [ __ ] is crazy normally I'll just give them a whole roll like if they ask me I'd be like here I'll just give it to them how the [ __ ] you going to take what is it you roll like what like not even not even two three layers of toilet paper you how are they going to use the bathroom with that that's that [ __ ] is crazy so like I said typically I'll just give him I'll just give it to him like here I'll give him the whole roll like here just take it I'm not going to you know on the topic of toilet paper what are some unique and like crazy things you've seen Dam damage wise to a cell with toilet paper like I remember we used to put toothpaste on and cover the vents and you know they'd overflow the toilets and everything like that yeah yeah yeah they do that I've seen that like I've seen the toilets uh overflowed um like you mentioned but with toilet paper I don't really seen much as much as far as like uh cells being damaged and stuff it's more like you know written stuff and writing in the cell and stuff like that but with toilet paper not really like I've heard of I've heard of uh uh I've never actually witnessed it but I've heard of um this one aate that was there he would like he would save like his feces like he would use it and he would save it he would put it in the thing of toilet Pap and then if he didn't like you he would throw that [ __ ] at you yeah I heard that that's common at Rikers like to get feces thrown in yeah yeah yeah that [ __ ] does happen why why does it happen I guess it's a it's a sense of anger you know if you're upset you know I'm not going to put my hands on you but I'm going to throw I'm going to throw this bucket of [ __ ] at you I'm going to throw this bucket a urine at you you know what I'm saying and how do they do that if they're in the cells I mean it's I haven't typically I haven't witnessed it like I mentioned however there's gaps in between the cells you know cuz there's Gates so you can just easily flick something at somebody oh so these are bar cells they're not like the door the metal door Corruption and mistreatment in Riker's Island where it has a tray slot no no no they're like well where I was at most of them were bars okay you know what I'm saying so now did you work in this Max unit your whole time there in the beginning no cuz in the beginning they Tred to like uh uh uh like slow you into it and so they had me like in the annex like with the people in the wheelchair and stuff like that and they slowly started pushing me there to that to that area and that's where you fulfilled the rest of your time there um for the most part yeah that's kind of where I was at until I left now something like Stephen G Dominguez showed us was that there was a ton of corruption in Riker's Island are you seeing and witnessing that firsthand as a an officer what I'm seeing what what I've noticed a lot is like I mentioned is like as far as the Mal treatment to the inmates like it's just like I mentioned it's just not fair the way they treating them like we mentioned before the services they're not giving them the services they they're entitled to or or what um what they're supposed to get or they're denying them services like let's say if a if an inmate has let's say uh counseling at a certain time and let's say they don't like them [ __ ] that when I when you know cut that for him for the day how you going to do that cuz now you giving the officer that's on the floor you're going to give him now he has to kind of deal with that cuz the ma is going to be asking him yo what's up with this what's up with this and you don't know what to do you're calling you're like damn you know what I'm saying you're trying to figure it out and they're probably ignoring the officer you know what I'm saying just to not deal with it but I'm luckily I didn't really have to go through any of that kind of stuff um but definitely um as far as that um the Mal treatment is definitely huge right now there and and it's just not fair and that's really the main reason I want to say why um I had to leave and I had to resign cuz I didn't agree I didn't agree with any of that you know with the way that we're being treated and the way I feel like you're wherever you're at um whatever career you're in is mostly because you support what they're doing or you support that I wasn't supporting that I wasn't for that you know I wasn't agreeing with that that wasn't me um so I say you know what it's time for me to step away and I stepped away and I how many years did you do there I was only there for like a year oh you just a year yeah yeah so you you had enough after a year yeah yeah yeah yeah that bad it was there for a year and the reason why was cuz um I kind of saw where things were going so I'm the type of person where if I see where something is going and I see already the direction is heading like you know what all right let me let me remove myself now before this gets worse you know so I felt like it was the time for me to where do you think the problem stems from from is it the higher ups is it the state level is it just the officers in general where do you think the problem stems I think it's just the I think it's just the the officers themselves you know what I'm saying and and and then you know them just wanting to do [ __ ] they want to do the way they want to do it you know and doing whatever they want that's pretty much what it is and you know sometimes a supervisor you know they'll tell them you'll do this but most of the time they're doing [ __ ] the way they want to do it you know what I'm saying so um but like higher ups with like Chiefs and all that they you don't even see those people you don't see Chiefs you don't see you know you don't see none of those people ever so all of that really comes with just like I mentioned really really the officers that are there and whatever officers are present honestly no and your opinion say we took 10 officers lined them all up out of those 10 how many do you think are actually care and and are for the inmates I don't know if not none maybe one really you know what I'm saying if you would asked me they don't give a [ __ ] they don't care you know what I'm saying me I would be there most of the time I'm feeling bad for these [ __ ] people I'm feeling bad for these guys you know what I'm saying cuz it's [ __ ] up it's bad enough you're in jail you know what I'm saying it's bad enough that you're there so you know the way I saw it was all right I'm going to be here to try to all right how can I help them as much as possible so that things go smooth for them so that to make their time go a little easier while they're here you know what I'm saying it's not it's bad enough they're in jail so but not everyone sees it that way everyone sees it differently some Harsh Treatment of Inmates people see it [ __ ] that he's in jail he's an inmate he's full of [ __ ] don't give him nothing treat him like [ __ ] and that's not right is there one inmate story that like you'll never forget that you encountered in there um One inmate story I want to say maybe the maybe the the the craziest [ __ ] I seen was maybe um it was during my training my training when I first started this dude kind of this dude try to hang himself try to hang himself in the cell so I remember a whole [ __ ] load of officers ran in took them down they had a spray a whole bunch of crazy [ __ ] remember mind you I'm training I'm on the side I'm just like oh [ __ ] but and this guy was typically known to kind of to kind of do to kind of do those things you know whenever he wasn't getting and that goes to say when they're not getting what they're entitled to you know he was known to do stuff like that when he wasn't getting his services or what he was entitled to get [ __ ] like that would happen so uh yeah and things like that happened for reasons like I mentioned before um they happen all the time they happen these are things that happen every day this is normal in razil and people commit suicide young kids kids 15 or 16 17 years old you know I don't know if you heard of that famous story uh that Khalif Browder story yeah kid was 16 R is Island he that [ __ ] [ __ ] him up so bad that when he came home well he committed suicide when he was already home but that [ __ ] damaged him so bad that he couldn't you know and that's a [ __ ] up story do you think inmates are punished for having mental health issues at Riker's Island like cuz in my experience a lot of inmates M they don't want to admit that they're struggling mentally because you're just thrown into a room in a in a [ __ ] Turtle suit or you're stripped of your clothes and you're sitting there with nothing yeah that's I feel like that's punishment yeah yeah like I would see dudes that were on suicide watch don't give them like this I don't even know what it's called they will have nothing on they'll just give them this thing to put on it was like this [ __ ] this weird thing where I've seen in like the dentist like you know you know when you about to get an x-ray in the dentist office and they put this thing on you for the radiation some Chef I don't even know what it's called but I know some people call it like a turtle soup but probably it's probably that it's probably that but that's what they would give them you know and that's all they would have on and then they got them all the way in the back you know what I'm saying alone and it's like damn like you know this guy should have people coming to talk to him throughout the day he should have counselors coming to talk to him to to you know to keep him calm or you know to help him out but you know you you're denying the guy his medication you're denying him uh counseling or whatever the case may be and you're just making the situation worse you know and it's not right on the topic of inmate treatment how actually is the food at Riker's Island like what's what's the reality of it yeah the food from what I've seen and don't laugh at me I actually ate the food from there yeah I think you're the first guard that said they've eaten the food yeah yeah yeah I've eaten the [ __ ] from the kitchen from the staff kitchen the chicken all that I've had it you know I've had it not on a daily basis but I've had it um but yeah you know the food could be better from what I've seen but they could definitely improve on a lot of that you know as far as the food and stuff like that you know um the breakfast sometimes they'll have I would see sometimes the CEO making the breakfast himself and I'm like wait a minute C are doing it but yeah that definitely is something too that you know could be could be improved are the portions small is the Taste yeah it's like [ __ ] one they give them these little ra and they'll put one some corn and another slot a piece of chicken and another slot maybe a juice and here you go you're [ __ ] starving after that yeah like if they're skimpy on hygiene what's to say they're not going to be skimpy on exactly on food as well and that's what's [ __ ] up about it like they're not giving them what they as much as they're supposed to you know which is causing a lot of you know like we mentioned before a lot of other [ __ ] leads to other things what was the final straw for you to resign there had to been like a moment where you're like I'm done I'm not going back well it was already leading it was boiling up it was leading up it was leading up to you know every day I was like seeing all this [ __ ] going on and I'm like you know Leaving the Job in Frustration I'm not you know I'm not you know I'm not liking this [ __ ] this shit's not shit's not for me and I'm you know I'm going home every day I'm talking to my fiance I'm like yo I'm thinking about I don't know man but this shit's a little you know I don't know you know and at the same time like [ __ ] you know if I leave I don't got a job lined up I don't got nothing lined up after this so um while I'm there I'm trying to at least line something up so that if I leave I have you know I have employment I have somewhere to go I have other work so I'm like damn I can't just leave so like one day I went and then um it's crazy I just walked in once a roll call and after that I just looked at myself and said you know what I'm out bro I'm not doing it that's it I'm out just like that I went I told him yo uh I'm out of here all right you out let's have this let's have that turned all my [ __ ] in turned in what I had to get in give him the shield next thing you know I was gone and that was it did that burn a bridge for future uh city jobs no hell no because people retire people not retire people resign all the time like I mentioned so I didn't you know I wasn't terminated or nothing like that or or written up or or anything I resigned I simply just left people leave every day there's no there's no there's nothing in Corrections that says that you can't leave or when you can leave you like I said there was people that were leav in the first day of orientation or even in the academy people were resigning and leaving so there's really no say as to when you have to leave or how long you have to work there for you know how'd that make you feel you had this plan I mean you went you did the four years at College you thought you were going to get a job you didn't and then when you stumbled upon correction you're like okay I'm going to do this for 20 years retire I have a plan how' that make you feel once that plan fell apart that was hard I'm not going to lie you know I had this whole [ __ ] set up like all yeah you know before I took the job like I said I'm like it won't be bad you know what I'm saying I'll be fine you know I'm not really worried about getting assaulted or none of that cuz I'm like nah I'm not you know so when all that [ __ ] ended I was like damn mind you I'm starting from scratch excuse me now I'm at Square One all over again no job don't know what the [ __ ] I'm doing don't know what's happening with a college degree but then I can't find work still with the degree so it was really [ __ ] frustrating for a while for like a good uh I want to say maybe like a good year or so I was like no work nothing so all my plans were just so I'm trying to figure out what to do all right [ __ ] what am I going to do I'm trying to reach out to Old College friends that I went to school with that you know to see what they're doing you know that could probably help me out or or or or guide me to what you know certain careers that they're in now so I hit up a friend of mine I went to school with um he was a case manager at uh this agency in uh up in Westchester so uh he told me yeah you know they hiring just apply you know what I'm saying so I applied and luckily you know they called me you know I got the interview and Luckily everything worked out you know and I got the job so and I loved it you know it was case work it was working with families um youths as well young kids from like 14 to 21 years old um and kind of helping them uh get the resources they need um a lot of them were uh immigrants as well um that were like either approached at the border or caught at the broader or uh you know arrested they didn't have any papers or anything like that so um it was a lot of it had to do with getting them back with their families you know so that they wouldn't have to go back and get deported back to their home country you know so I was doing that for a while and then after that um I started doing what I'm doing now was pretty much the same thing you know helping families helping them apply for public assistance any kind of assistance they need resources whether it's you know food stamps or applications for SSI and a whole bunch of different things and guiding them through things you know so um it feels good to do that you know CU I like to help like I mentioned before that's that's what I want to do you know what I'm saying and I was an environment in an environment in rers island where um none of that [ __ ] goes on none of them are there to help anybody or or to make the situation better for anyone so which is why I needed to remove myself from that do when you see the news about Rikers and stuff does that make you Rikers Island's Future angry because it's constantly in the news and they talk about closing it and the conditions this and that how does that make you feel I see this [ __ ] all the time and all they talk about oh they've been saying for years that they were going to shut it down and they were going to create these buildings and all the Burrows and and and but I feel like they're not going to they ain't going to do anything they're not going to do [ __ ] they're not going to do nothing about it I don't think that place is going anywhere to be honest cuz from what I'm hearing from what I seen on the news you know neighborhoods they don't really want those certain neighborhoods don't really want those they want to put certain buildings certain jails they want to build small jails with the neighborhoods you know and people don't really want that you know they live in these neighborhoods so honestly I don't really think they're going to do anything about that um when it comes to that I feel like rer island is just always going to be there yeah to be honest you know do you feel like you found your purpose now in life after kind of going through the motions of different jobs and and what you've experienced hell yeah and I feel like that's something just in life you know um you have to go through certain things to figure out what it is you really want to do and where you belong you know people people's plans change every day not every well yeah things change all the time so um like me you know I went to John J waned to be a lawyer not end up being a lawyer end up being a correction officer and from correction officer than being a casew worker so um things have changed along the way and then I also got into while in college I would do um I like always had a passion for acting acting was always my you know I never really had the time to do it but I've always had a passion so while in college I was doing like background work you know you familiar with background work it's like you know you get paid like $100 for the day you go sit on a set for like 16 20 hours sometimes you don't even use you but you know um I had a passion for it so much I didn't really have no one to tell me no this is what you need to do you know you need a manager you need an agent you need to create footage of yourself a demo so that to it's like a resume but I didn't know that so I had to kind of figure that out while doing background I came across certain people and met certain people that uh kind of explained that to me yo Mar this is what you need to do this background [ __ ] you know it's not going to get you nowhere so from there I created a demo real created footage of myself um head shots um and I put it out there then uh a manager reached out to me offered me a contract um and I took it right away you know what I'm saying then after I got the manager um the agent came along see when it comes with you can't have two agents several agents but you can have a manager and an agent you know what I'm saying so right now I'm working with a manager and an agent um booking little gigs here and there you know I haven't really got I haven't really got that breakout role you know but I've been on a few things on CBS this show called um it only had one season they ended it after the first season um East New York I don't know if you heard of it on CBS but I've done that um you were you you're casting in it yeah it was it was a co-starring role that's was a co-star rooll had a roll in everything just one season though yeah it was one episode one season it was like a day play a row this wasn't background this wasn't nothing so I was hyped you know I had and this is a paid gig yeah it was paid that's awesome it was paid cuz I'm in the union too I'm in s part of sag after okay um so uh it was it was a great experience you know I have my own little trailer have my own yeah it was fire did they take care of you like yeah yeah they bring you your food they bring you your breakfast they bring you all that you know so they canceled the show though or it was only one season and it had good actors in it you know there was actors in it that you know had pretty good actors so I was actually surprised but I guess you know it's what was it about it was like it's like a little low and ordish type of thing like a cop show you know and what was your what like what was your character yeah I play like a defendant on trial okay yeah I play like a defendant on trial and I was in the room the whole time and on trial for for um for like murder and you had speaking lines it was like one line okay but I was hype you know what I'm saying I never had a line before you know I'm always doing I'm doing background I'm used to being I'm used to being The Importance of Going Through Stages in the Acting Industry somewhere for like [ __ ] 20 hours just with 100 people and you're like this and you're trying to get in front of this that [ __ ] that [ __ ] sucks man but again that goes to say in order for you to get to where you want to be you got to go through certain stages if it wasn't for background I don't think I would have learned what I knew now and and learn the steps that I need to know it's a process yeah and you you keep going and going if you make a little bit more progress each way you know and it works itself out yeah yeah and it's something you know it's something to show on your resume because when you you know when you when you want to book a role where it's a season regular role and these Big Time Shows they're going to look at what you've done you know even though all right I did this show you know it wasn't really much but it was a hit it was a it was a hit show on a on a on a on a platform on a network on CBS which was you know so they look at that like oh [ __ ] you were on that you had a coold starring role so that's what matters doesn't matter how many lines it was it doesn't matter what it was matters that I landed the role and I got the rooll you know what show I like that one that 50 Cent produced about the guy from that from I think it was New York that got sentenced to life in prison became a lawyer for life for that [ __ ] is huge yeah but I did they stopped there right they can I think that [ __ ] only went on for like two seasons that was it it was two or three I think it was three it was either two or three but it was big I really enjoyed it it just kind of went off its path like it started really good I feel like once he left prison it kind of unraveled um but I it was a great great uh serious and that was the thing when I was watching it when he left jail I was like damn I'm like how they going to keep this going like it started to like you said the real wasn't sustainable things started to change but I figured maybe you know maybe they'll just create um I figured in my head all right he'll he'll be a lawyer he'll just take on different cases and maybe they'll just continue it like that and I think the ratings kind of dropped he tried it that's what happened with orange and is a new black the ones that left prison or the story lines different yeah those stories suck I'm still pissed we were talking about earlier they canceled ghost yeah man doesn't make sense one of my favorite [ __ ] shows man that whole sequel is fire man all of that they announced the prequel though with uh about um Tommy and ghost I heard about that I hope they make they bring those guys back that's he that'll be great they're going to have to like they're going to have to bring him like have to without a doubt it's literally my favorite television show that's why it was so great to have Giani on the show and connect with yeah that's fire yeah that's my [ __ ] that's my favorite show and you know I got to audition for one of the roles for the last season that came of ghost yeah oh you got audition what were you auditioning for there was a recurring role do you watch the show right you know the RO you you know you know remember the family that played uh um at the end I don't want to spoil you nothing but at the end when you know that family the family they killed the brothers the Spanish yeah the Spanish with the mom and they killed them in the diner with the gas in the family one of those Brothers I don't know if you remember the name guo he didn't really had much he didn't really have much lines but I ended up auditioning for that role and when I when I got the when I got the [ __ ] for my manager I was hype I said oh [ __ ] what cuz we would talk I've always told her from the beginning I got to get on power I got you got to [ __ ] send me something I got to get on this [ __ ] so when I got it I was hyped but you know it's hard because you got maybe 150 to 200 people auditioning for these recurring roles you know so they they they shoot they audition that many people for it typically when it comes to I don't know about that specific role but generally speaking from what I've learned you know going to all these casting director seminars and all these things generally speaking when it comes to recurring or recurring role it's like 150 to 200 self tapes they're looking at and I don't even know if they're looking at all of them who knows if they're looking at all those tapes and were you actually called to a physical audition or it's all online it was a self tape like now typically everything ever since Co they they do self tape rather than have people come in cashing directors they're just watching tapes from their house and you're just reading lines yeah they send Acting Tips and Self-Tape Challenges you the script you know and then you'll do the tape whether you get your little uh your ring light or you go to a a coaching Studio have a professional do it which I used to do in the beginning with the coach but after a while I kind of learned the ropes and then I started just kind of doing it on my own so now I kind of have my own little setup where I live now and what are you speaking to the camera you're not looking directly at the camera they don't want you to look into the lens but you know let's say I'm looking at you I might look slightly I'm move my eye slightly to the right or just reading the lines and you read the lines yeah in the character that you think do they give you a description of how it should be read yeah yeah so though not really necessarily sometimes they'll put notes or they'll say uh this character is very angry so be sure to show emotion or show anger and stuff like that sometimes they don't and you got to kind of you don't really know so there's really no right or wrong to that you just got to do what you think do they give you feedback if you don't get it that's the thing with self tapes and reason why I really don't like self tapes as much is because in person let's say I'm auditioning right now and I you might tell me all right Marlin let's do it again you know but do it a little bit like this with self tapes you send it in you you don't hear back you don't know what you don't hear back until unless you get the role so it's like [ __ ] damn sometimes you don't know all right did I do good did you like it was it what you were looking for and that's the only thing I don't really like about sub tapes is is is [ __ ] like that like I don't yeah you don't get the feedback you don't get the feedback you know opposed to being face to face yeah I like face to face i' rather that too like I have casting agents reach out to me directly all the time for like stuff that cuz they see me and they want me on but they want you to fill out like a a survey and a resume and then do a tape I don't even waste my time with any of that anym man and it's different it's different you know you you feel it you know it's different when you're in front of somebody you know absolutely cuz you can tweak things you can say all right do it like this now do it like that they're never generally speaking they're never doing that when you send the tape in you know either they like it or they don't and they move on to the next clip and they just keep scrolling what advice would you give to someone that's kind of like struggling to to figure things out in their life career-wise or maybe they were in the the role of an inmate and and you know going through it what advice would you give to someone I just want to say you know like keep going you know what I'm saying like I said it's never too late people think like oh damn I did this I'm 40 I'm this age and how am I going it's never too late like I feel like you just got to keep going and find that motivation like we spoke about earlier not 10 times out of 10 nobody's going to be there to push you or tell you what to do you got to have that you got to figure that out and just find what you love do what you love [ __ ] with people telling you oh there's no money in that there's no career in that there's nothing in that you know what I'm saying half of the time most of the people if you're not becoming a doctor or a lawyer or a [ __ ] scientist or a you're not professional it's not you know what I'm saying and that's [ __ ] you know what I'm saying there just why a lot I feel like a lot of time kids teenagers and stuff like that you know what I'm saying they don't they lose a passion for going to school because they feel like if they go to school they got to do you know they got to pursue things they don't want to do and that's not that's not true there's other things you can do you can act you become an artist an actor or a rapper or a sing whatever you want to do there there's no there's no nothing out there no law that says you can't you know pursue these things absolutely with me is like do what you love and that support isn't always going to be there you just got to you just got to have it in you and just do it anyway definitely no one's going to push you to do it well Marlin thank you for coming on the show today thank thanks for taking the time to sit with me on a Saturday morning hell yeah man I'm a parent so yeah I'm a parent so we got to do this [ __ ] early I got to you know I got to get back absolutely well you know I wish you the best and um hopefully this episode inspires some people and um send me next time you're uh you're casting something and send me that CBS thing I'll take a look at that oh yeah oh yeah man thank you I absolutely [Music]