Reddit Stories | I Fell Down The Stairs But My In-Laws Ignored My Cries For Help Son Was Safe...

I'm a proof reader who specializes in preparing amateur essays for spoken competition here is the corrected text I 21-year-old female have a seven-month-old son with my boyfriend my family lives abroad and are coming over to stay and help at Christmas time for now my mother-in-law Ile and father-in-law file both in their 60s named Deborah and Bob are helping me with household stuff and the baby so far we haven't had any real issues and they've been a massive help about 3 weeks ago I fell down the stairs I wasn't holding the baby and the baby was safe however instead of helping me Deborah and Bob both jumped to comfort the baby who was crying and left me at the bottom of the stairs my legs were fine but I was wobbly because of shock and asked one of them to help me up after nearly 10 whole minutes of being ignored I managed to stand up on my own and hobble through to the living room I sat down and Deborah said what's happened to you are you okay I'll admit I saw red I just said I fell down the stairs didn't you hear me calling you for help Deborah's eyes widened and she said she was too busy fussing over the baby after an hour my arm was swelling up and I was taken to the hospital luckily it was nothing serious and recovery time would be quick after my boyfriend got home and his parents left I told him I no longer want their help after today's events I can manage on my own even though it'll be hard he was taken back and said they've done a lot for us I said I appreciated it all but they ignored me crying and calling them for 10 minutes after I fell down the stairs they don't care about me only the baby and I was embarrassed I didn't see it sooner he called his parents to let them know we won't need their help anymore and his dad dad said is it about today we really didn't hear her my boyfriend just told them they're invited to Sunday roast this week and that's all I could tell he was not happy about my decision but he said he went along with it because I'm the mother fast forward to Sunday and my brother-in-law BL and sister-in-law seal are guests as well sister-in-law has a three-year-old and is totally on my side but brother-in-law is not he told me to be grateful for his parents support as they significantly more well off than my parents are and paid for many newborn infant expenses and plan to pay for many more as the baby grows since then Deborah keeps calling asking if we need any help and says she feels awful not seeing the both of you and that she misses the baby am I the idiot for not wanting them helping me in my day-to-day life edit was the baby crying loudly enough that there is a possibility they didn't hear you no way the baby stopped crying after 10 seconds and the stairs are like 2 m from the living room there is absolutely zero way they couldn't have heard me one screamers I fell too the general noise of someone falling including books falling and wall plates breaking three me crying and shouting for help I fell at the top of the stairs and fell all the way down this wasn't a Mist step and a bum Shuffle down that hurt my pelvic bone I fully fell down the stairs and cracked the banister no way they didn't hear the baby also started crying after the initial smack after I hit the ground now here are the comments comment one not the idiot you're the only one who knows the layout of your home the time frame of the crying and the noise and how everyone reacted I can't imagine that upon hearing thumps and screams they would rush to a baby who is fine and for the for the next 10 minutes they didn't bother to call out for you or to investigate where the noise came from while they may not have intentionally ignored you they displayed a lack of care for you and weirdly for themselves if I hear a big noise I'm looking around and I'm certainly yelling out for anyone else who would be home both to make sure they are okay but also to make sure we aren't being robbed or something is wrong my dad drops a pot on the floor once a day and we still all yell you okay even though we know exactly what the man did and you know what it doesn't matter if they want to help or if they have given you a ton of money and stuff you are going no contact with them and you aren't keeping them from the baby you just don't want them around every day your feelings are hurt and you don't want to rely on them in the same way I might agree with your brother-in-law if you were fully not speaking to them but you are just scaling back their involvement and that's fine comment too baby's cries are high pitched a tumble down the stairs is a lot of ruckus an adult human cries at a much lower register than a baby I'm pointing this out because if they are trying to say that my hearing isn't what it used to be then that is not a good argument the first thing to go is hearing at the higher registers meaning if anything it would have been the baby's cries that they couldn't hear but if we ignore that then let's see what the situation is they heard the baby crying presumably you heard the baby cry if I'm at someone's house and their baby cries I wonder why isn't mom dad taking care of this baby after I've checked to make sure the baby is okay I go to check out why the parent didn't come where are you are you ignoring your baby do you need help were you in the bathroom did you fall down the stairs no matter what way you look at it there's something fishy about this situation not the idiot comment three not the idiot from what you described there's no way they didn't hear you fall they deliberately chose to ignore you lying there possibly seriously hurt and they are lying about it they didn't help you at all until you managed to get yourself to a place that they could no longer ignore you in turn you cannot ignore Behavior like that you just can't what if you punctured a lung or passed out from a serious concussion what if you died because they couldn't be bothered to investigate you better off without that kind of help I'm a gust that your husband didn't rip the meat your new one now for the next story my brother has a 10-year-old son he's no longer with his son's mom and for the last four years he has been married to his wife cat my brother and Cat started dating not long after my nephew started school at first my nephew seemed to really get along well with cat and was happy about her presence but after a few months during their engagement I noticed he was more withdrawn and less enthusiastic about cat and his dad and the wedding my parents noticed this as well we asked him if everything was okay and he Shrugged it off my parents brought it up to my brother that they noticed a change and he said things were normal at home and nothing had changed so it was likely something else and he'd say something when he wanted to talk four years on and things still felt off there was always something and we were never sure what it was my nephew never said anything either then a couple of weeks ago my brother mentioned that my nephew was grounded indefinitely at his house and that his ex was refusing to back him up on it we asked what happened and he said that my nephew had not been acknowledging the presence of cat in school at all what started it off with my brother was an assignment where he had to write about his family he talked about having two homes how he lived with his mom maternal grandparents and his uncle aunt and cousins in one home and he lived with his dad in the other no mention of cat living there too my brother and cat went into the school and the teacher said she hadn't realized cat was in the home and that he never mentioned her some old work was brought up where my nephew had drawn stuff for art a grade or two ago where he showed himself having two homes but didn't draw cat while he did draw all the people in the home he shared with his mom my brother confronted my nephew and told him he should have included cat in all family related writings and drawings and that it was mean of him to talk like she doesn't exist he asked why he had done it and according to my brother my nephew said he didn't want to write about her or Draw her and that was all he said so he decided he would be punished for the foreseeable future no TV video games no spending time with his friends parties Etc my parents and I were shocked by how tough my brother was being my mom ended up getting a few minutes alone with my nephew who told her that he's expected to think of cat as his other mom and say he has three parents and he doesn't like that so he found it easier to not say anything he thought he would be in less trouble my parents decided they were going to talk to my brother and tell them how wrong they felt he was in his decision I decided to join him and my brother called us all out and said we were ganging up on him like bullies and disrespecting his parenting am I the idiot now here are the comments comment one not the idiot but that conversation should not be about how he decides to discipline his kid it should be about explaining to him that disciplining him because of personal feelings will most likely make the kid blame cat for it and make it even harder for that relationship ever be something positive you cannot force a kid to love someone or talk about them the only solution I see here is to encourage cat and the kid to spend some alone time together and make him feel in time that he has cared about not just baggage he should have friends over while she is at home hard to deny her existence then to be fair it doesn't sound like she has made a huge deal of effort to integrate into the kid's life maybe it's just the lack of information in the post but if the kid would love her he wouldn't feel embarrassed to talk about her as part of the family comment two not the idiot indefinitely isolating someone from their friends and taking away entertainment because they don't view a new spouse as their family as gross and vindictive your nephew is not being allowed to have the relationship with cat he is comfortable with so I totally get just avoiding mentioning her at all especially from a 10-year-old they aren't known for great plans advocating for a kid who is being mistreated isn't bullying and being a parent isn't a shield which means you should be able to do anything to your kid without anyone being able to intervene if he wants to talk about bullies he should look at his own behavior towards his son comment three not the idiot I'm gathering from the talk your parents had that your nephew had been instructed prior to this incident right out of the gate when he was about six to consider k k as his second mom and to always say he has three parents he didn't feel that way naturally so thought not including her and needing to label her was best and then they are punishing him for that you definitely need to have a sit down in private with your brother try to get him to see that mandating titles and affection will never work and cause resentment and issues like it is right now now for the next story I 34-year-old female have a custody agreement with the dad Tim 35-year-old male of my daughter Liz 15-year-old female we never really followed it especially as she got older we all co-p parented well together with the help of Tim's then girlfriend now wife Casey 35-year-old female and my husband 32-year-old male when they had crazy schedules their daughter 12-year-old female would stay at my house and I would take her to school I spent so much time with her that she became a part of my family Tim and Casey ended their relationship for a year during which they relied on us even more Tim Works a government job and had to leave from time to time once they got back together Tim decided to move to the countryside an hour away from our city because he believed it was safer I tried to tell him it wasn't a smart move because Liz would miss out on important events and socializing opportunities a couple of years later he has missed many games and weekends and even went no contact for a month he blamed her for not responding but she showed me the texts Liz had a really stressful month with her involvement in high school clubs soccer and socializing she sometimes feels guilt tripped by Casey and Tim and believe she is a bad daughter for doing the things she would be able to do if they stayed in town she had two performances this month with two different clubs as well as soccer games and practices she was initially going to quit soccer and pursue dance but her dad pressured her to continue with soccer she is a great dancer and Performing comes naturally to her however Tim has not attended any of her performances and it is difficult to get him to attend her games he's been an inconsistent father over the past few years and I'm tired of making excuses for him I've told Liz not to feel bad for being a normal kid and that her dad's hurt feelings are his own issue because he decided to move away before I would tell her she has to go because of the court order but now I refuse to prevent her from being a normal kid just because her dad has custody so I'm by The Jerk edit to add I don't break the agreement but I don't strongly enforce it like I used to comments comment one you can't unilaterally ignore a custody agreement that will get you into legal difficulties you and Tim are free to agree on other arrangements but you can't just decide that she won't go to him this weekend without proper discussion find out what the norm is for custody arrangements for children of your daughter's age in your state and try to come to a fair agreement you have valid points about her wanting to have a social life and get a job like other kids taking her away from her friends every weekend is not ideal consider discussing other arrangements privately with Tim or go back to court to adjust the agreement considering the new circumstances of him moving away and lizz's age one weekend a month plus vacations could be a reasonable Arrangement comment too not the jerk at 15.5 years old Liz deserves to have a life with friends and school like any other teenager it doesn't make sense for her to spend every weekend away from her social life this should be her choice not something for forced upon her you are not being vindictive or spiteful comment three it is inappropriate for Tim to expect Liz to become his personal driver it seems like he's making his needs her responsibility and burden you are not the jerk now for the next story my wife and I are in our early 30s and have a 2-year-old she has a coworker who she's known for about 3 months they're on good terms but she's never met his wife and I've never met him Etc so they're very good friends at work unfortunately his father passed away and he had to go back to his home country today his wife is 5 months pregnant and scared of being alone my wife knew his dad was sick and told him yesterday that she's happy to help in any way including having her stay at our place for a couple of days his father passed away this morning and he called her asking if his wife can come over tonight to stay for a week my wife was a bit taken aback because she had honestly not expected it anyway she asked me and I said no we don't know who this person is what she's like she's 5 months pregnant we might have to take her to the doctor in the hospital and be responsible if something happens it was just weird to me and I said I wouldn't be comfortable my wife said that I'm an uncaring jerk and that we should be helping them anyway she said no to her cooworker but said she can go check on his wife from time to time so am I the jerk for saying no now here are the comments comment one not the idiot your wife definitely should have clarified boundaries When indicating what sort of help she could offer if the cooworker left his pregnant wife alone to go to the funeral Etc and your wife should have checked with you before offering your home as a place to stay for any length of time it's concerning to me that the cooworker and his 5-month pregnant wife life have zero or very little support system in place I can understand that they may be relatively new immigrants to your country I can understand that they may not have met many people yet Etc but unless they are from a teeny tiny country Andor have moved to a teeny tiny isolated area there could very well be folks of a similar background if they would be most comfortable in a culturally homogeneous setting or they could participate in various social Gatherings to meet new people Etc assuming the wife is staying at home most of the time for a while after the baby is born she will need more support than just her husband whether or not he has parental leave it is not your responsibility as a couple or your wife's responsibility as a friend to become the deao support system for everything I would frame a discussion with your wife around that issue indicating that you totally understand her desire to help this couple but clearly they need more help than either or both of you can provide comment to not the idiot my husband and I are also both in our early 30s with an 18-month-old and I asked him his opinion on what we'd do personally we'd probably take her in how ever you're 100% not the idiot for not being comfortable in taking her in you're in the right to not let in someone you don't know it's your house and you deserve to be comfortable in your house and that includes not letting someone else intrude on that comment three no idiots here the coworker asked for help and you refused there are also cultural issues at play I assume you're in the US it's also entirely possible that the coworker has no other support system outside of work friendships in the city there's no harm in helping someone you have no deep relationships with but you're not obligated to help them out if you like this video you'll probably like these two also while you're here please consider subscribing 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