BamBam Saves The Day When Kevin Hart Messes Up His Daily Routine Cold as Balls LOL Network.

and I'm introducing season s of cold as balls will you back up God got your stomach on my back holy sh man man woo the waight is over iron on C's ball go man take your R ball put on a hook AI in the building why you dressed like his aspin you got you got a hoodie and a t-shirt under that it's like a neighborhood pool where he do I know that move there you go we just sitting on the back world oh my God are we in for a tree ladies and gentlemen what a [ __ ] episode is going to be the man the myth the legend Allan Iverson himself is here on cold as balls man first of all thank you this is a long time overdue appreciate it you were nervous you didn't want to come on cuz you thought I was going to fck with you absolutely that's what you do all the time yeah but I wasn't going to [ __ ] with you on here this about giving flowers that's what this is about my man we always go to the beginning I'm going to tell you how our worlds connect I go to George Washington High School my coach Calvin Jones is such a big Alan Iverson fan senior year he took us up to se in Hall we're watching you make the game look so easy and in that moment I realized I wasn't I said I'm not going to make it to the NBA okay in college man did you know so immediately being on that Georgetown campus did you say like you know I got the potential to be one of the best in the world absolutely you did I just needed the opportunity everything that happened to me in in high school and then with Coach giving me a second chance I wasn't going to let the game get in the way of me becoming ultimately who I am today you know I asked you that because uh you saw it but I'm going tell you who else saw it Old Spice White Hand please this episode of coldest is bought to you by gentleman's Blends holiday pack by the way this is only available for a limited amount of time through the holiday season so do yourself a favor and celebrate this holiday guys did you get it instead of saying celebrate I said smate how do I do it white hand please you know you do represent when you talk about the game of basketball significant change I'm talking about the ankle braces I'm talking about in cutting the the shirts off underneath the Jersey where did that idea of rough raw rugged and Edge come from I was just being me as far as the dress code and everything I dress like the guys from my neighborhood it was just different once I got to the NBA I could afford the stuff that we wanted growing up I remember when you're in the league this is like your your rookie year Chris rocks got the Chris Rock show you got on the black tea you got on some baggie jeans you got the the Black doag Diamond chains all over air Rings big as [ __ ] watches and Chris Rock's first words was get D he said give puffy his jewelry back oh my God he said give puffy his jewelry back at that moment it was an instant thing of damn I want to look like that and then you took it another step further the tattoos the braids are you aware that you started that thing in the game I just took the we for it for these guys to be themselves um to look like they want to look you know the the only time that I ever known about wearing suits was to go to church or to go to a funeral I never wore a suit to the basketball court you know what I mean didn't go to church that much either I did a little bit but not that much I believe in my guy though okay I believe in my guy I love him but um I just felt like after the game I'm going to Fridays and I'm going to the club or something like that I mean where am I going after the game with a suit on it all came came together be IR there was a real reason behind it these finds were very consistent right I mean they were on your ass they tried to make an example out of you the only reason I felt like um the dress code came in was because once they saw that I was wearing what I wanted to wear and I was getting away with it then other guys were like well if he can do it then I can do it too and then everybody in the league start doing it and that's when David SN said no God Rest his soul but that's when he said no well was your relationship with David Stern it wasn't a great relationship um when I did that um that terrible rap album that's when when I did that [ __ ] that's when I had a problem with David Stern and then I remember going into the office and he was reading my lyrics Kev like David Stern was actually reading 40 bars off a piece of paper and me and Theo rat I was trying not to laugh because I know how serious it was and the [ __ ] that I was saying obviously you know so to hear David Stern rapping it it was crazy you look back on it now oh my God it's so embarrassing the biggest thing is acknowledgement though it's embarrassing it's only bad if you sit on this tub and go you know I put out that fire I put that it was not a good idea it look so bad you had a lot of features though a lot of people tell you what you want to hear opposed to what you need to hear and I dealt with that we're going to take it another step man of course we got to get in the tub uh a little bit your level of [ __ ] about this man M for Seasons so come on man let's go I can't just chill right here no no you got to sit on the on the on the on the stool in there man man K I don't do this you got on [ __ ] 17 pieces of clothing what are you talking about AI came he came dressed for a real shootout like I thought it was going to help ah we got to talk Philadelphia for a second I can't talk right now well you're going to have to this this what makes the interview good this man turned our city into a place that people wanted to come when did you know that like that the city accepted you damn that's a good question I mean when did you know probably the first time that I got into some trouble the first time cuz you cuz we got a you know what I mean like there's a list yeah the first time you got a lot you did a lot of sh I mean that we got a lot of you know I thought that they were going to turn on me I was young like 21 years old I thought it was going to be a terrible backlash and it was for a couple days but um eventually it went away and that's when I knew they supported me when did you start to realize the business in the game of basketball probably when they were getting ready to trade me the first time that's when I knew it wasn't just about what I was doing on the basketball court that's when I realized it was a it was a business and they had to do what was best for the organization and me putting the black crowd over it wasn't helping we got to talk about the world of you and Larry Brown just talk to me real quick about you know those bumps I think I was like 22 23 when coach came I didn't get it at at first coach took me from just being a a good basketball player to ultimately a Hall of Famer I thought he had a problem with me but he wanted the same thing that I wanted he wanted to win and um once I realized that it was constructive criticism then that's when everything turned around for the organization and um for myself as a player mhm oh Jesus I'm sorry uh this is uh bam and Daryl got no no you got I see well this is uh I got it guys that's really good I don't think he ever wore jean shorts of that caliber but uh I get what you guys are trying to do I don't want to put it okay all right Daryl okay both of you look like two members of godamn the backst street boys you look stupid you look dumb got on a pair of goddamn Js all right let's keep it going here get the [ __ ] off of my head I've heard you talk about this moment before a moment that came off is one of the most disrespectful talking moments in the sport but you stepping over T in the interview you once said I didn't even realize what I was doing at the moment because I was so into the game did you and T ever talk about that no I was so I was a little embarrassed man was terrible that's my guy man you got to talk about your nickname uh Chuck Bubba Chuck where did the name Bubba Chuck come from I had an uncle named Bubba and I had one name Chuck and they were aing over my nickname and my mom said name of bub Chu wait they came for not being able to make a decision yeah we going to call the boy bub shut the [ __ ] up Chuck you don't know goddamn thing about no nicknames anybody calling that boy Bubba everybody going to call him Chuck that's how it happened man by the way I bet my life right now if Bubba and Chuck was to walk in this [ __ ] it look like two walking duffel bags Bubba can't walk in his mother CU he dead God damn it Bubba oh no Chuck can yeah Chuck can now that's why probably why everybody just call me Chuck prob rolling over this gra no man go ahead I know it I knew he like Chuck better the whole time terrible your interview the practice interview in that moment you're making a valid point with the media making such a big deal about this thing my thing was if anybody that has any type of sense I look at him as a player how could you become everything that I am as a basketball player if I didn't practice the biggest thing is the ignoring of the problems that that were very present at the time best friend that just got killed so you going through a lot of know what we go through all the court you had those questions every day from personal things home things friends what are you doing guys we don't need to don't need all all right all right get back that ain't bother me cuz my feet already know yeah they shouldn't be cuz you got on six pairs of socks damn shoes he got on sneaks he's got on soft sneaks okay what you doing we don't do it we're taking the benches out we're taking the benches out B go over there man piece of [ __ ] stay over there your piece of is what you are looking like a swollen Marky Mark all right got to take the benches out man white hand here you go white hand oh look at you your weak ass you can't even getn stool out when the last time you worked out never Jesus Christ get the stool out the godamn tub what are you you going to throw your back out Jesus Christ come on sit back down you got a white shorts this ain't no godamn porn that sit down oh sh hey blur that out we not selling around here not we do on here no [ __ ] my nipnip hard my chest we got to talk about your opportunity with Reebok man lifetime contract with Reebok an amazing deal at a young age what you doing man I was about to get in he stop me man you doing all right I'm getting are you still doing collabs with rebok are there anything that you're still like yeah do everything we man those are my guys we do it all man to take care of every um sport in my high school not just basketball girls and boys the biggest goal for me is to have everybody in the whole Peninsula District where I play where I3 everything rebok the best man well you know what I'm going go and am your I3 but I had a i to is my brain let's go on one moment uh that recently was put on display the redeemed team just aired on Netflix and it's highlighting the US putting a team together after the US got bronzed you were part of one of those teams was that a huge blow to you guys as a team realizing that you couldn't click the way you were supposed to obviously you think you put together a bunch of pros and we supposed to beat any team you put out there on the floor but that wasn't the case obviously that summer everything start happening overseas so me and Tim Duncan were the only ones that agreed to go wow I wanted to go but I wasn't invited and then they put together obviously the team that end up winning are you in a position to have a conversation it was out of my control okay you know what I mean and I I definitely didn't want to make a big deal about it out of respect of the guys that they did choose those were my guys you know what I mean I and I rooted for them to the end but deep down it it bothered me it it it it hurt I got to put you on the high seat for one question man as a as a point guard I would love to know Alan Iverson's Rush more point guards I look at myself as a not even as a guard you go two guard killer Stone Cold killer serial killer M give me your top five I'm going go magic Isaiah Steph and Chris Paul oh I like the list do you see the comparisons when you hear John Morant in your name I might not see it in the actual style of play but the speed the attitude the bounce J 63 yeah and can fly he remind me of myself in the church leag in the church league yeah I was jumping out the dress shoes jar is the real deal Kenny Duncan church shoes though I believe so no I saw you at high school highlight we can get ready to wrap it up so this uh let's end this by paying true homage to a move that he made famous the crossover step over by the way they banned it after you it uh all right guys let's go Daryl you're up you're playing defense and it's me and I'm going to the hoop okay do your best to stop me darl I'm going to tell you ahead of time I'm going to cross you okay matter of fact let me put my Crocs in sport move it's like the old days give me the ball what the [ __ ] is that throw a real pass man come on come on man damn it B wooo you D up all hey hey hey this like Tak a godamn ice cream from a baby boy see hey do I look like the answer this what AI used to do too hit him with that thing oh Lord oh hey this cold is ball I'm going make it do what it do when I do it baby get your ankle braces buckle up cuz when I'm on the court you better knuckle up fighting the game is how I used to Chuck look at you hold your ankle like a hey that's it come on B let roll we going to Fridays what you doing get your stupid out of here I ain't got the ball I ain't got the ball damn this is stupid let me go let me the out B I didn't got the ball over here put your dick on my guys don't say it I know I do not need to hear it you're late bro late I said don't say it you said it anyway spice why are you here anyway man oh I couldn't find an exit so I just been living here with Daryl and bamb Bam this whole time but I've been keeping clean though with some of the Old Spice products that you left I kind of lifted it myself but oh that new Old Spice dry spray that's the one that's the one that's the one guys listen I'm late because I had a lot of stuff to do first thing I do is I write down all my dreams last night I dreamt that I was a majestic Eagle my name was Carl but you know after that I mean look wake up 5:00 a.m. sharp check do that brush my teeth oh after I've done that well I got to put on that new Old Spice dry spray oh my God I have a check with that I didn't check that oh my goodness what what's going on B is it you sankk bro oh I can't start new season of C balls like this help me bam is it bad it's bad bad come on bam now first of all that's not helping nobody oh that's what it's about right C it's a little fitt it come on man hit me off okay that's what I'm talking about got that yeah that's that new Old Spice dry spray yeah ridiculously long Las Sweat Protection never see that baby it's like a glove I'm back let's go we got a big day today real big [Music] day got some spice huh not keeping that why not old place new dry spray this is M thank you it looks good bam can't just let me get that new old that's what he look like that's exactly what he look like check this out he thought he had I'm taking Mariah to Disneyland [Music] y'all make some noise for little Kevin har I'm not coming out Kev I'm not coming out to you introduce me right the contract says give me a proper introduction you got on don't worry about I got on you can kiss my ass introduce me right Nick Kevin they already heard I introduced you I don't care what they heard introduce me right ladies and gentlemen give it up for the most successful comedian since Eddie [Applause] Murphy he's here from his new special it's called Let Me Explain I don't care who you got this here my show who you going to bring out that's going to stunt harder than me hey yo I said hey yo [Applause] it just got real brother just got real it just that real hey it's going to be a long day for y'all brother it's going to be a long day tell Conceited the one thing he shouldn't be conceited about is the way his body look in that tank [Applause] top hey guys if Flo rder and Nelly lost weight they would look like Nick [Applause] you got it y'all got it you got the rappers you got The Comedians and like always y took up all the time so what so what this ain't your show this is my it's our show this our show our show it's our show we took this show on turn your back on him turn your back on him FB turn your back on him hate you wild out now here's the thing Nick I went and took it upon myself to go invent my own wilding out t-shirt okay Nick you try to put me in this cheap ass t-shirt and just put K Hart on the back like the rest of these people I'm better than them okay I'm sorry that didn't come out right I'm sorry we're we're together we're together I mean y'all you going to beat my ass I'm going beat you today black Squad all day baby well since you are the hater I got the perfect game for you but we got to go to damn commercial break cuz you don't waste it all the damn time that's what I'm supposed to do it's called hate on it oh well that's hate on your hairstyle cuz I don't like it let's hate on it I don't like it at all one bit and I hate your shirt you look like the Tin man I hate it let's start hating let's go we going to hate some more after this damn commercial break than now I know we were going somewhere with this whole post-apocalyptic we grimy we raw spikes you got on safety pins and sequence this really what you wore out here yes I got on the real two chains like this what are you talking about what look at you like a gladiator what are you talking about who are you you look like a Jango action figure you look like you you look like you play football only in jail no watch out watch no no no no no no [Applause] no when I come I come correct at the end of the day I'm looking at a bunch of clowns that look like bounce checks I'm looking at a CR when I see y'all it's like glass I can see straight through [Music] be Nick Canon a yo who the hell wants to beat Nick Cannon like like why why would I want to marry Mariah Cary and and sleep on some soft silk sheets that smell like roses and and Phil Mariah's hair oh my God why do I want to make so much money and and and literally get a check from everybody why do I love white girls girls I don't know who wants hair that's not really hair but it's a Gumby but nobody wears it I don't know we going to come back and play little game that involves a female so are you you good with the ladies am I good with the ladies am I good with the ladies why don't you just ask [Applause] Mariah pull him back back hold back hold no he noty n it's all cool it's cool it's cool you know you that your wife divorced you [Applause] right no no no don't talk about my personal life you just talk about my wife it's two different things don't you bring my personal personal is personal Kevin excuse me I'm Kevin [Applause] Hart let's talk about ladies and gentlemen hold up all right somebody put me out cuz I'm on fire here we go and and background I'm talking taekwan do jiujitsu other stuff finally God damn by myself [Music] [Laughter] mosquito that's what you get you laugh at me you die Douglas efim Benin laser manim Harris Douglas Efron bin mahim I'm sorry Harris okay just really give it a good do good I put my hands on your [ __ ] tie yeah okay see see now we just buy me a bag of La potato chips and eat every last one of them yeah that's what that's that's well just [ __ ] on me and don't leave any toilet paper is that what this is are you the big dog yeah I'm the big dog don't be a little [ __ ] I'm the big dog how big how big [Laughter] want know what I do when I walk to my job I duck cuz it's a big ass inflatable gorilla holding a banana that's getting blown all over the place that's right don't nobody here to watch eyes except me I'm the only season one holder Douglas Ean Ben laser manim Harris that was so good too I'm sorry don't I got it guys I know I got it Douglas Ephraim bin manim manim okay Douglas Ephraim bin manim Harris I haded that [Music] t um this is PornHub [Music] you're my best friend you're my it's the best day of my life I don't care How It Ends I want to give you a hug but you still got your dick in your hand push it to the side cross cross I got it using everything I have I'm sorry I got it 127 just from that what don't worry I know this guy and he won't even know that he's committing treason until he doesn't [ __ ] there was one time where uh the condom popped cuz I put my ball nobody cares about your little pee PE there was a situation with this girl named dirty Jane but at this time I wasn't uh Douglas Efraim Ben laser manim Harris take Gretchen Palmer to be a come on man you know how hard this the hell out of here man yo yo George what's up with you man with the Titus rap game on what's good with you b h what's good with you be what's really good baby huh what's good with you man it's called Soul gazing stare into my soul and I'll stare into yours come here you are not my wife oh that's it it's all about the man on the grill I think I'm in the right hand cuz you look like you know what your [ __ ] godamn it all right I don't like it in the ass of you hey man what you doing hey man relax I'm just getting some [Applause] nuts I'm going to I promise you on everything let keep on keep on it's for real this is for real guys yeah I'm sorry guys I'm nervous was that for real yes it was all right all right I can smell Kevin's fot so can I it's not you can't smell it oh my God all we got to do is get in the car he switched it up oh oh I want the other guy back I got to wait for six more people to come that's it one more I got it one more I can't do this I'm not oh my God [ __ ] had it my aunt dresses up her cats okay now you can't keep the secret cuz you just okay you're you're in like a gay thesaurus and I'm I'm I'm in a regular talking not not that anything is wrong with this thesaurus want to see a g thesaurus client arm there I found that out cuz Dash told me and her dad called me a [ __ ] shut up Sunny we're not doing this right now [ __ ] scared me scared the [ __ ] out of me away leave like that we give it one more night just one more night and you never say what you to me baby I listen to me hurry up hurry up but we are all dead this is going to be it this is it you hurry up and fix that hel I said stop hitting me I I like who you are I like who you are I I got you I got you do the look fing we're professionals come that's what we do come on baby you ready I'm going to hit I told you [ __ ] box is ready got that in wa song Ready For You player I don't like their group too sassy you kid I love you say as close as going to get Dave I love you I'm not going to do it yo come on man he's trying $400 he's trying to kiss me for real F $400 he's trying to kiss me for real y'all Kev get right in there Kev come on let's go come on let's go the [ __ ] come on looks like you're coming in I'm trying to We Can't both come [Music] in you remember Robbie weird dick from uh from high school no the guy who went to the prom with Mrs Herbert The Librarian remember the the guy that brought his dog to the prom the guy who took his pair of the prom the guy that used to eat the hamburgers out of the trash the guy that used to wear his boxers with the hole in the back the guy who believed that men could pee out their butt the guy to tried to sell dental flaws to everybody in the cafeteria the guy believed the men could get pregnant if they held but if I could but if I could just take maybe this weekend I can do the guy that got raped by our science teacher remember Mr McMahon had that big case the guy who used to brush his teeth in the water fountain the boy with the breast the the boy with the bad Boon ass no remember that day he accidentally showed his ass in gym class it was real red they caught him baboon ass you almost killed us Eddie what are you talking about we F damn W oh Edie Ed oh no oh no oh God Jesus Christ you are a terrible dver how do I get your attention make a bird call does that sound like a bird to you huh I not do mom did I did I eat all the milk cuz he didn't get any nutrients she just shut up did I drink the milk too fast like sorry come here come on man come on that's all I'm done I'm done it's out come on man it's so awkward my man you better back the [ __ ] up back the [ __ ] up before before I give you these fists fish damn mackerel who does that I don't know him from a can of paint we're part of Out of the Closet don't you understand we're not out I Calvin me human communicate big man no play no I am Kevin Hart aka Mr comedic Rockstar cold as balls is on the way the tub is colder and my balls bigger too look I got two big balls oh what's up keev how are you man good good to see you again good to see you yes sir that's right take your flipflops off going be coming around here and getting the T first ice bath for me I don't know how many I've taken at this point all right it doesn't matter how many you take you don't get used to come on here we go come on man I hit you with my my good trunk yeah impressive welcome to all new episode of cold as balls and I'm with Bubba Wallace right now what's up NASCAR racer the black NASCAR racer the only right now at the level don't forget it no no no they can't you can't forget it you don't forget it well I there's no way I'm going to forget all right how long have you been racing cars man 15 years 15 years yes started when I was 9 years old what and which is late you want to start when you're like five or six M uh go-karts and then you work up to the bigger cars faster cars and then about four I was kind of been a fullsize stock car I race on oval so you'd have to go to AAL Place stop don't just speed by that stuff you can't say you race on oval and just haul ass by it well that's all I do is haul yeah well I know you haul ass but you got to stop and make me understand when you say oval oval oval yeah oval oval oval okay I got what is that it's not a circle we actually go straight we have straightaways oh you talking about the O the that oval talking about that oval yes that I thought you were talking about oal oh yeah no it's classic mix though I get that all the time though so you're not the only one got it I just had a crash yesterday a big crash little crash there's no such thing as a little crash I'm okay if it was a big crash I wouldn't be okay that's not true you know I do my own stunts and movies oh is that right so I know all about crashes I don't know if you've seen a little movie called Ride Along is that the one where you play The Rock's child no is this a family sport like is it something that your your your mom or dad were into into it it was a family friend of ours he invited us out to come watch him on weekend and we got hooked just by watching is Taladega kns your favorite movie hell no what worst movie ever are you serious worst movie ever what about when you get an accident and you only want to drive at 15 mil per hour never happens what about the part when they put the cheetah in the back of the car to help him come over his fair never happens never happens at all never happens let's go to the next level we going down we going down to the just going to go ahead and get in there bro what is it that you want to accomplish within the sport what history do you want to make rewind back to February the first race of the Season day 2500 our Super Bowl of our Race season like yeah yeah just like that you want to do it yes no it's not it at all man he sucking he can't even do the noise do the noise he can drive wait what the why you over here Bam Bam I'm it's it's I'll explain it to you later it's a lot let's get back to talking about that day that just super bow that's the big race day yes so fast forward to the end of the race we finish second highest finishing African-American since Scott I'm going to take the time cold T not to give you an Applause thank you I would think that another brother would clap with me there we go I I'll take it I guess I'll take it my end goal ultimate goal everybody asks me and then you hear a lot of drivers say you know win championships win every race that's great I want to do all that but I want to be in Hall of Fame oo I'm going to go straight there what do you listen to while you in your car man no music they don't let you listen to music is that a choice not really allowed yeah that that's what I say if I was in there I be listening to Tupac All Eyes On Me Right if you could listen to something what would you listen to are you in the car Tupac's not a bad choice it's not a bad choice not a bad choice at all or salt and pepper push it [Music] oh what you doing what are you doing you taking this brother way too serious stop it stop it now who do you hate in NASCAR but we don't hate each other why there never any good NASCAR fights we're not allowed you got to learn how to do good road rage moves so let's just act like we're driving is that is that how you look when I am I am like this I'm a little more you're a little too tense but okay all right and I turn I see you brow your window down hey what's that I just wanted to tell you man that this year is going to be great for you huh that's one of those how you like your crew I love my crew so we we can win races and lose races on and off Pit Road okay so pit stops are 13 to 14 seconds hey hey it's your pit crew just got no get hey B don't shush me get your hands off of me what's going on it's pit crew Bubba I'm sorry about that your crew has to want to work with you yes 13 14 15 seconds stops they have to change all four tires put fuel in it give me some adjustments in 13 seconds and roll what's the slowest you've ever been in oh we've been in the 20 second bro what yeah oh 20 seconds somebody got to get fired oh and they did I fired the [ __ ] out of y'all did you have a snap on your crew yeah but I kind of feel bad when I hey y'all suck is that a bubble wall it's snapping right there that's the nice version give me the the bad version we just pulled in [Music] no no no no no godamn it what are we waiting on oh no Joey Joey drop the ball again let's take the stool out like they're taking the tire off yeah all right yeah you're right here comes the seat White Hand take that for me there you go white hand thank you white hand let me give you my stool white hand thank you buddy that's not thanks why here stool it's definitely a stool now let's go to day Tony 500 for a second all right that's 500 laps no that's 8 3,000 laps sure when you're in the car you're doing that many laps Bubba what are you talking to yourself about what are you saying well you you not saying that oh at times yeah you relax you're that relaxed yeah you got to be that's not how I imagined it at all I thought this you guys were the whole time there's some RAC tracks that are that rough don't pass out over there man do you guys have like a bag we just go I have I never had yes drivers just go wait a minute hold on what in the nasty ass just happened that's why them cars smell like [ __ ] in the inside cuz they in there pooping all over the goddamn place that's right have you ever seen a driver get out with SH in this suit I've heard about it I've never seen it what yeah he won the race who was he Tony Stewart back in I don't know what year it was oh Tony dingleberry Stewart Jesus how do you do the Trophy presentation if you got all in the back of your suit that's a good question we should asked Tony oh God so you've been asking a lot about me so let's uh switch gears here let's shift to Fourth there you go and uh see if you know anything about me okay how old was I when I got my driver's license 16 nope I say 16 you said 16 I'm thinking I'm thinking about the movie 16 Candles hold on wait wait wait wait wait wait hey hey wait a God damn it bab what the did you almost hurt yourself Bam Bam I'mma Be honest with you I don't want to see you get hurt if anybody's going to get hurt around here it should be darl you should have slip it should have been you 17 I failed the computer test once you would who's my favorite musician G Brooks Drake man Drake so back to Daytona what was my top speed in the practice round because I follow you I know this it was a one96 what you doing no no no no no no no come on Daryl's got to stick together go put some more ice in that t that was perfect Bam Bam easy killer NASCAR we always go left Bam Bam pick the left bab we ain't got the time for you to be making decisions this ain't math see I trust oh God oh God oh my God all right Bam Bam you're fired you he treats his crew you off my turn ready all right if you could pick a pit member between Bam Bam and and Daryl who would it be you took too long I got Bam Bam okay all right we should be sitting in the tub for this no no no we are you ready you're sitting right now now look we just going to race to close it out okay all right all you got to do is Follow My Lead when I tell you I need you just give me a couple of like little torque and hit the Nitro button so um we don't have nitrous and we don't have torque so they're going to lose all right here we go Get Ready Get Ready bab Nitro Nitro Nitro door the door what the are you doing bab bab get off me stop it that doesn't help winners bab stop yeah woo how you feel should feel like losers huh got there it is you got to be you proud of yourself b b how's that feel bab man come here for a second I said flick the switch give me some torque and say Nitro button instead you let them say something first cuz you got freak [ __ ] on your mind way to go buddy sleep with that tonight whatever little goddamn thing you got going on rubbing black men on the shoulders let's go let's go let's go go hey hey what's up what's going on what you doing here hey what's up K hey man what the hell Bam Bam Bam Bam was just training me to be the new ice guy coldest balls you know I figured you had to hire me considering that you stole my idea get out what are you talking about stole your idea I did no such thing Dion Cole Cole ass balls I don't think it was me Dion what are you talking about look at what dress me you gave me this yeah this is an outlandish coincidence you know what are you doing aren't you the new Old Spice Guy shouldn't you be doing that stuff yes I am Old Spice Swagger the number one recommended Oda fighter don't you talking to my close-up cameras like that stop it stop it get off of him get on me look what you did you done knocked it all out of whack that's not that's too high come a little low here we go right there now let me ask you a question where did you find your confidence oh man guess we got to go back to when I was one uh I took my first steps okay I guess it was division one coaches all around me and they're like that's going to be the next Hershel Walker wow what's the truth though the truth is I'm just a beautiful guy that takes care of himself okay I eat right I go to the gym and I wear Old Spice Swagger o spice Swagger the number one recommended odor fighter he you said that I I heard you when you said it yeah but the thing is is that I say that because I get paid every time that I say the number one recommended oif fighter oh if I hadn't known that I would have said Old Spice Swagger the number one one one one why you doing your own Echo older fighter uh it doesn't work when when you say it so I'm not getting checks for that no but you smell great and you got confidence to Bo probably won't work anyway we both too goodl looking that's why right now it works cuz I'm the only good-looking guy I mean everybody else around here is in bad [ __ ] absolutely yeah yeah and you know what I think you're right think I need to put this whole ice boy thing aside and just really concentrate on my doctorine in iology that's not real well if it's not real why am I 30,000 in debt to coldest balls University b b do I own that what he said you said coldest balls University yes that's a real thing we got t-shirts too guys getting one of the cab shirts or hoodies have you heard our song yet coldest balls University that's it C boss university did you go to the school yeah you got to finish it strong at the end cold as balls University cold as balls University there you go that's great I'm at the drive-thru right I want a Big Mac meal I haven't had a Big Mac in the longest time I'm so excited for this [ __ ] big mac oh my God I can't wait to get this Big Mac I get the Big Mac I'm so excited I pull over in a McDonald's parking lot I start [ __ ] the Big Mac up smashing it all over my face everything I'm happy as hell I turned to my left it's a woman outside the window taping me she said got your ass he nervous what the [ __ ] is you doing lady she said M but I got your ass what the [ __ ] you mean got my ass what am I doing I'm so nervous I dropped the burger I just dropped the [ __ ] Burger I grabbed my phone I went to Twitter I issued an apology via social media I said I'm sorry I'm sorry the reason why I apologize is because two days earlier I announced that I was going plant Bas full time I just said it the video was detrimental to everything that I stood for at the moment had to issue an apology to the plant-based Community became an ally made a donation was a part of protest I had to do what I could stood by the side of ows took pictures it was a lot shit's getting aggressive shit's getting more aggressive fast food is getting more aggressive fast food used to be just a decision you make now they getting aggressive and we got to know when to draw the line Taco Bell done started trying to trap [Applause] [ __ ] I got to go all around the country warning my people to beware Taco Bell is trying to trap [ __ ] yes they made a taco out of chicken meat yeah trying to trap [ __ ] in there we got to draw the line no Taco Bell no we don't stop them now they'll have chitlin chimy chongas and hog M nachos no we don't want no cornbread churo make them regular my wife says the same thing all the time once again Kevin you're getting older getting angry irritable I'm here to tell you I am getting older 41 now guy no right where does time go I was just 22 years old man you do not realize how fast time flies when you look back at all those comedy specials on the wall that's a timeline my [ __ ] life that's damn near 16 years of Comedy man 16 [ __ ] years of Comedy like it's insane 41 what happened [ __ ] changes at the age 40 you hear about it but you don't believe it things do change I'm here to tell you [ __ ] does change biggest change for me after the age 40 my balls dropped I got some length got some [ __ ] length on my balls I didn't ask for it just happened I didn't even know I was in the kitchen bent over to pick something up my wife was like why you got dice in your back pocket I ain't got no [ __ ] dice in my back pocket touch my back pocket oh it's my balls God damn I got that's my [ __ ] balls how my balls get in my back pocket what the [ __ ] just happened to me how long was I sleep you stretched me out while I was asleep the biggest thing for me is how content I am at this age man I am okay I'm very serious man I am okay I don't need to do much I love being in the [ __ ] house I actually built the house I thought me and my wife built the house because that's where we wanted to stay we wanted to stay in this [ __ ] house let's build our dream house to stay in it not to leave it women got a problem with doing this thing called sitting the [ __ ] down it's it's very difficult for women to sit the [ __ ] down sit the [ __ ] down it's a task for women a woman's favorite line let's go do some stuff what stuff M something the [ __ ] are you saying something a bunch of men that's a bunch of men rejoicing yeah yeah something I don't know something you know my wife's biggest problem is chasing her past trying to redo what she did when she was younger ladies I'm here to give you a personal message it's okay to get old there's nothing wrong with getting old there's nothing wrong with it stop fighting old age the beauty of getting older is that you get to look back and realize all the dope [ __ ] that you overcame and that you did when you were younger that's dope stop trying to run from that stop trying to redo that it's over it's [ __ ] over she told me the other day she was like babe we should go out tonight we should get [ __ ] up I said absolutely not no why would I do that no it hurts it [ __ ] hurts now take a shot and get stuck in my chest for 3 to five [ __ ] minutes my left side shut down like I get to shaking and [ __ ] I got to fart or [ __ ] I don't know it's one of them something's happening making dumb ass faces I described this to my wife in great detail you know what her answer was you don't never want to have fun with me [ __ ] I just described a stroke to you that's a stroke that's a legal stroke I'm shutting down you don't want to have fun with me you don't never want to do stuff [ __ ] up my last young day was last Christmas played basketball somebody's backyard got fouled ran into a wall damn near killed myself and I thought I had saved myself cuz I saved my face with my arm I save my face with my arm but when my arm hit the ground that [ __ ] sound like Transformers it said my brain said get the [ __ ] up off the ground [ __ ] my arm said if you get us up off the ground you going to have to put us in your pocket [ __ ] cuz we are done I got right up off the ground and went right to the hospital now white people I know that don't sound amazing if you get hurt you supposed to go to the hospital but as a [ __ ] if you get up off the ground and go directly to the hospital that mean you thought you was F to die that day I was in the hospital looking at the doctor in the eye I was holding my arm like a baby I said I don't know what you f to do but every time I blink it feels like somebody's tearing my arm out the socket he said don't worry I'm going put you on some medication I said wait a minute with all due respect I've been smoking the best weed in the country and medication is not you do your job let me do my job he wrote me out two prescriptions one for traod doll and one for peret I know know if y'all done had them separately but if you take them [ __ ] together it'll make you a superhero in this [ __ ] you walking around looking for small crimes saying [ __ ] no [ __ ] has ever said before shoot me right in the chest shoot me right in the chest I ain't even going to feel it I can't feel [ __ ] but you have to be careful your doctors give you all that strong ass [ __ ] medication they don't tell you what the [ __ ] it's going to do when they all get together you don't believe that ask Tiger Woods tiger was in the police department looking like a baby giraffe and [ __ ] [Applause] that's one two three 4 five strong ass medication you know I is what makes me laugh hearing other people talk about sex that's enough for me hearing other people talk about sex is the funniest [ __ ] in the world funniest people to listen to Talk About Sex are my nephews my nephews are 21 22 years old It's the funniest [ __ ] that you will ever hear man it's the funniest [ __ ] you'll ever hear but they don't they don't offer the information you got to baited out of them you got to set a trap see if they fall for it I set the Trap they fall in it every time I just come in the room hot y'all ain't [ __ ] yet they take de baate every time who ain't [ __ ] every time who ain't [ __ ] I know you ain't saying me I know you ain't saying I ain't [ __ ] I'm [ __ ] I know you ain't say me go ahead huh you ain't [ __ ] [ __ ] I know your young ass ain't [ __ ] I'm [ __ ] what you doing tell me what you doing in no I ain't telling you cuz if I tell you you going to try to put it in one of your little comedy shows I [ __ ] talking about you shut up the hell I'mma put you in my comedy show for I got jokes I don't need you what you doing give me the nastiest thing that you've done no judging no judging [ __ ] I'mma judge you for all right nastiest thing I've done I went to the movies with this girl we go to the movies she told me get a large bucket of popcorn I get the bucket of popcorn I sit down she cut a hole in the bottom told me put my dick through the hole she gave me a butter beat off I said what the [ __ ] I caught myself I had to act like I knew what it was a butter beat off I know that's right a butter beat off you know you older cuz you ask the wrong questions [ __ ] y'all get a large for why you waste all that popcorn you just got the small it's a 12 $14 difference ain't it why you get that that butter don't get in your ho that's like an infection waiting to happen that's how you catch the vid you going to get the vid get the vid 19 doing that [ __ ] putting the butter in your hole I don't want the butter in your hole I ran home told my wife you ain't going to believe this [ __ ] I was talking to Terence Terence told me these kids out here are giving each other butter beat offs she said they still doing that I said what the [ __ ] is happening here who are you I don't even want to know no more you just stop right there my kids better not be doing it I know that much if I find out my kids doing it I have a goddamn fit can't just come out and ask your kids though you got to once again got to set the Trap see if they step in it we had dinner eating a good dinner at the house nice dinner I throw the question out to my wife babe we should go to the movies maybe you can give me a butter beat off I look right at my [ __ ] daughter right at my daughter staring at her ass she didn't bun she was cool as a fan eating the food and [ __ ] I'd never been more proud as a father thank you God thank you God she don't even know what the [ __ ] it is thank you God turn this way my son was like oh yeah he said yeah you better get the large dad you don't want that butter in a hole you'll catch the vid again you don't want it twice you don't want backto back cases of the vid dad but I didn't bring up Viagra to talk to the men I brought up Viagra I've been talking about it for two years it's finally happening this year 2018 they going to be selling it it's going to change everything they are finally F to sell female Viagra did you hear that that wasn't women that was old vaginas waking up for the first time tonight what did that niggaer say she ain't gave that [ __ ] away since the prohibition that's fresh she got cobwebs on it and everything is fresh Saran Wrap that's right ladies female Viagra is coming it's going to change everything [ __ ] game is already vicious wait till this old kitty cat get back on the market they say the they say the female Viagra is stronger than the male yeah they say even if you 62 it'll bring you back to when you was at your hottest look at the [Applause] cougar that's going to change the game right now these young girls is running things but you wait till that old classic get out men know it ain't but two types of [ __ ] the old classic [ __ ] and The New Classic that old classic is a classic for a reason it's got his own young girl you just get into the bed and start [ __ ] not that old classic up you got to warm up that engine first you got to Prim in that engine [Applause] you had to grab that [ __ ] by the nipples and sh had keep checking the fluids she ain't ready yet she is not ready you going to know when she ready too cuz she going to crank up like this [ __ ] got a 450 under there this is a real classic right ha [Applause] it that's that old classic young girl want to come all night long not that old classic she just want to come one time she want to come hard as hell she wanted to shake the Room [Applause] boo she ain't got time to be [ __ ] all night long she got [ __ ] in the crock pot she got to look after sh I st these at 3:00 and at 700 like clockwork I never miss it that that's that old classic she don't want to come but one time but it ain't going to be easy hold up you have to be ready to do 49 to 52 minutes of hard work you going to have to use hard dick and creativity cuz she can't move this hip and this knee you might have to [ __ ] that [ __ ] in a rocking CH [Applause] up can you feel that me m that's that old classic just saying do more [ __ ] some of you women right now are lucky you are sitting right now with a man with great dick don't don't make no noise y'all know how these Jacksonville hoes is soon as y'all make some noise that [ __ ] look like vultures [Applause]