[Music] [Applause] today is my overnight dat with Jen and I'm there I love her and I told her that I've put everything out on the table for her she knows where I stand but you know as much as I want to believe it's me I don't know and she hasn't told me that by any means so that's a big question mark in my head just because I haven't had that reassurance I know Jen's falling in love with me but I really want to hear that she loves me too and not the day before I get down on a knee or anything like that I want to know so that I can build on that I don't really know what Jen's got in store but every date that Jen and I have been on has been an absolute blast so I know Jen's excited to see me and I'm just excited to see her hey you what's up baby girl how are you I'm good how are you oh you look fantastic oh my God missed you I missed you all right so what do we have in store today today we are going to see the beautiful island of Hawaii from up above in this little guy right here I love that I love that we're going to see it all from up above I can't wait let's do come on okay Deon is someone who just makes me so happy all the time and so today is a really big day for us and I'm excited Devon and I are going to have a once in a-lifetime experience and be able to really see Hawaii for what it is I could see Deon and I doing this in the future coming to a beautiful island like this with our own kids look at this view so pretty I'm close to being in love with Devon and I hope that today is a day that can help us get there Devon's given me this feeling of love and support that I haven't had my entire life or in a relationship so the biggest concern is that I could sell sabotage with because I don't know how to navigate these feelings of having somebody just be there for me unwaveringly it's crazy how blue the water is crazy is how blue your eyes are wow not blue not blue at all being in this helicopter at Devon and just being ourselves and just being able to joke around it just feels right rainbow you can see the end of it right here I'm speechless absolutely stunning Dev makes me feel loved and just supported he is someone who's consistent with me and knows what he wants and he's not been afraid to express it or show it this is a dream it's so beautiful I couldn't have ask for more beautiful view with a more beautiful woman yeah yeah yeah yeah corny okay I love it Devon is someone who's so fun to be around all the time and for him to really break down his walls with me makes me feel like this is something really special he is just a good thing that I've been wanting for a long time and it's all about allowing myself to accept [Music] that oh wow my God look at that isn't that beautiful what the hell I can't believe that beautiful I've never felt any type of way about a woman like I feel about Jen I feel it in my bones that I'm the guy for Jen how we interact when we're together it just makes us feel like it's just us two in the world and nobody else I know that she still got probably some figuring things out to do but she's a person that I see the end with and I told her I love her and I'm looking forward to the possibility to get down on one knee with Jin def I just having an amazing day together and to be able to share these beautiful Scenic moments it just means so much to me it's just making me feel like I'm with Devon for a reason and it just feels right with him I want to be in love with Devon and I think I'm really close to that and just having these moments really get that alone time and get that validation just proves even more that he really does understand me and know me and see me it's getting easier and easier to really fall into my feelings for kin I had a really good time meeting your family it was so nice to meet your mom finally and it was nice to see her validate our relationship I love that yeah for them to be so open to you and open to me and open to us was just what I needed yeah I am looking forward to what comes next mhm you know it's not so much for me about the magic of this I don't want that to take away from us us working on each other you know and and that's the big thing you know it's the real world that makes me happy and I want to bring you into that real world and do normal things like go to the movies or go see a concert or go to the park you know it's not so much for me about the big things it's always been about acclimating to normal life and and being happy we can be extraord people in a normal world you know what I mean you have no idea how much like I want to get back to work and like live my life and eventually buy a house and raise some kids because I've never had like a normal family life so the extraordinary thing for me is to have a normal family life like that's just all I want Devin doesn't shy away from talking about an engagement at the end of this he's there he's ready for it and as as much as I am ready for engagement it is scary to lean into these feelings for ding because I think I just need a littleit of time for my feelings to catch up to my head so I'm really just trying to be cautious with it we've done very well I think you and I of having such fantastic moments together and becoming so close in such a short amount of time yeah it's all crazy it all doesn't make sense to it makes a little bit of sense doesn't it yeah that's why I said I loved you cuz it made sense to me and I still feel that way absolutely yeah for me like I know why I love you and it's because you make me feel so secure in my own skin in a way that I've never been able to feel before I am so excited to hear you say all that means so much to [Music] me and sometimes it's hard for me to accept a good thing when I see it I know you're a good thing and it's like scary for me to like lean into that fully because I know that if I lean into it all the way it's like going to be real yeah and I want to and I'm trying and I want you to know like I'm on the way there that's fine just know that I'll be there waiting for you whenever you get there I'm trying every day for out don't worry [Music] you're worth the wait you know I sat there and reiterated how much I love Jen and I never heard it back you know it's like she's done a good job of showing she cares deeply for me but I would like to hear the Big L you know I'd like to hear that back it's important to me St he's so committed to me and I have no question that he'd make a great partner at the end of this and that he really is here for me but the question is am I going to be able to get there with Devon and can I allow myself to do that with him maybe I'm hesitant to lean into my feelings for Devon because I feel like they might be too good to be truth the fear in all of this is that I won't be able to accept a good thing for what it is a good thing