Houston is Immaculate- Bayou City Boys Ep. 30

Intro a week you were not yeah i've been taking like little cat naps are you yelling at me i've been yelling at everybody today man you have been it's kind of scary shut up to eat how are y'all doing tonight what's up houston it's hot as [ __ ] it's [ __ ] miserably hot it's so hot bro i hate it so much miserably hot it's so ass anything good going around the city right now uh covey yeah it's just sinuses oh wait yeah don't start this [ __ ] yeah i know oh boy he'll lock us down again well don't say that don't say that don't say that no i don't want to get locked down again i'm kind of hungry though i knew you were going to say that i'm not going to lie i knew it i'm hungry it'd be like that it's the damn weed smoking tomato go away oh all right so what do y'all want to start off with tonight because there is all kinds of stuff going on we should go with let's go with the hot takes right now we got houston astros today we'll we'll we'll go start off mildly and then we'll go into the good stuff well uh today was a most people i'm sure didn't watch the game because they worked but yeah astros offensive woes what do y'all think is ben i guess their problem they did fall a bit we did [ __ ] good today uh we scored nine runs it i tell you what the problem is alex bregman in the three hole that and maldonado's bat in 150. here's my issue i can't be loyal to everybody yeah i can't be loyal to julie and maldonado and bregman they're both batting 218 uh bregman and yuli by that logic i have to go get wilson contreras cut castro and keep maldonado so he ain't going nowhere but we're bringing abaddon yeah you're no longer like my first option when it if i have another option well [ __ ] [ __ ] i mean it like they were talking about the defensive war today maldonado is like not as good as people think and we'll cuz wilson contreras is about as good as it gets you see that comment we just got this is what happens when you have kovid my boy josh just said astros going to the super bowl this year say what you want the stanley cup is Astros Woes ours this year this fool got covered and missed his own show that he booked the other night so i don't expect any less i mean they could go to the super bowl if they all bought tickets yeah i think it's in arizona they can buy tickets yeah but then you gotta go to arizona they actually have a nice football stadium they got real grass on their footballs they just happen to have a quarterback that don't want to be there yeah at least the astral's made history today yes what they do who pictures two immaculate innings three strikeouts on nine pitches twice damn on the same first time it's first time has ever been done twice in one day first time it's ever happened in the same game and coincidentally enough it was the same three batters damn that's what's up those three batteries have to feel like yeah the thing is i mean they kind of tie into what we're talking about is the uh the offense and the defense like even bagwell said it a lot the defense i mean the the pitching in itself has been very good but the offense has not helped them out in the games like you'll have these games where it's one zero and like 2-0-1-0 like ten on freaking bass and it's just like the problem is it's like we get people on base and everybody's swinging for the [ __ ] fences now it's like no get em over get em in get up that's how we made a dynasty get him over get him in i'm telling you bro hit a home run it's like it's like joaquin phoenix's character in signs it felt wrong not to swing he was just trying to [ __ ] shoot for the stars with every single hit yeah but everybody they're not there to do that i know that but you know they pissed me off because we went 10 games in a row in that oakland seattle that west coast trip we just we averaged 10 hits a game damn we averaged four runs again that's bad no i know i know we're very vocal on i mean on dusty especially zach a lot so he did say he's not changing the rotation if you look at like mlb network and everything he says i'm changing they need to change the rotation you know move alex bregman but are you okay with him because his comment was these guys know what they're doing i'm not gonna mess with it but i feel like at some point there is a part of coaching that yeah even if you think your players are great you need they need guidance at dartmouth which is your two it's your job as a coach to get the best out of your players when you see bregman that passive like not swinging at [ __ ] not being aggressive taking all those walks yeah the walks are good because you get on base but we need that spot to bring in runs it's your job as the coach to go tell them hey that's not what i put you there for swing that [ __ ] wood that's what she said swing that wood like your name johnny sins yeah it's a damn shame when you have somebody like you're not batting almost 500 for a month and we're not scoring runs yeah it it seems like it's i mean you just lost premiere now for at least 10 days he has a thumb injury i believe for seven which pissed me off because they called up that one guy who i can't pronounce his [ __ ] name uh machu picchu that guy and they should have brought up pedro leone my opinion yeah i mean i think they're gonna stick with a lot ms diaz and them more um but it's i'm cool with that but i'm also cool with them playing uh the kid oh um maurice mauricio um yeah he's been really good he's been i mean he's getting he's it seemed like he's him better than freaking bregman than you'll eat right now i know maldonado had a game today he had to do just enough for us to stop talking about him he had a two-run home run today he's like i wonder what would happen if he switched your sister back the same switch you lee and bregman and see what happened just just to see [ __ ] it and if it doesn't work out just switch them back it's fine for me it's like they never say if it's like just tweak some [ __ ] that's all i'm [ __ ] asking i wonder if when jake myers comes back because he's on rehab assignment if they'll consider putting him at lead off because i think i've had it back i think i'd be okay with that he swings left-handed yeah really pretty sure hold up hold up i'm confused here he does he does that hey shut up [ __ ] i have epilepsy but that don't have anything to do with you know the difference between your left and your right i a zero i met him fool i didn't know he swung left handed hey whatever way you swing is whatever you think okay then we'll do field mike third and then fourth will be what's up chris princess fellas astros astros woke up the bats today the astros actually i thought started doing better when they came back on us uh monday i think that pissed us off because tucker hit that bomb yesterday in the 8th yeah he pretty much saved the game that that one yeah i didn't watch it but i figured he did because i got on instagram and everybody was like king tuck well i mean it was everybody was talking [ __ ] i mean they've been in what looks like a slump i mean for a good while like but here's why i blame dusty for everything there's a difference when a team comes out with when some of the players come out with energy and some of them don't because that's how a team works right yeah but when the whole team comes out they're like blah i mean we talked about it last week the how the team looked with joe espada running it versus that one day versus with dusty i know dusty only has like one year on his contract left they did kind of like a tryout thing again but bro be honest let's just keep it real yeah the angels fired their coach there's like three teams that fired coaches already they're gonna come calling for a spada if dusty wins a [ __ ] ring this year you still might have to ask him to leave yeah give him a ring let him ride out on the sunset and get your you guy the the times are are changing it's kind of like we always talk about it with the nba like you can't have these old school thinking coaches with these new players that play the team has to fit and i feel with the way our team is built it's gonna need a it reminds me of like mark jackson mark jackson and steve curry type of thing yeah like mark's not a bad coach but we need something different and it's just like i think got it they need to just resign jeff bagwell i like him announcing and he can't [ __ ] throw so i like him announcing too he's pretty good announcer you know who he reminds me of me because he cut a [ __ ] off mid-sentence in a heartbeat he does he's always like oh [ __ ] chris said let's make a deal send a farmhand and yuli for miggy need a big first bat first base back well yeah that would be pretty good i think nick called for that last week yeah you say you didn't want to get rid of you lee right yeah i don't know if i can get rid of you but if that's all you got to give up for miggy look at that if julie starts eating pizza and drinking soda again like we said he gonna be unstoppable again i don't know i figured i stopped trying to figure him out i think that stupid ass hand guard he wears [ __ ] him up too it's real big and he when he's swinging he's turning his hands over just so i don't rub up on him just an observation it it's something because we've been [ __ ] up this past weekend now what our pitching please when we played uh the marlins tomorrow's [ __ ] tour him um yeah i mean we look at our sk i got our schedule up here for us boom and marlins what the [ __ ] out of us you see that schedule right there at the end of the month where we have all those games in new york yeah the question i heard on the radio today is on the 27th when we have the day off does altuve have to stay in the hotel or can he go out in new york public damn true ooh he better stay in the hotel that's what i was thinking ain't nothing i was thinking too the most player [ __ ] in the world would be the most player thing yeah the most baller thing just yeah just walk around he said no shirt though he's like i don't got a buzzer wrong i got a mic on god here's my tattoo in the world would be him to just walk around in new york like nothing but i'd much rather him not get beat up i can't wait for them games because knowing the way that fans are in new york they'll probably try and beat him up and they'd probably succeed i mean the good thing for it is new york yankees right now are probably the hottest team in baseball but i also don't want it's going to be tough because you're playing the mets here which those fans think that they're one of the great teams right now Astros Schedule Breakdown if you beat them then you go into the yankees and you play them and they already hate us for many reasons and then you go back into the new york area again it's just it's just a weird buildup i mean i feel like our team's been on the damn road so damn much like but that just means we have a lot of home games at the end which is better for us a lot of resting at home being with the fam and everything i'm cool with there i'll tell you what i don't like hi john luis garcia is here um oh john john's a mets fan i forgot he said we are one of the better teams in baseball no you're not he who says new york is the best like teams for all their sports is probably stupid i mean yankees right now are the i sadly are they i've had all their sports they are bro i still did find it funny that the 250 million dollar man got rocked last week seven hits no was it seven runs three home runs and two innings or something that doesn't count though bro like because he struck out a bunch of people in baltimore that doesn't count though bro because they still have the giants and the jets that they think are good okay i could listen to an argument for the giants being competitive the jets no they're trying the only team worth anything in new york is the bills and nobody cares because they're buffalo brooklyn the nets i was talking about and brooklyn helps the rockets out so i hope they suck then do they have a [ __ ] do they have a uh rugby team i'm sure they do i don't know but you know our rugby team is going to the playoffs as the number one seed yeah i try to win tickets on the radio today but then i got tired of waiting trust me not all teams that play in new york are great there's that team that plays in the garden i don't know who that is the team that's named after me oh yeah but the the good thing about the knicks is for one basketball is always better when the knicks are good and two if you could go be an all-star in new york you're pretty much a superstar in the league mm-hmm we know who's a superstar jeremy yeah i miss him already i'm really great that's why i need damian to go to the knicks what i want to throw this out there because and for some reason every time we talk about [ __ ] on our show [ __ ] happens yeah yeah it does do you think shio itani resigns with the angels i think shiro atani resigns or signs with the astros no we can't afford him yeah i know i was just talking [ __ ] that boy said he wants like 200 and like 50 million something i'm gonna go with no because i mean it does affect us because we've seen mike trout or most of his career and well i could tell you this bro if he goes to a team somewhere on the east coast if you if you're annoyed of him now then imagine if he wasn't met oh god hell no i'd be freaking annoyed i mean i don't it's not that if he was on the dodgers see and it's tough because like i don't i like shio itani but it's like you're the shittier team in freaking your own like city i know it's anaheim but still like you're not even the best like team in the division you're not even second like you're literally fighting for fourth right now you lost like 13. they were [ __ ] playing like kids bop or some [ __ ] to get their players [ __ ] crunk or something it's stupid i was like what the [ __ ] imagine if he signed with the dodgers we would never hear the end of it they get they have to they'd have to throw a lot of money out they're broker than us yeah they're it's going to be like a red sucks the red sox might what if there's one team like for the astros that scares me of how they're building and i think it's the blue jays because they got vladi they got springer they got freaking biggio son they got yuli's brother like that's just the name but i'm still so mad about when i went and seen the astros play a few months ago and springer on the first at bat just drilled one for a home run on us you were there no [ __ ] yup no but yeah i i if he went to like toronto i would probably be pretty pissed off if he went to the dog goes to the marlins if he went to the dodge if he went to the dodgers i'd be mad because i never have to hear the end of it rogers fans are already annoying so [Music] yeah daddy's fans are annoying what are some what is joe j code or is he coming back who cares bro i want him back already that was me he did what he did good he did good for a few games y'all were stoked about it then he got hurt you [ __ ] up but you got to think about it like this what are you going to do get pissed off verlander was already mad that he was taking too many days off so he bumped christian javier he was like no no no no i'm pitching today he pitched tomorrow he literally did that the other day so yeah i mean where is he back in that [ __ ] yeah he's not about to come out bullpen promise you that okay it's a good problem to have okay i want that okay so we push odorizie to a closer and presley you're not doing that you just didn't hear what i said if you asked order easy to go to the bullpen i guarantee you'll ask for a trade the only hope you have is to send christian out of here to the bullpen pitching too good oh i mean he's waiting for somebody to [ __ ] up and then bring over he's like he's like he's like miles from the [ __ ] uh from hardball he pitching too good what gets me mad is that there's games where like everybody's like oh these pictures suck but they only gave up three runs four runs those are the [ __ ] casual fairweather fans that don't know [ __ ] that's going on but then i look at like the pitchers and you have to critique each one on what they do and it's shitty because on technically they're doing [ __ ] phenomenal yeah to only give up three runs in a baseball game against a pro team i mean that's not bad and you had 20 [ __ ] runs sitting there that you could have won on so it's more on like the offense but when i have to figure out where to put odorizia where to put lance at later on where if you get a [ __ ] trade you take it later on like it's all these things it's like that comes down to the same kind of argument i've always had with like football fans when they don't know who to blame because they don't watch anything and they only know big names that are on the team so they blame the quarterback or they blame the coach when it wasn't either their fault because both of them were playing great but you know the team just wasn't doing good as a whole exactly it wasn't you know yeah they don't know who to look at and blame so they blame whatever they can it wasn't brock osweiler's fault it was that was his fault that was his fault he signed that deal yeah that was our fault too because we signed it to that deal we gave him that new money i had nothing to do with that i didn't have a saying give me a vote i didn't you know what i didn't text me i'm not i was against that from the minute it happened no i remember if rick smith rick smith should text me i i i heard something about it like exactly yo we got a superstar cornerstone player here hey that will punk the whole [ __ ] city he's like i'm the quarterback y'all need and we signed it and he was like ah i'm just kidding i played madden a couple times i think what happened was we called him because we gave him that contract over the phone we never met with him oh that's even more [ __ ] up and oh i think i meant to call peyton and they're like no it's you and oh [ __ ] yeah you want to pay me come on all right before we move on astros let me ask y'all what is y'alls top three astro jerseys right now like out of any player you can get who would you rank as one through three oh number one is penia number one is out two of a number two is jordan and number three would probably be verlander number one is pena because you can't find his [ __ ] nowhere right now um then it's probably my colors because huh terrible reason go on no i'm talking about like sales wise you can't find any reason mccullers probably as well because he said bear me and the h and his [ __ ] went off too and then altuve because i can still find teo mike [ __ ] and then i can find you these and [ __ ] too but those are the three that i can't find nowhere i would say carlos correa because it's probably on sale uh now i'd say artuve just because he's the og of the team still um then i would say i feel pena is going to be a star so i want it i want to get it hot off the press beforehand for me and then i will get i would say alvarez just because they paid the boy and i'll say this they're the same age so jordan really hasn't played too much more baseball in the big leagues than him yeah i think you're the star yeah you're you're not got an mvp in his career somewhere down the line if not i don't think it's gonna be this year because aaron judge playing for a contract but that boy a quarter away from uh 50 home runs but we can see it's a long season see what happens but for sure these numbers they've he's gradually gotten better and you can see the progress with him i mean he is my cousin so you know i went i went somewhere the other day and somebody had turned their uh correa jersey into a pena jersey they put duct tape on the one to make it a three and then put it over the correa name and wrote pena on it that's pretty funny it was hilarious i thought it was great ingenuity i love it for it speaking of what we're here for i got it texans mini camp started i know we've been bashing them and [ __ ] a little bit because people aren't showing but your boy laramie tunzel showed up looking escaped too boy look beast mode i was like they've been putting a lot of davis mills all over the social media platforms and this is a guy i did not expect to though i didn't expect to see this type of like here's the thing if you think if you're being completely honest as a texans fan right if you want to [ __ ] on davis mills every position except your number one receiver is in question maybe tunzel you can debate every [ __ ] position on this team maybe not bernard but you'll never hear somebody ask who the quarterback is it's davis he's the quarterback he knows it he embraced it why the [ __ ] he went and bought some cheap ass hair clippers and cut his own hair i don't know but he cut his own hair it looked like it bro he had a hat on but whatever was going like i need a haircut i get one tomorrow but his [ __ ] was like it looked bad on the side through the hat it looked like he just got back from summer vacation and was going to get his Texans Mini Camp hair cut and he but he could tell that he's a for real he's a dude he's a bro like he was doing the interview right he slapped the bug on his neck and just kept talking like it was nothing he was like blah blah blah blah [Laughter] does he look like the guy that you would go to go to the gym with and him call you broski no he looks like the man i don't want to say this is [ __ ] up uh he looks like the dude whose hair is growing back from chemo god damn oh my god i told you i didn't want to say it you didn't have to but god did okay and they've had them all over like i've seen at least like four videos hype videos of davis knows like they don't even play brandon cooks in mini camp or otas they're like ain't nobody here gonna cover him if we [ __ ] just use you all the time in mini camp we're just gonna throw to you and ain't nobody getting better so they said him now you're good bro just rest up yeah [Music] yeah well they say the titan sucks so that makes me nervous is it our tight insects it's kind of what they hinted at son of a biscuit but pharaoh brown came back in shape pretty good shape we drafted a tight end we have breven jordan so we'll see i know last week we went through like free agents i mean nobody's been signed recently it looks like everybody's going into pre-season before they make some decisions that's what pep hamilton said today it was the coolest [ __ ] ever he's like chill out let us establish an identity in preseason with what we have and you'll know what we're trying to do and i was like all right that's a good answer i like listening to him talk yo breaking news what christian wood is being traded to the dallas mavericks four i don't know yet that's my happy sandwich it happened on our show breaking news christian was out and we were just going to talk about this christian rockets trade rumors oh man bye [ __ ] zach's so stoked right now look at his face where am i goddamn i knew it i knew it so now we i was gonna go in the trade rumor that memphis was looking at getting him because they wanted to trade stuff but that's off the table now yeah what i mean if they're going to trade him to dallas uh [ __ ] i wish it would probably be somebody like uh tim hardaway they're spending the number 26 overall pick to the rockets along with multiple players multiple players what the [ __ ] so oh i hope they still bob on CHRISTIAN WOOD TRADE BREAKDOWN imagine if you're on the dallas team and you find out you're going to houston you got to be stoked out of your mind imagine if you're on houston's team you're going to dallas there's nobody happy because they just left the western conference finals yeah he's going to blow up he's going to live in dallas i feel you but he's going to go out there he's going to be like yeah this is great it's so sick it's the best place i've ever lived and inside he's crying because he's like i miss houston in the strip club i wonder what these mo i guarantee you they send us uh what's that jalen dude on their team he was a rookie last year small forward jalen something blue no jalen smith i think his name is i doubt they'll send us [Music] [ __ ] brunson i wish they would though they might send us alec burke what did you read that on uh my little app that i did and then i went onto twitter shams tweeted it out i was like why is my phone buzzing for and then i was like oh [ __ ] that's sick so i'm over here putting the news out on our facebook that's almost stuff for sure we draft paulo because apollo is the same player well and that's get us into what i was talking about wanted to talk about the rockets is there's a lot of i mean it's what nine days now i think dude dallas is [ __ ] dumb they're sending bobon manjanovic sterling brown trey burke marquis chris and the 26th pick bob we keep trey burke sterling brown and chris all get cut watched marquis chris is a fighting [ __ ] oh man what happened on the show that's what's up let me put my my tweet out real quick 26. i remember when i was 26. crazy oh we got boba i love that dude he's like seven foot [ __ ] i don't know what seven foot ten is that guy good no no he's not bad though he's very slow but why is he he played in john he did he's just so dope cool like everybody loves him like you ever seen any of those commercials with the basketball players you're in like costco no trey young i don't watch tv i just stream the same tv shows all the time nothing wrong with you i don't know i really like futurama it's my favorite show did they make trades on future no okay all right i'm done i stuffed it i sent that [ __ ] out like 40 times ass what's up oh well i'm happy christian is gone out of here thank [Music] what he got he got like cauliflower here you'll see he does he looks like he's an mma fighter a little bit um anyways so we were talking about the uh the tight end core looks bad you said yeah hang on you got that no i feel on the offense i mean the running backs they kind of look like we're we're set i don't want to say anything because i did believe in philip lindsay last year and we know how that turned out but i'm stoked with martial yeah that was all gonna say i i'm a big marlon mack fan i mean you asked me who our starter running back would be i'd have no clue it's so it's like well me and nick were talking about this at work the other day i forg it was marlon mack i think it was he said they asked him how he was how he's feeling about being a running back on the texans or something and they said how was your time over at the colts did you ever feel like you were going to start and he said nobody starts when you got done with the tailor over there that's just not how it goes you know like jonathan did you yeah he said last week ah but i'll let you claim if you told me we had a game tomorrow i would say that our starter running back is birkin but that's only because you don't know what the mother is going to do yeah i know after training camp and preseason i think it's going to be martin mack i was right about burkhead last year i'm not gonna be right about him this year no you were only right by like proxy last year i know but i was still right i said he was gonna make the team remember i said he was gonna make the team that's all it was yeah but that shouldn't even happen who the [ __ ] has that many running backs and trades all of them except for him they didn't trade uh they didn't trade what's his [ __ ] he got cut same lindsay got cut they didn't trade him same difference they didn't trade [ __ ] stupid [ __ ] either david johnson they cut him too same thing damn so we got the tight ends i mean of course the one that you know do you have tight ends you signed a fullback yeah i don't know yeah i'm gonna be a run first offense uh i think if you get close to 50 50 i'll be good with it i because i felt like kubiak was a 50 50 play play like pass and run and i liked the way that was man don't be like the titans and [ __ ] indie and run the ball 80 of the time i don't want to be them and i definitely don't want to be philadelphia and not running the ball ever freaking like that's just uh and other dudes on youtube will be making texans videos if you don't know what you're talking about shut the [ __ ] up because that's some of that [ __ ] just be stupid as [ __ ] that's my favorite thing the texans are one of those teams to everybody that they feel they could just [ __ ] on and no that's a [ __ ] on them they really be talking good about them but then they don't realize how dumb what they're saying is oh christian harris is a really good linebacker from alabama but i'm not sure he'll start [ __ ] name three linebackers on the team better than him i'll win cushy exactly i'll say stupid [ __ ] there's not three linebackers better than him you'll find yeah chris we just uh we just talked about it it broke while we were on here let's go we're still happy as [ __ ] we're one third of the way there god john wall next please yeah i mean what we've been talking about for weeks to come is getting rid of what we need to get rid of and i mean dallas you got a guy he's an amazing why don't you gotta lie anymore yeah you got a guy that can shoot the ball we got a bunch of [ __ ] we got bob on i'm [ __ ] i'm buying a jersey you think they cut bobon man they better not you got to think about it though you have him in goon control you have garuba you have you have kmart you're probably going to draft a big man so he'll be the sixth really big man chris we got uh early brown trey burke tonight marganovich marquise chris and the 26 pick the 26 pick is the most valuable thing can i just make that up we didn't get so now you guys that's night three picks in the first yeah but we have no second round picks yeah that's all we need three and we're good i don't want to be oklahoma city with 50 picks and [ __ ] hey if y'all are watching this on youtube make sure y'all like it subscribe yes we do a lot of [ __ ] nba [ __ ] especially we're gonna be doing a lot of nfl [ __ ] so if you want to hear us talk [ __ ] about teams that you don't like y'all want to hear me talk about fantasy football i gotcha yes for shizzle pay way too much attention to that man i'm [ __ ] hyped now like yeah i'm awake if they say we train y'all say that i just think about that nelly song what what is getting hot in here no there's a song where he goes i'm a weak oh speaking of hot the they just announced on broke my weather service can be 100 degrees all next week [ __ ] bro it was [ __ ] the past three days been terrible bro it it can't be that hard june 21st is go skateboarding day i gotta go out there and do some tray flips i don't even know what that means is that for trade a yeah no no i want to see what dallas fans are saying best showing each time appreciate it bro yes sir appreciate you chris everybody's mad that everybody's like why they played the young bobon all right cool so christians out of the way we about to get our power forward i'm thinking my wheels is turning forward in the draft right so say we get paulo boom there's your starter bam at the force and going at the five one two jalen porter you need a three barrier do you want to draft i can't have a three coming since we moved on to the rockets real quick i will say that there is a lot of steam i don't know where it's coming from but a lot of steam saying okc is looking at jaden ivy [ __ ] no no i'm i'm telling you there's a lot of things and everybody's saying that they they what they should do is draft in the second pick and then they should go and go back in at the fourth and get him and give sacramento a bunch of stuff because they have the picks for it but what they're scared no i mean i don't give a [ __ ] ain't my team but but i'm just saying that's what i've been hearing in my great mind of [ __ ] giddy is not gonna be good without the ball and gildrus alexander is more of a two guard so i ain't going to trade shea ganges alexander for james i ain't doing it mavericks fans are saying they're going to win the ship next year oh yeah i hope y'all know that [ __ ] don't play defense somebody goes dallas making moves [ __ ] yeah golden state in five next year chris do you think i i still think we're getting bonchero i think you're kind of stuck with venture i i just i i think the only way you get banchero if jabari goes first you get banchero if check goes first i think you get and i don't think there's any scenario where apollo goes first nah the numbers have been showing [ __ ] it was jabari and then [ __ ] and now it's going looking like a lot of people are doing that carmelo darko militant [ __ ] all over again where they're like i can't pass up on the size but you gotta think about what orlando has they don't really need [ __ ] they don't right but you pass up on a seven footer yes i have two seven footers already but you pass up on that a young team that could cover for apollo's no defense true yeah exactly thinking of it like like [ __ ] we could cover for that if he could go get bucket i did have a dream though of uh bonchero and jalen green balling out on him i just want to hear your dreams that involved multiple men nick it was a magical thing that paulo's not going to make the rockets better no he plays really good defense or rebounds the [ __ ] out of the boat because offensively he's going to give you a christian would you offensively it's a swap and that's it paulo does good so you gotta idiot maybe we'll trade 17 and 26 to move up this is how i know this is how i know there's a bunch of fans that don't know any [ __ ] about nba everybody's like why the [ __ ] would the houston rockets trade christian wood for trash for the pit take our [ __ ] [ __ ] you know this nba draft reminds me of that football draft a little bit because in like the middle right after those big three you'll probably have a run of like some guards right like scores and then right after that you'll have a run of like three indeed players which is where we are so you gotta hit on number 17. um hype houston i tagged it as houston is immaculate today and this makes it perfect because astros looked phenomenal today texans look phenomenal in practice practice yes [ __ ] practice [ __ ] trade i think i'm actually going to get the rockets logo on my arm on friday see it was destined for him to get traded if if john wall gets traded while you're getting tattooed i need you to get houston tattoos until eric gordon's off and we do draft well my whole arm is going to be houston tattoos so i mean then get it laser removed and then do it again what the [ __ ] the city bro get get get clutch the bear tattoo don't you hey that'd be dope if i got all the mascots that would go for it you got to get titty twister uh steve though i don't know this is some strip club i went to back in the day sounds about right i wouldn't doubt it i know all of your friends and all my friends that went to the strip club back in that day so that would that makes a lot of sense i've never been it's a lie show the accusations um it was uh allegedly that they're vince mcmahon in you right now oh my god oh man i'm hyped now me too this is cool this is a good year so far they're trading everybody we don't want anymore we're we're cleaning out a lot of trash in houston like we got rid of deshawn and his finger popping each other booty hole stuff and then now we're getting rid of christian [ __ ] small wood and then damn like there's not really anybody astros i want to get rid of though i do want to upgrade i want kansas city's catcher i want miggy bro i'm telling you it maggie houston's gonna happen because they are the worst batting team in freaking baseball right now i think they're batting at one point thirty years or 130 together some [ __ ] it was a shitty number all right say he came to the team tomorrow where did he back yes fourth that's for dusty to figure out you guys should do me i got it i'm just bringing the good juju of him there and the rest is dusty or joe's spot i figure that [ __ ] i don't know i'm i mean i do feel mccormick needs to stay in a few times because he was going hot as hell and then they took him out um i don't know he's kind of regular like he don't do enough to make you think oh yeah he did good i'm gonna keep him there i just found all this i just found all the questions for the would you rather thing i'm really sorry i made y'all do that i forgot about that yeah that was bad it's funny this one gotta get rid of john walnut this is the perfect analogy right now dan goes y'all keeping fan favorite beaumont i hope so i don't know i i hope i hope they keep him and he guides alfred sengoon as like a player coach thing that'll be dope yeah that would be a good mentor for like how they get like how they get football players to be veteran mentors to the younger people like jj is over there in arizona you know he is good down to have on the team because if [ __ ] pops off he just picks up grown man bro he his hand hurts my face i just realized what he was talking about there was a video of him two days ago he was at a um well mavericks event and he was blocking all the kids shots and they the kids are getting mad and he's like you got to learn something like see that's what's up like i like this [ __ ] they said nba twitter rockets got fleeced in the trade rockets twitter and it's a pretty even trade we probably came out ahead though in the end and it says all rocket fans saw more christian wood games than anybody else in the nbaa uh i told you before we're gonna lose the christian wood trade oh yeah we kind of did but we just got rid of them so that's why we're happy but also you could probably i'm happy that we got bob on i know because both of them but we're gonna probably cut it yeah most of them are probably getting cut it's the pick that we want that sucks i'm just i'm hyped though like everything that we wanted the rockets to do to make a turning point more they're doing now they got the pick they got a top pick they're they're going in the direction trading christian would the john wall they've been said patience we're gonna figure out what to do with him don't worry figure it out faster yeah i want him gone already he can't because like you know he's not it's like the deshaun watson [ __ ] it's the nose place so he don't need to be here and then the food just opted in for his last 47 million he got the bag and now he's dipping that's what we signed up for though stupid ass is it would you rather have russell westbrook though no oh yeah would you rather have lebron yeah would you rather have ben simmons hmm he is a cheap i mean now that you rather [ __ ] criticize god i'll say this if you put ben simmons on your on the rockets team if you knew kevin porter would come off the bench yeah i knew christian was getting traded because i looked all over their social media and when they kept saying the guys are back he was never on there good and so then and then they put him on the astros and sorry but y'all really got scammed not gonna lie at least take javitch at 26. we got bob on and we got rid of christian wood eat a dick you got a mavericks logo on your thing don't you no you got a nets logo on there that's even worse [ __ ] off no i think it's luca jane up uh durant that's over already i mean for dallas i think it's a great fit for them they need luca needs [ __ ] help like luca needed help christian wood for me i don't want him on my team he's 20 he's older than all my guys and all that stuff for y'all i mean he might be really good he's he's a better odd person than christopher prosingers that y'all had i'm just gonna go out and say it like i watched a lot of rockets back like all of it and i watched quite a bit of dallas basketball especially in the playoffs y'all already have christian wood on your team his name is maxi clema and now you just got another one hell yeah cleveland might actually play more defense let's see mr jeremy johnson says the pick is to move up to top ten package the 17 to 26 from dallas exactly and that step one is done now who do they want there it's gonna be a fun draft on thursday yeah it's gonna be like football first though because we got a lot of picks early and then nothing late yeah that's true but the good thing is the nba 81 we can still talk about stuff going on because i'm sure there's going to be some trades going on nba loves doing their little trades in here good and then in nba you know you can trade [ __ ] chariza got traded like five damn times in one day that's gotta be shitty like hey you've been traded to portland fruit yeah hey you've been traded to oklahoma city what hey you've been traded that night hey you've been traded to [ __ ] uh japan i wonder if you use those picks to move up in the draft or you use those picks to go get a good small forward who can play already damn the i see mr goes now we should get marvin bagley from league minimum give him a chance to rewrite his career which has been a debacle so far in sacramento he needs a change of scenery he can play i agree with you but don't bring a [ __ ] here you're already getting paulo bunchero you can't risk having to do big man disappoint you damn i'll be shooting anybody go to sacramento if you y'all watch our nba show on our youtube we we we end up talking a lot about sacramento and their choices of that [ __ ] they do yeah they're pretty [ __ ] dumb it's just neither i want to see is there any rocket a lot of rocket fans that are not happy with this train of course they're not a lot of people are like oh here we go we're going to lose again i was like we were losing it anyway with him so yeah he's the he's the dead [ __ ] that hit the the game time shot against utah to go to overtime and he shushed the crowd at home it's like they're cheering for you [ __ ] dang who else you think gets traded i think jayshawn gets traded too i think tate gets traded he's i think right now after the last season he's at the peak of what he's gonna be and that's just gonna be a decline not a bad decline but a decline of his worth so you get what you can now and then just kind of all right what if like what if like they just end up resigning john wall yeah so do what even if he did say he wanted to play there's no [ __ ] minutes for you [Music] okay let's see mr goes it's low risk high reward you definitely do it especially after trading would you have no starting big man right now we're about to solve that in the draft i think on facebook chris cabrera says wrong move to trade christian wood well chris cabrera is stupid because his name is chris cabreras it's the perfect move everybody are the same player they're gonna be the same player why do you want two this is the lowest value you had for christian wood stupid fans that don't know anything that's what it is they don't know what's going on they just know that christian was a big name for the [ __ ] rockets the worst [ __ ] big man defender i've ever seen on our team he's that bad he was [ __ ] jerk let's go play with christian wood and luca bitching all the time look look all i want to say is rocket fans we've been right when we said brooklyn philly wait until you see james harden in playoffs yeah we told you so yeah mavericks fans wait until you see christian wood for a whole damn well i'll say about 60 games because he gets hurt just like anthony davis i'll tell you what's gonna happen he's gonna show up he's gonna give you a stat line like 25 and 14 and the power forward position on the other team is going to put up something like 40 and 30 because he's do whatever the [ __ ] they want he is going to complain well with luka though because he can play like a [ __ ] mr goes j sean and nuaba get traded and we need to resign schroeder unless we plan on keeping trey burke shooter will surely have a market for him as a free agent i think all the contracts we got though are all expired how schroeder played it with i like how schroeder played with our second unit like he played good with um jalen and kmart and sengoon oh man good that's what another thing that people need to understand is shin goon is re he's a [ __ ] boy among men out there dude plays with grown men in turkey league like he he's ready you could see spurts of him ready to be like i'm ready for more and you couldn't give it to him like if akeem allah praises you about about is he's gonna have you have to understand that he's gonna take an ass whooping every game like joker joker gets the [ __ ] beat out of him yeah so you can't expect him to play like [ __ ] 40 minutes but if he ev27 at center that's good to me best thing i've seen so far on twitter what at red 94 chris cabreza did you say i'm stupid caleb yeah that's [ __ ] up okay either fight me or come or stop complaining we're getting a complaint now to calvin all right guys you gotta go to i said many times that christian wood last season was the second most frustrating player i've ever seen in a rockets uniform following only trevor ariza's first season with the team when he thought he was mcgrady's successor i almost dare say it's as frustrating as when i had to watch von wafer think he was a star in this league i got his autograph and i threw it away this is no he isn't ready he can't play perimeter defense his feet are bricks i mean you're not going for the playing tournament this year you're it's a key rebuild why not but why not i mean you can but i'm just saying like i mean i mean i'm not at one i'm not watching these dudes work out [ __ ] i don't know i mean jalen greenland boy freaking been eating barbecue every damn weekend like what you gotta think about it is we were super [ __ ] competitive last year and a lot of games we lost yeah that [ __ ] gotta be a win i i i think it just comes down like if you trade christian wood we're not we're not sitting here saying like oh we're not competing anymore i mean look at what the product was on the [ __ ] court like he was the worst ball stopper we ever he was like having [ __ ] fake melo mr goes wooden his feelings he thought he was going to play with harden and westbrook okay i do sympathize with him on that that was [ __ ] up it says rockets were looking to move christian would declare playing time for alfredston goon and likely whoever they pick at the number three overall pick whether that's paula bonchera or shet home green they pounced on chance to acquire first round pick also no long-term salary in the process is a key okay stone i'll give you it goes you don't have any right to tell me i'm stupid caleb i can call whoever wants to but literally writing me at first it's not even me he's writing me in this group chat saying that like who is that guy he's just a rockets fan that you cussed out you [ __ ] yeah i'll cuss him out chris don't worry i got you back bro yeah it's in the closet right next to his new jersey yeah it's right next to my brock osweiler jersey what the [ __ ] i got a name for you and i don't know why i just popped in my head nick if you're a die hard rockets fan then this name will mean something royce white no [ __ ] pops minsa bonzo what the [ __ ] like a core memory in my head what the [ __ ] you know you know who i'm talking about yeah i i have now like rockets players moving in my head like a [ __ ] book oh [ __ ] i remember stroma swift bonzi well [ __ ] bob syrup i still i hate that juan howard i love my cousin to to death so you you know when you get a president you're like oh it's dope thank you i just hate that it was a rockets present and the [ __ ] the only good person on that [ __ ] picture is luis scola and kyle it has [ __ ] kevin martin on there scott padgett samuel you got us james harden courtney lee i like um i don't know who the i think that's ray for austin with the crooked ass [ __ ] shot oh that's dragic i mean he's good the dragon and it looks like chuck hayes that's not that bad chuck wagon nick was mad about it till he looked at it yeah it could have been a picture that had chase budding and chandler parsons on it could have been a picture that had royce white on it yo yo what up nathan what's up oh man so with wood gone and all these people and we get the 26th pick are y'all gonna be happy with what we take even if it's not supposed to know i know that [ __ ] i'm talking about it based off of like the football one we were doing because of either [ __ ] giveaway his head's shiny as [ __ ] right now i can say what i want to a good day uh i mean let's just say they don't take who you want it's just like with the football one like are you gonna be happy with whatever happens like the football one they didn't take who we wanted in the first no but you i knew enough enough about what was going on to know that we got good players well yeah i know but that's what i'm saying like so if we don't end up taking exactly who you want off the top of your head we end up taking somebody else do you think there's the same kind of thing you'll be okay with it i don't know it depends on who it is would you be okay with [ __ ] i'm i'm gonna be mad about anybody i can tell you know i'm going to be if one of those if it's one of those three are you if it's out of those three like say it's jaden ivy or somebody would you be pissed off like if it's jaded [Laughter] so you're good if you're you're [ __ ] or apollo i'm disappointed if it's the party that's who i want i want you both so you want jabari to answer your question yes i will be mad for like 45 minutes caleb and then i'll be like all right cool chat home run is a [ __ ] rocket so you embrace it and then it's like all right coop yeah okay that that's basically what i'm talking about like you're not going to be the ones that mad about it forever no i don't hold a grudge yeah i know i know you don't i'm trying to get our you know people that are watching to understand that bro if you haven't figured it out by now i will stay here until i'm blue in the [ __ ] face and argue for our sorry ass teams i know that i know you will just i just want other people to know that if i want to argue that come on bring it on [ __ ] if y'all want to argue i'm down if y'all want to throw hands i'm also down here yo can i get a snack first though cause i'm hungry okay i got some protein oatmeal cookies right here that don't sound bad these are like these are like pro meal oatmeal cream pie ones too man i'm trying to think nick what could we do with those pigs like this is going to sound ridiculously [ __ ] stupid right now but could you package 17 and 26 and probably somebody like j shawn tate and josh christopher to new orleans for zion and still have the number three pick i think you can though i think it gives you a lot of free to play because also ballsy to try something or is that just being not enough i feel like i don't think it's too ballsy i think it's like a big dick move more than anything yeah what if it's 3 and 26 and we keep 17 and you get zion in the 17th pick i honestly don't think that's too bad of an idea right there you end up with zion and then you take the chance of getting whoever you want in the first that's still there do you trust zion though i trust i'm more than christian no christian wood i mean he gets hurt but it's like fluke [ __ ] he's usually there as long when he don't come to work he probably gonna miss like the next 300. uh yikes that's the risk all right everybody that you know barely watches basketball would love it because zion's on the team and they know his name bryan and jayla the [ __ ] who had the monsters god damn it you really want to have the monsters on our team don't you it's the third week in a row you brought that up oh yeah sorry that was my favorite one the big blue guy yeah are you okay you know look you you're talking about uh the dude that uh larry johnson yeah all right how can we get rid of john wall how can we get rid of john wall who needs jump you won't know until after the draft yeah it's gonna be an after he's gonna be here through the draft which i'm so i mean i'm not surprised if this move got done because they got the pick so i mean what you needed to get it done now but that means i think this is a big domino effect now for draft because you don't know what's gonna happen on com draft day with everybody being like okay look once that first player goes if it's a surprise then it's a scavenger frenzy to okay well i want this guy i want that guy i want this guy i want that it's like with it's like with i know zack's gonna hate it but it's like with fantasy football it's like whenever quarterbacks get taken in the first round everybody else like [ __ ] starts going crazy to take all the really good quarterbacks that's how this was gonna go i know that's what i'm saying it's the same kind of thing the second somebody good is taken or somebody that you know everybody was looking for gets taken they're gonna go crazy for whatever they thought was gonna be the runner up for it no i think it's going to be like fantasy football whenever you get a guy and then i slap the [ __ ] [Music] hey you can't disrespect me like that guy i don't give a [ __ ] they must really think they're getting power i just love how he's yelling at me on facebook no he stopped watching this supporter thanks a lot he said he reported us to hr oh i love haters this [ __ ] gets my dick hard i don't want to be on camera [Music] i don't see where your hands are they're on my nintendo switch i've been playing pokemon this whole time because i don't know [ __ ] about basketball i just like talking [ __ ] to people oh man i'm hyped i know tomorrow when we do our nba game we can talk a lot more on it yeah because now i wish jeremy payne didn't get hurt then it'd be a great day oh yeah i was gonna look at it as rest for the all-star game i mean that's that happy uh glass half full [ __ ] yeah yeah that's a good that's good there's you know it's good to have a gray area it's it's stupid to be that person who's like oh either the glass is half full or we're dead yeah we keep john wall we suck my glasses into you we did probably you go get deandre head inside not anymore i don't want you you go get i tried to put two of them first round picks together and get me a a good ass wing player is what i would try to do wings sound good daddy do you sound good it's like because think about it if you draft two small forwards what the [ __ ] is what does that mean for j sean and kmart hmm true i don't really want to get rid of kmart why not because he's [ __ ] good oh he's the giant slayer candy blocking everybody he's the eater of worlds something like that i don't even know who that is i'll just remember the name it's like i'm like hype now like nine days hurry up next wednesday will be fun because it's the day before draft new rockets big men underwent knee surgery today and rehab after being acquired who monkey first yeah it's so [ __ ] up i like getting basketball you could trade somebody like yo bro this guy's out for the year oh you're getting traded but you're hurt yeah yeah joey they can do that they can do that baseball too it's so [ __ ] up it's like hey brother you already [ __ ] jacked but you know he's like because he knows that he bout to get [ __ ] cut i've heard about it in football but it doesn't happen often but i hear about it all the time in baseball and basketball like yeah we're gonna trade you even though this guy is out for the next 300 games and the funny thing is everybody everybody in rockets groups are like it [ __ ] happened let's [ __ ] go and then you got those other people that are like stupid get rid of christian wood it's nba fans that are used to [ __ ] being [ __ ] mediocre because their team's been mediocre their whole [ __ ] generation yeah and that's what it is you know what sucks though about trade and christian wood no that's another trade piece that we don't have to speculate other trades because our first chip to go we still have john wall we still got draft because there's no he's going to use those two picks and probably like a john tate or something to move up somewhere let's just go get antonio brown i feel like he's not doing anything in football i might as well switch over to basketball um i don't think he's athletic enough i don't know everybody's like we got [ __ ] [ __ ] ears so what do you think in the draft do we if we trade the 17th and 26th pick where do you think we move up to where's the livestream what you think we want hang on let me look as a right now on my thing why you call that man [ __ ] ears i keep hearing you safer number 10 right now is washington number nine antonio it depends on if there's somebody that you really really really want right like like shade on sharp i just don't trust that yeah yeah i just don't see now benedict matthew and i don't see us jumping up for him okay a god body it'll have to be somebody like keegan murray if he's there at like eight or nine maybe um i really want tori eason from lsu or um branham from um i think wisconsin we'll get caleb do you trade picks and players to try to get an established player to play small folk like can you think of somebody out there who you just put in like okay he's not gonna hinder jaylen but this dude makes us way better i can't michael irvin in the longest yard you need something like a wiggins to come on our team signing trades i mean those are huge in the nba but i don't know if i would want a player like paul george no i don't want to they ain't giving him kawhi if i i'm gonna get a vet i want a vet that brings value to my team but doesn't isn't like a cancerous like tick to my team either and i feel like i mean kawhi is not of course but i feel paul george has that playoff p [ __ ] i don't want i don't end that anywhere near my [ __ ] yeah he just finds himself in the mix of everything yeah and then he brings it on himself nobody was talking bad about him and he's like play off p's back i'm like what the [ __ ] like you're actually playing good now you brought the limelight back on here like i'm just happy that that the rockets are the first one that made a move i mean they had that your michael green trade but yeah but they don't really don't really mean [ __ ] for this this is one of those moves where he's like you trade a starting player on your team and you get [ __ ] bobon yeah [ __ ] ears caleb that's all always going to be looking at what we get watch can we get both out let's look at his ears i'm gonna go google it right now you won't stop hold on all right doing it let's see where's a good one this one right here perfect [ __ ] word that guy wrote on the thing saying that you can't say that word anymore sorry i can't say stupid no i'm just kidding i was like damn that's stupid i hurt people's feelings you did cry me a [ __ ] river [ __ ] why doesn't it won't save this damn picture of bobo is a perfect one here i got this one it's him in the philadelphia thing here we go bo bon bon janavi caleb look at his ear your new rocket bro y'all ever seen bubble boy yeah he looks like the giant guy that was on the train that mini-me was the conductor of this fool can dunk without jumping yeah okay so could y'all mean no he couldn't i ain't never seen him do it never seen him do it i ain't never seen two pretty best friends i always wanted to go no no no no all right cool we're gonna do some [ __ ] on draft day you just watch [Music] let's go i'm hyped i'm [ __ ] all right it's good yeah it's like when you make okay don't you start trading one person you want to trade everybody's like let's get these fools out of here come on come on come on let's get him like if my i would be like raphael's personal hype man like just to know the trades coming up let's go let's go let's go and then when they announce it i guess there we go hey you want to be there for the walk up and give him the card well call it now hey turn around and just scream it says apollo all right we're good now i mean it was a little bit uneventful you could have sold that celebration a little bit better too what the one that he was when he was trading you could have broke that news a little more suspiciously oh my god that's what zach does he always [ __ ] gets stuck and then he's like you know he could have done this i was looking for the breaking news thing or the the draft is in [ __ ] that we had but i was like i gotta change it around and everything i'm not doing because we had that trade alert thing that which i need to add on this one just for random [ __ ] that was a good one oh man well i'm [ __ ] hype now like i mean i want the astros to do good on their schedule beat all those in the [ __ ] new york team yeah oh we beat the marlins i mean we played the marlins yeah all you got left is what rangers no we're downranges we're off tomorrow white sharks white socks they they need to fire the gm keep him until we play him then they can fire him yeah yeah let us be the reason y'all fire yeah yeah thursday may be a great day for us because we we're on draft day astros will be playing the yankees which is always fun that's gonna be a fun one we playing four times two yes well if anything else they had boys i'm [ __ ] hype no i'm good people are stupid that's all cool i mean being mean to people on facebook i don't i'm definitely sending the rockets emails with ideas tonight somebody goes why is with the rockets they're always making dumb moves why wouldn't you keep christian wood you're a donut he goes he's better than bo bond he is better than bobon we would have got a [ __ ] ton more for christian wood if we traded him a year ago yeah we traded him during the season yeah or we find him waiting and wait until the next trade deadline somebody goes isn't christian wood like the worst free throw shooter in the league and somebody goes so was shaq and they won a championship yeah because shaq had kobe on his team don't do that either it goes luca hey can we get a.d mavs we had a.d at home christian wood that's so [ __ ] up this is true he's a poor bad idea i want to see luca and christian would take turns shooting the ball from 30 feet that's what they're going to do that's true that means he's got he's taking minutes from somebody probably and ain't dory and finney smith because he played good in the playoffs dirk nowitzki i don't even think dirk russia is here anymore he'll get [ __ ] yeah i don't think he brushed his hair when he played to be honest i'm going to say i don't think he did that either nash well i've got nothing done i'm done yeah i'm done make sure y'all go like us on all platforms like subscribe follow all that stuff youtube go and uh we've got we've got uh discount codes on stuff popcorn coffee some uh daniel seasoning all that yeah bios of our stuff and go use it help us out hot sauce hot sauce too go buy some melinda's hot sauce we got to try that hot sauce that my homies sent me we can do it wednesday we'll do a draft special with hot sauce on wednesday and yeah wednesday is the wednesday is the day before the nba draft oh okay so we'll do a rockets all right zach i'll give you two of them and i'll keep two of them and we'll do it all right i'm not so sure i like it but i'll do it but the other one was disgusting no no no these are these are my homie my homie made them so we're going to try them out for if you got honest criticism do it you can put them on a little caesar's pizza i can do no i have to do that on draft they wouldn't i could only have look we can only have little caesars on here if james is around i'm buying little caesars on [ __ ] draft day that's what i'm gonna do all right maybe for tomorrow it's a if we give out shout outs to the little caesars on the nba live to see if they're never trying to get hooked up with a little seizure so we can get little nascar jackets and yeah me and james already and nick we've already thought of a commercial it's all planned out and it's gonna get five jackets and a dog jacket and yeah god damn it calvin and avery are going to do the uh lady and the [ __ ] with the cheese with the crazy bread yeah wearing a packer like little caesars painted packers oh my god like the starting five podcasts little caesars well houston fans if you're interested you can watch us live on the network thursday for the nba draft more than likely we'll be beating out everybody on the tv with your trades your rumors and your picks join us chill have a beer with us smoke if you want i don't care do what you do like probably like eight minutes ahead of them fans also