A Jimmy Kimmel Tell All | Politickin' with Gavin Newsom, Marshawn Lynch, Doug Hendrickson

[Music] man what's happing man you got Marine beast mode Lynch Doug Hendrickson and Gavin Nome and you're listening to politic to be to [Music] be I don't know what the hell you did last week but I was running around in cartel tunnels last week uh hanging out at the border down there hanging out with pandas from China so did you bring some work back though what's that did you bring some work back though by the way one thing you learn about the tunnels those are two-way cartel tunnels it's not just the drugs coming in it's the cash and the guns going out it's a hell how much you come up on though did you get a couple you know I mean no how many tunnels are down there are you talking tunel thousands of tunel how many tunnels it's a crazy thing I know everyone talks about building a wall but it's what happens below the surface that almost impossible to detect so I had an opportunity to go down to the Border but also went down into one of these tunnels and when they go down into the tunnels the border patrol and others actually have to bring Naran down there because of the residual fentanyl that's often left behind so you saying you went down in the tunnel to get high so you went down low to get high is it what you're telling me low to get high just I'm but it's it's a reminder you can get high walking and climbing above over those uh damn border walls but it I'm serious we don't they don't even know how many tunnels are out there and they've been finding more and more tunnels the technology is pretty primitive but it's pretty basic I mean you just go in there's little Rail lines where they move people and they move the narcotics and and when I say move people um the the tunnel that I was at they discovered uh there was dozens and dozens of people particularly Chinese that were so you seen some people there was some people in there and passing while you was going through there like hey what's up I'm just on my way to America right quick BL I'mma holl at hey look you got my vote when I get over there I'll be back for dinner it don't work like oh you're sounding like a right-wing talking points you get my vote when you're hey man I'm just saying if you let me just let me slide through this tunnel one time for the one time I get them you know mean when I get over there look you know you got to vote but you feel no that's not how it by the way um the human trafficking is becoming even as big lucrative wise in terms of just money as the drug trafficking which is crazy they just sld a whole person it's bad man the human trafficking which a lot of people are coming uh just for well they're actually paying off those that that're the traffickers and they end up paying them off for the rest of their life not only in terms of sex trafficking uh but just hard labor for the rest of their life but others are just paying off these cartels uh at the border 7500 bucks some cases it's tens of thousands of dollars depending and if they don't pay we're starting to see a lot of folks that have been shot on site if they haven't paid the traffickers so if they know this right if they know that then how is it so much dope coming in this [ __ ] cuz look it was a it point a time I had a couple you I mean I had a couple you I mean family members that done passed away from [ __ ] with that uh with that fitting all you feel what I'm talking about but that [ __ ] getting that [ __ ] getting through bro and that [ __ ] getting through at large amounts though you know what I'm talking about and if they know where it's coming from it's like well then why you just don't go there and just be like hey look check it out let me get that fitting all right quick going back about your B but that [ __ ] is finding its way through though in massive quantities and and the irony and is it you don't need a massive amount of that drug to be deadly uh it's cheap it's easily uh mixed with other drugs it's all over the country it's leading to tens of thousands of overdoses and the vast majority is coming in uh through the Mexican border but it's also a lot of the precursor chemicals that come into the component parts are coming from China and it was interesting I was with the Chinese Ambassador uh the day after I was at the border and uh we discussed some of the work that the Biden Administration is doing with President XI to address precursor chemicals so to answer your question marshan is they're they're trying to deal with what goes into Mexico and trying to try to hold the line on those chemicals before those chemicals are converted to fenel and then they come into the United States I put 394 uh uh men and women uh from the National Guard to support our counternarcotics uh in our interdiction efforts to support uh the folks down there at border patrol that's why I was down there with our National Guard men and women that are s how much they getting paid then is still coming through I know they're not there not like the old days I don't know y don't even know what the old days were but look we we got we got folks doing the right thing uh I know a brick of fit going for oh a a brick of fitar going for something stupid right now you know talking about on the street that [ __ ] keeping the economy moving but Gavin I appreciate your work this week I I want to acknowledge our partner here Gavin because guess what he since the Hall of Fame game last week he is now eligible for the Hall of Fame next year and so our guy right here this time next year might be walking into Canton in the Hall of Fame he should be and I think he will be how does it work so now he's eligible since he's five years removed from his last game to be in the Hall of Fame next year I do believe we'll be sitting here next year and Marsha will be wearing the Yellow Jacket uh on the podcast so marshan congratulations to you being being a uh first year eligibility this year coming up it's going to be a fun year and fun ride for all of us how many people how many people get in every year there's about five that get in every year there's there's probably list of 10 newcomers this year that are on the ballot of which I would believe maron's in the top two or three of the new list I'm not going to name the other names and then there's obviously guys that from the past years that are eligible too that didn't get in but look we got a great chance and I think we'll be there and uh no it's it's going to be a fun year Gavin because like I said this is kind of the buildup now to that class you can to hear a lot of stuff about Marsha these next uh eight nine months so is this part of it is this kind of like getting an Oscar you got to work the refs right now you're sort of promoting I think I gotta go on tour or some [ __ ] like that do you I gotta start campaigning D [ __ ] supposed to be my AG I I will be campaigning for you hard I this today's my first day of campaigning for you okay this is it this the start of it I'm going to go high and hard for a long time the whole year Gavin you and me are going to be on the trail promote Sean let me ask you is this like politics you take down your opponent or you just out there promoting yourself well tell me the truth I got go I gotta go through a couple [ __ ] under the bus and [ __ ] Bro telling the truth you guys must do op research on your other running backs try to trip them up come on tell me the truth or this is like a Love Fest and I'm just I'm there rooting for the other guy because other running backs you know I mean I don't got to play against them so I you know I mean it ain't nothing but uh more power respect to him to be we're at where we're at right now after U you know all these years when he came out in 2007 to to be considered for the first ballot which is very very rare I don't know the numbers of running backs have been in first ballot but I believe uh we will be in a good shap uh spot Gavin so it's gonna be a fun run I love it do you get a bonus or something Maran you gonna pay him a bonus if you get in the hall of fame or just you know acknowledge Him at the speech no that ain't got nothing to do with his ass that was my body that [ __ ] should give me a bonus [ __ ] hey hey Gavin agents we don't we don't charge on bonuses unfortunately cuz if I got in then he like oh yeah you know when he go out recruiting you know the Next Generation the players like oh yeah I got I I represent Hall of Fame running back blah blah blah blah or how many Hall of Fame how many Hall of Fame guys you got right now well you'd be my first Hall of Fame guy so I'd be it'd be pretty EXC so I'm your daddy boy you're my son look at my baby boy I see you Jor look man look they told me as a black man you don't want to be first to do nothing but hey right now if I'm your first one then I just solidified you you you no longer call me Maran Shan Mr Lynch Beast mod d a d why there you go Daddy not the one that made you but the one that raised you you understand and I don't call you s o n I call you s u n cuz you shine son understand me Jes but guess what guys we have a we have a great guest coming up and uh I think he's ready for us right now yeah what what is what is Jimmy Kim will know about the Hall of Fame he'd be in his own Hall of Fame his own Hall of Fame for late [Music] night what's up with your Bo what's handing how you doing I'm cooling big dog was the word I know my bad my bad but I had to say until my you know I mean I nobody knows what you mean more than me mar that's the oh see look man that's hey we gonna hold a special bom my boy that's right so Jimmy you speak marshan because man I can use a translator sometimes brother look here you go Gavin get off that square [ __ ] man I told you you got to let your nuts hang man just hey kick back and let it flow you understand me that is great advice you do have to let your nuts hang yeah thank you from both of you really yeah Doug you're the agent save me buddy no you know what here's the deal I I maron's let it hang for a long time I've let him ride with it and it's work so far so all good but Jimmy thank you for coming on the show we really appreciate it man my pleasure I'm glad to be here thanks for hanging with us by the way what what what I I just saw this what the hell happened to huie Lewis well yeah huie Lewis is uh my good pal in fact huie Lewis is the guy that got me into fly fishing which um I know you were a an avid a fish anato of and huie Lewis has Min years's disease you Maran do you know who huie Lewis is no cuz I if you wasn't looking and couldn't see my face I about to hit you with the Huda you know mean but how old are you Maron exactly you know I mean some people would say you know I mean I'm 21 yeah you're too young for huie Lewis I'm about 40 you've seen Back to the Future right hell yeah yeah you know the power of love from Back to the Future That's The Power of Love the heart of rock and roll um okay you know he's he's had a lot of hits in the 80s anyway he's a good paline and he's lost his hearing um he's got something called Miner's disease so he can't sing anymore and so we thought oh maybe we'll try to sell a TV show and fox was interested and they bought a uh uh we're developing it is what they say and uh so we're writing a script and hopefully we'll have a TV show for huie Lewis coming up you you you you writing it I'm uh no a guy named Kirker Butler is writing it and I'm producing it okay cuz look man uh [ __ ] had me you feel me like I was back in school and [ __ ] had me doing my homework on you and [ __ ] though right and then uh I found out you was behind uh crank aners that's right that's my show yeah dog that [ __ ] used to have rolling bro I'm talking about on my back though you feel me you I said oh [ __ ] the other time didn't even know that that was you that did that [ __ ] but I'm like bro that [ __ ] was too funny bro oh thank you thank you yeah those the old days Comedy Central on God so you just be coming with hits and [ __ ] I try you know I not as many hits as you but I I you know I i' I've I've delivered a few n them them different kind of hits though them shits them shits affect the body and they affect the you know I mean they affect the brain yeah they got they got this new uh this new medicine that they've been putting out on the uh on the uh on the market that kind of counteract that get your body feeling right get your head feeling right you know is that right it take it take you to a thing that they call your uh your happy place you know I'm saying is it is it something that our governor is legalized in the state offor well huh this a medical breakthrough is it hey you you know what and it work you know it it work all the way down to my mama you know I mean we can you feel me we could bond on some [ __ ] you know I mean them old school aches and pains that a [ __ ] had you feel me you get a little bit of this uh I gave my parents some gummies and my parents have never smoked anything in their lives or done anything they've never I mean they barely even drank and um and it was really it was it was a fun experience it was um I mean I wish they were high all the time to be honest with you they they more personable huh you know that was one of the time you know L there's less of an edge there I made a I made a breakthrough with my mama you know what I mean hey Jimmy speaking of that I I I've I've long admired your career and what you've done obviously from Crank anchors to radio and comedy so we growing up I'm curious were your parents funny because obviously you you know did you grow up in a show business household were your parents funny did you do crack jokes with them how funny my dad funny but everyone else in my family is funny my mom was class wit in her High school in Brooklyn she went to a huge uh high school in Brooklyn New York and she was um she's funny and um everyone all the women in our family are very funny my grandfather was very funny it's just one of those things like you can't really you can't be part of our family unless you're funny my dad is funny but not intentionally he's got his own kind of humor which is so you got no so it ain't no so it ain't no uh no like like no sensitivity in the household cuz it's like you come in this you better be on your [ __ ] otherwise you going to get you your ass going to get roasted there is zero sensitivity there is man hey man look you know what we probably got more in common than than you think cuz I mean I'm telling you you come to my house look fresh I'm telling you ain't it funny you know for me like everybody I became the famous comedian Marshon became this funny football player that everybody loves but I know that there are at least six people in my family who are funnier than I am and you know you it be like that though it be like that cuz cuz I got people in my family that I know for sure way better athlet possible that there's not a Lynch family reality TV show I mean it seems like it seems like a no break Mama Lynch Mama Lynch starring M Lynch and then Maran co-star we we he for real no C we kind of you know mean we kind of we kind of stayed away from the uh away from the cameras and [ __ ] and you know we made it like a family affair so but when you do get that rare opportunity to do see some of that [ __ ] you talking about some hold on where the [ __ ] this dude been at or where she been at this whole time because this [ __ ] is funny well Jimmy I know I know you uh I know you went to school in Vegas Jimmy maran's living in Vegas maybe you can go out there how about we do a reality show with you live you and Marsha go back to Vegas live in a house together and uh that'd be pretty interesting that might be it might be hard for me to do my job but I would be definitely interested in seeing Mar you hide in a [ __ ] man you understand me our whole ouro you know what our whole life would be like a goddamn uh a crank anchor skit I don't see why not you know I um who do you think is on the Mount Rushmore of weed who would you guys say is on that I mean Snoop obviously has got to be there I mean yeah I mean on the left to the right but this by the way Marsh def this one I will defer as they say Mar to you on this one brother willly got to be on it Bob Marley Bob Marley 100% well we're gonna have to put more than four heads on this thing Snoop course Chong have to be on them oh nice nice CH you know I think I've seen some with uh with chich and Chong on uh I think he was doing something with Matt Barnes and stacks and they were saying you know that was all for play play now I don't know how much I believe it you know I mean because they looked at hot in the [ __ ] while they was doing that thing you feel me but see though I got a couple man I got a couple knocks in my family that you feel me though they you I mean I know y'all think SM uh Snoop smoke a lot but you feel me though I got a cousin I'm talking about this blow like a chimney you know I'm talking about it's almost like every time I I turn around he got a blunt in his mouth and he rolling one matter of fact it's a gab Leaf you feel me so he trying to get you know I'm talking about he trying to get high and I be like damn bro like and and you work with kid is I'm like how you how J if you understood if you understood then you understood in order to deal with them mother boy sometimes you gota you gotta be out your right mind this has to be the weirdest podcast ever right don't worry though they said it get better though with time it gets it gets better yes Jesus by the way hey speaking of Time how many time well we we'll talk another day about how much of that's going on during the NFL season that's I I'm just I I that whole drug testing regimen there is a little questionable I'll just leave it at that I'm talking about you marshan I'm just saying that's what I hear second third hand it's What I Hear Marshon have you ever been in a situation where you're on vacation and the NFL said okay it's time for your drug test and they had to send a guy out to you hey man look I ain't gonna even hold you look I was doing a popup shop out here in uh in Vegas for my Beast mod uh clothing line and I was in something called program so my address is California uhhuh I was in Vegas and I get a call like hey I ain't at home you know Blas Blas okay no problem call you back in five minutes they had a drug test [ __ ] on deck in Vegas this [ __ ] pulled up to my uh to my popup like hey you got a piss I'm like bro we in the I mean we on the Strip what you like we gota go to the bathroom bro is one of the most awkward [ __ ] position I ever been in my life bro we was at the Flamingo bro we go in the bathroom bro he whip out the whole kit put it on the table I'm like no we can't what like bro you know how embarrassing this gonna be bro somebody come in here and catch me having to piss in this cup for you he like well look man you got 30 minutes if you don't if you don't piss you know I mean you gotta uh you go you gonna get a failed drug test suspension four four games man went to that door I lock that door bro you got a whole mob of people banging on the door I'm in there got a piss in this cup bro most awkward [ __ ] position bro is when I gotta unlock that door bro and this dude with the big ass piss kit bag walking out bro and I'm sitting there like oh man but they want they piss the question we all have is did you pass did you pass let's just say I wasn't suspended for four games well well Jimmy here here's a here's a funny story and you might you might have used this back in the day but around 2003 2004 I had a client and I'm going I'm I'm I'm pocket I'm basically just you know going through my uh my day and I get a call and my client calls me and this is a true story public story my client calls me say Hey you know I got stopped at the uh at the TSA TSA uh checkpoint and I said well what did you what did you have he said I had this Contraption I said what do you mean it's Contraption and and he was and he's like well it's this thing that you use to avoid drug tests I said what are you talking about and he's like it's called the Whizzinator and so he said they stopped me there was some like white powder in my thing I said well what was the white powder he says well the white powder you put water on it and it becames because fake urine and that'll go to pass the drug test so here I'm Googling this Whizzinator thing and it's a contraption that you you put on and you can buy him in different colors you can buy black ones white ones different colors wizor you out of pocket BR wonderful and and so so he used a Whizzinator to pass all these tests and the Whizzinator I didn't know back in the time was used you know in in different Industries but the W that that particular test caused the NFL to then say we want to watch [ __ ] piss we want to watch these guys that was the last time that anybody could just go in the bathroom on their own and bring the cup back so the wizard stock went like crazy when this thing came out I think Letterman or Leno one of them talked about it on the air and the wiiz nator became a massive product but that was uh that was the last time these they would allow these NFL guys to to basically piss and quiet I would say oh boy I experienced this with uh I was I went on a little vacation trip with Tony Romo and his wife and he got a call during we're up in Northern California and they said yeah you need to have the drug test and he's like oh I'm in I'm in Napa Valley I don't know how that's going be possible and they said well we'll send somebody up and sure enough they sent a guy up and he had the kit just as Marshon said and the guy had to go in the bathroom with him it was one of the it was very strange but man that's some disrespectful ass [ __ ] man yeah and what and by the way how bum were those guys that collect the test when they told them like Oh by the from now on you're going to have to be in the stall with the guy looking at his penis that's some AAC man I tried to get the guy to tell me who had the big biggest and smallest penis I guess for professional reasons he wasn't able to share that no but Gavin no joke they would literally if you're in Bali on vacation and you don't tell them where you're at they will find you in Bali they will find you anywhere to get that test done it's unbel my understanding though is they once they do one test and you're clean that's it for the rest of the season or they they they stick on top of here's the deal it's just a green goddamn light that's if you're not in a program if you're not in a program is is one schedule test you pass that test and then you good but if you're in that program [ __ ] I know I done probably got test maybe like four times in one week and Jimmy do you know what do you know what day the test you have to pass is it's 420 so for April 20th no no [ __ ] April 20th is the date the NFL tests the players in the off season so it's a double holiday that's really that you know what that's like that's like so making you do taxes on Christmas Eve that's unfair Governor Nome you should do something about that you know what I I I've been trying to do something by the way this is just for the record I mean and marshan you we've talked about it Jimmy marshan I remember talking about just the absurdity of of just the whole marijuana regime in the NFL it's hardly a great performance enan answer yeah meanwhile though these guys are jacking up people with prescription drugs after games they're going home taking shots at Jack Daniels or you can smoke a little weed and have all the medical benefits not wake up up feeling like [ __ ] or addicted to all these prescription drugs the whole thing is absurd and and and so I I hope the NFL is starting to wake up to that new reality and moving forward uh with some more common sense yeah it is nonsensical yeah well what's also nonsensical is you're refusing to go back on the Oscars leaving us with no host Jimmy no host no one wants the damn job why don't you want the job it is fun it's it's hard it's it's a lot of work and um and the show suffers a little bit to be honest your nightly show because when I'm focused on the Oscars I'm less focused on the show and uh I just decided I didn't want to deal with that this year it was just too much last year you wind up pushing everything off till after the Oscars and then you have to do everything you promised to do after the Oscars after the Oscars and uh you know I also it's you I did two years went well I did another two years it went well I figured I'd take a little break so how how did you balance that though cuz I mean my transition right from being a uh you know I mean from from from playing the game and then you know TR transitioning over into you know the entertainment space like it's is I mean it's a lot of crossover but that [ __ ] get that [ __ ] get pretty hectic I'm just you know I mean I'm just curious to how you know you transition from you know I'm not good at balancing I'm really not it's it's not one of my strengths so I just I'm Allin when it comes to something like the Oscars I think about it in the morning and at night and I you know I have ideas I want to work at on them and then the show seems like on my nightly show seems like a nuisance sometimes um we have all our writers from the show working on the Oscar so it distracts them and it's fun to do and it's it feels good when it went well but um for me it just was too much just to do it three years in a row so you have aot you have a you have like full creative control over that pretty much yeah they don't much they really don't I mean it's part of the deal they don't pay you but they also don't interfere okay damn that's a sharp [ __ ] boy you sharp as [ __ ] I mean you must have given them some advice on someone that would be a good host I mean who's who's what's the over under on that I think there are a lot of people who would be good hosts of the Oscars it's just a matter most of them don't want to do it you know it it takes a lot of time and a lot of the people who you think oh yeah that person be great she'd be great he'd be great they know they'd be great they just don't want to do it and the especially when you think somebody's going to be great the only thing they can do is prove you wrong when they host the Oscars so it's uh they say it's a thankless job and I wouldn't necessarily describe it like that because when it goes well it isn't but it's not a it's a tough spot to be in hey Jimmy speaking of host this summer I know you took little Hiatus and you had a bunch of guest hosts are you picking those guest host yourself or does the network pick them or how do you figure out these guest host because they've all been fantastic Anthony Anderson was great Hugh Jackman Ryan Reynolds I mean unbelievable guys you know this is our I think third summer of of guest guest hosts on the show and what we've done is we've invited some people that we really like back now some of the people we invited that we really like back weren't able to do it this summer but that when we we develop a Shand with some of these people like Anthony Anderson has done it more than anyone one and he's a good friend he knows everyone on our staff he's been on our show probably 30 or 40 times so when when he's there it doesn't even feel like it's a guest host and then we have people like well Hugh Jackman and and Ryan Reynolds filling in they did one night and um you know all the Nerds on the staff were super excited because they love the superhero stuff and and then those guys are both super talented and so um I think it's I think it's a good EX EX for our staff to have another host in there because you know there are a lot of things that I do when I'm there that they suddenly have to do and I feel like when I come back they appreciate me more I love it so Jimmy you're obviously somewhere right now with some elk in the background you're not you're not in Hermosa Beach or La I I take it when you're off this summer you shut it down or you you put the phone away and you fly fish and hang out chill or what what do you do on a normal day basis I do I like to fish I um I do a lot of cooking I cook a lot more during the in the summertime and then I I do I feed the kids I make uh I made some Korean barbecue the other night um you know I I do a lot of um meat smoking and and that sort of thing and um yeah I just mostly get away from my my telephone so you get the opportunity to go and be a human to be yes a normal human being so you got like I ain't gonna lie like when I uh my first time retiring I'm thinking like yeah this [ __ ] going to be yeah everything but what I found out was I was institutionalized you know what I mean so being able to get away from that [ __ ] and I'm figuring out like okay no I wake up at you know I mean 6:24 in the morning I'm like oh [ __ ] I gotta get ready for PR oh no wait I ain't I ain't playing and then now I got to figure out some [ __ ] like how to was that hard was it a tough adjustment hell yeah that [ __ ] was hard as [ __ ] I remember having dinner with Mike Patza one night and um it was it was not long after he retired and um he told me that he didn't know how to make a a plane reservation he had to learn because his whole life people had been making these res plane reservations for him and I don't know anything about that I I don't even understand that and by the way do you guys have to drive yourself anywhere do that when the last time you drove a car G it's all good man I I was thinking about do you got a license bro that's by the way I I went to the White House a few months ago they said where your license I said you got to be kidding me I don't drive I haven't dri well Jimmy you've been on you've been on vacation Jimmy but did you see Gavin cleaning the streets of LA the other day of of these encampments and trash man stop going out there for them for them goddamn photo ops you know my wife is on the board of directors at a great organization called St Joseph Center and they they are they do a a really great job of helping people get off the streets in Los Angeles and uh we do a lot of stuff for and with them and one of the things that we did was we um we got a hold of a a parking lot and we set it up with um the governor actually gave us um eight FEMA trailers and so we put in each of those trailers uh homeless mother and her children in each of of the trailers and um it's been going on now for years and every one of the families transitions out into into a house um they're helped um with job assistance they really helped to give them uh time to get on their feet and out of their cars or wherever they were living with their children which is absolutely horrible and um it's it it's it's been an eye openening experience I mean I I don't envy you having to um tackle that problem because it is so very complicated and um and uh just so I just I don't you know I I mean I know that what we do there and what that what this St Joseph Center does is of great help but also sometimes you feel like oh my God this is only eight families you know there there are thousands of people out there you know it's interesting I I've been doing a lot of Cam and cleanups for years and years but one one story sticks with me it's indelible and it's in the spirit of what you just said I was down in San Diego we were near an offramp we went in and uh this guy comes out uh it was a little bit agitated that we had come up on the encampment in this tent um clearly a meth adic the teeth the whole thing came up introduced himself as a meth adic and said hey man I'm you know a little pissed off you're here but thank you and I said well I appreciate that he goes well here's why I want to thank you we open the tent and there's a brand new baby I'm talking about a couple days old man a couple days old and he said can you can you help my wife and can you help my kid and she's strung out this poor kid right there and it was just reminder I mean you can walk by people you can drive by people and call that compassion and I'm sure as H glad we we we got in there and and and tried to save this kid and this family and you know what's interesting this was a young guy who who came from the Midwest he said I got a Greyhound bus I was struggling with meth addiction and he said my girlfriend and I we eventually got married said we both came out and by the time we got we were going to be clean and sober a new life in California and when we got off the Greyhound bus we knew we couldn't do it he goes that's how you know it just the throws of addiction and so it's so complex this stuff and and you know same time you can fix it I mean in your pro point of that you and your wife and the work we're done I mean you see people that have turned their lives around all the time uh we know we can solve it it's just the scale Jimmy your point the scale of the challenge which is so overwhel and the work never stops it just never it never stops you know people come to California it's it's warmer and um and um it's it's a a liberal environment but then you get situations where nobody wants homeless people in front of their business and I understand that and um uh boy I think that is the just the toughest one there is no so when you when you do something like that and you I mean you go clean up the uh we call them the 10 cities and then you go you you you get them people up out of there then what what what's the alternative like where what you got for them like where they going like what's going on CU I noticed that uh in Oakland the spots that have been you know I mean cleaned up or whatever then what happen is you get a lot of this [ __ ] a lot more car break-ins you get a lot more kick do on the on houses and [ __ ] and it's like all of that [ __ ] that those people that had you know over the years they done accumulated that [ __ ] and then when you go and clean that [ __ ] up and get rid of it it's like oh well [ __ ] I got to go out and I got to hit again cuz now I really don't got [ __ ] now not only do I not have a place where you know I was laying my my head but you know and them [ __ ] be nice boy they be having like solar panel that solar panel systems going on TVs the you know what I mean the the the little uh stoves all the [ __ ] like and then when you clean that up and you get them up out of there then it raised well I see it raised the crime rates in a lot of these places cuz now it's like well [ __ ] I had this and now I don't got it so I got to go get it again so like what where where do you without getting too deep in the weeds I mean that's the tension is it's you know you just out of sight out of mind you just sort of cleaning up a block and creating a problem around the block and so you know won't bore you but we've we've got a whole process and a protocol we call it resolution grants to resolve the underlying issues to provide services and supports to address the complex issues and they're they're multifaceted it could be drug or alcohol addiction mental health could be a combination of both it could be something as simple as having a dog but the shelter won't take your dog with you and so you refuse to even go into the shelter people been in shelters but have been assaulted and so they need a house uh and getting a landlord that allows even if you have a voucher uh to rent to someone that's impoverished so it's complicated man it's hard but it's uh it's the crisis that I think defines more stress and more frustration than any other in state of California people's anger about the state to be Canada yeah so that [ __ ] is really hard though right because I own a building in uh in downtown right right and it's across the street from like a City team and you know they you know they do a lot uh you know for the homeless and what end up happening is at a certain time like they'll close their doors and then you know if you're not there on time then you can't get in and what they end up doing is they'll come and sleep you know right in front of my building and now I got five uh commercial units downstairs so you I mean at this time now you walking into you know maybe the barber shop and it's like you I mean you got six or seven people just laying in the in the doorway and it's like man get your ass up get up out of here and then what happened is them people remember that you just made them get up and they don't have nowhere to go so as soon as them uh soon as that sun go down them street lights come on them [ __ ] coming they kicking in my doors you feel what I'm saying they kicking in my doors busting my windows like all right you don't let me sleep they taking shits in front of my uh in front of the the doorways they pissing all the uh all on the buildings around like it just stink you I mean the garbage SKS that we have out there you I mean I'm talking about Overfield to the Max and it's like well [ __ ] and just across the street it's like you have a place to go but all right you can't get in now what I'mma do now I'm like all the people there like oh they broke in last night and they you know they stole my product and then you know if it's a vacant uh space down there then and you know I mean come in there do a little bit of cleanup and then I like damn somebody kicked in the door I got you know [ __ ] got they whole goddamn bedroom set up in you I mean in the bathroom in one of the building it's like hold on what the [ __ ] is going on Amen no and by the way I know Jimmy came on like what the hell we talking about hom but this is real it's raw it's emotional it's complex you just described it uh but it's you know it's reason uh when I come back I'm going to come back as as Jimmy and Marsha and Doug not as a as a was see if you could have uh you know that company that you just talk about send me a couple of the uh FEA uh trailers down to my spot so they could stop kicking in my do and [ __ ] man well it's it really is should get expansive yeah yeah it's uh it it is it is a great solution and it's a great situation when um a a a business owner allows you to use a parking lot cuz a lot of business owners won't but says yes you can use this um parking lot you can turn it into a little um a little village and you we have security there um 24 hours a day it's uh it's just a way of now of course what you're talking about is is Criminal behavior and um probably as a result of drug addictions and um that's its own issue but um there were also a lot of people who aren't criminals who don't have drug problems who are on the street and who need help and um those are the those are the people that uh that I think um that you can come up with a really clear plan for No Doubt hey Jimmy I app what you're doing Jimmy with you and your wife I question how's your uh how's your son doing now I know he's gone through some stuff how's he doing now yeah my son had my son Billy he's 7even years old he had his third open heart surgery in May and he's doing great you'd never know other than the scar in his chest you'd never know he had it he's a a very funny kid and um he's just like he's he's totally he's totally fine now he's hopefully we'll never have to have another uh surgery of any kind and um thanks to the Children's Hospital in La which is a great hospital and uh he's he's uh I mean I was I was just I was going to tell you a story but um there he's he's a weird kid he's uh he's he's constantly squeezing his mother's ass he says it's just so juicy will you stop so he get look Jimmy hey you go I told you more look now I don't know about the mom cheeks but you I mean you can't you you when them cheeks is right man you know I mean sometimes when you know you know you I mean oh Jesus where's the lawyer here I need a lawyer no see this is all in this is all in good spirit and all in good fun so you know I mean that all of that other [ __ ] is that's for the birds you just tell them you're only allowed to squeeze mommy's ass El yes period stop Jesus that's Hey listen you volunteered to be part of this show I I don't I I can't help you I don't know what to tell you this is your idea by the way have you uh have youve been following any of the Olympics I mean that's com speaking of what's coming into the streets of LA uh the plane is landing athletes are coming descending it's all about the next Olympics that torch is being passed to California yeah it's going to be fun um I actually met with the Olympic Committee I we when they landed their helicopter on the roof of the building across the street from us it seemed like it was it seems like it was 15 years ago and uh we're still four years away but I'm excited about having the olymp I love the Olympics I've been to a bunch of them and um I think it's going to be a lot of fun having it in LA well you know what's crazy Jimmy I was with my son the other day he's 13 and we're talking about like back in our day uh well me you and Gavin's day like the sports now like think about the Summer Olympics back in our day there was gy there was gymnastics there was swimming there was uh track and field basketball now there's break dancing there's there's every sport that like what like who sh like hander or something I'm like this is crazy in terms of sports but no it's been it's been fascinating snoop's done an incredible job know I'm trying to get one of them kind of jobs so uh you know you say you talk to an Olympic Committee Olympic Committee hey throw my name in there you feel me like yeah Sean want to do some of that [ __ ] that Snoop was doing come to the Olympics talk his [ __ ] you know I'm saying Jimmy I could see Snoop and Maran in La could you doing that stuff together oh yes I mean are you kidding me would be I think we'll probably have to um uh some of the um we have to keep some of the uh speed related athletes away from them but uh you might slow some people down but I think uh yeah you guys would make quite a Duo no no no not when it come to getting your work no no when it come time to putting your work and then you know you got to you got to pass that [ __ ] to the left hand side and then you got to leave it alone until you done doing what you doing then you can come partake in the festivities and activities you know what I'm talking about but because we are speaking the same language you could be the translator for you know for for individuals like you know I mean for individuals like Batman or Doug who don't who can't understand the shine Jimmy you know I mean they can't understand that y my boy y see he can't he lost right now but you could wheel him back in and then you know he be like oh okay cool cool cool so that should be an Olympic we need to go ahead and put that in the the Olympics hey uh you know I have nothing to do with it but I would be more than happy to uh to be your Martha Stewart at the Olympics oh man oh man I I have way too much to do with this and I ain't listening to any of this damn stuff I'm taking so this fall back on you hey you're talking the wrong yeah exactly trust me Trust Batman I mean hey let me direct between Jimmy and Gavin we'll find you a job at the Olympics in 28 we'll find you something down you guys we're talking about all these fancy folks I am curious I'm serious because I all these people you guys have met both all of you guys but Jimmy I'm curious just for you was there any time you've been Star Struck by anybody like legitimately we're like damn someone that just even it was out of the norm and you're like you yeah yeah you know I have moments that I just can't I can't believe are happening to me I got a I get an email from Steve Martin today and I was just like I said to my wife I'm like and now what am I supposed to do just go about my day as if nothing happened I mean this is a guy who when I was a kid you know especially and all through my whole life I've idolized you know as one of the funniest people uh ever and just to get an and just the fact that he thought oh I'll send Jimmy Kimmel an email is is mindboggling to me but um yeah Don Rickles is somebody that uh I always I couldn't believe it's sometimes it's like you don't even really realize these people exist you know in in real life and then they're sitting next to you on on a couch and I think once you forget like that that's amazing and that's exciting then you should probably stop doing your show because it is amazing it is exciting and you always have to remember you're 14-year-old self and how excited that person would be to see the future and what is what is coming because it's not something I None of no one in my family is in Show Business no one in my family you know ever really did anything other than his you know regular jobs or whatever and it never occurred even to me that I might be on television one day so to have to be in this situation is something that at least a couple times a week I have to stop and remind myself like oh yeah this is this is pretty crazy hey Jimmy let me ask a question you know as you I'm an NFL sports agent and I I I hate almost all the agents uh I'm competitive as you know are you in your business are are you friends with Fallon are you friends do Leno still talk are you friends with his other hosts or do you guys kind of stay in your own lane no um uh I am very good friends with all of the other late night hosts in fact we did a podcast together over the um ryer strike and we really bonded at that time I um fished with Jimmy Fallon over the summer I'm going to fish with um Co bear coming up pretty soon um yeah no I we're we're we're really tight in fact for Co Bear's 60th birthday Fallon um John Oliver Seth Meyers and I came out to New York and we surprised him and uh had a birthday dinner for him his wife dropped he his wife told him that they were going to have a private dinner just the two of them romantically together and he got there and it was the group of us and it was pretty funny actually the reactions of the people in New York as we one by one filed out of the restaurant they were losing their minds you guys talking business or I mean and it's what what do you guys all talk about when you're together you compare notes or you just talk about life we goof around we talk they probably bust hella jokes on each other though we you know what we do what about Conan uh Conan was not at that but um Conan is a friend of mine also yeah Conan lives in LA and um he's a really really funny guy and a hell yeah that's my dog Conan really [ __ ] with me I don't know why but con turned me up brought me on that show a couple times really [ __ ] around with him um yeah Bill Mo Bill Mo brought me on this [ __ ] too he was he was solid he like that's somebody who we if we did do our you know I mean our our crank Anor thing we probably have to bring her too because he I think he smoke hella weed too he does he does he does smoke hella weed dog seem like he be smoking hella weed too busting hella Joe hella busting hella funnies too but that yeah that should would be interesting as [ __ ] yeah so it's not like the old days where you know Leno and Letterman didn't get along or even like where Leno and I didn't get along in in the in the early days of of our show BEC and I think it's a lot of it is because of YouTube and because of the fact that people watch the show when they feel like watching the show in the old days you had to watch the show at 11:30 or 12:30 whatever time the show was on so you had to pick a show and you don't anymore you can watch all of them it's interesting by the way where do you I mean it just and I mean I imagine you guys have to have these you're having with your producers Etc but when you're I mean 10 years from now where the hell do you think see late night going in that context um well I don't know if there will be any late night television shows on network TV in 10 years maybe there'll be one but there won't be a lot of them there the audience is uh there's a lot to watch you know and now people can watch anything at any time you know they got all these streaming services it used to be like you know Johnny Carson was the only thing on at 11:30 and so everybody watched and then David Letterman was on after Johnny and so people would watch those two shows but now there are so many options and maybe even more significantly the fact that people are able to easily watch your monologue online the next day it it really cancels out the need to watch it when it's on the air and once people stop watching it when it's on the air networks are going to stop paying for it to be made can you can you Jimmy when you're done can you walk away and disappear can you uh can you get away from this and just like I'm out or do you always got to be cranking it and doing doing uh doing busy things well it depends on what you mean by cranking it but um I you know what I will have a hard time when it's over I know that's why I asked Marshawn earlier about his his uh trans position after playing is because it worries me and that's part of the reason why I I keep going each time I think well this is going to be my last contract and then I wind up signing another contract it's because I have I I fear that day that Monday after my final show and it's like okay um now what I'm gonna do now what am I going to do because there's you know there's not a I don't know there there aren't a huge number of options for late night hosts after the shows are over people think of you as a late night talk show host and it's it's not like you're suddenly going to start starring in films start try to be an ex politician Jimmy Jesus I mean I I'll take your status over the ex politician status yeah and our Future's not bright Gavin no it's really depressing yeah we got a sell by well I got a sell by date it's called term limits you don't necessarily hey Sean I think you and I can find Jimmy and Gavin a job when they're done right Marsha we'll find them something to do here yeah Maran going be you're our Sage you you'll guide us Jimmy but Jimmy it's interesting as an agent like in the NFL you know like if Marshon walked away he retired in his own terms and he still to figure out what's next but 99% of these athletes the phone stops ringing so then they're just like okay I might play I might not and then you don't really know there's no like no one telling you okay it's time to leave and so now you got to figure out life and that's the hard part as far as most these players in every sport because and and I assume you entertainment is the same way it's even worse because you know the phone stops ringing there's no more you know auditions whatever it may be so your space and the athletic space is a brutal brutal space and I applaud you for making as far as you've done and as a Maran and by the way Jimmy Maran that we talked about the top of the show is first year of Eligibility this year for the Hall of Fame oh yes right I think he'll get in next year and and and that's what we're going to campaign for but in any event it's a tough space you who will give your Fame speech uh [ __ ] probably my mama oh wow that you got to get her good and baked before she makes that speech oh man you know what she gonna make sure she take care of that herself she probably only thing she probably gonna say is just make sure you got that doie pack for me ready to go I love that idea that you would have your mother induct you into the whole F has anyone ever done that before I don't think so I don't know but I know my man my mama my was I can't even say was is my biggest uh my biggest fan my biggest supporter and I mean [ __ ] I could just remember the first the first time uh you know I was getting ready for a game I'm in there uh you know laying out my my jersey my pants my socks my clicks like oh I'mma put my helmet right here I got my mouthpiece this that I'm so [ __ ] happy and my Mama come in the room like boy what the hell you doing I'm like I'm getting like [ __ ] you in here laying out your uh laying out your uniform like it's the first day of school I'm like [ __ ] it is that's right it is we lost we lost our first game bro I was crying and hella [ __ ] my mama told me some of the best advice that I you know I mean it stuck with me you I mean for the rest of my career like uh like boy you over here crying and [ __ ] like you get to go out and do this again next week so just go do better I'm like I get to do this again like yeah [ __ ] you got about nine 10 games left on the SC oh man that was that was that was like you feel me the one who told you to let your Tang down man Jesus from a from from from from a small from a from a from a Tiny Tim you know I mean from a Tiny Tim moms was always you feel me though pushing that issue like Yeah Boy when you get out there you gota let them nuts hang okay Mama Mama Lynch is it was the best is the best I mean his biggest fan by far and her Hall of Fame speech will be epic trust me by the way by the way Mar you may not Mama Lynch just she said left me like a three minute e uh voicemail last week about all the political stuff make giv me the same goddamn advice literally like it was literally showed up I haven't heard from her forever it said Mama Lynch I'm like you can't make this up hell yeah and she did like all this advice and you know just you know everything's gonna be great you know it's like Jesus Christ yeah I mean she's go we gota you know she should be the one mom's got some ISM you feel what I'm saying mom's got some ISM and and one thing about her you know I'm a I'm a I'mma tell the [ __ ] straight up like n I'm cool I ain't trying to talk to you like that you feel me though but Mom's going man come here man and I don't care who it is she gonna come and she gonna give you some game and you gonna walk away from it like damn that [ __ ] make a lot of sense hey Jimmy there' be games in Seattle where I go up there and I be like hey Mama and Lynch you want to go grab some lunch she's like no I can't I got an appearance so she the fans the fans loved her so much up in Seattle literally she they would book her for appearances the only mom I've known ever done so you get the Seattle she'd be making 5 10 grand a game going and going to tailgates and going to bars signing autog kissing Seattle so look it not only that like you know I mean we we we we we we individuals with big hearts and [ __ ] so you know I mean I done I done I done uh build relationships with a lot of my uh teammates so you feel me when it come down to it it's like okay this my other other other son and that other other other son happened to be me so you know my moms get with [ __ ] I'm talking about all the Mas from the team like hey come on we could go over here we go sign autographs for about an hour hour and a half before the game we go get a couple dollars so you know I mean we come out on the field you know everybody looking for they for their moms in the designated spots and [ __ ] looking around like hey man where where I don't see my mama like oh yeah bro I forgot to tell you bro Mom's done took them over here to uh to Tacoma the to the uh Casino they over there doing a uh they doing a autograph sign and they they'll be here probably like around you know what I mean by by the time the first quarter come clock work we come out running on the field for the start of the game they sitting there like they've been there the whole time hey baby come here my [ __ ] like where you been at oh [ __ ] I had to go get me a bag right quick and I'm talking about from [ __ ] from Mama Sherman to Mama Thomas Mama Irvin Mama com like you know I mean all the moms and then she you feel me like hold on you got a sister okay well [ __ ] bring your sister too so now they got the moms and the aunties and that [ __ ] autographs so when you come out and you hear all that screaming you think it's for the teenss but hell no the cameras done went and put a uh put the Mas on the uh jumbo try and they cheering for the masam and [ __ ] like yeah Jimmy what you have any of that was your mama like that Jimmy uh yeah no my mother um is um she's uh she doesn't she doesn't love being on camera which of course makes me eager to put her on camera once years ago when we're doing the man show I uh I sat my mother down and I said I didn't tell her what we're going to do but I sat her down in front of the camera and I said mom um when I was a kid you never explained The Facts of Life to me you never told me about sex I had to find out figure it out from a neighbor you know so um what I'd like you to do right now uh my mother's very uptight when it comes to this type of subject I said I want you to explain sex to me right now put it spot like that I'm like 31 at the he tried to joke her way through and I was like no tell me how it worked tell me start at the beginning and tell me how it works how how how did that work out it was very uncomfortable for her and very funny for me oh [ __ ] hold on now so you bring it up as a uh you know you talk about when you was a kid and [ __ ] uh yeah was was you a funny ass kid too yeah I was you know I was always [ __ ] around that was my uh it was just how I um how I entertain myself in classes is interrupting the class and some of the teachers uh really didn't like it and some of the teachers really did like it so uh you know the teachers that really did like it I I will never forget and the teachers that really didn't like it I guess I'll never forget them either but fed me in different ways sure did you have hands too was you in any little fight no fights no I was uh a year younger than everybody I think I weighed 126 pounds in in high school you know oh you was a little guy cause hold on some uh I was holling at one of my folks man he do he do some work with me and he was telling me uh I guess when you was in uh might have been grade school yeah the kids used to call you came not with a backpack but with a briefcase oh the briefcase briefcase Joe is it that is right yeah my my first day of Junior High School in Las Vegas at Kenny GN Junior High School my mom said hey you know dad got a new briefcase and maybe you want to take his old briefcase to school and you know was my first day of seventh grade I was like oh yeah that' be cool I'm like a I'm like an adult now I'll go in with a briefcase and so I put all my stuff in the briefcase and I walked into the lunchroom this first day and I'll never forget it I walk in and some bigger kids look over at me and they go hey briefcase Joe and I just my heart sank I was like and I was so mad at my mother like she should have known better to give me this briefcase hold on so when they did when they so did that name stick for a while it didn't thank God it didn't I imagined it at that moment being my name for the whole rest of my scho career but luckily I don't think I ever saw those kids again and I I definitely never brought that briefcase back but so you retired that [ __ ] I did um do a I wrote a rap song with Eminem on the show Once and that was the title of the song it's on YouTube it's called briefcase Joe and it's about the childhood trauma I experienced from bringing my dad's briefcase to work hell yeah did you bust hella jokes on them uh yeah no no I just I I just I knew that I'd made a mistake and I turned right around and walked out oh [ __ ] see I wish I took that ADV I I used to go to school with a suit on so we'll talk about that another time man so on man so you me to tell me a little gel little whole thing it was like but no one no one told me to stop I didn't even no one I didn't even get it you so I'm surprised I'm still here talk about it you were like Born to Be Governor I'm telling you a suit to school how old were you when you were wearing I was I mean I don't know like 8 nth grade and I'm running around with a little C tiee the whole thing the whole all the way through High School your wor well it was when I discovered you know you you were talking about sex there but I discovered hair gel and that was like revelatory little Dippity Do I had I played basketball my my sophomore year and they had a little cheer says Dippity Doo Dippity dooo Gavin Gavin we love you I was like I I believe a jail I believe a jail I believe the suit but you playing basketball I just I'm did you play basketball in the suit or would you change un buddy very cute running down his goddamn hair down his hair good in high tops in a suit you looking real good Jesus hey Jimmy by the way you you and Marshon do have something in common Jimmy although you know Marshon tell Jimmy where your honorary degrees from oh you can't see that [ __ ] from Princeton yeah Princeton Jimmy Jimmy's at UNLV and you're at Princeton something's wrong with that Mar what's wrong with that hold on man you got to show love to the kid man not I am showing love to you not just Princeton though you feel me slid through Cal too you Cal too that's right Jimmy we're all state school kids we are St I'm a 960 sat kid I don't know about that U UC see nonsense did you really get a 960 on your 960 buddy I think it literally it was 960 or 980 uh my mom said don't even take it again because she's like it ain't gonna get easier it's not g to get better yeah hair gel a suit and a 968 sat how the hell did I end up here you forgot the hi tops with that suit I got a 1280 on my satv and I still drunk from the night before when I took 1280 how the hell you get 1280 were you were you getting you getting all that private tutoring or something no I never did not never did aing or anything uh man some people just got it oh really is that how it works Mar some people just got it some people come stock with this [ __ ] you know what I'm talking about really Doug you and I buddy hey by the way my SAT is a little my SAT is below Gavin Jimmy no [ __ ] I I I took mine the day after my father died so I didn't get a very good score that's an excuse I don't have a goddamn excuse he just 96 learning I a little dyslexia I'll give myself a little Grace okay I got a little so I wasn't good at those sort of you know the Rope you ended up in a good spot you've overachieved gav okay you went from you went from getting bullied to herir gel to the governor so you've done a really you super overachieved I mean by all accounts you were kind of an imbecile in high school I guess at 960 yeah I think this is a good way to end the goddamn podcast I think we're done bastards I'm over was they taking your lunch money too man I talk about we'll talk about all those things another damn time man yeah really seriously Mr Princeton really some some people just got it it's some people just got it honorary degrees is what they got H deges they did it right too on my degree they put Maran beast mode Lynch beast mode in parentheses so somebody over there at Princeton knew what the [ __ ] they was doing you know I mean and then you get you get a Top Flight [ __ ] like me to come up out of Princeton like you feel me I just Prestige them about a couple another mon notches on they prestige level you feel me I get people talking about you know I mean hey Maran you think you can get me in this uh in this Princeton Club like nah you a square bro we don't we don't rock with like you up in you know what I mean you gota you know I mean you got to go put some work in first go get your hands dirty we gota make sure you 10 toes down to end that Jimmy I want to say we really appreciate you coming on on vacation and uh we've always admired what you've done your career has been epic uh and uh can't thank you enough for joining us today yep and before we let you go I I've been making this a thing though when we got individuals come out hey how are you how are you doing though I'm good I'm good I'm doing good I'm I'm enjoying that's a nice question to ask I appreciate you you asking that question and uh I will say everything's uh I I I can't complain I'm in a good spot all right that's all good man thank you Dr Lynch no no problem hey that's what I'm here Lynch that's what I'm here for man they didn't give me no specific uh uh uh title with my honorary degree so I'm a man many hats right now I'm a I'm a dummy Ducker right now so you feel me I'm I'm I'm ducking and dodging dunck uh dummies right now so you I mean it come at the right time so right now you know I am Dr Lynch you I mean Dr Beast mod Lynch and you I just want to make sure that you're doing that you're doing good you know I mean personally there's a Mr Beast and there's a do Beast there's a do Beast I check the license of this Mr do whatever the hell is Jesus Christ don't make me go up on that on that wall and bring down the practice brother yeah I got it it's called it's called orange juice and a blunt for breakfast and then we good Jesus and with that Jimmy thanks for joining us brother thanks guys good to be with you take care [Music]