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A waste of Bellucci The juice is well and truly loose as
Michael Keaton's bio-exorcist returns at long last with Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. It's
the most Burtonish Burton movie yet, but there are moments that could've been bio-exorcised
without being missed. Warning: spoilers ahead! Teased in the trailer as the film's big bad,
one of the most notable crimes Beetlejuice Beetlejuice commits is introducing a great
villain in the form of Monica Bellucci's Delores and doing absolutely nothing with
her for most of the film. Revealed to be the cause of Beetlejuice's death, the movie
sets Delores up as an impressive force, broken out of containment as a live-action Corpse Bride,
and sucking the life out of Danny DeVito's Janitor before setting off to exact her revenge on the
former flame that killed her. And ... that's it. From there, the actress spends the rest
of the film walking towards the camera through the kooky and crooked halls of
the afterlife in search of Beetlejuice. "Where is Beetlejuice?" Only in the film's final act, when the movie
is rushing to lay all its plot threads to rest, does she finally encounter her ex-hubby
— only to be swiftly eaten by a sandworm. It's nothing new for Tim Burton to cast his
real-life romantic partner in a project, but here's hoping that in whatever gig he has
lined up next, Bellucci gets more to work with. Dead-end love If we had a nickel for every time Jenna
Ortega was the daughter of a popular goth character and falls for a local boy who turns
out to be a monster, we'd have two nickels, which isn't much — but it's weird that
they both happened in Tim Burton projects. "Pain and suffering are always inevitable." "Where have you been all my life?" Equally as impactful as Dolores, Arthur Conti's
Jeremy really does feel like a rough draft of Hunter Doohan's Tyler from Netflix's Wednesday
series, which is even more annoying given that he actually gives a great but grossly
underused performance. The only benefit to be found in his inclusion is that his killer
spirit, Richie, acts as an entry point into the world that Astrid has refused to believe in.
But even that leads to some sketchy plot holes. "Astrid! Stop torturing your mother." Did the youngest Deetz family member really need
romance in order to see things from her mother's perspective? More to the point, what was it that
allowed her to see Jeremy in the first place? When the ghost spills the beans about his plans
to use Astrid's soul to escape the afterlife, he even admits he doesn't know why she saw
him. We wish it had been given more time, or none at all, instead of
lingering in storyline limbo. Derailing the soul train Wednesday provoked questions about
Burton's racially-skewed casting choices, and Beetlejuice Beetlejuice does little to dispel
them. In fact, the only scenes in the new sequel to involve characters of color are when, dragged
into the afterlife by Jeremy, Astrid finds herself at risk of being sent to the great beyond and
has to board a subway train filled with Black extras dressed in '70s gear and afros. It's a
cheap, outdated set piece that only highlights just how limited Burton's films are
in regards to diversity. When the only speaking role a Black cast member has is as
the Conductor ordering everyone "All aboard the Soul Train," it shines a spotlight on
the fact that more work that should've been done here. Like the Soul Train itself,
the sequence never really goes anywhere. Not canceling Jeffrey Jones A minute spent paying attention to
a character played by a convicted sex offender is a minute too many.
And yet, in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Jeffrey Jones' Charles Deetz is not
only the main drive for getting the family back together but is repeatedly – and
unnecessarily – revisited throughout the film. "What? Why? No. No. No." For those that don't know, in the early
2000s, Jones was arrested for possession of child pornography as well as soliciting a
minor to pose for nude photos. He was given five years probation and required to register on
the national database as a child sex offender. While Jones doesn't reprise his role, the film resorts to stop-motion animation
to reveal Charles' cause of death, explaining that he was killed in a shark
attack during a bird-watching expedition. For the rest of the film, Charles
is shown as half the man he was, wandering through the afterlife as a pair of
legs topped by a shark-shaped bite where his head used to be. While the uninformed might
be fine with it, Jones' continued presence throughout the film is strongly felt when it
shouldn't be there at all. Why couldn't they have simply used a line of dialogue to write him
out of the story in the same way that the mere mention of "a loophole" explains why Barbara
and Adam aren't present this time around? "I can't believe Grandpa is dead." Instead, far too much attention is paid to
Charles' character when simply giving up the ghost would've been the preferable approach. Rory deserves better - or worse In a film that includes a horrifying birth
sequence involving a Beetlejuice baby having a Trainspotting moment, somehow Justin Theroux's
parasitic boyfriend weaseling his way into the Deetz dynasty comes off creepier.
"Oh my god. I was helpfully getting some boxes in town and I heard
you screaming! Are you all right?" Another new character that makes
little impact in the film as a whole, Theroux does a great job in turning
Rory — the new beau of Winona Ryder's Lydia – into a loathsome foil. The problem
is that the big reveal of his true agenda and the justice he's dealt as a result are
all dished out in the time it takes to say: "Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice." There could have actually been something worth
playing around with here in terms of story. Rory secretly shares the same view as Astrid, whose
disbelief in her mother's story is the wedge that pushes them apart and may have made for a
more interesting family fix by the end. Instead, Rory's forced to admit to his scheme before
being swiftly carried away by a sandworm and Delores at the end of the film. As a
result, Theroux's character ends up being just one more of many that are rushed
off stage when time could've been spent to reveal that the real monster was the other
guy haunting the Deetz family all along, and not the one with the mad green hair and
rotten teeth – even if he's no good, either.