🙏 AJ Brown Contemplated Suicide During 2020 Season • Opens Up About Mental Health

hi everyone I just uh start off by saying um I'm sure everyone have have saw the video I posted on Friday um um to be honest I posted a video um that was a a dark time in my my life didn't nobody really know um but I posted it because I wanted to encourage others to seek help whenever they are they are they are down um I didn't know really really didn't take in consideration what depression really was I always just brushed it off uh that's how I I grew I grew up um I just brushed off my feelings and uh and uh it got the best of me you know and I just wanted to put out a positive message that uh that I'm still here I'm still I'm still growing I'm still learning I'm I'm blessed um I got a lot of things to be grateful for and uh someone was there for me so um reach out to your loved ones and ask them how they're doing and and listen to him you know cuz it's important you know so uh yeah widely positive were you were you pleased by that uh yeah a lot of guys a lot of guys reached out to me um tell me what I did was powerful um a lot of guys on my team um sat down talk to me one-on-one about their struggles which which we need to do more often you know we need to need to look out for one another you know I know we play this beautiful game but you know life is beautiful too so all for putting out that message second of all um sorry it's okay um just what made you kind of come out and want talk about that I'm so sorry you're fine you're fine it's okay uh like I said it was a a dark moment and it was a year ago uh where I had thought about you know taking my life you know um and it was it was special to me because um it just came with my heart that I wanted to share with others and help others as much as I can like I said I'm here I'm so much to be grateful for I'm blessed um I know I wake up every day and get to play the game that I love but you know I have loved ones around me that love me dearly you know and um I just wanted to help someone hopefully I could save a life or anything so too personal understand if it's too personal but what prompted you to feel that way um I won't get into all that you know that's that's between me um but uh yeah you talked about was there for you was it a teammate was it a family member maybe who helped you get through with it uh um it was a Elija Moore um yeah it was Elijah Moore that's he's he's more than family he's more than family um I love him like he's my brother and he is my my brother but um he's a special special person and um I appreciate him each and every day important is it for somebody in your position like you said to come out and and speak out about it because a lot of people from the outside will say you know you're an NFL football player you're a pro bowler you make a lot of money you know you have a lot of notoriety what could you possibly be down about right yeah um life happens to everyone you know I'm human just like everyone else just because I I play this beautiful game just doesn't mean life is not going to happen to me too um so like I'm grateful for the person that was there for me um and um I just wanted to encourage everyone to seek help if you if you're down and you're depressed and just try to get help good example AJ though of of like John was saying you on the outside you know everything looks like it's it's great for AJ but people just don't know right what what's going on inside somebody yeah most definitely man some uh I know for me um walking around with a smile that's that's easy to put on everybody can do it you know but you know we go on WE some of us have real life problems you know um so just how you deal with those things and that's why I said just talk to someone reach out you know us as men you know to be honest our our feelings aren't too much cared about you know so um especially men just you know get things off your chest you know um it's okay to talk to talk to someone seek help you're not too tough to talk to someone you know so how to have a coach like Mike Rabel who makes those emotional deposits with you guys you know and is open to to conversation and to things like this um it means a lot it means a lot uh I appreciate uh coach ver just for everything um I I just try not to I try not to um you know sometimes I know this a business and and sometimes you don't want to get emotionally attached or tied with someone you know cuz it's a it's a business side of it but man I appreciate him so much um and and people like that I think no matter however this business may go I think um forever I'll be a friend of his and he'll be a friend of mine you know um but I appreciate him so much from just open this door just listening trying to help me as much as I can um it doesn't go unnotice with me so uh he's definitely family in my book U regardless of we have a part ways down the line I wish I hope I hope not but you know but I appreciate him so much you still confront that that Darkness from time to time or you've been been pretty good for the last year no I'm I'm I'm in a better place mentally uh um that was that's behind me that's behind me now um I know how to deal with certain things if something comes up in my life now um like I said growing up I just kind of brush off my feelings and you know I buried him and uh you know you don't need to do that you know you need to get things off your chest and talk to someone you know you mentioned uh Elijah Moore was the one who kind of helped you in that particularly uh dark moment I guess what is kind of made you guys so close beyond the fact that you guys were were teammates at Old Miss why why is he kind of like more than a like a brother to you um um I live with him um he seen my struggles I seen his struggles you know I know what he want to accomplish he knows what I want to accomplish you know in life period you know uh this is this is not just football talk this life talk you know so uh just being around him so much you know uh you start to to a point where I felt like I kind of kind of raised him in a point you know in college you know I seen him grow seen him do all the things he wanted to do and um just being there for one another you know so you think you did you maybe think about posting that video and and maybe what was what was that kind of got you to the point to be maybe brave enough to do it uh I thought long long and hard about posting a video uh um it was on my phone for a while I actually recorded that video earlier that day um but I didn't post it until later that night so um it was it was a all day process and I was kind of nervous to to post it but you know some gave me the courage some came over me to to just do it so how much you I know you've been very open about your relationship with your little girl on social media and how much she's meant to you how how much has she been your life how much do she kind of pushed you to kind of keep going and to be strong for her um my little girl man she's amazing um um um it's the it's the reason why I'm still going today um um I don't even have the worries for it I don't know she she gives me strength she is who I play for um so um without without my little my little girl I don't know where I'll be so was was it a year exactly uh I'm trying to remember to to the date that you know that you had thought about you know as you said you had contemplated you know taking your life was that yes it was uh November 12th okay did you I mean and again whatever's private is private but I mean did you feel like you were you were you were right there on the on the edge or or um I won't get too much into detail about it but uh um it just it was heavy on my heart so you touched on it a little bit but how important is it your message and you coming out to try and fight that negative stigma that surrounds mental health right uh I just wanted to come out and and just try to just put that to rest you know uh mental health is real um just like physical health you you take care of your body when you're sick just like when something's going on with you you need to get stuff off your Chase you need to talk to someone seek professional help if if need so um but uh you got to take care of your brain just like you take care of your body too you know so find ways to a safe safe place for you um do the things you love you know so enjoy every moment