Browse Transcripts

Category: Comedy

-finally, guys, it's monday. it's time for "wepost." here we go. -whoa! -♪ wepost ♪ ♪♪ ♪ wepost ♪ -welcome to "wepost." this is where we, as a group, decide something we should post on socials. i'm gonna show you five different posts, and we're all gonna vote on whether you like each one or not. and... Read more

Category: Comedy

-guys, just a quick mention that this friday is the golf matchup everyone is talking about. it will be settled once and for all. that's right, i'm talking about the cardigan classic i challenged... [ applause ] i challenged dj khaled to a golf match. he looks like a fun guy to play with and he's really... Read more

Category: Comedy

-i'm sorry if i -- if i seem a little distracted. i'm still thinking about this nightmare i had last night. or should i say my tonightmare? [ thunder crashes, woman screams ] i was alone, lost in the middle of a corn maze. it was getting dark, and i couldn't find my way out. ♪♪ i started to panic. i... Read more

Category: Comedy

-performing "flea" from her new album, "all born screaming," give it up for st. vincent! [ cheers and applause ] -♪ i'm just like a hungry little flea ♪ ♪♪ ♪ jumping on somebody's warm body ♪ ♪ when you start to itch and scratch and scream ♪ ♪ once i'm in, you can't get rid of me ♪ ♪ once i'm in, you... Read more

Category: Comedy

[ cheers and applause ] ♪♪ ♪♪ -♪ don't blink, don't wait, don't walk, you're late ♪ ♪ don't fall from grace, behave, don't trip, sashay ♪ ♪ okay, sashay ♪ ♪ don't kid, don't blame, don't snap, insane ♪ ♪ don't crack, don't act your age, don't change your name ♪ ♪ it's all the rage ♪ ♪ do ask, but don't... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Okay let's see if we can get through one of these skits sketches baby please okay ready c maybe maybe [ __ ] you want me to break uh okay do we go again act on theire my name is laen michaels i'm the producer and creator of saturday night we're excited because there's never been a television show like... Read more

Category: Comedy

-you look fantastic. thanks so much for being here. -thanks. i'm so happy to be here. -i haven't see you in a while. and i said, "how was your summer?" and you told me you had a brat summer. -well, duh. -what do you mean "well, duh"? -didn't everyone have a brat summer? -yeah, i mean... [ cheers and... Read more

Category: Comedy

-enjoy yourself. enjoy yourself. welcome, everybody. welcome to "the tonight show"! you're here. you made it. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for watching. well, guys, tomorrow, in philadelphia is the big presidential debate between vice president harris and former president trump. which, of course,... Read more

Category: Comedy

[ knock on door ] -hey, demi. -hey, jimmy. -i'm so happy you're here. thanks so much for being on the show. you look fantastic! -well, yes. i mean, you see how i dress to appear on "the tonight show"? very demi moore, very mindful. i mean, i don't come to "the tonight show" with a green-cut crease.... Read more

Category: Comedy

-welcome back to "the tonight show." we're about to play a game called box of lies, but i'm gonna need some help. she's a very talented actor you can see in the new movie "the substance," which is in theaters nationwide on september 20th. please welcome demi moore! [ cheers and applause ] welcome, welcome,... Read more

Category: Comedy

-thank you so much and welcome back to the show. thanks for coming on our show. look at you here on the cover of "variety." [ cheers and applause ] they're calling this the year of the -- the demissance. -wow. doesn't that sound like a party that we should go to? -yeah, we should go to the demissance.... Read more

Category: Film & Animation

Okay let's see if we can get through one of these skits sketches baby please okay ready c maybe maybe you want me to bre uh okay do we go again act on the my name is lord michaels i'm the producer and creator of saturday night we're excited because there's never been a television show like this okay... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Okay let's see if we can get through one of these skits sketches baby please okay ready c maybe maybe you want me to break uh okay do we go again act on thee my name is lord michaels i'm the producer and creator of saturday night we're excited because there's never been a television show like this okay... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Okay let's see if we can get through one of these skits sketches baby please okay ready c maybe maybe you want me to break uh okay do we go again act on thee my name is lord michaels i'm the producer and creator of saturday night we're excited because there's never been a television show like this okay... Read more

Category: Entertainment

I was fired from this show uh a while ago but if you know don't look that up please welcome to watch mojo and today we're counting down our picks for the beefs conflicts and spats that the legendary nbc sketch show saturday night live is responsible for lauren i need to talk to you you can't let tina... Read more

Category: Gaming

느낌도 있고 어 그리고 제우스는 확실하게 이겨야 한다는 마인드네요네 그리고 지금 벤픽 과정에서 스압이 케이틀린이 미드로 가는 전략이 나왔어요 이건 데스에서 준비된 뭔가가 그 준비된 연구 데이터가 지난 일주일간 있었던 거 같은데 이런 건또 저희가 인게임에서 좀 확인 해 봐야겠죠 마지막에 바뀌죠지가 팀이 가지고 있는 그 무기를 어떻게 어지 양팀의 경기 준비 렸습니다 양팀의 1세트입니다 지금부터 만나보시죠 들이 저도 가능해요 저도 가능해요 뭐 이런 것들이 가능했던게 또 이번 시즌이었기에 있어서 케이틀린 어 그 방면으로 같이 연결해서 나왔다고... Read more

Category: Entertainment

Hey everyone why so glo the sun will come out tomorrow no that's your bottom no hey annie annie annie annie sweetie not the time okay please yeah watch yourself phom had a hard knock life okay someone steps to me i break them okay all right okay Read more

Category: Comedy

-paris hilton, welcome back to the show. you look fantastic, as always. the album is out officially at midnight. right now, it's out. [ cheers and applause ] "infinite icon." pink vinyl. how rad is this? -so sick. -it is sick. -iconic. -how are you? how is the family, by the way? -the family is doing... Read more

Category: Comedy

Justin i'm so sorry for pulling my support from you justin i love you i did it justin because my mps who are threatening to pull me down from a leadership position i can't do that next year justin when i lose elections and you lose elections after i get my full pension we can run away from canada from... Read more

Category: Comedy

-justin, there's so much i have to talk to you about. you've been promoting this film now all over the world. -yes. -where were you just yesterday? -just yesterday, i was in, uh -- in italy. and we just got back last night. yeah. -and you also got engaged, by the way. -yes, thank you. -congratulations.... Read more