*4 HOUR* of Jane Wickline Tiktok Compilation #23 | Jane Wickline Funny Videos 2024

Miss Franklin you just admitted that you saw your sister earlier that night no I just said that I walked back from her house can we read back the minutes me obviously like read back what I've been typing yes okay whenever you're ready so basically she just said she like she walked from the house don't paraphrase totally I walked back from the house and then I went to an address what address 1 2 3 Walnut Road that is not what I said I guess we'll have to strike that from the record I decide to strike things from the record I just need to know does the witness testimony start with the word yes mhm and that's really written down I'm not under oath right no yeah it's there miss Belle where did you complete your certification is um type to learn.com okay I really need us to stay on track yeah um M Franklin earlier you claimed you hadn't seen your sister since the night before well I didn't see her but I saw that the lights were on so I knew she was home I'm sorry can you just go a little slower don't ask the witness questions sorry so yeah I ignored the text cuz I just thought it was kind of creepy you can say that again she's trying to get the witness to repeat the statement cuz she missed it no then I got this text it was in French said a yeah that's that's not going to happen Miss Bell I'm going to have to dismiss you I get it just me I'm solo riter sorry ma'am you have to be 48 in to ride that's a good one not a joke it's just a rule um I'm obviously solidly past 48 in yes that's the issue you have to be exactly 48 why you you just do trust me or what you're decapitated part of the ride involves a blade swinging over the rider's heads kind of right at the 49 in Mark why would you guys put something like that in to make sure no one too talls on there now it doesn't seem like a good business model to me do you have enough people it's an extremely common height among children ages 6 to 10 oh good I'm sure kids ages 6 to 10 love a ride where a blade swings over their head well they appreciate that the blade didn't get them which is more than you would be able to say if you wrote okay um guess I'm just going to go on the ferr with or something now that torso length you're not what is that 17 in I don't know my torso length our feris wheel has a static bladed at the very top that unfortunately decapitates anyone with a torso of over 15 in why well Pretend This is the is the ferris wheel and the blades here the rotation pushes you into the blade no not it's slow but the blade is very sharp no I mean why are you putting blades in all these places and the threat of the blade keeps attendants who are too tall to ride safe from danger but the danger is the blade you can go back and forth on this all day what activities here are safe for me to do you go to the two can Grill oh a restaurant oh no actually I think the 2an grill might have recently installed a blade the carnival Center you could do the limbo game as long as you win because the stick is yeah okay then I will go home oh yeah unfortunately going home is one of our activities that does have a blade hey happy New Year not yet but oh I'm sorry it's the new year for me cuz I'm in a different time zone we're we're in a room together but I grew up in New York huh are you done with your resolutions um yeah here get mozzarella from the store get a basil plant I'm going to make a Capra salad tomorrow her resolution is like committing to taking steps towards like a bigger goal basil is a step towards the larger goal of Capra salad drop off package return at UPS see yeah these are just errands well where did you put I can't tell you that why not you had us do this whole activity I just can't is it because you think it won't come true if you tell me no it's cuz my resolution is at your expense what do you mean it's at my expense don't worry about that why don't you just try again and then be specific about your goals and the times when you'll be pursuing them and out of the house times when I'll be out of the house one idea would be no phone in bed maybe leave phone on the kitchen table every night unlocked this this part of the resolution that's going to be bad for me well these suggestions are good habits to get into regardless I think I might go to bed I feel kind of weird okay good night hey I'll see you in a year you mean you'll see me next year nope is that also part of you'll see you soon enough hey how's it going just heading inside ma'am I know you're a vampire I can't invite you in me yes ma'am I saw you eat that lady over there and then you yelled I'm a vampire I'm a human I'm just like you I love eating bags of garlic and staring into the sun all right well can I see some ID this is [ __ ] okay your name is Lisa Wilson example Jane Doe you forgot to remove the placeholder my name is Lisa Wilson example jandoo you cing what's taking so long yeah one second you have two cats and one dog that's not info and ID should have and you were born in 2009 which would make you 13 could someone Immortal be 13 this is a nightclub okay but we both know I'm not actually 13 no you're a vampire you're being like really mean what's in the back I'm not going to show you because I think it will weaken my case that I'm not a vampire come on okay so it's a rabbit carcass okay vampire but in a way that proves I wasn't going to eat everyone because I brought a snack I was just hoping to dance I've been stressed out lately and I wanted a fun night out sorry you know I can't let you in yeah you're just doing your job can I use your bathroom before I head out yeah go ahead whoa no I didn't mean did you see seriously just say yes to that that wasn't even a real attempt no that doesn't count what do you mean of course it counts I asked and you said yes [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] I won't do anything this time as a cursy but just wow thanks for letting me stay for dinner Mr and Mrs Hill of course are you kidding you're so sweet honey I like her more than that other friend of yours what's her name who Ryland yes Ryland okay please don't rank my friends in front of them mom not yeah cuz now I'm going to tell Ryan your mom likes me more than her don't you dare Brian before we serve plates um we usually like to say a few quick words no pressure to like participate it's fine my family does that too so honey would you like to take it away sure my coworker pansy PCH is an absolute snake she has been timing me while I've been going to the restroom for months and today I finally proved it by stealing and hiding her wrist wash at the beginning of the day all day goes by she doesn't notice 3 p.m. I go pee second I get back she's like where's my wristwatch I'm peeved that was my peeve my peeve for the day is that I got a SE on a test I studied really hard for and I could have been a b but he took off 8% for not writing my name so that's my peeve as for me I made a really beautiful piece of toast and dropped it jamside down right before I was going to take a bite um are you thinking what I'm thinking said a good peeve should be directed at something or someone yours is just your fault I think it's time for you to cry c a river fair is fair here I go all right everybody else is free to serve themselves thank you for picking this all up why is Mr Hill eating an onion cuz he lost does your family use a potato when they do it some families use a potato instead of an onion we don't um I thought I thought you were talking about like s Grace oh prob only eat half of this my stomach's still feeling delicate ooh sorry Ted denied fair enough and you guys do this every time you eat a meal including the onion part pretty much yeah unless some's allergic but none of us are allergic we only make people eat onions who can eat onions all right what are you doing you can't eat that I can't I'm kidding you can just a practical joke oh got me that would be nuts can you imagine Ted maybe focus on the onion rather than the conversation for now Roger that all right Miss gry you're up first which means you're going to have to pull out of this kind of tight spot so start by putting the car in Reverse I can't concentrate because Olivia rolled her window down to mess me up what she rolled down her window so the whooshing sound would distract me and make me fail I roll down the window cuz I was hot she probably thinks me failing will make her more likely to pass that doesn't make any sense yeah I agree I don't think that I'm saying that you think that see this is why we recommend that siblings take the test separately Gertie's obviously just creating an issue cuz she's scared to start the test no ladies ladies there's a way to sort this out that you're not seeing what's the the first thing you do when you get a little hot swimming I'll open my window before that before both of those like putting your hair up like in a ponytail or a little bundle mhm and whose hair is long enough to go in a ponytail Olivia's exactly Olivia's hair is down so that means she's lying about being hot not quite what do you need to put your hair up a scrunchie exactly so if a Olia doesn't have a scrunchie then she couldn't put her hair up even if she felt hot so then she might open a window instead mhm and if she does have one she's choosing to have her hair down meaning she doesn't feel hot and open the window so the whooshing sound would make me fail Bingo what that doesn't this is ridiculous well then just show me you don't have a scrunchie and then I will heartily agree with you see no scrunchies happy almost just need to take a look inside that bag fine I'm going to submit a complaint about you as soon as we get back aha oh what's that doing there also there are like a ton of used tissues in here okay you got me I wanted the whooshed sound to make Gertie fail Olivia I'm very disappointed in you and Gertie you passed but I haven't taken the test yet this was the test we're down to our bottom two contestants of the round Debbie Amy and sky sky it means I'm going to eat you for breakfast [ __ ] why are you being like mean it's smack talk jokes jokes sky this week you designed a gorgeous ball gown made from hundreds of pressed flowers your mother saved in your childhood would you wo together into a sturdy fabric yes I wanted to really honor her lovely Debbie Amy yep used the majority of this week's stipend to bribe Sky into giving you her leftover flower fabric to honor her mom which you then taped onto a pair of shorts that we know you didn't design for this round because you've worn them every day since the show began yeah but shorts don't get stinky as fast as shirts do you can like wear them a couple times in our Second Challenge Sky designed a lilac pants suit for her niece's prom to me family has everything Debbie Amy you said that the most powerful fashion statement is a smile sure and spent you're a lot of time in the park throwing pennies at birds with your brother-in-law well it's actually it's better to do that than throwing bread cuz it's like a teach a man to fish kind of thing are you suggesting that pigeons can learn to buy bread no Daniel explains it really smart you have a crush on your sister's husband nuh-uh I don't I get him better than my sister does is all I said all right well it's time for the verdict the winner by a hair is Debbie Amy what don't let the door hit you on your way out [ __ ] she didn't make anything let's just say she gave me the rest of her stipend and asked me to reconsider it was $45 you're a multi-millionaire yes but it was in cash and my son needs lunch money for a field trip tomorrow this is season 85 Sky you got to think bigger than just making the clothes okay well our host's husband is actually sorry someone did the cusher that thing a couple seasons ago oh okay I'll go and don't let the door hit you on the way out [ __ ] yeah you said that [Music] already what the hell what I found um a star no that's really groundbreaking no it like like a star what does that mean can you just come look okay whoa what the hell right are you thinking what I'm thinking here I mean I think I am these are the kinds of moments that like Define lifetimes I'm drafting an emo to the department head dear Dr SEL my colleague and I have made a discovery that requires your immediate attention Robbie come on no this is all you no I want to we're doing this together now Robbie I don't say it enough you're all right flatter me um do you want to try taking the next section yeah um okay naturally our initial conclusion is that an alien species has disguised itself as one of the atmospheric objects most familiar to humans the star in order to spy on us from a comfortable distance how's that stop me if you want to change anything no that's good we believe our new neighbors mistakenly used our five-pointed visual Shand for Star as a model for their cover rather than an image of an actual star we recommend Swift and serious attention to what we humbly propose being named how about bn's crazy star yes love Robie and Bridget is love too familiar for an email to a supervisor do you think there's no time for edits okay send it send send send send do you want to look at each other from either side of the telescope so one of us is Tiny and one giant I think that email we just sent is going to have to be bumped to your second best idea of the day okay I call little side oh no who's that hey rabbie is there a sticker we're going to have to resign yeah we're probably going to have to resign so I see you're pretty recently started um 7 months on the 31st you usually ask that people wait a full year after death before requesting a face to face like this I know that I just feel like the circumstances are a little unusual as I'm sure you know from my file um I died after slipping on a decorative cobweb at a Halloween party and then bleeding out because everyone thought it was part of my costume yeah I'm sorry yes tragic I'm here sort of to beg you to make an exception to your appearance rule I had an inkling it might be one of of those it kind of um hugely diminishes my spooking Authority when I look like this and I do wish I could help but unfortunately all ghosts must stay in their dying outfit for eternity that's clearly not in force what about you I died in this really we get appointed for life down there so it's more common than you'd think there's this family that just moved into the house I was assigned and you know what the kid said to the mom the other day what he said I keep seeing the ketchup lady and it's buming me out what's funny is that if you had just gone for a traditional scary costume Halloween element would be an advantage for you well it was a couple's costume my boyfriend was mustard I think people get that you're ketchup no I know that it's not about getting it I just meant that it's one of those costumes it's kind of not doesn't feel like a complete costume on its own yeah that makes sense so what should I do I mean I guess you could incorporate ketchup as a theme into your haunting act incorporate ketchup into my haunting act no I'm sorry um here's what I can do if you're willing to wait a few months I'm sure this coming Halloween a few mustard un costumed people will die I could assign one of them to you okay it might be nice to have a buddy and then the costume would be more as you said cohesive I mean again I would really rather just take this off even just a hat it's so itchy listen that's what I'm able to offer you right now you can take it or leave it do you want me to sign you a dead mustard person yeah I guess that would be better than nothing cool I'll make a not still stuck only come unstuck if it thinks you're worthy okay I want to try something what I told you I'm not stealing that bag of money what are you doing why not stealing is fun what's better than personal game it would be wrong and I'm not punching that old woman either curse you and your Ironclad [ __ ] I'm going to stab you oh no I have nothing to defend myself with I guess I'll try the sword if it's stuck then you're toast whoa I did not expect that to work yeah what the hell you just um you're just pretending wasn't actually going to stab Pat you dumb sword I feel bad for tricking the sword I do too sword I'm going to put you back cuz if I'm really honest with myself think there's someone out there way more worthy than me that's very honorable of you actually thanks what if it making that choice you proved yourself worthy for real and I just went like really I sword I'm like not a great person it's true we live together like I'm certainly flattered but I feel like you got to be way more Discerning wait I want to try something put it try putting back again okay okay we're mean okay it's stuck we're nice so I guess the sword's kind of easy to get two three hey next down the aisle us congrats you two this is not good how do we want to play this if I knew I'd tell you and now I just wanted to do a really quick thank you all for coming there's been a mistake it's been so special to get to celebrate with all the people that we love the most I said there's been a mistake is is everything okay over there um I'm going to go up there and sort this out babe okay stay calm okay why why is that person standing up auntie and I appreciate the gesture we do but you've picked the wrong people sweetie it's okay it's just a goofy tradition you you don't actually have to get married hey is this still working test test um I just wanted to say that Liv and I are having a blast tonight but as for the next down the aisle thing it's really too soon for us to be making that kind of decision Andy and I only started dating 4 months ago that's true are things going well sure I didn't even go so far as to say they're going great the other day we went bowling together and we both stink but it was a lot of fun honey who are these people oh I'm Andy um Kevin and I worked together a few years ago okay I'm a little surprised I made the cut even at the time we Kevin and I were not that close do you mind if I do the rest of my speech now oh yeah sorry back to you okay six months ago the doctors told my father that he had less than a month to live and today he walks me down the aisle oh come on I know what you're getting at excuse me life is short nothing is guaranteed me and Andy should get married we already told you it's too soon we don't know yet this is just a story about how I'm happy my father is with me on my wedding day if he's as great a guy as you seem to think he is then he'll respect our wishes to do this in our own time excuse me um are you trying to steal my bike no what are you trying to steal my bike Oh I thought this was my bike really yeah I must have gotten mixed up this is the only bike parked here well I locked my bike like right by this spot M so if it's not here then you're not the only one dealing with a bike Thief so I am dealing with a bike Thief no hi I'm leaving now oh thank you yeah I feel so old I'm sorry I'm running late but I'll be there soon and I'll pretend to be surprised really wait no turn around was your plan to ride it away while my back was turned slightly away from you how do you know this isn't mine what I don't know I know the combination I know the combination I saw you try 1 2 3 4 just now okay well what kind of person is late for their own surprise party yeah I'm also not going to take feedback from you as someone who's trying to rob me okay whatever makes so much sense that you're a Taurus what does that mean there's more to life than just material things and possessions yeah well what can I say I love stuff Brian I said I'm coming well it's my birthday also I shouldn't have to bring beer to a party that I wasn't supposed to know about Just for future reference recognize this how did you May 2nd May 2nd principal Edgar have a seat Joy am I in trouble you're here because of that little stunt you pulled this morning at the science fair oh miss Kendrick said it would be okay for me to Joey are you familiar with NASA um yeah um they do space stuff I'd like to introduce you to my colleague Dr James L McIntyre how do you do Joey hi Dr M runs an Elite Training Program for precocious young minds interested in rocket science oh cool Joey I hope you know this isn't something we do every day your project was one of the most most brilliant I've ever seen my baking soda volcano if that's your name for it then yes oh I didn't name it that I actually didn't come up with it I found it on um easyscience for kids.net that's the thing it's not easy science for most kids Joey Joey is extremely modest Joey I'd like to pull you out of school and give you a full ride to NASA's tiny genius program I'm sorry principal Edgar's is he talking about my project mine was the papier-mâché Mound with like the dish soap I'm not a chemist so you'll have to save the sciencey lingo for Dr M papier-mâché ah we're definitely talking about you and your project Joey Joey don't argue with a professional giving you recognition no I'm not I'm sorry I'm just surprised well I know I was surprised when I saw that bubbling potion shoot out of that little mountain I didn't even really do the demonstration right I mixed the Caps up on the food coloring so the lava was blue instead of red Joy I don't have a lot of time so you're going to need to tell me if you accept sure yeah I'll do it it sounds fun I'm so glad okay Joey that's all for now Dr M will be in touch soon okay I think we found our Star Commander that little boy has no idea that the fate of mankind rests on his shoulders lemonade sure that'll be um 50 cents okay are your kids inside my kids yeah for the um um for the stand my stupid big brother is inside if that's what you mean no I just um just cuz you seem a little old to be running lemonade standand what do you mean ah who am I you just had a hand mirror on your person this doesn't make any sense okay I guess I'm just a little confused sorry something very strange has just happened to me remind me who you are you said do you want to buy some lemonade and I said sure right well since you're an adult I guess since we're adults I should probably offer you an alcohol lemonade is that how this works regular lemonade is fine pH I mean I could have different to the store I just didn't want to because of gas prices hey is this one of those things where um a teen switches lives with an adult to learn a lesson pardon you know like 13 Going on 30 a classic when we're both old enough to watch it's not that inappropriate of a movie but to answer your question yes that does seem to be what's happening now I'm no longer 13 but a modern adult woman no offense I'm sort of short on time I don't really care about the specifics but I would love some lemonade if you still have that oh yeah sure here thank you 13 is already kind of old for a lemonade stand I know I'm terrified of change and have been lashing out at my best friend for losing interest in our favorite childhood activities that's the lesson the troll I suspect is responsible for this body swap is trying to impart all right cool anyway that'll be $100 no $10 I already paid you you said 50 yeah when I thought it was 2005 okay $10 okay we're going to do a quick two-minute free write Miss King are you going to want us to read these aloud it's up to you just whichever feels more comfortable all right starting the clock when I was a little girl we had a rocking horse named maragold even at the time it was a decrepit thing um excuse me hm would you mind keeping it down just a little bit what a strange thing to say to me is it maragold would have buckled under the weight of a three-year-old but my mother insisted that we keep her hey um is this are you finding this distracting what the mirac gold tough oh I'm sorry I I've sort of been focusing I haven't really been paying attention it's really not Michelle yeah if you've chosen to write privately that's fine but you should be writing not disrupting others but 1 minute left I have a classmate named Michelle like the song and she's how can I put this insufferable hey I think she's jealous although whether of me or of maragold I can't say this K she's writing about me Michelle focus on your own work it's just hard to focus with all this rocking horse stuff oh wow I'm actually riding about a rocking horse too that's a great example of parallel thinking it's not parallel thinking if one of them was saying the thing aloud let's all take a deep breath and maybe spend a minute brainstorming some ways that we can be more respectful class mates okay and are you going to have us say them aloud or just whichever feels more comfortable for you it would be easier to be a respectful classmate to Michelle if I respected Michelle food snack thanks are you auditioning I don't know I'm pretty shy yeah well who isn't besides don't the good parts usually go to popular kids like Hannah M give me one reason why the shouldn't be someone like you or me well I'm not really a team player and I can't like hear pitch differences that was rhetorical oh what does not a team player mean like I'm um like I'm willing to sell out my peers to get ahead and I can't feel empathy which can make me fall kind of flat in emotional scenes that's a weird thing to say hi Hannah no I'm not auditioning this year I'm just here I'm just here to say hi to friends relax it's only a play right psycho so what was last spring I was tooo shy to apologize to her for what I did to her vocal cords right before the audition she's perfect what did you do to her vocal cords last call for auditions it's now or never I mean there's no harm in giving it a shot right I'd have to miss most of the rehearsals so I don't want to get the part and then like leave them in a bind oh I play club soccer pretty seriously why are you here well I did something to Bryce's vocal cords and I want I just want to see how it plays out out okay you're a psychopath last call yeah I'm coming good luck hope you liked the fruit snack oh my god did you no I'm sorry that was it I'm kidding I didn't do anything to the fruit snack um good luck though I I hope you get it okay thanks who's winning that depends want to get a drink later are you hitting on me during your big tournament maybe I am yeah I'll I'll get a drink with you great martine's at 7 okay I'll give you this one for free wow Checkmate what what you're in a corner see the knights oh my God I thought the horse was the queen oh my God sorry I I don't really play chess so then why did you move it seems like the hot thing to do does that count when a player's date flirtatiously moves a piece on players behalf that move is binding so what's the damage there was money on this not not a ton $500 drinks on me I guess now there whatever happens I just want to say it's been a real privilege to go on this journey with you privilege and a doubt but far from a joy you can say that again those who say the joys in the journey have never had to eat a scorpion for a piece of map should be right around this corner hey does the map say that there should be a girl there no it doesn't hello good afternoon Miss um would you mind taking a couple steps to the right we come to uncover Galloway's treasure no same you're also uncovering Galloway's treasure I mean I think so Gallow treasure coordinates 1468 3 yep that's them how did you get here you know it's been a journey of a day the last clue was in blue bottom which is this bar um in the West Village West Village frankly like six of the clues have been different bars so I'll say it I'm drunk we're onun an island I know no one let me drive the boat back right what do we do here I don't know wait are you guys not here for aon's bachelorette thing no then how did you find it we've been studying um the life of Elliot Galloway for the last two years Ms WR his PhD on quests as sort of a rejection of modernity well Ms better hope that team skank didn't get here before I did cuz they left the wig store first can I see that sure Find Galloway treasure take picture with Balto statue this is not even the destination of this scavenger hunt oh this is embarrassing is this like your guys's whole day for this next one I'm going to need a volunteer from the audience how about two we just need one we're a package deal okay why not come on up both of you come on up you won't regret this all right so I have this deck I'm going to ask you guys to pick a card which which one of us would you say um it doesn't really either of you should I thing is I kind of want to myself well I kind of want to too you pull it from the deck and I'll read it aloud we've decided that I'm going to pull the card out of the deck and then Jamie is going to read it yes I heard you here goes nothing five in your head Jamie five of don't you dare say the suit I want to we're definitely going to have to do it over regardless so it doesn't the suit doesn't matter you hold it in don't say the suit five them clubs no man I said the suit now the trick is ruined or is it Jamie what could you possibly be getting at I might have a chck of my own was this your card yes I mean it's your card five of clubs is what you said it was Jamie that was amazing how did you do it a magician never tells somehow we saved the show no we saved the show hey hey what's up so I have sort of an um awkward question what is it so I know um um you and Max sort of have uh uhhuh I guess and it's Pro probably not even worth making a whole like I feel silly like running it by you but you want to ask her out on a date but seriously if it would if it would be even like a little bit weird for you I'll totally no and I don't want to be the person who's like I'm forbidding you from talking to her cuz like you know she's an adult obviously you're an adult like yeah it's it's always such a like weird little dance my only thing that make like if I'm really honest with myself would make me feel a little weird no that's what I want I want you to be 100% thank you um it's just that we we just got married yeah so for you guys to start seeing each other like at this particular moment would be and like I hate to use this word an affair yeah like for lack of a better word it would be an affair no I totally get it and again my friendship with you is much more important to me than this affair would be thank you if you guys are ever looking for a guest star you know who to call oh you're first on our list I mean it I'm just going to start by asking you some questions okay cool um what's your drug use like um light I would say light okay great um and any marijuana like every once in a while but not really okay cool would you say like in the last 30 days not in the last 30 days no so down the hall there is a bathroom and there's some contain containers and you I'm sure you've peed in a cup before um so just yeah that's the last step and then you're free to go really already yep usually I'm asked a lot more questions and then like my reflexes are checked and my like blood pressure is taken you know we just we can get all of that from U from the pee you can get my reflexes for my pee yes this is sort of an out there question are you trying to get my P um to pass a drug test ah can't lie to you okay yes is that okay sure um yeah I I mean I wish you hadn't tried to trick me but totally but yeah I you know I don't believe in workplace drug testing no me neither um the test is for my my husband um he you know he he gets migraines um the other day he was like do you know someone who whose PE I could use and I was like um Robert no profession in the world has more access to pee than mine hey can I give you some constructive feedback sure yeah so I think what tipped me off is that you only ask me questions about my PE that's exactly what the last person said they're like is this for a drug test yeah you know you could just like pepper in some other like standard checkup questions like food and exercise that's smart yeah you know I sometimes also get migraines oh say no more really I literally just tried to trick you into giving me um your clean pee no it's it's true you did it's at least I can do are you almost finished just about wait don't move don't move for a second oh sorry how does it look I think we're going to have to do another one what just your eyes are closed in this what do you mean my eyes are closed you must have blinked I didn't realize it until I've been sitting here for 2 weeks I don't know how to tell you I just paint what's in front of me just let me I'm sure it's not that bad can I just see it no it's not to my standards I just want to see it I promise you you're going to be like oh man I blinked you have to imagine what it would look like if your eyes were open okay fine be one of my favorite portraits yet if not for the eyes are you kidding no I mean it the eyes are the windows to the soul this is horrible that's rude you didn't give me a nose do is implied how is the only color blue when there's so many colors in your palette mix a lot of colors together try to get blue which did not work and then I found some blue in my drawer I'm not paying for this it's not my fault you don't how to keep your eyes open oh wow look at that I guess rules are rules oh that's not very good why did you do that because I got caught under the mistletoe that's not what you do when you oh do you play mistletoe with different rules there aren't different rules you you're just supposed to kiss me that's kind of awkward for you mistletoe is poisonous cuz you thought I was going to are you okay yeah um I feel still kind of dizzy and there's like a faint white tunnel in the distance but I'm not I'm not going towards it okay I'm calling 911 911 hey U my friend just ate mistletoe oh did they play the other version what is this other version see that must been pretty awkward for you it was really awkward okay can you just tell me if my friend is going to die sorry no yeah I'm listening what should we do is it serious there's only one cure a Christmas Kiss what no I'm kidding um see if you can get them to throw up can you describe the vehicle it's big and shiny and looking at it felt like I was looking death right in the face like the the model or the color I didn't get a good enough look for anything like that but it's exhaust pipe was on the top of it like a hat okay and it was sort of cylindrical I was towing a bunch of wheeled containers behind it are you describing a train I don't think so did it look sort of like this a little for these kinds of things it's pretty difficult to make a case that the train is at fault it came out of nowhere on tracks though right I don't know I don't spend every second of every stage checking to see if I'm on train tracks maybe you should is there someone higher ranking I could talk to like a fireman no please don't call my fireman boss um we can tell is here well then help me out getting hit by a train it's not like getting hit by a soccer ball or your little sister can kill you in a matter of seconds what are you saying to me you seem and don't take this the wrong way very up and atam excuse me I was just run over by run over the train ran over you it hit me my hand it hit your hand kind of banged on the side of it as it passed me by sort of like hey watch where you're going I guess hearing myself say it I'm a little to blame too okay I won't press charge if the train doesn't I'll let you know if the train calls okay I'm going to go hey you'll make fireman someday thanks I'm glad we're doing this me too be possible for you to turn the heat up a tiny bit of course yeah thanks Luna turn up the heat okay turning the temperature up very fancy right yeah it's new watch this okay Luna could you please play some music you got it Luna who are you talking to in there I'm on a work call with the girl shush I'm unmuting myself what kind of music surprise us what does that mean I don't know what is surprise music has this happened before babe I came in here to say I rebooted the connection so it's about to cut up I already did it so how's work that was really weird what the um the Luna thing yes and know I'm still getting used to it it's a little futuristic it sounded like real people talking no it's just the way it's programmed it's supposed to sound like real people talking mom I can't hear them hey bud you have a kid oh I have a bunch of kids okay made up a dance if you want to see it I'm Doug nice to meet you we' love to see your dance kid Luna can you make a gesture cool moves dou test test test hello are you getting anything Wi-Fi is bad it's back in here too are you are you hearing this I hate to shoot but when people don't watch Doug's dances his feelings get hurt oh okay is the kid doing that dance again yeah the one with the spin he going to be so weird when he grows up what do you think surprise music is I just simply don't know greeting cards that play a song when you open that's a good idea right or like tiptoeing sounds yeah maybe Doug show her your spin move there's that you just did the spin right mhm great Luna have you found that music yet oh my God good playing surprise music for case is serious is this one we didn't want to take any chances okay you three are the best the how here of course led the landmark um investigation in AER Michael Bell the most acclaimed private detective in New York it's an honor to be here and of course there's no need to introduce Sammy Sala fast I'll get to the bottom of this the first killing that we know of Sor to interrupt surgeon um I think there is a need to introduce I also would actually love to hear a little bit more of course um detective would you like to introduce yourself sure my name's Sammy but my friends call me puzzle piece my crack's the case of the cookie Crook and I busted the birthday Bandit detective Samuel is the absolute best hey I just follow the clues so the first killing in two sons say um that you're a pi sort of I solved neighborhood mysteries for 50 cents Sergeant what is going on here is there a problem yeah kind of there is in the sense that you seem to have hired a cartoon I assure you detective s is as legitimate as the nose on my face now I'm asking you all to refrain from interjecting unless you have something useful to say think the Pennsylvania murder is not connected it's a goose chase and we should stop wasting resources on it I agree I think we should focus on charmine and Sammy I say check the scene of the crime for Footprints oh my God sometimes Footprints leading away from a crime scene can lead you right the person you're looking for sergeant detectives my next idea is to see whether any of the suspects claim to have been somewhere on February 29th sure that could have been true in a leap year how old are you yeah I that depends should I include my half birthday sorry gentlemen I have to take this detective solves it fast you talk fast and I'll do the solves in it if you don't dismiss the child detective I'm going to find out who the murderer is and I'm going to team up with them me too I will too you're all used to being number one so I expected some headbutting at first Roger that it was my mom she says I have a piano lesson I have to come home immediately wait till you return to resume things are you serious thanks AR and I can't wait to get back to it wow they really don't make them like that anymore I'm scared it's going to be cold listen the faster you do it the faster you'll get it over with okay you guys are definitely going to go after me though right um this isn't like a prank where I'm going jump in and then you guys are going to be like oh my God she actually did it and then I'm like all wet for the rest of the afternoon listen I hate to be the one to I I think it's important for you to know before this happens is sort of like a one-way ticket type of thing what does that mean is this the kind of plank where I mean yeah yeah Stevie it's like a pirate plan it is sorry Stevie we thought we yeah it's not Frank we hung out like this morning yeah I thought it was super weird that you seemed enthusiastic about the idea did you all like know that this is what was happening we thought it was pretty clear I mean you can't swim so I assumed you had picked somewhere shallow enough to stand because you knew that about me and we're friends middle of the ocean it's obviously not shallow enough to stand I don't know Frank maybe my depth perception isn't amazing tied behind your back I thought that was like hooky hazing really mean to Blindside you I think it was an honest mistake like what are the two rules of being a pirate come on Stevie don't do this what are they have fun and be safe have fun and be safe is this safe safe no it's not safe is this fun like a little for me I obviously I'm not having fun guess if I try to put myself in your shoes I could see how it wouldn't be listen why don't you come back up here and we can talk about it yeah we we probably should have gone about this better don't be a sore winner just I want this to be a learning experience for you I'm going to [Music] jump guys I changed my mind can you pull me up hi trick- or treat how can I help you a treat ideally Halloween was yesterday I couldn't go yesterday cuz I had to take my kids trick-or-treating classic yeah I mean I do mostly think of it as an activity for kids I hate to Resto um I have to go to work right after this are you even wearing a costume no I'm not going to show up to work in a costume on a day that isn't Halloween hey can I hop on this trick-or treat what is going on have you has she never heard of trick-or-treating know it's like a huge thing what are you supposed to be um a human being just trying to find a little joy and Community before a long day at work what are you supposed to be wait it's 8 in the who is that trick-or-treaters it's not Halloween I know what's your name I'm Annie oh my God my name is Anette I feel like I never meet other Annies people used to call me Annie really yeah when I was a kid what's going on we're trick-or-treating and this lady I presume is your wife is being very difficult oh my God are you Jeff Hanley yes I'm Annette Gerard I'm from uh Lance and belfon we actually have a meeting later today oh hi what are you doing here she's trick-or-treating have you even been listening we'll get out of your hair we just making the rounds and it has a couple locks from here that gives out king-sized ones oh let's go there see it three Mr Hanley okay okay um extra number four that's me we're going to need you to just like make small talk with Bella until Damen um says his line oh I was told I would have a non-speaking role yeah I mean what you're saying isn't going to be important we just need like background party chitchat okay okay action can't believe we're graduating so soon [Music] if I don't get my grade up in AB science stat they're not going to let me read my poem at graduation and I've been working on it for months it Rhymes in everything sorry do you hear that I know if I can just get it in front of an audience I'll be fine the thing is I just don't understand precipitation Bella I didn't think you came to these things I'm sorry I forgot my line okay extra number four some of that stuff seemed a little out of left field I'm not a writer I'll follow a script to the end of the Earth but let's try another and just keep it simple okay action visiting my grandmother tomorrow your grandmother is one of the school's biggest donors yes could she put in a good word about my poem what a good word about my poem the poem you're were talking about in the last take if I can't read my poem at graduation that's months combing over a Runing dictionary out the window should I slap her no Bella why would you ask if you could slap me just felt like the natural progression of the conversation didn't think you came to these things but this isn't working we could bring someone else in where'd you get that dress um I think thrifted so cute thanks there that that's the kind just do that when we're rolling this wasn't acting Dana this was a real conversation it's a real conversation it will be believable to the audience so that's brilliant yeah well because the most realistic fiction of all is the truth mhm let's go again action how are you today I overheard some producers saying they're killing off your character in next week's episode really oh they're super worried about how you're going to take it oh my God Bella Dana is this real oh my God cut that don't feel good to me Dana Lisa come to the window that boy is trouble rert you've just broken my window sorry Lisa I guess I picked too big of a pebble I don't know how I'm going to explain this to my parents I'll tell them I'll explain that it was my fault you're a real gentleman rert is that their room right next to yours yes but wait rert just come through the door rert you broke a second window I know but I didn't mean to rert you've just broken two windows right in a row and I'm kicking myself for it what the hell is going on don't worry mother it's not an intruder rert here just picked too big of a pebble you scared me half to death I'm sorry Mrs Callin if you're going to throw a pebble out a window make sure to pick the size always go a little smaller than you think could I try again on your Attic Window I don't see why not mother well only if he's sure he has a feel for the red siiz Pebble now certainly Mrs Callin and I think this one will be just right that one was too big too there are some more windows in the downstairs part of the house try those but rert are you terribly sure that now you have the right Pebble size down Does this answer your question my love no it doesn't no try that one one right below no home would be complete without some tasteful decorations but generally speaking do people prefer base of flowers or lamb I decided to take matters into my own hands and took a poll of 15 people walking past my bench in the park the numbers don't lie four people said flowers three people said lamp seven people said that it's sort of an apples and oranges type of question to all of whom I said that no tomorrow's pool is apples and orang es one man with a Shifty smile said excuse me have you seen a beautiful woman with a wide brimmed hat I said who's asking he said oh she must have gotten to you first the name is Bradford and whatever she's told you at me don't believe it I said listen if you had to pick between a vase of flowers and a lamp for decoration which would you pick and he said what and I said if you had to pick between of it and he said no I heard you it's just it's sort of an apples and oranges type of question but that's not important did the woman leave a message for me and I said yes she told me to give you the address 261 marraine and to say that there will be consequences then he said Tony lemlin has just eaten his last breakfast after which I felt sort of bad about giving him the real address I guess you really can't beat the smell of fresh flowers pencils and pens both come in many colors but which do people really prefer when it comes down to it I decided to take matters into my own hands and took a poll of 17 people walking past me in the park three said pencils five said pens eight people were either walking too fast or pretended not to hear me one woman wore a beautiful dress and a wide Red Hat as she passed me by she ticked the hat ever so slightly and in that moment I forgot my own name vague Recollections of why I was here half forms images of writing utensil slam about my mind but I couldn't form a single word then she said in a voice that said shivers down my spine I'm looking for a man named Bradford please if you see him pass along the address 261 Lorraine along with the message there will be consequences then I let out the biggest vag fart that the world has ever seen the thing about a vagina fart is that you can't control it in the way that you can control a fart that comes from your butt she gave me a look of disgust and disappeared into the crowd the winner by a landslide is pen really yeah I'm new and you ladies look like the alphas around here so I'll let you be my friend for now C's might get degrees but only a listers can hang out with a top dog like Zoe Z why are you looking at each other like that it's just um being like rymy I don't understand it Kevin oh my God such an icon Kevin let's steal his phone and then send scandalous pictures to the whole town wo weren't we doing bullying just now not like that though not like crimes yeah we more like imply a coldness over the course of several years I don't understand so if someone says I'm really into theater you would say and say bye-bye birdie get out of my sight no anything goes except for those shoes no wrong watch this do it again okay I'm really into theater oh see wow that was so mean right yeah I got the chills now she's kind of I kind of like her that's more like it now after school let's go make some memories We Won't Remember at the VIP section of the busy be anyone who's anyone is there we have volleyball we're not really old now 14 you're 14 yeah how old are you I'm 28 is everyone here 14 is everything okay yeah well whoever he is he isn't worth your while thanks how do you know listen we girls need to look out for each other I've had a really bad day so thank you for being so nice I'm Maya nice to meet you you want to talk about it really yeah whatever it is you can trust me I'm sure I've done worse okay I killed someone by mistake what I know um I thought you meant you like um like got in a fight with your boyfriend yeah well that's how it started and you know one thing led to another and you killed him but like you said earlier we girlies this is obviously not at all what I meant by that his name was Mac Betha it was about 510 briish eyes um no don't give me details sorry I always overshare what I'm tipsy let's just say I don't want to Aiden to bet you I understand I had the evidence in my backyard oh my God stop telling me stuff I just contact hey hey ladies everything okay in here mhm great in fact it's one of those nights you could say that do you want to talk about it is the sky no I think we're I'd love to that's not necessary use another op F I love a bathroom Heart to Heart me too girly this a drama okay I killed someone by mistake my boyfriend Mac Beth andol he's 5 fo 10 what Maya is helping me through it though no I'm not I'm not helping she's been great what did you say your last name was you guys killed someone no we're not together I just got here hi ladies are we having a secret meeting in here oh no everything is fine and normal in here to for sure seems like I walked into something we're talking about how I accidentally killed my boyfriend Mac Beth size 10 Brown hey hey you talking to me what is that what are you doing hideing inside okay okay no ignore this guy hide inside okay right yeah what you can't give me signs oh okay I'll stop I'm I'm sort of in the middle of something if I get on base keep an eye out yes I know that cuz I'm allowed to steal between pitches what that means strike two what are you doing I was still telling you the plan we're not on the same team yes we are we are on opposing teams what about this guy no not on your team either what about those guys can someone please tell me which one of you are on my team no one who's on the field right now is on your team it's me against all of you it's like the sixth that just doesn't seem very fair to me no scientist I'm going to need like a few minutes to look at a rule book and then I'll be right strike three Mom and Dad yeah I have something to tell you what's up sweetie I'm adopted what oh this is a lot to process well that's great we love you no matter what of course thanks Mom no obviously we love you that's not what I it's it's just what your father is trying to say is it's great that you feel comfortable sharing that part of yourself with us I mean it's not what I would have yeah thanks guys that means a lot have you always been adopted come on Bill what kind of question is that I'm just trying to I'm sorry I don't know um for a long time I just felt kind of different from you don't have to explain yourself okay thanks I guess if we're airing things out might be a good time to tell you that you are gay oh I know that I figured that out years ago how Mom told me she was asking why there weren't any baby pictures honey we were going to talk about this as a family okay next up for our dunk tank raffle is Miss Olsen thanks principal be I'm only principal on the weekday today call me Carl okay Carl I'm very nervous don't worry Miss o Ella R is there an Ella are around yeah you're older than I expected but hello Janine oh no listen we asked adults not to couldn't resist I bought 1,000 tickets this is supposed to be from Miss olsson's second graders it's okay we actually know each other okay in fact I want to watch her Miss and I want to watch her drown treat her like any other entrance Carl do it Carl just go ahead and read the questions okay um under why is miss olssen my favorite teacher you wrote Janine Olsen ruined my life that's right and I do it again she seduced my father as he was dying Carl and convinced him to leave everything to her everything I loved him more than the 6 months that we knew each other than you did in your whole goddamn life okay I'm sensing a lot of rage maybe we should take a step back or I'll give you the ball okay you're a psycho and your dad thought so too this for my father you gold digging [ __ ] God n man ha can I try again no Carl can I be in charge of the tank tomorrow no you obviously are fired what's a gold digging [ __ ] hi Mom hi kiddo what's the matter no one gave my sock puppet party guess I'm just not a cool kid oh don't say that hey champ hi what's wrong no one came to Mason sock puppet party I invited the whole class you know what my name is Mr sock and I think Mason is the coolest kid in town oh you're just saying that and my name is Dr sock and I used to be the best surgeon in the world had ever seen they took my my license away after I came into work one day high out of my mind whirling the scalpel about drugs are fun but they'll ruin your life what are you doing I don't know where that came from I was trying to do a teaching moment and then okay we'll just try it Mason I might just be a sock but I know you're going to land on your feet you really think so I might just be a stinky little sock from the bottom of the pile but even I know that when you're addicted to Life in the Fast Lane there's no turning back I'd kill to read on one more patient what if we each said something we love about Mason I guess I just won't take any narrative license then for example I love how good Mason is at sharing I love how Mason reminds me of a stage in my life when I felt like I was invincible I had a brain and a heart I knew the anatomy of both inside and out Mom what's going on I feel like I can see the socks whole life mapped out right in front of me I don't know you know what Jane is been great living as star player Cliff Dino Boy these last couple weeks but I have to be honest about who I am a beautiful girl with long hair coach you didn't let me on the team didn't give me the time of day when I was Jan the girl it was more because you refused to come to any practices I have a thing on W days also you were bullying Kyle did Kyle complain to you yeah as a matter of fact he did don't tell her how you're little piece of [ __ ] you know that Kyle Kyle I'm going to pour a bunch of frozen peas in your locker after this man don't do that every time you open your locker for the rest of your life it's just going to be peas everywhere I'm save this conversation for after the game I'm sure you love that coach let's listen to the star player after she saved all of our butts in the court that's another thing you keep saying I don't know if star player is Jason's the star what did you say Kyle nothing yeah that's what I thought coach I am going to have to leave early today you know apparently he used a turkey baster to make this I didn't know that are you a tour guide here no I'm just just a fan of art I'm Amy nice to meet you Amy what do you think of this piece here I don't know the squiggles don't really do it for me TR to feel like I could do that do you live around here I don't think you could do this what I don't think you could do this oh I I was just kidding I'm not I'm not an artist I'm sure I couldn't actually see how sharp the lines are even in areas where it's like all jumbled up that's hard to do totally yeah I believe it I bet the guy who made this work really hard on it and I bet he's also really good at clarinet but he doesn't like to play in public because I'm too shy are you Jackson poock what me yeah why would you think something like that you got super weird and defensive when I said that looked easy it's not easy to do he needs three different brush sizes it's called Controlled Chaos Mr poock we're going to need you to keep it down sorry Carrie okay fine it's me I wear this hat so no one will recognize me I don't think people really know what you look like what Jackson po looks like that's what I've been saying to him but under my disguise I'm just a guy with feelings feelings that you hurt just hang around here by your painting and like wait for people to say stuff about it yeah he's here like every day I have a lot of free time it does not take long to make these hey Gary can I use the bathroom in your office absolutely not it's worth a shot excuse me what's the date it is July 24th this is going to sound like a weird question but the year what's the year 2021 of course oh my my God Hey listen have you been to Ricky's pizza chicken what no I haven't okay cuz I don't want to freak you out I have a coupon for free pizza chicken and it's like totally free you don't have to buy anything first thank you I just I'm a little distracted I've just traveled a long way not distance exactly but I've traveled in another way if you want it it's yours are you like a promoter for this place or no I'm just a fan and I have an extra one the thing about Ricky's piece of chicken is they don't take card so they don't have an ATM so if you go and you don't have your card there's like nothing even around which is why the coupon is really good cuz it's like your set you don't have to pay for anything first I just don't I don't see myself having time I'm I need to stop something from happening something that going to sound crazy will alter the course of human history Ricky's pizza chicken will alter the course of human history what's a pizza chicken I know you're probably thinking pizza with chicken on it and Ricky it's chicken with Pizza on it which is crazy but it's it's good one of these glasses is poisoned with iane powder you can pick either glass babe I got this I'm totally going to save you cool choose carefully because oh you're just going for it what's he doing he drank one of them already what one of them was poison think about it for a second don't need to I spent the last 2 years building up a tolerance Denine powder I said ioane niine aaine what's the difference does that change anything yeah it's just a completely different poison I'm not immune to this I'm not immune to this what if I told you that I switched the glasses you drank done that like immediately acting like you've been poisoned I totally switched the glasses oh this is sad and so you've drank the poison not me okay take another sip mhm babe you don't have you for a second I feel good I haven't written anything new should we just do one of our old songs I guess I wrote a song guys really I know just the drummer but just the drummer you're a very important part of this band okay here's here's the a section I I don't have it all figured out yet don't do disclaimers just go for it I'm sure it's great okay so how it goes it's sort of like and then it's like is that is that the drum part no that's like that's like how the song goes okay and we go it just sounds very percussive just because I'm a drummer doesn't mean everything I do is drum related I'm just having a hard time like getting a feel for it John I'm going to need you to bring it in for a tight roll I don't know how to do that okay Carrie and then your part is that's what you want me to do in the guitar and the vibe of the bridge is like have you guys seen stomp how's your day going you know pretty good almost the weekend yeah be making s'mores what did you say s'mores did you just ask me if I'm making s'mores no just because it's like chocolate and gram crackers no I get I get the composition of the s'more I just do I look 10 years old to you no I don't think you look 10 years old I have five kids each one better than the last I mean I like s'mores adult eat s'mores too if I were 10 years old would I be getting wine yeah I am going to need to see ID for that I left it at home okay justce mores makings I'm going to turn you kids into frogs and then I'm going to eat the frogs no do that that stinks you kid summon me we're saved thank God you're here you help us defeat terar the terrible that's me hey you've been giving the good people at this Village a hard time for too long you are so dead stand back kids I'm going to need you to pick a card you want me to pick a card yeah okay okay do you remember it yeah now just put it right back on top is this your card I mean yeah it's the one I put on top of the deck you didn't shuffle them sort of more thought you were going to like do a spell totally um so the thing is I'm not actually a wizard I'm a magician so what's the difference magicians are more like birthdays and carnivals and like pulling coins out of ears and then Wizards do hexes and spells and stuff gotcha also magicians can't prescribe medicine that was a joke oh so can you defeat Terry the terrible absolutely not oh no way honestly I think you'd be better off going to a specialist I can give you the contact of a buddy of mine who's really great um does anyone have a pen yeah I have a pen here you go um his name is Jameson Hurst oh don't go to Jameson why not I love Jameson no his prices are okay well who would you say I like Harold Michaels he's good Harold's also great yeah you know what I'll give you I'll give you both of their numbers you can compare prices give them Sasha too oh that's a good point I'm just really excited for you guys to meet hope we're not um waiting forever oh oh speak of the devil these are my parents hey how's it going it's great to meet you S Mrs Wilson it is so nice to meet you babe why do you have a huge ice cream cone oh this I meant to finish this before I got here sir I here you played tennis in college yeah I did um it's like a full ice cream cone kind of looks like you just got it did you go to the place like right next door yeah I was just right there well not to put to find a point on it but you're also a little late I got off work late I I think she's more saying that it's sort of weird that you stopped for ice cream when you were already running late just going to are you trying to put it down was you understand you can't can't do that Bottom's a point con you know what why don't I just throw it away this is not worth it no you showed up here with a huge ice cream cone serious the least you could do is eat it no I couldn't agree more babe you don't have to eat it babe it's fine I love ice cream okay let's just move has this I'll be eating this over here I can't talk but I can listen um Mom how's the painting going it's been going really well ow my tooth hit the cold in a weird way it's more about you know the activity than the finished product oh sorry brain freeze continue babe it's dripping all over the table don't micromanage me babe you're always micromanaging me you don't even know toat ice cream call it a night I don't know just because I'm eating the most delicious rum raisin ice cream cone RIS e rum raisin was kind of weird I don't okay I'm going to need to know where you each were the night of the murder night swimming at the lake me and green cam we were there too yeah it was the three of us me scarlet mustard guys what the hell um Professor were you at the lake as well you know what no I wasn't which is funny because I'm pretty sure I was just talking the other day about how much I love swimming it wasn't like a planned thing oh wasn't like a plan thing Professor I still need your account of the night yeah during the hour directly before and after the murder I was just home all by myself we can go swimming again it's not a big deal okay but do you see how the fact that I now don't have an alibi makes me feel worse about not being invited to the swimming do you have a keto his room yeah I have the only one and I have a motive because me and Grandpa got into like a big fight earlier in the day you did Grandpa said he was writing me out of his will and I said not if I write you out of this life old man and then I went to the bank and I withdrew all of my savings wao kind of sounds like you did it I did but that's not the point Miss hen you said you were attending a party on the night of the 31st yes how could that be true there's no 31st day of October um yes there is no there isn't there is are you sure um it's Halloween my client has never heard of Halloween you want to commit to that no I don't what else do you have um just let me take your time here we go the defendant was wearing a mask that obscured her entire face why would someone with nothing to hide Halloween was a Halloween costume yeah um I wrote most of these before I learned that do you want to take a recess like blood on the walls probably a decoration yeah ask me about possible motive hey don't patronize me just trying to help I actually eat my Oreos with peanut butter me too I love to eat them on my birthday December 11 11th we're literally finishing each other's twins this is so scary chills wait we can't be twins your hair isn't a ponytail that's true if we're not twins but we look exactly the same and have the same birthday then that means you're me from the future now I need to kill you before you kill me if I me from the future though why would I be British maybe at some point I go on like a 2mon trip to England and I come back and I have an accent and everyone's like really I didn't think I would do that I might though I ask a question before you kill me for sure well that photograph this no just a scrap of paper I've had as long as I can remember I have one too what do you think it means I don't know and now once a month under the light of the full moon he'll become a creature you don't recognize cool will it happen Okay will it happen every month or only when I'm under the light of it no if you're inside it won't happen you're fine if you're inside oh cool yeah okay what if it's what if I outside but it's really cloudy yeah also over when it's overcast you're you're set oh so around here good thing we live in Cleveland I know right yeah Lake Effect it's like one one every four Cycles at most you have to worry about it could I go outside if I'm like covered like if I'm wearing a mask or yeah a hat just wear a hat okay this all sounds pretty chill it's honestly not that big of an inconvenience yeah it sounds so fun yeah like it doesn't affect my life that much okay also I would think that like I don't know it's nighttime right so right so you you'll usually be inside anyway cool okay well thank you for all of this yeah no problem so if you saw me in the middle of the forest would you be like what's this doing here yeah can I do a cartwheel you cannot you need to ask broader questions am I one of those vegetables that technically is a fruit ask if you can be eaten can I be eaten no there's a guy who ate one of you like over the course of a lifetime no that's not going to be helpful is in rle believe it or not oh am I like a dude's own arm no but that's a fantastic guess it's not a fantastic guess am I like a big bowl of snails okay let's just say you can't be eaten not with that attitude am I an airplane not even close what do you mean not even close cars can't fly oh am I like one of those big meatballs okay I how sometimes at a fancy restaurant they'll only give you one meatball but it's really big kind of but imagine it's moving very fast oh in my car hi um we would like one of those tables with the big grills in the middle okay um what's the reservation name under we didn't know we needed those I'm sorry yeah you do John Hein you're going to meet us at the restaurant if the John hein's coming here a table is definitely in order one of those big ones with the grills in the middle I don't know who John Hein is what only starting center for the home tee best there is aren't you on the phone mhm was that John you want one of those tables with the big grills in the middle we don't have tables like that can you check in the back you want me to check to see if we've installed tables with grills in the middle the lady saying there's no tables with grills a man guess we could do a regular table okay we'll take a regular table no Grill okay we're out of regular table oh that does that doesn't mean hey we got the grill that's great news one of those onion volcano you're my best friend love you buddy we St dis using friendship walk much what did you say you heard me I know how to walk okay congrats I walk all the time what how do you think I got here I wasn't actually saying that I think you don't know how to walk if I didn't know how to walk would I have this picture of me on a hike with my cousins did you just have that picture in your pocket we went to aadia National Park and it was miraculous okay I can even do the more complicated variations of walking such as skipping and Galloping I like to see you skip I'm not afraid to yeah that's good this isn't even hard for me I'm going to be heading out next time you're about to say something snide ask yourself is this a fight I really want hey I'm Genie congrats oh my God I didn't summon a genie it's more of like a 99th callar situation I mean yeah I'll definitely take three wishes awesome I guess I wish for a million wishes huh is that not allowed no you can't that's just very clever really cuz I would think that'd be a pretty standard first wish man yeah okay wish two guess I love like a cool jacket yeah for sure oh thank you you hate it no no I don't yeah it's beautiful I just don't know if it's very me a rule of thums that if you ask for anything like Desy I have to design it like I can make anything got it in like a technical sense you know fashionist subjective okay I have another wish I would like to go back in time like a minute to before I seem to really hurt your feelings yeah I think that'd be good Hi how are you hi I'm good how are you I'm pretty good how can I help you oh I don't need anything did you call me by mistake I thought you came over here the um the button the one with the tiny man on it yeah that one I thought that was the restroom sign you don't have to ask to the bathrooms are that way yeah it was a misunderstanding I thought that if you push the tiny man in your seat became a restroom you could just go right where you were did you pee right where you are what no no no no really hey everything okay that lady is attacking me no I'm not why does it smell like Peach I want something sort of light not too like sweet not too dense okay and I like the idea of sort of like a raspberry filling so it sounds like the dress you're describing is actually a cake as I'm listening to Sasha it sounds like the dress just describing is actually a cake I'm definitely open to trying a cake it's not what I Envision but they're the experts and then for the outside maybe like a buttercream yeah see that's a cake wow I guess it is listen I've been doing this for 30 years I thought I wanted a strapless mermaid with beating and lots of applic cases but it turned out that what I was describing was a cake Jane do you have any fours um no I don't go fish really yeah um you'd think I would well cuz I have most of the other cards and I don't have any fours and samily has three cards yeah it's crazy I don't think yeah I don't think it adds up listen I swear on the grave of my great grandmother Nina I don't okay whatever I'll go Jane do you need sixes on the grave of my late great-grandmother Nina I do not have any sixes Sam do you have an eight um I do have one yeah guys I want to come clean about something what I have all the fours and some sixes I feel kind of guilty about selling at my great-grandmother I would think you would be yeah um well thanks for telling us at least I could do okay any Queens no pillows and pillows and black blets both play an important role in any good night's sleep but which do people generally prefer I decided to take matters into my own hands and took a poll of seven people walking past my bench in the park four people said blankets two people said pillows one passed by said Jane I said who's asking they lifted their large son had up and I realized Bob I said it's been 5 years you never called B said well I've got in the way it has a funny habit of doing that hey do you want to get dinner sometime I said I'd like that well in the Cozy Department looks like blankets are the winners next word is banana can you use it in a sentence really yeah uh okay the fruit salad had oranges Apples and Bananas in it okay permission to turn my microphone off yeah sure okay this [ __ ] is been bananas b a m a n m n I'm sorry that that's incorrect how could you hear me it's just this isn't that big of a room okay well I wasn't I wasn't spelling I was just singing b a m a n really thought that would work the next time you say letters it's going to count so just keep that in mind okay banana b a n a n a n no I just think it's been a long time coming I get it I get it and some communication issues are you even listening I am I am it's just you can't you can't kill a wave it's like even now I feel like we're having very different conversations coming what it's coming around I'm going to have to I would really appreciate it if you didn't you're just for the job yeah well they don't give these guys out to just anyone hey do you mind if I asked sort of a weird question no ask go away is that a filter what it's just it's like puncturing your neck in a weird way I don't know I just it's real I was using it right before this brought this guy up to my ear hello that's not the ear part these around do you know what it does for the blood it sendes the blood it counts the blood okay do you know what it's called mhm what's it called s scope and and can you put it on I don't have to prove myself to you well it's a job interview so you you do what is everyone's least favorite feeling when you're in bed and your big toenail is like a little chipped so it's scraping against the sheets so you like have to pull yourself out of bed have to sleep and like stumble through the dark to find a Clipper and then you get to the bathroom and you open the door and your partner's in there having appears to be a hush conversation with your dog and you say are you guys having a meeting as a joke um but then your partner says no why would you say that you're like that's a weird response and then your your dog um like was he talking a second ago your dog barks but it's not his usual bark it's like a human shouting the word bark and you say did the dog just say the word bark and then the dog does the second bark but this time it's a real bark so you don't know what to think and then your partner says maybe you should just forget that you saw this haha and go back to bed and over the coming days you try to forget it but you can't and it worsens over time you start to catch the dog looking at you hey babe are you talking to someone in there no I'm not I'm not talking to anyone how's everything over here um actually there's a hair in this mhm so you have something to remember me by uh I would love a side of mayonnaise for the fries for sure wait so I'm sorry um could I get a clean plate of food oh that's what I get for putting it on the line honey don't be cruel it was a gesture what was a gesture I know it's not a diamond necklace but she's giving you a lock of her hair so you'll have something of me it's not really a lock of hair it's like a it's like a piece of hair if you want to explore things with this woman Kate I don't want to explore things with this woman I'd want to explore if I found a lock of hair in my food look closely in your plate there's one in mine as well I noticed you the moment you walked in and I know my date will understand mine seeing where this goes no I won't excuse me there's a hair in my food thought you'd never notice Table Three an awful lot of people are seeing need to have locks of hair in their food it's not really a lock it's more like a piece of hair waiter what's going on you have us all Wrapped Around Your Finger uh not me I'm not we do anything for you but please don't play games with us I think I owe you all the truth and the truth is I'm not in love with any of you it's just that this restaurant is [Music] disgusting there are no doubts about it this is the most important moment of my life life what is this the landscape looks beautiful up close oh hello it's tun cheese tomato it's good it's C all right I'm going to call you guys there what's the problem I didn't want tomato in it I wanted tuna warmed up a little cheese on the side hi there what does cheese on the side mean it means I wanted to eat a tuna sandwich and a slice of cheese after hello hi I'm not eating this you are being such a baby um who are you Catherine I'm Jen okay take it easy no what are you doing here um having lunch just take off the Tomato take them off it'll still have the juices on it okay scrape the bread I would love one more minute of your time why is this woman still talking to us maybe she wants some lunch I'm sorry we don't have any extra lunch how did you get here how did you get to the moon what do you mean how probably same as you flying it's not like that hard I found it really hard hey could you settle a debate if I offer make you a sandwich you told me what you wanted and I got it just a little wrong would you act like I had killed someone cat the problem is that I'm allergic to tomatoes okay that's actually [ __ ] I've seen you eat so many things with tomatoes in them I don't know I guess it sounds like an honest mistake well that's sweet you're a more understanding person than me hey are you guys with NASA nasza what's her last name never mind I like this girl she's like a funny little robot I'm just wearing gear I don't know how you guys aren't wearing gear pretty easy we don't buy every everything in our line of vision when we go to REI Jenny don't be a [ __ ] listen I get it they're very convincing they're like oh you need special Moon gloves and Astronaut ice creams to save you the trouble next time all you really need is closed toad shoes okay so what do you do this are you a like man on the street like interviewer person I'm an astronaut yeah but like what do you do for money up on the left is a laughing G known for its loud laugh likee call all have a question yes is the laughing G a type of whale no it's a bird then I don't care about it yeah we're here to see whale every time you show us a new animal that isn't a whale it becomes more clear that you don't respect us look I know everyone's wanting to see some whales we're going to try one more spot I don't care if you have to call in a favor okay get them here I'm not hiding them from you you're close with the whales you have a relationship with them what you stand on noes we've all seen the pictures are you talking about SeaWorld if this endless gray sky is what the SeaWorld is I'm sure happy not to be a fish I'm really starting to question my belief in whales well whales are real that's not up for debate actually doubt is really crize her you can all please just stop yelling at me I'm happy to hear any reasonable concerns yeah I have something reasonable to say okay if we don't see a whale soon we can easily overpower you and throw you into the ocean here here just give me I'm going to talk to you hey um it's happening again over you mean the threats over yeah they really want to see a will okay well you might have to do the trick I I I hate the trick okay I actually have a letter from a special friend who his name is splashy he's a humpback whale the letter is from a whale well don't just stand there read it dear explorers I want to let you know how sad I am that I can't be here with you today is this really from a whale I don't have to keep reading if this is boring to you no I mean I I guess you could keep reading good being a whale isn't easy I'm busy chasing down Krill and doing cool tricks what's next yeah keep reading I guess say hi to my old buddy Catherine for me and I hope the rest of the boat ride is a blast that was really cool yeah I got to hand it to you seems like splashy respects you a lot I'm sorry for threatening to drown you it's okay guys look what else okay you're doing great almost there yeah I think I'm going to make it but you know no matter what I'll be okay well you're going to make it no matter what and then you'll be okay yeah but if there's an emergency I always have the safety cord right but you don't need a safety cord okay safety cord or not you will make it safely to the side Janice is there a safety cord running from the back of my harness to the RO well the cord is actually running from one building to the other keeping you comfortably aoft are you just talking about the tight RPP yes Janice why am I not attacking to anything well we looked it up and the record for this hype tethered has already been reached I don't care about a record which is why we didn't waste your time by letting you know Janice I want to live I gleaned that from how well you're balancing why did you give me a harness if it's not tied to anything to create the illusion of safety so you could tackle this momentous challenge uninhibited by fear but you are telling me before I am all the way across yeah I probably shouldn't be I don't want to be on here I don't want to be on the Rope as your coach the safest place for you right now is balanced a top the Rope I know so high up 103 Stories the highest ever traversed without a Janice you are fired at least if I get across do you understand that I think when you get your write up in the online publication Walkers Gazette you'll change your mind this is my last minute of life no just watch out for that bird and you'll be fine what bird oh my God when that happens it's always CU of pigeons yeah okay are you ready to go ready as I'll ever be all right hop on mine will have a safety cord right don't worry about that you it feels like the first actual day of summer it really does Jean are you hot in that hoodie no okay I will bet three chips and I'll bet four chips are you sure Gina yeah in the perfect temperature now Sarah takes all the chips because she bted the most another win for me what if we turned on the AC what if you took your hoodie off I don't want to Gina clearly didn't put on a shirt under her hoodie this morning and now she can't take it off no that's not true Gina got a little lazy getting dressed and now she's going to be a little bit too hot all day I'm not hot I'm cold I'm freezing I was just offering to do something to make you guys less hot cuz I care about your comfort more than my own whatever you say Gina no don't use that tone with me Fran Don't Pity Me pity Sarah Sarah's cheating at chips me I'm not cheating then how do you keep winning because in chips whoever bets the highest number of chips wins that round and Sarah keeps betting the most that's just the rules of chips Gina something about the way she's playing feels impossible okay it's Sarah's move I'll bet five chips Gina I'll bet three Sarah wins how can we turn the AC on it's like 90° in here I guess 85 any final guesses before I check an even 80 22° Gina Gina I'm not allowed to be cold and disagree with you you're so cold that you think it's 22° I'm leaving I don't need this guys I don't know how to say this but it's exactly 22° what let me see that no is it possible that we're all cold and not hot so that's what the feeling was Jina was right about everything just mean that I was cheating at chips oh wait guys you know what there's a little CA next to the 22 so we are hot we're not cold oh good okay here's your order number it'll be ready at the window awesome thank you we also have a free delivery deal that goes until tomorrow oh cool would you like to opt in for the sandwich I just got you could get it delivered right to you for for free to me or to my address cuzz my my address is actually far from where I am right now we'll deliver it right to your location um I'm okay you think there's a catch but there isn't one no I'm not worried there's a catch I'm just you I'm here you're here but you could have gotten the same deal without leaving the comfort of your home I was in this area anyway well how about this it's a Friday I bet you gr with some friends later okay well I don't know what that has to do if you wanted to like late night snack un and your friends could get it delivered to you with no charge whatsoever I don't get why you're going to bat so hard for this and what if I told you this you wouldn't even have to tip the delivery person what don't even worry about tipping them if that'll change your mind I don't think you can hi is there a problem over here no not really Mary did you help enough customers to understand our exciting delivery deal yet I'm trying I'm trying you have to get to 10 orders or else we won't be able to pay our delivery truck driver do you want that no I don't I really don't how many people have you gotten so far two and a bunch of next times that's not enough three it's not nearly enough marshy three really yeah I mean I don't want anyone to starve so you do that you said it's going to be delivered to me right yes it's not going to be delivered to my house you're just going to hand it to me when it's ready of course then yeah sure and what's your address okay I'm going to tell you so it's counted but I I don't want my sandwich going there it's 34 ignatious drive you got that Stevie yep no is that mine no time to chat that is my order just hand the bag to Me Stevie we told our customer she didn't have to tip you for this one I'm confident I'll be paid if I'm fast enough I just hope we get to 10 until time I won't be able to tip you if you go to my house because I'm not at my house she can't hear you she's too far away and she's moving too fast I'm going to the park cool have fun do you want to come with me I'm doing other stuff work stuff no it's Leisure stuff it's perfect out there's no better Leisure than I don't want to go to the park you know what yes you do no I don't dogs running around bark parking frisbee sailing through the air little carts ringing their Bell ice cream fresh fruit I know what the park is well I'm sorry it just it seems like you don't because you know what self-respecting person would say not to all that well I guess I'm not a self-respecting person so have fun but I'm not coming with you I just can't understand why you aren't coming you want to go to the park and that's great because you are going to the park my point is I think everyone wants to go to the park and is there so I don't I know why you'd be the one exception I can guarantee you that there are a lot of people in this city who are on their computers just like me well that is a tragedy okay I'll pass that along to the rest can I ask you something what's your mood level right now I would describe it as low I think it's probably cuz you're inside it's because my roommate is being extremely judgmental are you ready you just give me like 5 minutes ready for what the beach you're going to the beach yeah I I am the beach is like the park but bigger where are you going um the park that's cute I was Str you you're brave and you were planning to go outside all along I wish you would stop talking to me like I'm a child well I'm going to run have fun at the park where there isn't even water to swim in or sand your other friend is terrible yeah she's got really good taste though what does that mean I don't know try Claire her password is not going to be your own first name Claire's computer also don't think that's going to oh hey guys hey Claire what's going on We're Just Fishing fishing what do you mean like data fishing on the pH for fish we're into your computer what yeah we're hacking in guys we think it's nuts that your password is Claire's computer it's supposed to be a password not a description CLA If This Were a label maker I say it's a great password um first of all my password is not Claire's computer okay that's a good try CA but we already entered it and it worked no I'm serious that's not my password it's not no then you know come to think of it this actually could be my computer is your password Claire's computer as I come to think of it yes I remembered I thought it would it be a secure password seeing as I'm not CLA why are you guys trying to break into my laptop just wanted to buy some things using your um credit card just so we wouldn't have to like pay for it that is unbelievably not okay no I feel like you get we just wanted to get some new stuff and we just wanted to use an account that our card wasn't attached to no I get it I'm not saying I don't get it how can we explain this to her in a way she'll understand hey stranger it's been a while listen pay I don't know what you're scheming but I know you'll never get away with it and you'll never make it off that bus alive tell her Linda okay my name is Linda I'm Payne's new assistant okay not tell her about yourself Oh you mean about the bum that's right what bomb Linda set up a fun little surprise for you if that speedometer hits 50 bomb will be activated and the bus will explode pay you never miss a trick so you'd better keep that thing moving and fast okay starting when it's already begun the bomb's active and the second it dips below 50 cuz I'm at a light right now you're currently stopped at a light mhm Linda sounds like she's following the rules for now but good luck to her if she gets on the freeway Linda did did you set it up so that the bomb goes off when it crosses to above 50 yeah okay she goes above 50 she can say goodbye to being alive below 50 Linda wait so I just can't let the bus go above 50 mph it seems that that is the situation that feels easy it does it might seem easy but make one mistake and everyone on that bus goes Kabam well it's just me on board at the moment it's just you on the bus yeah you said this was a popular line Linda no I said the people who take that line seem popular yeah no one really takes the six during the day I might just pull over yeah I guess there's nothing stopping you from doing that it's a nice typewriter thanks too bad it's not the 1950s listen Jamie are you going to buy anything no I'm just browsing during my break over at textop next door we just got a brand new batch of laptops good for you do you even know what a laptop is yes it's a little computer it makes me sad seeing how behind the times this store is it's just a different kind of store Jamie this stuff is completely outdated if my phone can tell me what time it is down to the second then why would I need to buy that enormous thing some people might think it's cool I don't I don't know and my phone just tells me the number it doesn't make me solve a puzzle first you don't know how to read a clock I know some of the times like how 6 and3 or when the hands go down but not all of them cuz I don't need to I have a customer hi uh no I was actually I I was just coming in here to see if anyone has the time there's a clock right behind me well all that thing tells me is that it's not 6:30 while you're in here would you like to hear our daily deals no thanks no offense but the stuff in here looks a bit old I'm not offended by that the store sells old things newer things would be more useful to me I'm always trying to tell her that I work next door at Tech Stop you work at Tech Stop why they have some of the newest items in the country newest in the country you know you could learn a thing or two from this lady like how to be a jerk I'm saying this because I hope it helps not to be mean Globes clocks couches most people use newer sorts of things what newer thing has replaced couches you've been living inside this history textbook so long you don't even know the hell is this I like audio books because the readers tell you exactly how you're supposed to feel about a character immediately like the way they'll introduce a character that we're not supposed to learn is like a bad person for 200 more pages they'll be like the character said I'm having a dinner later if you want to come by and it's like the tone is like she's fancy and we don't like her every book has a fancy woman who's very shallow to horrible gossip and um she lives next door I like and I like this about audio books cuz I can um when I'm listening to an audio book I'm I'm I'm using that time to think about my own stuff but I do miss important things and some sometimes like thinking like what if there were a feature that like was there a feature where you could kind of they could they could tell when you're not paying attention and they could pause it for you that's that would be evil that could that would be a horrible thing to you you have to catch yourself when your CU your brain's going to be inventing stuff in the background I was feeling grumpy about how I had all all this stuff to do and N of time and like my brain's going to be all tired by the time I get to see my friends and I really just I want to be like my best self for them I like what if there were a way to separate your work self your life and it's SE just so you know I'm a huge fan stop it no I'm serious you put curses on all my best friends babies did one that was so good recently when was it with like the singing and the one where she could sing beautifully but never speak yeah oh my God that's it hilarious well let's not waste any time okay put a lot of thought into this one your daughter will be beautiful and kind but every day at sundown oh boy she's going to turn to you and she's going to be like let's go watch the sun go down every day the sky's so pretty uh-huh and when you don't want to even if you have a really good reason she'll be like oh guess no one wants to live in the moment how we spend our days is how we spend our lives that's what she'll say to you every day so she'll just want to watch the sunset it'll be really annoying I mean I think sunsets are nice no everyone thinks sunsets are nice I think sunsets are nice that's not the point people do find the sunset thing annoying isn't that a curse on them and not on her but then but if people are annoyed by this thing she does all the time then that'll inhibit her yeah I guess but it doesn't matter cuz you hate it it's a little heady do you want me to just turn her into a Frogg at sun down kind of but I feel bad no it's fine one for me one for them hello hi there ma'am my name is Stacy and I would like to tell you about an exciting opportunity who is that tele marketer yeah how did you get my info um your phone number is 000000001 so maybe you can figure that one out well I would love to be taken off your list sure at the end today's consumer wants Whimsy and convenience a set of collapsible camping bowls a waterproof camera a chocolate fountain these are all things that I am interested in if you have them if I have those things yes I've been looking to acquire some cool new stuff kind of confused let me share with you a common challenge someone like me might face I wake up and I don't have any cool gadgets that make me go wow that's neat can you relate to this no that was about you situation B and let me know if you can relate all my friends can put their cameras in the swimming pool except for me so you're just asking if you can buy something of mine yes ma'am just anything that you think I would like going off the information you have from this conversation yeah sorry I don't think so you're not being a very good salesperson I'm not a hang on I'm getting another call hello good afternoon ma'am my name is Noah and I would like to tell you about the opportunity of a lifetime hi um how did you get this number the question is how did you get this number did you invent phones I would love to be taken off your list can you do that sure later have you ever taken a stunning photograph and then realize you're in the shower and now your camera's broken no but I do have someone who might be able to help you one second hell hello hi ma'am um I just added someone to the call who I think has a waterproof camera oh that's amazing oh no I don't have a waterproof camera I was just looking to buy one wait no is that you it's Stacy oh my God Stacy I think the lady's still on the phone how's my cicle I want to show you a picture of my cat's fighting visuals were really amazing to me yeah well um I think they were amazing for everyone what's that tone there's no tone is this about my 3D experience goggles I knew you were going I do this it wasn't a 3D movie bringing glasses from home does not make a movie 3D all the online reviews agree that these work real 3D movies don't even use the red boot glasses like that anymore I don't know where you found those you're being so mean right now I'm not I'm sorry I can you stop being mean to me about my glasses so we can discuss the actual movie cuz I would love to discuss the actual movie I would love to discuss the movie great I really liked um the second half yeah I definitely found the first half slow the only way that I can describe it is that it felt underwater oh is it interesting when everything's blue it's like there are other colors what do you mean by first half left to right do you think that maybe U oh my God it wasn't because of these the left half of the screen didn't look blue to me that's all that's all I was saying you just said you would stop doing this I know I I just thought the glasses might be relevant here like you just told me that we would stop making everything about your issues with my glasses and now you're right I'm sorry thank you God I have such a bad headache is daylight savings this weekend yeah yeah wow I I completely missed it it's wild how that can happen now cuz all of your devices update on their own I always feel like the extra hour is not worth it they getting dark at 5 that and the lawlessness I'm going to stay in next year this year wipes me out I never even go out but it's just a hassle remembering to like lock everything and traffic and what are you guys talking about daylight savings the extra hour when all laws disappear you can't be prosecuted for anything you do during daylight savings I don't think that's true no literally like sometimes I cannot believe it's true no like I'm saying I think it's not true like I think that's the movie The Purge what the purge it's a movie where all laws disappear for a little while that's what you're thinking of no Purge is when you have two long thin pieces of metal on your shoes and you slide down a Snowy Mountain no that's skiing so you're saying daylight savings is based on this Purge movie no I'm saying daylight savings does not have a purge element I don't want to be a smartass but do you mind if I Google it not at all I could totally be wrong I mean selfishly I'm hoping we're right on this cuz I did some just say unspeakable things this weekend if we're wrong you're in trouble what kinds of things see what Google says before we freak out which of the laws did you um I mean I definitely did like the big one killing okay so Google is saying that they like State sanctioned Anarchy for a period That's the movie The Purge but I think if you explain the misunderstanding you killed someone I got the rules mixed up we're going to figure this out okay it's a mistake anyone could have made they actually latch onto the kelp while they sleep so they don't drift out to sea oh that's interesting unfortunately that's all the time we have if you likes the tour I hope you did my name is Jess you can leave a comment card and if you didn't my name is Kayla all right thanks everyone great tour thank you shall we yeah hang on you too us what's my name I'm sorry what if you liked the tour my name is Jess if you didn't It's Kayla so I'm just curious as to what my name is oh we like we like the tour so then what would that make my name Jess and you what's my name your name is Jess is it because I saw a look exchange and I'm wondering if I'm walking around thinking my name is Jess when it's Kayla like a joke sorry if I made a face I really didn't I didn't mean anything by it don't lie to me she we're not okay no one's leaving until these two tell me exactly what they're going to tell each other when I'm out of your shot really yep I mean we might talk about how you're doing this yeah this part is about the tour what did you really think of the tour I can handle it I'm not a child I guess I wish You' touched on Mount Rushmore a little yeah I think that might have been what the look you saw was what you just didn't really mention it it was all stuff about animals I was a tour guide at the San Diego Zoo for over 30 years do you know how overqualified I am for this job we Sorry to supposed to inspire you want a laundry list of facts about the Beatles you can go to Mount Rushmore website Beatles you know how many thousands of people have assured me my name isn't Kayla hi I got a call saying the cake I ordered is ready sure yeah what was the order it says happy birthday Oliver should be under Janie oh that cake is actually already been picked up it has Yeah by that woman at the table over there that woman didn't um it was my cake huh yeah I don't know that's that's weird hey ma'am hi there I think you're eating my cake me I don't think so have a nice day is it definitely her it was definitely happy birthday Oliver cake yeah this happened 2 minutes ago she came in and the cake was on the counter and she saw it and she was like I'm Oliver and I said do you mean Joanie and she said what and I said the order is under Joanie and she said yeah sure whatever you gave it to her after that something about the way she said it made me feel like I had to ma'am I'm certain you're eating my cake no this cake I'm eating is actually my cake sorry for the confusion I don't really know what to do here can you talk to her I don't know she's so confident now I'm kind of doubting it's not hers you have a beautiful shop thanks um would you like some coffee in the house what hey you can't just steal people's cakes I'd love to chat more but I'm in a meeting she's not in a meeting well she's doesn't look like she's in a meeting but she's never given me any reason not to trust her she's eating a cake she just stole from you to stay would you mind bringing me a glass of ice cold milk absolutely coming right up are you lost um yeah I'm new here I can tell but don't worry you'll get the hang of things yeah I hope so where are you headed um I'm trying to find the hton library well that's just that way about 200 ft just walk into until you see the garils can't miss it thank you any time then what do I do after that well then you're there like it's it's just down there I me like like I'll go to the library and like that's a few hours but like what do I do after oh um you go to the park the Park's right nearby and that's fun sure sure but I meant more like what do I do like like always always like what should I do like like all of the time like what should I do generally you mean like how should you live your life yeah I don't know if I can I don't know you well what did what would you do if you were me well what do you like U I like music I like pasta I like eating pasta okay so maybe you could take a cooking class or go see some live music or something like that yeah but these are still like these are still like activities I I think I'm asking like like what kind of person am I I don't think I can give you the answers that you're looking for why not I just can't I'm a stranger it could be anything you could literally be like Army okay I'm not going to tell you to join the Army well just thanks for directions at least yeah for sure good luck out there thank you who's that person you were talking to someone lost it bums me out seeing someone looking at a map yeah oh my God I should have told her about our cult wow such a space CET in the mornings and this one's going to be in the same schedule as the two little ones great and are all of these non-toxic I would actually have to double check that but yeah all of this sounds very doable oh T's back hi this is Tony hi ton uh this is Jen that potential plant sitter hi Jen the Jen who responded to our Craigs us Dad yep that's me um I thought we had decided that will you relax you have some really beautiful plants yeah they're looking happy these days H can I talk to you for a minute in the kitchen can it be after this it's about this either of you have any misgivings about me I'm happy to answer any questions you have why here you hear that Tony why don't you talk to our guest instead of being weird and rude okay um yeah so we called your reference and she had some feedback okay great I love constructive criticism she said that you ate all of her plants okay she said she came back from her trip and found that you had eaten all of her plants I think Tony and honestly I would love some just maybe some reassurance and just like what the story is there yeah um at my last house sitting job I did eat all the plants yeah okay they left for a month um and I had eaten every last one by day two see she did have an explanation why would you include someone whose plants you ate as a reference I thought they might speak to some of my other qualities Jen what would you say to a potential employer who was maybe worried about that happening again ell you're asking all the right questions thank you did I eat each and every plant the only other time I house set yeah and I can't promise you I won't eat yours in fact I'm already eating all of your plants in my head but I'm really good at this job I'm smart and I work hard how are you good at this job if you eat the plants I make up for it in other ways I make really good pies and I leave fun scavenger hunts I think she's changed she hasn't said that she literally hasn't said that won't eat our plants how would you guys feel about getting a couple extra basil plants before my start date she's asking you to get more plants for her to eat speak for both Tony and myself when I say that you're hired he miss Perry um you read of my test you wanted to talk to me Chloe you're such a great student which is why it makes me sad to see some of the choices you've been making lately well I got an A minus so no it's not that um Chloe who you surround yourself with is very important I've noticed you've begun spending a lot of time with Lena and those other older kids oh yeah I just think they're fun just hope you'll try not to lose yourself in the high school of it all just there can be a pressure to conform okay I know it sounds TR no no it doesn't um I appreciate it Miss P thank you I'm glad is that a new shirt Lena picked it out for me is it all I'll say is I can tell Lena picked it out for you okay noted and the hat too I just you don't need to reinvent yourself you don't need to prove anything you're great the way you are I kind of likeed that but I see what you're I see what you're saying it's too small for the size of your head plus a lighter color would be more flattering and don't feel like you have to wear pants like that just cuz Lena or some microt Trend says so you'll look back at photos and think what was I doing I look like an idiot yeah um these are mine they're pretty old that ring don't base your choices around some invisible barometer of coolness the barometer isn't feeling super invisible in this talk you should stick to simple Timeless pieces that fit you really well and that necklace too again some of this just feels like you thinking I look bad I only want to encourage you to be your most authentic self that's kind of you uh it is I'm telling you these things because I think you have such a bright future you're a great kid seriously thanks and Chloe yeah don't bleach your eyebrows it's not a flattering look if you're a little bit ugly okay get out of here you got 5 minutes to catch the bus did you just call me ugly I'm really glad we had this conversation okay does somebody want to kick off our discussion I'll start I guess um just those last two chapters would be a good place Professor shouldn't the discussion maybe start at the beginning of the book and not the end that's kind of a good idea Diana let's maybe um start with some Basics before we dive into things story about a girl and the tone is very light and upbeat is jarring knowing it's ultimately going to be about a murder again with the spoilers Professor Diana Ruth was talking she was going to say the ending I had to cut her off well this is a discussion course and the whole book was assigned I know that I would hope they aren't spoilers for anyone in this room well I was just looking up for the group Ruth do you want to continue your thought yeah um I guess there's a lot of like focus on the tension between marjorie's desires and then her family's Professor Diana I'm sorry I can't keep this lie up the person It spoilers to is me I read a lot of the book and honestly I'm loving it so far sister character reminds me a lot of myself but I didn't quite finish it okay then just listen and participate where you can just going back to the like tensions between and I don't want it to seem like I don't care about this class I care about it a lot all that I ask is that we focus our discussion today not on the ending you didn't finish the book we're not going to going to not talk about the whole book I read so much and I type 80 words a minute I don't think the one time I don't quite finish a book everyone should treat me like a monster it's okay that you didn't finish and it happens but you need to not take away from the students who did Professor there are two options obviously we could dismiss Ruth or we could be adults and just limit our conversation to these first 18 Pages you only read 18 Pages my copy 18 pages is most of the book it has really small font [ __ ] hey Diana do you want to be here we're going to talk about the entire thing so just make a decision my decision is I would like to change my major to Art Studio Art not art history okay I'm not in charge of that also my friend just texted me saying my favorite kind of Hawk is in the park so I'm going to leave right now if you guys want to be mad at me for that you can hey hi how's Lynch good um everyone asked about you what are you doing I'm drawing like a picture yeah is there something wrong with that no um what are you drawing nothing it's not important is it a secret I was drawing a helicopter okay okay how did you find yourself doing this this is why I didn't want to get into it just cuz usually I work at this time and I've never expressed an interest in art okay so because I've never expressed an interest before means I'm not allowed to draw no you know that's not what I meant it was a stupid idea anyway I think it's great I'm excited to see you exploring your creative side it's not some big self-discovery thing okay I just wanted to draw a helicopter can I see it now you're being mean I'm not I just want to see it that's great no it's not I'm sorry I stressed you out what else have you been up to just this I don't know how many of the things to give it hey it's not the usual sound just means it's empty empty your pass is out of money do you have another method payment one two three um can you hold this four all right how much money is six how much money is 6 qu yeah I'm not a math person you don't have to be rude about it it's $150 okay I'm going to check in my back pockets no just go ahead like ride the bus for 150 when the cost is $ 2250 yeah just sit down I have two pockets I haven't even check I like I want to pay I don't care you didn't have the money ready when I got here so just sit down if I want to pay and you don't want me to pay then you're stealing from the city not me okay then get off the bus wait don't please let me on I was kidding I've been waiting for the bus for 20 minutes I have was schedule to keep so just make a choice I'm no more counting money up here okay I'm going to take the ride but I'm going to find a way to earn the difference that's not necessary just sit down when you take a fork and do cross-hatching that's called scoring if you take the goop from the water cup and put it on the cross tach area makes a handle stronger what are you saying why are you talking I'm driving I'm a pottery teacher this is the only paid service I'm qualified to offer in order to ear my ride I'm not asking you to earn your ride what if this is a test and I'm like the best version of like when they send someone undercover to see if a Bar's serving people underage you would fail that would show me good morning Kathy I'm sorry I have to take this put some R clay aside for me and then feel free to get started okay you soon she makes the ugliest Bulls in town you would not believe how ugly they are did you just request to stop yeah this is me we've gone a block and a half okay sorry my destination isn't further you waited 20 minutes to go block and a half yeah I did and it was nice to meet you too hey Dave you're right bu 37b is letting people on for $150 Kyla just texted that she's going to be here in a minute oh would today be a good time to talk to her about um yeah maybe you guys talking to Kyla about her lyrics yeah good that is long overdue hey guys speak of the devil sorry I'm late I kind of lost check a time working on this new song what's going on why are you guys being weird do you want to do it no I think you should say it um Kyla we've been thinking it might be good to have like a check-in conversation about our band's messaging okay what's our band's messaging I guess like lyric wise we always want to be dynamic and provocative okay why are you talking like that oh my God Mac Kyla all your songs are birthday songs mine yeah no they're not your two biggest songs are birthday Superstar and balloons balloons balloons that's two and they're completely different song you also did someone's turning 26 one's like in the glove of the Ki candle people draw from the same Wells more than once I mean Stella's written like 50 songs about that 2 x Is AO X she's not over hey Kyla love is a much broader and richer topic than birthday do you understand that I disagree but you know what you guys are about to eat your words cuz I have this great new song it's called today's all about you today is all about you it sounds kind of sounds name of a birthday song it's not actually it's about losing a loved one so I bet you guys feel like jerks can we see it of course what was that what did you do relax it's just a bridge from an earlier draft I want to see it hey it's from an earlier draft don't read it aloud goes birthday birthday birthday it's your birthday but wait listen to it in the cont T it's going to make sense yeah play as the song You Alive is all I want for my birthday you got quieter but we can still hear that that day in July was both of our birthday birthday no you don't have to lie just like mix things up going forward is over I'm going solo what can I get for you could I please get uh letter j or if that's too difficult uh heart oh slow down um meter veggie oh sorry um meat Burger in the shape of a j okay I'm not really doing fun shapes the burgers are all just normal round oh yeah I shaped the patties into earlier today so they're ready to go gosh so meat no I think I think I'm actually going to pass are you going to pass on the burger all together I'm not that hungry for round okay hey FR hey Lena what would you like uh W please where is this coming from just cuz L's kind of a boring letter no the shapes the only shape we have is normal round ah really normal is my least favorite kind can I offer you a veggie patty or a meat Patty I think I'm going to take a lap maybe just have some chips I just the round ones taste the same it's the same stuff yeah but you know it's like how angel hair is the same stuff as rotoni and hey it's nothing like that again I'm sure they're delicious hey and's being like really uptight about these Burgers I know she's so particular like this is supposed to be like a chill party hey Fran how's it going not Good Sam no one will eat my Burgers just cuz they're not fun shapes what well everyone would love one of your Burgers you would yep thank you although and I don't I don't want to add to your fun shaped headache but is there any chance you could cut it in half just so it's easier to split oh that I can do that's very different from these guys are asking for like twoo perspective awesome thanks and maybe if you can just like cutting a little semicircle out of each of the halves like I tow in the hole Yeah and then just orienting them on the bun so it's like a right facing arc on top of a left facing Arc you're trying to trick me into making an S for Sam guys it didn't work she figured it out was a good idea though you still want your burger halfes I'm probably just going to like take a lap and get some chips okay it looks like your bag is just one pound over the limit do you want to try um moving some stuff into your carry-on like right now yeah just so I don't have to charge you the oversized fee what if there's just one thing in there that can't be taken apart like a like a tuba or like a mediumsized dog well I hope it isn't an animal but yeah we don't have to I can if you're okay with the charge cool okay over SI back it's not a dog that was just an example okay good but if it was a dog it it wouldn't be bad if it was one that really liked it in the suitcase for for what it's worth pardon if it's a dog where every time it's at home and like gets anxious and and I'm like what do you want to go outside you want your bone it's like no what it wants is to get in the bag and he even learned how to zip himself up from the inside it's like it was that kind of dog is what I'm saying it's pretty dangerous for a dog to be in a suitcase like this oh we can agree to disagree on that it was just hypothetical check bags go to a section of the plane without pressurized air so that plus the suitcase what yeah it's also cold in there it's are you Ser what is wrong with you guys there's dogs in these no that's my point there aren't okay I'm just going to accept the oversized bag fee but I want you to know that I'm going to be pretty angry if I find out that you guys didn't put the full amount of oxygen in the checked bag section ma'am please do not leave your dog here with me in this bag my dog is not in there it's the principal suitcase just barked that's my ringtone okay I don't believe you well I guess you'll never know for sure cuz you guys can only x-ray the little ones we look inside these bags too we look inside all the bags really yes okay I have to go make some calls this was horrible customer service I can help who's next hi I'd like to check this is there a dog in here too no just my friend Becca hi I'm Becca but don't worry she loves it in the bag we do it all the time you can't check your friend Becca how I living in here I try that ma'am if dogs are allowed in these then I don't see why Becca can't be dogs aren't allowed in these this is horrible customer service this Warehouse is so like edgy I know have you ever done this before no never yeah we NE here can tell me the first rule of Fight Club don't fall in I don't know green shirt don't fall in love no was a good guess though um love wins no that's also wrong what the hell it's really not cool man no I support I that's just not the rule I'm thinking of so love is neither allowed nor not allowed okay does anyone else have guesses be safe we probably won't be safe all the time yeah as crazy as things get down here violence is never the answer also going to guess violence is never the answer I think that's probably it this is a club that was created specifically for violence do you all understand that someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed wait guys I actually think I might know it what Cal's telling me about this the first rule of Fight Club is don't talk about Fight Club oh that's neat I like that K was telling you about this no I just if you want to have a good club you're going to have to tell people about it like when it meets and stuff Fight Club oper at outside of societal and legal Norms it has to be a secret what if we just worked out like a gym club that way it wouldn't have to be a secret and we could like promote our meetings online cuz if I like really honest with myself I love the exercise part of this love the social part what I don't love is the beating each other up part someone said it but we have to fight cuz the fighting Is What Makes Us Alive as men it just sounds like maybe like you have some stuff that you need to work out how about this we go to Denny's get a big mess of Pancakes and write up some Community guidelines as a team that's an amazing idea yes absolutely read my mind there no guys don't go I'm Sorry Brad if you want to join us we would love to have you really there's 100% a seat with your name on it we just want to be included in the discussion I guess I do like pancakes come on okay there's that smile Fight Club could I please get the burger but could I get it with Swiss instead of cheddar yeah and for you I'll do the soup to start hey how'd you do that what you order something that has stuff is different from what the menus that I had on it you can do that you can ask for substitutions usually so if I didn't like pickles I get something like I do like instead like switch it out for whatever I want I mean like within reason thank you mhm and for you miss um could I please get the veggie burger but hey could I please um swap out the pickles for double cheese absolutely anything else for you yes could I please get a Sprite but sub the Sprite out for Coke just Coke she means Coke cool do you want to cap it there maybe not make things too complicated for let me do this I need to concentrate okay okay Laura going back to the Burger I would like to take the tomatoes that come on it toss those right out of the equation and then replace them with can you do like a sauteed mushroom or an onion Jam I can do grilled onions how's that that'd be wonderful all right I feel like I've been asleep my whole life you have whatever you want it's like magic you need to keep it together hey Laur I noticed the burger comes on a sesame seed bun it does yeah could I instead do something like a Brios or a Sourdough yeah we can do sour dough or better yet can I scrap those and have the the veggie burger Ser be served between two chickens two whole chickens she's kidding do I look like I'm kidding je easy I don't think we can do that and call it one dish I'm sorry no you don't apologize Laura you are perfect I could do your burger with no bun and then also bring you an order of our half chicken thank you then it wouldn't be a substitution flew too close to the Sun yeah's scrap it scrap the whole thing regular veggie burger as is okay and Sprite then yeah just regular Sprite not Sprite with Coke swapped in for the Sprite okay I'll be right back with the drinks thank you Michelle you've been acting super weird tonight is everything okay Carrie Wanda hi it's been since high school I think so how are you doing good great my husband and I actually just bought that house right there so we're meeting with a landscaper today wow and what about you what are you up to I'm housesitting for I guess your future neighbors the mcallisters ah okay okay what do they like they're so easy to steal kitchen stuff from oh oh you meant like as neighbors yeah they're super chill I'd imagine they're very easy to steal packages from well listen I should probably run but if you ever need anything we're right there thank you that's very kind let me know actually there is one thing do you guys have any good snacks cuz the mcallisters are always telling me I'm welcome to have anything in the fridge but the only thing in there is like meal kits we're not actually moved in yet gotcha all right you know what would be great then mhm you guys could get one of those like big tins of popcorn and send it to the mcalisters as like a neighborly introduction and get good neighbor points and then that'll make it wayway back to me yeah um I guess I can try to send something over once we're settled car you see I'm a little agitated I'm not I just I have a lot to get done today so a lot on my mind I think I might know what are you embarrassed to run into someone from high school who's doing so well when you're a little all over the place that's not it no good you shouldn't be we're all on our own Journeys we all move at different speeds thank you I want to give you something to help you with the move is this the mcallisters okay yeah it's engraved I can't take this suit yourself it was nice seeing you though yeah you too and let me know if you guys ever need a house sitter she's a mess hey um can I buy you a drink sure yeah thank you um can I please get a logger for myself and then a peach Southpaw oh sounds fancy sorry one more time um a peach Southpaw and extra condensed milk please thanks so where are you from I'm from here no way yeah I love it here kind of has everything I have no idea what that drink is oh um it just the standard you know juice from a can of peaches condensed milk rum clove I don't think we have all that stuff say just a beer would be great cuz you just check yeah Claire can you check in the B and see if we have condensed milk no no condensed milk yes I have this book of cocktails that any bartender should know how to make and it's in there oh well I'd never heard of it if you go to PE it's right there peach Southpaw I believe you what year was the book published oh you're listening I don't know because the first 10 pages have been lost at time I actually did find a can oh look at that has a dents in it though why don't I just get a beer too a come on come on you know what no yeah I'm making this drink the thing is I don't want a drink with condensed milk in it I can really understand why you wouldn't but um this thing is in motion maybe I can have the logger and you can have the peach milk thing a peach Southpaw yeah okay I don't really like them which one do you think they're so different oh I'm sorry this just those look exactly the same to me I'm still learning about this stuff go with that one all right and for the evening look we're between these Andrea what on Earth is so funny I I just can't help it I just I'm just like you know it's two belts they both hold up pants you know these two aren't even remotely similar no to a trained eye I'm sure I just yeah ignore me show me the spring collection yes um these are my top two for the first look wow Andrea oh come on they're identical these oh you think the fashion industry has nothing to do with you Miranda wait but that lumpy sweater you're wearing was picked for you by the people in this room Miranda just Andrea what color are these belts I don't know sort of a brownie beige color and what color is my sweater also brown but more Brown like the ocean oh what you don't have a childhood dream of being a pilot do you Chef Sam you won the last challenge so Chef Eileen will present first sounds good okay Shailene tell us about your dish um today I've prepared for you a game hen stir fry with shallots and tomatoes on a bed of wild rice and top charred Teragon wow all right let's dig in nervous you know sometimes taking a bite of food reminds you that you're so hungry you're we really going for it it's like someone stopped me ear at the whole thing right [Music] are you going to just give me a [Music] second well alen I think it's safe to say our judge liked your dish that was a mistake I ate that too fast I'm flattered that you wanted to eat the whole thing I was just really hungry and something kicked in there's a blur um do you have any comments on the dish itself I mean I feel like I could not tell you what I just ate it's just like shoveling fuel I am not feeling good right now that's too fast how can we be helpful here you know if I weren't on TV right now I would unbutton my pant button you know what maybe we should move on um Chef Sam would you like to present yours sure um so my dish is a braed short rib with asparagus oh yeah that's going to be a pass for me what it's just not I think it's none for me you're not going to try the second dish that you're judging no no no um yeah if you eat as much chicken as I just ate you would also be saying yeah there's no way in hell that that doesn't really seem fair are you sure you couldn't just do one little bite I mean I'll try it but yeah that's not that's not what my body wants right now maybe you could just judge like the appearance like like how does the sear look the visual is just a really big part of the food experience and I'm just so full that I don't want to be thinking about even what it looks like Okay um then how do you want to do this I don't know like it's not your guys's fault that I got too full yeah I don't think any of us feel responsible for that so I guess I say just like um have them wrestle or like fight and whoever wins moves on like that one looks like a dog oh yeah with the like the little tail and it's like kind of wagging it where I don't see it it's like right above that Hill yeah just right up there you're pointing up it's like right right there unless the dog's in an airplane I think you're mistaken not a real dog a just a cloud so cloud looks like a dog oh so this is like a game that you guys like to play I mean it's not like a formal game it's just like saying what you think the clouds look like You' never done that no no and what do they look like well it's kind of subjective it's kind of up to you it could be anything like even something that's inappropriate yeah sure I guess yeah was overwhelmed by the possibility of it all it's like you can't get mad at me because it's not me doing it it it's the sky like I didn't make the sky yeah I've never thought about that one kind of looks like a boat oh yeah I kind of see that I see two people absolutely getting it on in broad daylight it's not supposed to be like coming up with but they're up there in the you actually see that that's the thing is I'm not saying it the guy saying saying Stu and being taking a plop on the ground we don't have to play this game anymore whoa guys look oh my God a come on timing it to me that one looks like a penguin one day she showed up and then she was just sort of there at work when I took a shower I brush my teeth I'll admit that I detested her that ridiculous gear AR can't be that dangerous her silence why won't you talk every day I inched closer to Madness what do you want money hey Jan you want anything from the store I'm okay thank you my family didn't really understand what I was going through only I can see you I can see the hockey filter on your she was my demon alone now I'd like to introduce my good friend who you all know and love that's right it's Billy bearcub excuse me for a second where's your I can't find my Billy bear suit I've looked everywhere for it oh no you're going to have to tell them Billy's sick are you crazy no well I can't go out like this look at me I've been introducing Billy bearcub for 10 years and one thing I've learned is that it's about a lot more than the costume I just don't really would Billy bearcub run away and hide if he made one mistake no no so go out there and leave it all in the court okay okay I'll see you out there everyone say hi to Billy that's not Billy this person isn't even dressed like Billy bearcub it's all right just IGN Billy likes Long Winter naps and eating honey this sucks Billy show us your growl girl [ __ ] you fake Billy God don't talk to my best friend like that I got this hey I think we've all forgotten why we're here is it to see a realistic bear costume or is it cheer on the home team Che on the home team I may not be a bear but I sleep in a cave and I eat bees just to say I'm a bear at heart wow despite not wearing a costume you're the billi bear of them all [Applause] I we're all here um my girlfriend's in the audience and I just want to ask her in front of all of you not the time that's okay relationships are about communication bears eat bees mm okay so if anyone draws their own name we'll all draag again cool okay what if we draw someone else's name that's fine right yeah that's good that's what we want what if we pick someone that we don't like it's just the four of us do you dis like one of the four of us no no no no no what if we pick someone who we don't know yeah what if we get a slip and it's like Steph bronwood from college that will not happen how can you be sure though I like Steph well enough but I just I would have no idea what to get him for a gift there's only four names and it's are four names so everyone just pick one and I'm worried that if I get Steph the wrong thing he'll think that I'm a loser really you're worried about that I'm serious I'm nervous about it I'm sure you'll get him the perfect thing thanks that means a lot I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it does everyone have a slip did anyone pick thems I got um Phoebe no don't I got you guys it's supposed to be a secret thank you you're not supposed to look at the name oh well you're allowed to you can read your own slip oh okay I got Ryan I wish I gotten Ryan what the hell I don't know if this is coming together probably just going to get a a gift for stiff brownman from college to be safe since my slip says your name does that mean you're the one who helps me figure out what to get Steph Brown up next is a private dinner for two at the restaurant of celebrity chef and Franklin parent s March woo we your biggest fans wow thank you that's very kind really we're going to do everything in our power to win looks like we already have some Front Runners who are in costume above and beyond so much we just have it out all right love the enthusiasm okay let's start the bidding off at 120 800 800 whoa well we certainly won't say no to a donation like that but you sure you don't want to start at least a little bit lower we discussed it and we're willing to spend $800 fair enough well I have a feeling this one is yours but I'll do the obligatory going once 800 great to see another Contender um that is where we were already $800 we have to go up in a bitd war up from 800 R are like so straight forward this is why you start lower can we go a little bit we we can move some stuff around do not move stuff around for this terrible us back but I think we could go 850 $850 okay $850 $850 damn oh my God I want to make it clear this person in the back has not yet made a real Biden pal this means a lot to my wife and I why don't you call it and we'll buy you dinner somewhere else nice no chance I think Simone is the most beautiful woman in the world that's very nice I'll use the dinner as an opportunity to get to know her in a romantic and hopefully sexual way oh that's a little my Plus One will be my most sophisticated pair of pants I actually don't feel comfortable with any of that so I'm going to disqualify you can't disqualify me if I win yes I can I can right you totally can this isn't really a legally binding thing 850 stop saying 850 850 hi there a few of you might notice that instead of its usual medium brown color my hair is now platinum blonde I just wanted to hop on here to say that I know change is scary but just because my hair's changed doesn't mean that I've changed for as long as hey uh J this is Stuart my wonderful assistant I'm just going to put in the coffee order so if do you want anything yeah could you please get two large coffees one for me and one for yourself when I think of the word role model um I'm sorry TR I I don't drink coffee do you just one for done thanks when I think of the word role model I need to get one of those theres by check out I don't know Stuart did I say um get yourself one of the thermoses by check out coffee okay I'm going to go I'll coffee great great thanks Stuart no problem for as long as I can remember I'm Sor this is the last thing where are your car keys I just is this the steuart looking for car keys video no but is this about you looking for car keys it's about you being down to it's about me being down to Earth even with your blonde hair even with my blonde hair so I'd appreciate it if it's it's just it's raining kind of hard outside if you want someone who's going to hold your hand and smooth feed you go work for the demilios okay this is a workplace I'd much rather my child grow up to be kind than smart Stuart I want you to be really honest with me do you think uh this take is still salvageable um I think maybe you come off a little bit yeah I think it's fine too I decided Ed to take matters into my own hands and took a poll of eight people walking past me in the park the numbers don't lie three people said oranges four people said apples one passer by said excuse me my name is Tony lemlin and I'm looking for a beautiful woman in a wide brimmed hat I said I got bad news for you pal and I said why I said one of the participants in yesterday's poll heavily implied that someone is trying to kill you he said what what did they say I said well they think my pole is flawed because lamps and flowers Ser completely different functions he said no not the pole I mean What did the what did they say about trying to K and I said oh misunderstanding then he said give me all the cash in your wallet and something about the way he was holding the knife I could now see that he had made me really want to listen to him it seems like an apple a day is what keeps the doctor away just feel like we've been kind of like stagnant okay and don't if that's because I feel like I'm not growing or the relationship isn't growing those are good things to be thinking about so yeah just would love your thoughts um I'm just going to Ben yeah I hope you don't mind no I don't I mean mind what Ben will you come here for a sec what's up okay tell Ben what you just told me I'm sorry who is this I'm Ben sorry that's Ben um I thought these were confidential oh they are they are they're just a couple of exceptions it's in it's in the contract it's really in there whenever you're ready um I guess I I'm having a hard time figuring out whether I'm dissatisfied with my own life or in the relationship are you guys still like dinking that's a good question I'm sorry what is your relation ship to each other like are you her assistant sadly I cannot disclose that to you that would be a violation of patient confidentiality what yeah that's in the contract too yeah can I see that see it says counselor can't say who Ben is very boiler plate a lot of peanut butter oh man it's okay if you're busy well I have more sessions all afternoon is the thing could she go oh uh maybe could you could I go get Ben more peanut but oh that'd be great would you mind um and you know I actually think it could be good for your relationship with your partner let might give her some clarity totally can tell her to get Chunky my name is Jane wickline and this is my application for the 2021 Summer Olympics I'm submitting this tape the www. Olympics and Oscars application website backsystem alert.net along with my $90 application fee I'm open to tennis [Music] baseball football and even running I'm a good teammate on and off the field hey good job out there and I can't swim but I'm willing to learn what are you playing cards we are playing cards mind if I join you no just a spectator pretend I'm not here I'm do a three yes me too nice would you like to switch sure I'm going to play this card now is this a real game yes of course of course the score sheet we have a score sheet it just says 10 because we are both 10 years old no it's because we both have 10 points Mr Sunset there's a man with a knife he's kidnapped the mayor's daughter you're needed sorry ladies crime waits for no one I'm coming for you sweetie there's a lot yeah do you want to switch threes I do thanks for doing this for sure which one did I get we're not allowed to say for the photo shoot part cuz if we did some people might not want to pose that's weird can you would you mind holding this oh okay and could you try this on cuz you do like a ah stinky am I stinkiest no no no can I get a thumbs down it just feels like maybe it's not a good one if you could try to minimize talking while we're doing this part hey I'm a little early there's that smile why does she get to know well cuz her's best smile I'm not feeling great about myself right now I'll be real um people have said my smile has a calming effect I don't want to intrude but maybe it would help that's not necessary yeah that's a very generous offer I think that wouldn't hurt how did did that work I know it made me feel better I don't even know how to respond to that this jovia little sausage monster is called the small intestine it doesn't really have eyes right no it doesn't yeah it's just a cartoon next slide this guy is called well looks like Josh forgot to um label this one okay I'll just tell you this is the heart really the heart is your guess for that okay um last thing was a small intestine moving right along okay this one I'm pretty sure is the heart that's tough all right I can take over from here what are your weaknesses um I would say listening I'm not a great listener oh is that just a really bad answer to that yeah I think I wrote that down on a list of things not to say look at me I'm not even listening now one more time oh sorry my wife I cut out second chance aler okay weaknesses yes I said I'm not a good listener sounds like you're the one is a bad listener no the person sending you this thinks you are the bees knes speaking of bees you may be getting a piece of mail in the next few days with information about a class action lawsuit before you do anything drastic keep in mind that all the children on the field trip including your son were ultimately fine keep being your amazing self and though the person sending this to you cannot apologize without admitting fault if they could they would apologize to you about the bees on on the field trip oh Brian you're stupid and dumb and I hate you reverse psychology oldest trick in the book Brian doesn't even know I'm flirting with him Buffalo Bills won't come out tonight hi can I get one ticket going anywhere I've never seen one of these in real life before there's this girl and I just need to get to the other side all right this is so romantic yeah I made a big mistake well with a gesture like this I'm sure she'll forgive you it's not really about forgiveness um I'm sorry I'm really in a hurry yes sorry um I have a Cincinnati for 75 Cleveland for 90 what about Indonesia yeah that'll be a lot more I had $6,000 in cash okay um we have there's one at 11:00 p.m. no that's too late you're not getting on the plane doesn't really matter I am getting on the plane you are why not use the ticket two birds do you have anything in China or most of North Africa is fine you said you were in a hurry but I can look S one second yeah I'm getting it now no Portugal has an extradition treaty uh I have to go you know I don't think I've actually asked for ID yet we need that to book the flight [ __ ] sh Pretend We're talking we are talking Pretend We're talking are you fleeing no it's not anything bad I am I'm the good guy here you like a whistleblower who I was whistle blown it's not good [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] sh Pretend We're talking we are talking I was the Hitman no we're a prominent company yeah I need you to stop telling me about it I appreciate your help you've been a huge Aid well wait no I mean it you've really eded me I thought you were trying to catch up with a girl before she got on a plane I am oh The Whistleblower oh I'm fleeing the feds and she's fleeing me right one last job before I disappear job is to tell her that I love her it's actually really sweet I have a Montenegro that leaves in 30 minutes really I'm always willing to help a love story along you have no idea how much that means don't worry about it now what is the tsa's policy on guns so I think you take a green cup if you're single an orange cup if you're in a relationship it's so cute I know Rebecca is such a creative host it's honestly really useful there's not really a cup for my situation actually I think blue means it's complicated it's not complicated it's very simple what's your situation I'm in a relationship with the King what king if there if one of the options were a gold chalice I might feel differently but the king of what as far as the eye can see like of New York City at least I'm talking about the United States of America there isn't a king here look it up and I think you'll see my perspective no King there isn't a king no not even one look again well someone is lying to me where did you meet this guy he was in a thr or was it just a chair I'm doubting everything now I actually didn't catch your name how do you know Rebecca I heard laughter from the streets okay this isn't really an open party all right I figured out what cup I want now one of each and 12 sets of Cutlery and 12 plates first category is going to be colors easy enough second category is of course going to be first names of wives in movies where alen Alda plays a supporting rule BR we love the work you do but no don't say it connections is having a big moment right now we just wonder if it would be time to scale up you want to turn this into some soulless 40 person operation wouldn't you like to have a team to work with this isn't the crossword it's not meant to be solved in a Harvard office the it's it's all over the map again we need things that are I understand people New York Times connections is meant to be solved by one baby and one genius looking at the same phone can I show you one more I think you're going to like it it's bat bat bat and bat what these are words words that sound similar would a focus group lead you to that no because doesn't make any sense flight 372 uh I think they called our boarding number wait let's let's hold out on them a little longer what let's make them squirm a little uh who let's make the plane come to us how would it let's make the plane let's to track the plane what flight attendance you think that we can buy a ticket and it's that easy you you bought the ticket I'm going to hang back so good yeah I'm so full hey um when are we going to talk oh my God can we not do this right now well if if not now can we just pick a time to talk about we have talked about this we haven't really like you still some things can be private in a friendship I don't read your texts and emails that's not the same thing how is it not you driving 18 wheel commercial truck and won't tell me what is in it well I won't tell the government what's in it either Leva I need you to tell me what is in this giant vehicle what if you just pretend it's a regular car do you know how crazy it makes me feel when we pull this thing up to a restaurant sorry I don't drive a Mercedes Benz no don't turn this into a money thing this truck cost $150,000 it's worth twice that okay three times if you count what's in it what's in it it's just nice to have a truck okay you moved last week and you didn't use this you rented another truck because this one is full of [Music] what wait is there metal in this um yeah no that's not good I'm basically a giant magnet what I'm full of metal I'm basically a giant magnet if I so much as eat this there would be even more metal in me wait is this moving Jane is typing more quickly than usual I hope she isn't writing a letter to the governor about me wait I'm being ridiculous of course she isn't writing to the governor dear Governor Melissa at you in my room I have an archive of dried beans sourced from across the globe each day while I'm at work my friend won't stop housing those beans like a pizza Governor whenever I go into Jane's room and see her catalog of beans I find myself unsure if my eyes tell the truth I eat one and sure enough it's a dried Bean then I leave I urge you to pass some sort of Bill making taking things that aren't yours illegal Governor maybe you can call it no secretly taking I've got to get ahead of this a minute leave us typ in quickly now could they be writing to the governor's husband what am I talking about of course they're not writing to the governor's husband Dear Mr auu keep your woman in line I am one of her constituents and I'm worried she's getting a dangerous letter about prohibiting secretly taking from a confused Banshee on her period Governor I'm worried my friend is telling your husband I'm menstrating please if men could get periods you'd be able to get one at the ATM I know you will agree with me girl by the way Mr ATU I'm not sure who I'm going to vote for in November who's running Governor I'd be remiss if I didn't ask who's running in November can you send their names and a little about e don't let that woman take away my right to take if I get it then I have it understand what you working on just my taxes great me too do you prefer eggs and toast or cereal eggs and toast okay favorite color what is this quiz for it's just a blood test oh cool um orange no do they don't have orange they have green and which Friends character do you most identify with Joey they can analyze my blood from this yeah this is the official website huh I want to change my answer to Phoebe I think yeah you're not a joey you know it's funny I thought they had to take like a sample of your blood through a tube what it's 2024 it's not the Dark Ages we also don't do blood lighting anymore sorry yeah that probably sounded dumb it's like asking how can you call someone from a phone that's not attached to the ground okay okay who's your slab Crush danda Berry do they have rooster in the TV version of Annie that Kathy Bates is in actually yes and the results are in how did I do okay there's good news and there's bad news the bad news is herpes I already had that the good news is that you are universal recipient wait so that means that means that whenever you want you can have as much blood as you want as much as I want anytime you want as much as you want wait look land land oh my God we're saved oh we're going to die on this boat full team ahead hi I wait actually what's up there's land behind you too and I think it's closer land over there too well this is an embarrassment of riches saved in two directions three look oh that land over there might be closest of all it's all connected we seem to be working with almost 365° of land is this a lake are we in a lake wait let me try the water that's fresh water oh my God I thought I heard cars how did we miss this do you think we didn't have to eat Renee no we had to no I know I just wonder that TR that seems like the closest one well maybe we should wait out here a couple more days why would we do that just like so when we tell everyone that we ate Renee they're definitely like like that had to happen they will we've been in an impossible situation just wonder if this being a lake changes things 36 hours is more than enough time to get hungry the body begins burning fat after less in a day how do you know it's been 36 hours it's clock you've had a phone I found it on Renee you know what's funny is I pull it out to make a call asking for help it literally has four bars I realize I don't know a single phone number I swear technology is making us stupider by the minute do you want me to take it oh that's very kind yes I would love that yeah no problem three two one shiver me timbers this Unapologetic [ __ ] looks good and knows it no doubt she's got the Miranda Cunningham stamp of approval a that's a cute one I'm sorry I was actually sort of looking for a photo oh no worries yeah yeah okay of Me Okay Diva sh on my Timber the gr chat will be full of heart reacts with this Unapologetic [ __ ] I can hear you Whispering then I might as well speak shiver all those Timbers she'd be a great addition to any workplace I really just want one still I know you think you want a photo but you'll be really happy to have this and you're applying to jobs I'm certain I won't well I posted a couple so you have some options posted on your Instagram they're flopping okay uh I think I might just ask someone else no please I can do it I really need this job this isn't a job I'm not going to pay you the stepping stone towards something that might please okay okay yeah oh thank you thank you a normal portrait got it no commentary you're not going to regret this three you can take off your clothes whenever okay give that back you'll have to catch me first look I didn't kill my husband okay right but it really looks like you did to a jury what is that stop using all these fancy lawyer terms I just don't understand why you didn't tell me that there was a voice memo taken of the entire thing but I forgot about it I am your lawyer if I'm going to defend you I can show it to you it's barely relevant you're crazy you don't know how crazy I can get oh my God you're holding a knife and pointing it at me I am and I'll use it too here I go I'm starting now ah you're stabbing me you're stabbing me again and again just a few more stabs to go there he's dead I think you'll agree I come across is basically adorable okay you have to plead guilty if you plead guilty you go to jail what kind of lawyer doesn't know that if you kill someone you go to jail I'll kill you too no I'm kidding I want you to meet someone this is Greta oh hey isn't she amazing uh yeah we actually know each other wait how um I think it was Dustin's half show yeah and also just same friends wait that's so crazy we kind of had a moment wait what like what do you mean oh got like seemed like something was going to happen between us so what happened like nothing happened but it was just like we were just hanging out a lot and then like this moment where her sister was in town I wasn't in like a meeting or family way but she did introduce me as like someone I've been spending time with what does that mean I don't know but and then it fizzled into did it seem like there was like a VI between us I don't know her hair is short did it used to be different yeah it was like long like if you saw if you sorry here sad I don't know think would there be a reason oh I don't know just curious Tony keeps trying to talk on the phone before we hang out she's going to break up with me no I hate when we talk about [Music] you we must live our lives in complete silence because the monsters have an acute sense of hearing it's day 15 who knows how much longer we can are you serious H hey time out to any monsters uh pal has the hiccups no just need to pause while we figure this hi guys what's up Jen keep it down the monsters have an acute sense of hearing oh my God I forgot you are lucky that Hal has a hicups and we happen to be on a timeout with the monsters all right well I'm going to head out try drinking some water like we wouldn't have tried drinking water the monster could help us maybe what do you mean if the monster is around you could do something really scary which would cure me of my hiccups that's so smart then we could unpause sooner and that would benefit everyone wow that's what you guys look like yeah what what's wrong smaller than I thought well it's it's more like creepy scary it's not jump scary yeah I guess it's like surprising but not like scary I ate your friend last week I know and I hated that heit I have an idea do one of you have a glass of water we've already tried no listen it's it's different just try drinking it from like the other side like upside down oh like around the yeah I think it worked that is amazing yeah it works every time want to untime out all right wait wait I'm so sorry sorry stop again I have a meeting hey do you mind if I turn the vacuum on no go for it boy is whle hard what are you doing what you're not vacuuming turn it off oh I just like it you can't just turn on the vacuum just to have it on you should you would well I thought the noise would be out way by the benefit of you cleaning but you're not cleaning well I hate writing in silence why don't you play something on your computer okay no no is better no no no no can you just put on like rain sounds Rain Sound where on your computer recording that seems really weird but what the hell is it this is amazing yeah how did you think of it you didn't it's very common I love that there are no horns at the happy Bean we really value customer input so what are some things you don't love about your morning coffee routine can't eat the cup you can't eat the cup but I wish you could okay but also just like stuff about the experience there's nowhere to meet people to get it with I don't really know a single person I can ask okay uh I guess I will write down loneliness perfect yeah any thoughts that are specific to coffee it's okay if not it tastes disgusting coffee I hate it should be made out of fruit should be juice strawberry and mango strawberry mango but I don't want any ice I'm actually not taking your order and I'm also interested in being able to eat the cup let's move on I'm going to list some features in a coffee shop and you can tell me how important they are to you out of 10 okay reasonably priced one one convenient one variety of options certainly don't care about that what do you care about uh my mom is in the hospital I'm sorry I care about my job it's not easy work but it's worth it to see the look on my clients faces when they see their four-legged friends with brand new haircuts just another reminder I'm talking about features of a coffee store I care about my books they're there for me when no one else's and fruit maybe if both of us are lonely we we get coffee together sometime I think we run in different circles just tell you about our new product um it's customer operated coffee machine where you can have your drink ready with just the push of a button how is that supposed to help any of us yeah I don't know your problems all seem to run much deeper than the options on my form we were told that our voices would matter here would you be interested in a chai smoothie I don't know that would completely depend on the flavor of the cup Excuse Me Miss um here you go oh um it's a straw thank you you know what take a couple more I'm really um I'm okay well just in case no I don't need more straws it's totally not an imposition they're free I know they're free just going to leave this here what is this are you mad at me no we don't know each other strangers could still be mad at me I'm one person drinking a hot beverage the number of straws I need is zero but the number of straws you deserve is infinity I take a straw if there are enough left after I'm finished giving this one straws I'll pass one to you no you can be I'm fine I'd only need one for my iced drink you don't need one pardon no one ever needs straws you can always drink out of the side if you want to but I'd like one would you like a sugar packet no I'd like a sugar packet you're sort of a pushy type of woman and I don't know if I like that I just want to be offered something yeah everyone wants to be offered something the story is offering all of us both sugar packets and straws they're free they're in the box they're available they're not being offered it's completely different when someone gives it to you personally he well then I will offer each of you a straw oh that is really generous of you you so didn't have to do that really says a lot about your character now we all have the number of straws we need or don't need or want are these paper I didn't make them I feel like I'm eating a business card how far out do you think we need to get before we're officially like at Sea I would say we're at Sea now you think yeah yeah cuz it's sea all the way around like there's no remaining land on the on the on the edge yeah what is the word for that part I thing is just Edge honestly I couldn't tell you which way we even came from which is cool I was telling my boss about this to ask for a time off she was like what's your destination and I was sort of like well the sea is the destination it's like the destination is the Sea and the journey and she was like oh maybe you should have a real destination and bring an expert with you well she sounds like a real land lover lber what a lber I don't know maybe it is lber well either way I'm having a great time I wonder now that we're here like I wonder how long people usually stay at Sea I think just as long as they want cuz my boss might have had a couple points I'm wondering if she was right about us bringing that map I mean she was really like you shouldn't do this are you having second thoughts no no not about coming a little about the map here's the Stars it's Nature's map yeah but we don't really know about stars the biggest thing is the moon the second biggest thing is North is land to North I'm sure North is eventually there's land I think maybe I'm just hungry B see there's a sea full of fish just waiting to be snacked on they're all down there I don't know how to get them do you know how to get them I don't know how to help you in this mood you're in are you what are you thirsty yeah I'm also thirsty well behind your behind you there's the BR filter I brought it to to separate the salt out BR filters don't do that we talked about this you need to be more open-minded if this is going to be fun okay we are in an amazing position we're at Sea yeah I guess being at Sea is a huge accomplishment in itself it's a huge accomplishment in and of itself it's so early we don't have to worry about water supply or navigation or who would eat who if it came to that exactly for now we're just two friends at Sea great do you know swim no are we still hungry $20 is a little steep for a dessert well it's expensive to make a restaurant rotate yeah that's the other thing I wanted to ask um is there maintenance happening what do you mean cuz we don't seem to be spinning I see the confusion the spinning happens very slowly I can see that car out the window it's the exact same spot it was 40 minutes ago and sometimes the feeling of dizziness can make people confused I'm not confused I'm pretty sure I'm not dizzy now many of our customers really love our 360° Creme Brule how does one of those sound no I have more questions okay fine I thought the Space Needle restaurant was at the top of the Space Needle building our first location is um this is our second location which is the bottom of this different building cuz I checked on maps and this place doesn't have an unobstructed view all the way around like there's a Target attached to the other side a rotation technology is perfectly safe when applied to a retail store are you saying that the target behind us is rotating too I'm saying that it's easy to find disappointment if you're looking for it can you just look me in the eyes and tell me that this place is spinning the theme of this place is spinning restaurant that was not my question okay ma'am cards on the table I don't like when we do this but we can offer you your entire meal free of charge if you're willing to write a Yelp review saying that it spins so the whole meal the salmon for one the mac and cheese starter with extra cheese sauce the hamburger to go for your roommate well you don't need to do that I know what I got and all you need to do is write one review saying you're wrong the restaurant spins I came here because the reviews said it spins yes those reviews are very important to potential customers many of their authors made choices just like the one you're about to you're the devil I don't know what you're talking about Okay so don't freak out I went to those traveling salesman guys again Emperor no no no no but just the guys that sold under the invisible robe yes listen a wise Emperor is someone who turns their enemies into subjects that's why my poison tester is someone who tried to poison me like a bunch of times still don't agree with that choice anyway the salesman told me that this shirt um you can only see it if you're like really smart how are you falling for this again okay but guys here's the thing the issue last time was that I was lying but I like literally can see this I don't know what to say am I naked to you cuz I'm to me I'm not I'm literally just wearing a shirt I swear have you considered that it could be a normal shirt it's a regular shirt no it's a it's a magic shirt I definitely got some really weird looks on the walk home okay like the exact kinds of looks you would give if you saw someone naked is it a feature that you want in a piece of clothing that to some people it's invisible and you're naked well no yeah so then that's just it's just how the shirt works but why keep seeking out something that you don't cuz I could see the shirt so that means do you think if I tried to return this they would trade me back our army what are you writing letter it's to her cousin oh he's is it's soccer practice no Owen I told you I'm with my friends just get a ride from someone else I think she should add a sentence before you launch into that I'm liking the new job so far to answer your question I'm with my friends so I can't pick you up yeah that's better he's at practice right now mhm I I'll get the letter what Thursday oh I'm not going to mail it fr's going to run it over yeah it's only 10 minutes away you're driving there to give him this you can ask one of your teammates or check a bus schedule or check a bus schedule can't you just you can't no we explain it all in the letter oh hey Tony hey guys I was just at the park and I let to pass along this letter practice is over and I'd still love to get a ride Tony said I wasn't allowed to ride with her and that you are working on a letter that will explain why who was not happy about that anyway it's raining pretty hard so let me know is as soon as you can does anyone know a word I can use instead of situation predicament predicament seems like a problem what's the rest of the sentence I'm sorry why can't one of you just give him a ride I barely have time to write this explanation to Owen I'll write you a letter tomorrow okay you can just tell me the letter will clear up why she can't hi I'm here to do some carols oh great take it away yeah um what song do you want do you know Jingle Bells yeah I know Jingle Bells okay whenever you're ready whenever I'm ready you know what I'm not ready oh thought I was but now seeing these lights in the tree I can't do it I can't are you okay you have to spread teer to your yourself first whatever is going on you definitely don't have to sing I got in a big fight with a family member who's my aunt I'm not going to tell you more than that that's fine she usually gets me a really nice sweater scarf around this time of year so it's an emotional loss but it's also a material one ever since my fight with my aunt Everything feels really confusing to me and I thought I could put a little joy out there maybe that energy would make its way back to me but I swear I've never felt more alone in my life than when you opened that door just now sorry and I can't just turn it on every time someone answers the door because I ring the doorbell yeah of course not just sing a song about reindeers on a sleigh yeah I wouldn't want that if you it's like what about me I'm going to spread Joy but who's going to spread the joy to me um I have some oatmeal cookies inside if you want to come in and get warm no I have a lot of other houses to hit you're going to other houses just because I'm not up to it now doesn't mean I'll stop trying I've gone to 30 houses already today and every time it went exactly like this ear shift can be a little sticky sometimes not a problem and would you like to be part of our valet Derby pardon basically are you cool with this using your C for a little race oh no please don't do that you sure a car like that has a great shot at winning I don't want you to race anyone in my car all right is that it can I head inside well I'll go through the rest of my questions anyway just in case sure so just what's your car's like acceleration um yeah I have no idea okay then what's the offroad like the offroad like is it good at clearing through muddy ditches and brambles and that kind of thing it's is a Prius I used it to visit my parents in San Diego hey we almost ready to roll hey Tyler this one is having some doubts about keeping her wheels in the race well I was never in but we are working it out and you must be Karina I've heard so much about you Tyler would be the one representing you today you've got a really special ride there now a little about me is I'm as fast on the road as I am responsible it actually doesn't make me feel better that you would wear a helmet in the car you never know what will happen on the road I may die I may total your car but one thing's for goddamn certain is I'll bring back the gold Kina it's pretty inspiring huh yeah I still don't understand how I seem to have been factored into the planning of this me and Tyler have each wagered $200 of our own personal money on your car winning the whole thing that's how confident we are wow so what do you say we could park your car in a quiet spot or you could be part of something really special the choice is yours I'm going to take these back and for street parking really come on boo I just have this feeling that you guys are going to use my car in your thing no matter what I decide and you know what you would be right about that feeling hi we can set up wherever you need us you guys are really late we're so sorry which one of you is the Santa the party's starting in a minute so unfortunately all of the agencies Santas are sick are you serious fortunately bad case of the naughties they have Co well can't one of you do it we just need someone in the suit we don't have any we near enough training to be Santa so we will be performing his two classic Christmas polar bears you're not even going to be elves we don't have anywhere near enough training to be elves what does that mean why don't we just tell you how our thing will go okay party go will approach us at the polar bear chair and tell us about a time when they felt cold then beard will say everyone gets cold sometimes take it from two polar bears then Leah hands them a box of snow caps and we send them on their way yeah I don't know I don't know if I really get it snow caps are Chocolate Drops covered in white sprinkles no I know that they're not very good my point is that this seems more complicated than just asking what people want for Christmas you just can't do Santa stuff it takes 6 years of training to be a Santa it does that's why we have over 30 OnStaff polar bears and only two Santas despite no one ever ordering polar bears yeah I think I would prefer an underqualified Santa to this polar bear thing and we would prefer almost any other candy to snow caps but we can't offer you that could I just get like a refund no but we can throw in four additional classic Christmas polar bears I don't want that they're probably already on their way the agency sends extras cuz otherwise they're just sitting around so we didn't bring costumes so do you have any like white sweaters or t-shirts we could borrow how did you guys know each other um I was his girlfriend sorry who are you I was in his watercolor class he was not a good artist okay the front row is really supposed to be for family oh I guess we're both breaking the rules then excuse me your boyfriend was a really kind man but his paintings were so bad that I thought that he was doing it on purpose I don't remember him taking a watercolor class how how recent was this like 8 years ago n we didn't really stay in touch after hey Bailey is there a room in this row can I join you of course the more the marrier no don't worry Bailey was also in the watercolor class hi how' you guys know each other I was his girlfriend huh I never saw you at bring your girlfriend to watercolor class today this area really is isn't for friends don't say that about yourself you totally deserve to be up here you guys I'm talking about you guys oh I wouldn't say I was friends with them yeah Dylan actually hated Billy but he really respected her ability to paint snowy pine trees what are you talking about I painted these really accurate snowy pine trees and Dylan respected me for that even if he didn't like me this is a memorial service for Garrett Fielding oh we're not the right my God are we at the wrong funeral I used to hate the water I can't imagine why so that's the famous Jaws you guys see why that's one of my favorites that was a well-made movie for sure there's something about it that just doesn't really sit right yeah I feel the same way e um what part I mean the shark the shark for me as well is it like a an animal cruelty thing yeah it was an animal cruelty thing cuz it wasn't a real shark and I would imagine it wasn't real swimmers but that doesn't make what Jaws did okay what Jaws did Jaws was a menace to all kinds of people who were just trying to go to the beach so glad they caught him of course I'm glad they caught him in the end but it shouldn't have cost them so much the shark was being really unpredictable and making things a lot tougher for the town not to mention he was killing and eating the town's people oh you're talking about um I'm not rooting for the killer shark when I watch this they clearly wanted us to empathize with the shark I why else would they have made a him so handsome same thought their decision to make the shark so handsome felt like they were tacitly condoning what he was doing you both thought the shark was handsome I don't think we're the first people to say that about Daniel Craig thought the shark was Daniel Craig we should have just watched March of the penguins like usual okay best memory with our birthday girl was probably the sunrise hike we went on this summer oh my God that was so much fun and worst memory with Kelly is probably um February 8th when she crashed my dad's car and I had to miss my sister's wedding cuz we were all in the hospital hey guys um do we have to do best memory worst memory this year it's your birthday come on we do this every year okay I I best for me would definitely be snowboarding that was so much fun and then worst would be 2 Days Later February 8th when we were all driving back and we were all saying no Kelly don't turn there's a car coming and Kelly was like I have time I just think we maybe all have the same worst memory this year and it's something I feel guilt about every single day mine isn't the accident you got us into actually it isn't mine was a few hours after when the doctor told me that I would have to set the rest of my season out it's very much still a memory of the accident also I wasn't there for that probably just felt like you were there cuz of how mad at you I was Sandra didn't say a best memory maybe my best memory of you is like every memory before February 8th because it fundamentally changed our friendship wait that's a really good one I want to change my answer to that my name is Pat I'm from Michigan and I have 32 teeth cool okay just a reminder everyone the check-in question is what's your favorite color I'll go next I'm bar I have 32 teeth and my favorite color is blue so okay and the middle question is where you from none of the questions or how many teeth do you have that was what I was picking for my fun fact I can see that was confusing there's also no fun fact what about favorite color can we say your favorite color yeah that's what we're yeah do say your favorite color what if in order to honestly answer that question we do need to answer the teeth question are you suggesting that the number of teeth you have is the necessary context for what your favorite color is I don't know it's just like a what if really worried that I'm going to answer the wrong questions this isn't a test just like introduce yourself okay I have 31 teeth I think the question was how many teeth would you like oh no the question is what is your name Anna and how many teeth would you like mine is done oh that's cute I love him having kind of a kind of a weird time with mine wait I want to see well cuz I was thinking I wanted to carve something that would be like useful but then it it just show me okay um so thinking like U stop drop and roll yeah no I I see what then I ran out of room uhhuh guess I'm confused about why your carving stop Dro and roll into the pumpkin just in case something happened like if there were like fire pumpkins have candles and like that could be a fire hazard yeah yeah um good thinking is my pumpkin dumb do you think no no I guess people know to stop drop and roll would you think it was dumb if you saw it like at someone's house I would think it was dumb no I think I I think I would probably be like what sure sure what if you on fire well if I were on fire I'd only know two of the things you need to do are you making fun of me no no I'm sorry I'm having some serious second thoughts about my pumpkin try to carve my letters into the shape of a face maybe try to Pivot maybe I mean you made them pretty big could I carve the word roll into the bottom of your pumpkin and we put them next to each other so it at least makes sense I kind of just don't want my pumpkin to be part of your stop drop and roll thing okay sorry I think I'm going to run to the store and get another pumpkin try again okay and then maybe on that one I can write something instead like always wear a seat belt or even just careful why do you feel like your pumpkin has to have a safety message I just want make sure my next pumpkin accomplishes everything it needs to because I feel pretty embarrassed about messing up and I don't want to do it again this is so not worth stressing over okay here's what I'm going to do going to get another pumpkin I'm going to carve words rock and roll into it the roll are right in the same font as these ones and then I'll place them so that it can be r as finishing it so that way I'll have one cool pumpkin and one safety pumpkin you think do you think it's a dumb plan no no I think it's a great plan really happy Halloween I'm looking for olives and cups okay um we just sell hot sauce you only have hot sauce yeah this is a hot sauce stand Gill's hot sauce you only have one thing so so we interested yeah it's a farmer market it's kind of the whole idea are you a farmer I'm not a farmer no but all of our ingredients come from local farms huh would you like a sample of our new hot sauce I I don't know if I want to buy sauce today my list only has the olives and the cups on it you wouldn't have to buy it that's why you sample it to just see if you like it okay thanks do you think there might be a cup stand here there's a pottery stand and they might have a pack of Cups pack of Cups like the red ones they're like plastic no it would be like ceramic mugs I might buy like 10 of your sauces I think wow um I'm glad you liked it no I was thinking I could empty them out and use them as cup no offense okay I think you will find what you're looking for at the grocery store the grocery store yeah they'll have the kind of Cups you're thinking of okay do you think they might also have olives yeah they'll have olives and do you think they'll have a winter coat for me to get um cuz I'm also lightly looking for a winter coat it doesn't have to be today for today my list just has doids and the cups on it but if I saw a really great one in the back of my mind it's like okay that's something that I would buy yeah I'd say probably not on the coat but the other two things youve been really really helpful to me today I'm going to buy 10 of your sauces before I go you don't have to do that I insist I think it would make me sad to know that you're getting dumped out like that not going to dump them out I'm going to drink them because you're so helpful to me so this is real we're getting a divorce it's been a long time coming I guess better now than 10 years from now what are we going to do about our good friend good times Garla your divorce is tearing me apart or my name isn't good times Gara and it is I just heard missed so many things about you I'll miss your laugh I'll miss the way whenever we go out to dinner good time scarla always asks for a box for her leftovers could I get a box for the rest of this the most brutal bit obviously will be figuring out who gets to stay friends with good times Garla I don't even know what i' do without her py little comments Fran is just a smile that's hiding Garla we'd like you to choose which of us you will remain friends with be brutally honest my answer is this I choose Kathy nothing against you Kira you're cool too but me and Kathy finish each other's sentences I'm devastated at least now the hardest part is over everything will be okay from you Garla I almost believe it believe it it's true and I guess custody wise maybe Ethan and the baby will go with you and carry with me sure something just happened what look at the time golden email what does that mean if you send an email at 11:11 that's a golden email that means you're done with work for the day I I've never heard of that they're super rare really yeah cuz emails happen kind of a lot no they are and you can't do them on purpose huh I have to call my boss you're going to call your boss hey Judith um I just sent I can't believe I'm saying this a golden email are you serious I'm serious congrats wow yeah I'm as surprised as you are listen you should get some rest maybe check out the contor evidently my roommate just tried to send a golden email on purpose oh no does that mean she's going to be killed no this is her first defense not her second L what are you going to do today oh she get to I guess I'm going to go to the fair can't believe we're going to a dinner party with a lot of Myers she's written so many of my favorite books countless well she's only written three books books three is countless remember the plan play it cool don't leap into her arms unless it's no there's no no yeah we're just going to treat her like a regular nothing special party guest hi hi I want you to know that you couldn't pay me to shake your hand okay excuse me and I wouldn't shake your hand even if I get three wishes out of it is this maybe good how I would speak to a regular party guest okay then yeah proceed you make me feel like I'm sick I don't understand what's happening okay and then I'll back up I'll start with what my wishes would be let's start with who you are and your name your first name okay actually can't think of it just one of those moments why don't you let me take it from here hi my name is what the hell you also don't know what I do know is I wouldn't shake your hand for three wishes okay I'm going to check this up to some dare or prank I don't understand and go to bed don't get to the party we brought you this what is this the invite said bring a bottle of wine or beer what invite for the dinner party this is the wrong house oh my God this is the wrong house is your name Elana Myers mine no yeah I guess I've never actually seen a picture of her but Lana Myers has written countless favorites of mine she's only written three books the person you guys hate is the author Alana Myers we love her we were playing at cool this explains why she isn't wearing like a stylish outfit I'm sorry who shows up to a dinner party with one beer the invitation said I have things to do I'm I'm going to go inside okay yeah I get it good night I really had no idea what you was saying the real lot of Myers will love our one pack and hostile approach it's weird that we can't remember our names though right I'm not really worried about it what are we all like doing tonight yeah is there a plan there's this bar right down the street that has a pinball oh that's cute Cole mentioned that those guys we're going to do karaoke I don't know what our energy level is I'd maybe do karaoke not to be L but I'll be down for a chill night just like watching a movie and getting snacks staying in could be cool or doing something manageable like going somewhere like right down the street oh Lena also has a show tonight has anyone talked to her yeah I don't think this one is like expected attendance awesome I think the Wednesday one's the one she wants friends at then karaoke yeah pin karaoke sounds fun cuz it's not just like going to a bar it's like a bar with a Twist I could maybe rally for karaoke you could sing time after time with me fine I'm in cool okay I'll text Cole and say we're down well wait um should we first take a vote and see which idea people are liking oh sorry I I just thought we were all leaning towards cuz I think actually if I had to pick and it's tough there a lot of good ideas I think I might actually pick pinball karaoke is maybe better than pinball in terms of a big group no it's actually super common misconception about pinball is that just for one person four friends can play on a single machine she just wonder if it's not the vibe for tonight sorry H yeah I would love to go sometime no why why are you apologizing to me I don't have a dog in this race I was just explaining for those who might not know that we all vote we're coming from an informed Place me and Hal I think we've all said how we're feeling and when we vote I'm sure those feelings will be reflected Bessa what's your favorite standard beer me fave beer um I like blue moons take can make you one of those ice cold okay but Tina what's your drink of choice um I like wine they red they white they even have some of the in between ones any bar has those things Sam Sam what kind of Beverage really hit the spot for you right now gen tonics they don't have that and then I guess beer great they have tons of it you know what let's get this over with I vote karaoke I vote pinball I think I vote pinball I think I vote pinball too no it's Sor right they have my second favorite drink it's right down the street well well well one said we didn't need a vote we'll lost the vote sorry Tess I don't care rides on me except you Tess my car only seats three people what kind of car seats three people one with a lot of boxes in it tough break test your life's about to get just a little bit easier I'm excited this is going to be my first microwave not abandoned by a previous tenant before we bring out your unit I just really quick um I'm going to go through my list do you want with the popcorn feature um most people do but I like to check cuz you know some people hate popcorn sure yeah I like popcorn great um and do you want the 2-year warranty should I it's an extra $3 you probably won't need it but I personally think it's good to have okay yeah I guess I'll do that all right great um that brings your total to 2200 I'm going to go grab your microwave and then I'll be right back what cuz this is the floor model so I'm going to go grab yours um we are cash only but there's an ATM downstairs should not be $2,000 the microwave we've been looking at is $150 oh um let me take a look okay on my end it's looking like most of the price increase is actually coming from that popcorn add-on you wanted it costs an additional $2,000 to get one that does popcorn well the add-on is actually it's a separate unit separate unit what does that mean it's a popcorn machine on a very mobile platform with these big red wooden Wheels the popcorn add-on is a popcorn cart like carnivals have yeah I'm sorry if it wasn't clear and you thought it was just going to be a bag of popcorn or something we are an appliance store after all obviously I thought it was a button on the microwave I'm buying I can cancel the add-on if you'd like yeah just the microwave please very well done I'm just why would you guys think people would want that most of our customers do ma'am most people buying a $100 microwave want to tack on an industrial popcorn machine again I've canceled the add-on ma'am I heard you let them clear I feel like most microwaves have a popcorn button anyway to encourage people to get the complete package our microwaves have a feature where they do a bad job if they can sense that it's popcorn being made okay I would love to speak to a supervisor I'm second guessing the microwave part now absolutely and I would trust that instinct ma'am this microwave is a piece of crap why are you don't you work on commission I don't work here ma'am I just coming to help sometimes can we get a supervisor on ilj Ma this is your last warning stop trying to sell your popcorn card to customers she's just joking attention shoppers we accept credit and debit we are not cash only I told you about our ovens sales associate mentions a cash only popcorn addon notify a supervisor don't listen to that I what's our evening plan um do you want to order in and watch a movie or something we did that last night and most nights yeah yeah but that's cuz it's perfect there's nothing better in the world I guess we're not in a R are we what uh I don't think so do do you feel like we are no I'm going to put in a takeout order from table grill okay what are you doing oh nothing really what think I have just what the doctor ordered meaning how do the little trip sound oh I would go on a trip your partner in crime just booked us two one-way tickets to London this weekend no refunds this weekend's a little tricky for me to non-refundable tickets oneway tickets okay why why one way we wouldn't be moving there right no just like a you know full steam ahead like a symbolic cuz it's much cheaper to buy the return flights yeah but what this is like who knows when we'll be back okay I have work so for any trip we went on they would have to do when I'd be back right right I also don't have a passport oh you don't no and it takes like a month right feel a little silly about getting these tickets just trying to get us I don't want us to be in a r we're not I shouldn't have said that I just meant that it would be fun to go bowling or go to a concert maybe if you call the airline right away and explain you could get a partial refund the option I selected made it very very clear that I can't do that gotcha do you do you want to go bowling tonight not really Damon wants one of us to pick him up from the airport okay there's only one way to settle this why don't you deal those cards out sometimes poker is the only way to sell things to tell you something which is that I don't play poker huh I guess I don't either if I if I really think about it I know like the rhythm of it poker is one of those things that you can under you can get it without knowing it in my head I'm always like of course I play but I don't it's just I I know what it looks like okay well let's just try to play a game and we'll see how far we get okay how many cards do you have eight it's a good hand do you have any fives I don't think I have to tell you that I was trying to Bluff okay now let's make things a little interesting whoever loses has to sleep on the toilet tonight oh what we already have a bet that's why we're doing this oh right the airport thing yeah what do we do now let's just trade fives I don't have any fives interesting hey you bluffed me I bluffed you I think you should have to take some of my chips for that is it time to time to show I have 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 and they're all clovers I have 2 4 6 79 which is the address of the place we lived in together last year which one is higher I don't know [Music] hey yes um I'm in the car now I'm going to be there soon is that Damon does he want us to her yet um no that's actually my mom my sister's getting married like right now oh no yeah that's not it's not good okay so I'll pick Damon up yeah you take airport I'll sleep on the toilet later you don't have to sleep on the toilet it's the least I can do thanks for doing this on such short notice of course not a problem I've been putting off seeing an optometrist for forever oh I got to pause you there though um an optometrist is something a little different oh it is in iare we have what we call the three O's an optometrist has a doctorate but isn't an MD and they do like consultations and stuff and opthalmologist is an MD and they who you go to for surgical treatments and then optician area of expertise is like the technical like fixing eyeglasses contacts Etc which one are you I'm something called an eyeball consultant and that's not one of those exactly so how can I help you today um my vision's just been a little shaky lately so I was thinking can probably be good for me to come in and take one of those ey test chart things yes um that's a great idea let me get that set up you're making a chart all right what letter is this e anything unusual about it it's red it's backwards I don't think it is isn't it huh guess you're right wow it's funny how you need the muscle memory when it's not next to another letter well regardless it's clear to me that you need glasses oh okay the next step is picking out a pair so we're just going to put you under for that you're going to put me under anesthesia to pick out a pair of glasses yeah we've had a lot of issues with clients kind of wriggling around so this is just a lot easier I guess you're the expert oh actually remember it's Opticians that are experts what are the qualifications for what you are we like to joke that the only qualification for being an eyeball consultant is being able to see huh okay let's get you knocked out hi um I'm calling about an order I placed last week yes how can I help you the bottle and the ship arrived in separate packages okay as opposed to as opposed to the ship being inside of the bottle um okay how would we fit a ship inside of a bottle what cuz the neck is too small like how do we get in there you built it like with tweezers like in tiny pieces that sounds extremely difficult your store is called ship in a bottle this is your whole thing no no no the store is called ship in a bottle how's that different short for and the apostrophe is on the on the right your store is called ship and a bottle yes okay does that clear things up no why would you sell those things together if it's not going to be part of the same display I don't know why does do any adult buy a toy ship loneliness boredom find it really hard to believe I'm the first person who's been confused by this what about like a bowl like if you want to put the ship in something I feel like a bowl would be a much easier shape is there someone else I can talk to sure yeah Mara come here yeah what's up just one second um this woman is angry because she thought the ship would be inside of the bottle like inside the bottle yeah how would that work like how would you get it in there she says with tweezers like in tiny pieces is that possible I she says it is if it is that would be a really cool thing for us to look into I know I'm like it's kind of out there but it could also be the perfect thing for us to try out we already have all the stuff that's the thing we have all the stuff okay um put her on hold and then I'll get my computer and we can do some research about this cool how do I do that just the red button I think the red button is off no it's not give it to me watch this I've never slowed down after hitting an animal and I've hit um a lot of rabbits and squirrels couple deer and a tiny horrible part of me wonders like if it were a human would I do anything different never have I ever supposed to be about like travel or dating or oh well I've never done those things either okay for starters I'm going to delete this recording what no don't delete it it could be good to have I've never slowed down after hitting an animal okay fine fine fine fine fine fine just try another one okay speak from the heart you ready yeah three two one never have I ever been to Montana but I've always wanted to stately purple mountains two Hawks soaring over a sea of Ponderosa Pines one unlucky Tire CH and skunk at the side of a road that stretches all the way to the Horizon I hope you like road trips was that good better I mean you mentioned road kill again well it was part of the image be my only I think it's usable yeah I yeah I think it's usable how do I stop this one says I'm thankful for my wonderful wife Sarah a John you can't put your wife's name on the card and that soon our family will be getting a little bit bigger I'm feeling ready to have this baby already I'm thankful that I got here in one piece after a woman absolutely blasted through a stop sign on my waake a call when that happened that happened to us the other day too did you write that one me they're Anonymous John luckily I was able to avoid disaster thanks to my trusty courage as well as a precise and well-timed the letters are kind of small maneuver W Riley that sounds intense glad you're John now everyone knows that one was mine it luckily she was not going that fast I would say 10 or 15 mph we're glad you're okay I'm going pick up I'm thankful that the woman wasn't going that fast 10 or 15 if I had to guess looks like I took the words right out of my own mouth how many of these did you write and how are they being she was in this super ugly Range Rover too picked an order I'm thankful that my car doesn't look like that my first thought was ah she's going to hit me my second thought was that's a really ugly Range Rover I did think it was kind of weird that the bowl was full of slips um when there only four of us maybe I'm just thankful for a lot of things okay but these all just seem to be details from the stop sign anecdote the thing about American cars is that people want to feel comparably safe on the road really what so people buy bigger and bigger cars I get out on the freeway I'm like what are these are all tanks the point of that becoming just like small top this one just say free space and you can have that one for free I think the one that I wrote is probably going to get lost um in the shuffle but I do want to say I'm I'm really thankful for all of you hey Sarah could you pass me the mashed potatoes yeah um I mean in a kitchen yeah it's in a whole different room it's bringing not passing um I'll go bring them to the table okay but she's she's pregnant she's not dying hey man it's okay should we read a few more of the Gratitude slips okay ol on in a sec welcome oliv Shephard whose new album for help he songs like coming out as 19 and the adults in my life tricked me thank you for that introduction gr tberg and might I say I loved Little Women when most people hear water they think of swimming pools but water is also the core ingredient and Nature's crazy old swimming pool known as the sea hit it boys somewhere let's keep the short though be the sea somewhere waiting for me cut thanks boys but let's get to business in the last year over 1 billion trees worth of paper have been thrown out in the us alone olivan I'm sorry you know what hey what are you doing I want to speak from the heart it's ironic that in order to speak from the heart I must tear up the very trees I hope to one day save okay okay you don't have to keep points been made change happens when we work together through your combined efforts in ous contributions you all have raised over $50,000 towards booking me for this event yeah who here cares about the Earth we're all here today not just to talk about climate change we're here to demand climate change oh no the climate is changing if you believe in science you know that's a fact but is it changing fast enough yes it Olan no do you hear me we want climate when do we want it hit it boys somewhere beyond the sea so you're kind of fun and you have a boyfriend and he's like kind of a goof um I I don't have a boyfriend no yeah so you're a friend of girl girls who wear red and you have a boyfriend he said such a goof no I don't oh yeah for sure we'll come back to that um what about like like little videos of people dancing uh yeah I like those I like to watch those what about like what about like um a compilation video of like children's toys like being set on fire and melting what no no okay um dogs yeah I like dogs cool dog toys being like set on fire and melted what yeah say boyfriend goof hey I like your shirt thank you for saying that yeah it's it's great no it means a lot it's honest and I like that I don't like to mess around I don't like to play games hey guys what's up oh hey hey I got to run it's just saying hi I don't really trust her my name is Jane and I think that I'm going to be the most drunk because goose and I invented this game called Never Never shant I will I won't I shall I which is like never have I ever but future okay okay guys I'm doing a second one because goose and may are taking a really long time at their um two person solitire game but I do still think that I'm the drunkest the truth is that I am sober and Jane is the drunkest but she's a very smart drunk and a very silly drunk I love you Jane I'm goose and I I personally think that I'm the drunkest because during never shant I will I won't I shall I I couldn't really think of any scenarios um and during two person soltire I was having a tough time counting and and that usually I think would indicate that um I'm intoxicated but Jane is also pretty drunk to be fair the person sending you this hopes you are snug as a bug and then you would get their roommates are playing a twers version of Solitaire right now so yeah oh okay you're turning 24 and you're fantastic at soccer you're red you could go pro if you wanted to shut up but you don't because you're a senior in high school and I'm going to so I think a lot of people think of art as this really precise thing and today I just want to show you guys that that really isn't true um I'm just using you know a few colored pencils that I had lying around in my house and I'm not being particularly precise with my lines I'm actually just kind of going for it and I don't really know what I'm drawing I guess I'll figure it out as I as I go um but I'm just having fun so even though each individual stroke is very simple um very easy to do when we zoom out and look at the finished product we see wait that sucks Jane hey hi do you remember me yeah it's it's been to see you um do you remember me really mhm I think your name is Storm no that's impossible it's been a minute how how are things going yeah um pretty well pretty well what that's not true storm I hatte it here I want to move to New York and I want to go to the Beach and I wanted to feel my toes in the sand and nothing my mother says will stop me at all listen I know I'm just a pointy jumpy little bird boy but I really love you and all I want is to give you my love for like a couple weeks I'm going to be someone Mom what are you talking about it's the 50s newspapers can't be women say I want to come to the Dress store I'm busy what are you thinking about me no I'm thinking about newspaper the person sending you this loves you very much also they're pretty cold they miscalculated layer-wise what to wear outside and the third thing they wanted to tell you is that they know your birthday is coming up this week your 19th birthday and they wanted to wish you an hbd you're for sure going to make the soft team this year Earth that crazy Blue Marble that we all know and love home to everyone in this room and more what the Earth lacks in size and makes up for and charm and spnk Neptune on the other hand is this planet this next planet is not a planet at all the Sun is hot to the touch and it's thousands this is Venus it's going to be hard to come back from Venus isn't our son but it is a son Jane do you want to let Josh take over maybe yeah Josh will'll take it from here a tree or man's best friend is made up out of is made out of only one cell no which is what distinguishes it from an animal okay we'll come back to this squirrels scale a tree's Mighty bark to get to the acorns above other animals that do this next slide other animals that do this water and nutrients this is a lemon the lemon this is the sun the sun is important to trees because it rains on them I can't be right Jan do you want to see the rest of this one out yeah the person sending you this loafs you very much and also they wrote you the following poem your eyes are like the two two of the tallest trees in the world not in that they're pointy but in that they are greenish Brown [Music] okay well Happy Valentine's Day I'm Gail and I am not confident in my ability to prepare a meal no contestants will have to incorporate these ingredients yeah I'm just going to make eggs is that your phone yeah she has her phone that's not oh so I'm supposed to have the recipe for Eggs memorized um before the judging starts don't I'm going to G I'll switched our plates um I made the risoto Y that true no I made uh the risoto you know we watched you guys Barb made the eggs she's lying anly Barb not to toot my own horn but the eggs came out really good you mean not to toot Barb's horn what the person sending you this thinks are easy on the eyes and then some your name is John son 10 and they think it was very brave of you to decide to not work for the family business and pursue your dream of being a dancer Happy Valentine's Day to say the least the person saying you this thinks that you're the cat's pajamas also and no offense here they're pretty sure that like them you have very little going on on the 14th so if you would like to be Valentine's Day buddies and watch a movie or something let them know something unromantic such as food ink or the two [Music] popes so let them know the person sending you this wants a divorce the person sending you this doesn't really want a divorce but imagine if they did and this was how they told you that would be nuts sorry if this was weird water we can't live with it and we can't live without it from floating our boats to filling our ice trees water or h2o is all around us the snowflake is one of water's most deadly forms all snowflakes are identical they are famously not identical and this is because they have the same DNA J what next slide J I wrote this whole thing down for you you just had to read it yeah I want to return to the snowflake thing oh I know this is the water cycle this part I got okay water gets heavier condensation and then it falls it [Music] do you guys know what transpiration is Dan I'm going to ask you to set the rest of this one out I understand off off off your head oh my God who are you r r to the Flor who are you oh I'm Jane what are you doing here I'm Emma's friend oh okay well this is obviously not her room you know surprised usually Emma is the messy one no offense I'm sorry how do you know her Emma yeah she's not here right now I was just wondering if maybe um you wanted to hang out is that that's my bread yeah very good little still okay kindergarteners listening yours on go ahead and show me a circle if you like flipping the bird at the camera um teacher Mason is doing one finger instead of a circle okay Mason can you stop flipping a bird mean is this right no I think it's the middle one it means um whoa okay um I'm going to go ahead and mute my Mason for a second U Mason is messaging me poop and he says that I'm poop yeah that's because he's being a little you know Wonder time not so bad when you got a beautiful dress glass of wine some jazz music in the background it's a gold one out there but it's not the snow that gets you down it's the humidity I like my wine piping hot that's pretty hot but let's give her a try nonetheless all right the person sending this to you thinks you are cute as a button also you've been married for several years and have two beautiful little monsters together here's to many more years and two more beautiful little monsters they're kidding no more kids please okay well Happy Valentine's Day big money big money big money I I don't know what to say hey hello hey Mom it's me again oh hey honey what's up yeah um I actually have some pretty good news oh that's great job related better hi sharks in winter time we're all wearing socks to keep our feet nice and warm but what if there was such a sock that could go on your hand as well as your foot you said you're in 4,000 locations you know I did say that and to be totally transparent I was lying but enough about that introducing hand sock it's made out of sock material but the key difference is where it goes on your body what I was hoping you would say was that the glove was simply sorry to interrupt but what the is a glove okay this is put a finger down my girlfriend addition put a finger down if you love your boyfriend Ryan put a finger down if you think that Ryan has big muscles put a finger down if you want us to spend the rest of our lives together and will accept this proposal of marriage is this really how you're asking me put a finger down if you like dogs more than cats is this a joke hey babe have you watched my Tik Tok talk yet put a finger down if you get cranky when you're tired I'm watching it now did you get to the part yet put a finger down if you hate olives what do you think do you I don't know Ryan okay so swim swim away from me when I say the color that's your favorite color Okay red blue blue is that cuz of water was that a stupid question sorry fish don't love water people people don't love of air hello hey there little guy what's up with you swimming that's cool me I'm just sort of here my housemates went to get groceries boo I know you can talk The person sending you this would like to throw a two-person party of the year in other words they would like to hang out here are some possible themes for your two person party of the year the person sending this is hitting the sack their snug is a bug and hope that you are as well also it's their birthday this weekend don't forget and start preparing your compliments now here's some ideas um Jake I think there's someone waiting to ask a question but let me know about the babysitting um Miss harson yes to ask you about my test in espol but this is a math class yeah all grades for that one are final I just like to say that up front cool cool cool cool cool was that your question no yeah yeah that was it okay well I'm going to go bye mom not I meant Mrs harson bye bye um I love you and you are my mom okay blind do at this put a finger down if you've ever peed in the shower now put a finger down if you ever PED in the shower put a finger down if you're Alex wind Gate's only roommate put a finger down if you're one of two people to use that shower put a finger down if you understand why Alex would be skeptical when you say you did not a shower who for sending this to you things to the best and also it's your birthday today so HB freaking D to you you're turning 25 and though you can't swim your friend is confident that you this is the year that you will learn to swim I think pickles are disgusting ah so you disgusting I'm just F maybe you can trusting I'm [Music] you know what's crazy is that we all start in this world as babies the person sending this to you loves you very much more urgently the toilet is doing the thing again and they need you to come home as soon as possible keeping your amazing self and don't forget what they said about the toilet the person who's sending you this thinks you're the best and also they need you to give them a ride to the airport this Thursday at at 1:45 p.m. time we SP together they will not chip in for gas