Browse Transcripts
Sean Lock Hates One Thing About David Walliams | Keep It Light | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
But anything sets me off just anything i just see those david wams books oh i hate them know those kids books is oh i got on strike in my house i refused to read them to my kids so i'm not reading it i'm not my wife says it's because i'm a bitter twisted jealous pathetic husk of a man who's lost all... Read more
5 Fascinating Facts About Michael Keaton's Film Career!
Category: People & Blogs
Stop what you're doing do you know these five crazy facts about michael keaton's career all right movie buffs let's dive in fact one did you know michael keaton's real name is michael douglas he changed it to avoid confusion with the other famous michael douglas the fact twoo before becoming an a-list... Read more
Taylor Tomlinson Talks Save Me Comedy Tour and Gets Jimmy to Sign a Fever Pitch DVD | Tonight Show
Category: Comedy
-welcome back! -hi. -here's your tour right there. come on. that's a big deal. -thank you. thank you so much. -taylor, you came on the show and did stand-up here. it was one of your first appearances. i was so happy and lucky to have you. i'm, like, the biggest fan of yours. -thank you so much. yeah,... Read more
Taylor Tomlinson Doesn’t Think of Herself as the “Queen of Late-Night”
Category: Entertainment
So you're the queen of late night because you're the only one you're the only female light you're the only one there to be queen by default you are the queen of late night the real question is why aren't there more women in late night yeah i agree it was interesting because i was surprised that so much... Read more
Taylor Tomlinson Started Doing Stand-Up at 16
Category: Entertainment
You're a standup by trade right you would say that so how old were you when you started doing standup 16 and what was your first gig oh i was doing churches oh yeah i was that's the only place i was allowed to perform and what kind of jokes do you tell at a church you know i think i told a lot of jokes... Read more
Chick Comedy's College Special Feat: Taylor Tomlinson, Esther Ku & More | Chick Comedy
Category: Comedy
Traci stumf - my own college i didn't go to college yeah yeah thank you you know i'm okay with the fact that i didn't go to college it's the entire world that is not okay with the fact that i did not go to college and when you don't go to college you notice stuff about life you know like what i've noticed... Read more
There Is Nothing Dumber Than A Man At A Grocery Store. Barry Laminack
Category: Comedy
I'm married. i love being married. thank you, yeah. it's great, man. my wife wrote that part of the joke. it's-- (audience laughing) yeah, i'm married, man. i'm in an interracial relationship. (audience laughing) i'm white, she's hispanic. a lot of people don't count that. if there's not a black person... Read more
Podcaster Bobbi Althoff Announces Live Comedy Show at The Wiltern ‘We Hope This Is the Start of Som
Category: Entertainment
[music] [applause] [music] bobby althof is the latest podcaster to bring her show to the stage on october 10th the comedian and podcast host will take her the really good podcast to los angeles's famed wilon joined by co-host suana for a night of comedy and one surprise musical guest tickets will officially... Read more
I Don't Roast, I Talk - BT Kingsley Crowd Work Compilation - Chocolate Sundaes Standup Comedy
Category: Comedy
You look uncomfortable like oh [ __ ] he's going to talk about my ears no i'm not i'mma talk about your lazy eye what's popping he looking at you and at them at the same time you sat in the front with these mother boy boy got the mil on them don't it woo correct the vision get it for your kids you ain't... Read more
I took a photo of POTUS and it’s up for sale. #joelycett #joebiden
Category: Entertainment
Hello i'm in chicago i'm not here for the democratic convention i'm here filming a documentary about all the places in the world called birmingham we're in birmingham iowa tomorrow and i uh i was very close to this guy and this woman basically i went for a little w and they drove past me and gave me... Read more
NFL Dad Jokes - Why Jets Football Fans Are Not the Smartest - Jokes
Category: Comedy
Two nfl jets football players were walking through the woods one of them says dude look a dead bird and the other one looks up and says where Read more
Adam Sandler: Love You (Clip) | Trailer in English | Netflix
Category: Film & Animation
My father used to always go for the belt. he'd be like, "you're going to get the belt." **** i don't do that with my kids just 'cause i wear sweatpants. i'm like, "you're going to get the tassels." [laughter] "daddy gonna get… [chuckles] daddy gonna get you." Read more
Adam Hills On America | Happyism | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
[applause] and look i feel bad dissing are there american people here there's a couple over there going woo just live the stereotype uh mean i i love you guys i just think we we look up to you a little bit too much do you know what mean we try to impress you too much and look i love you because you're... Read more
Adam Hills Regrets THAT Megan Fox Joke | Happyism | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
Remember that you you know that american tv show i was telling you about i made the biggest dick of myself on that show it was called chelsea lately now some of you all know this show it's it's and i don't want to diss the show cuz i was so excited to be on it but chelsea handler is a late night american... Read more
Jason Manford's Hilarious Michael Mcintyre Impression | First World Problems | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
It's a loads of things will'll just do your edit daily it's weird i mean you know if you ever hear me moaning about this job please just punch me in the face like i do i i love this job i mean i'm lazy like i said i'm not you know i don't really leave this little bit i don't know why they bother lighting... Read more
Jason Manford Reads Out Hilarious Messages From The Crowd | First World Problems | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
So now before the show uh i ask you guys to write down your own first world problems and uh i've got them here uh obviously i can't read them all out i've had to forward to them and onto the police uh there some proper nutters in this room okay let's have a little look through some of these if you hear... Read more
Jason Manford Tells A Joke, 147 People Complain | First World Problems | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
I i once told a joke on the telly that got 147 complaints and i'll be honest with you i'm still not sorry and i was this was what jimmy car feels like every day about three and a half years ago in a huge news story hit the uk when an old woman put a cat in a bin do you remember this story and the country... Read more
Jason Manford - FULL Comedy Roadshow Appearance | Jokes On Us
Category: Comedy
[music] thank you nice one good he nice one thank you how are you michael mcy everyone how good the what a legend the apollo look at this is anyone else thinking they've scrubbed it up quite nice haven't they it's nice now it's on the telly when we usually e it's all right [ __ ] all is it but look... Read more
Jason Manford On The Worst Thing That Could Happen, Ever | First World Problems | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
The ultimate first world problem i think is this right just imagine this picture this scene you've all been there you've had a long day at work and you get to the end of the day so tired so tired you get home and maybe you make to like you go for a drink you're like oh i don't really want to but you... Read more
Jason Manford's Mum Does What?! | First World Problems | Universal Comedy
Category: Comedy
My parents have been together 35 years now and uh they got together very young actually my mom was well my mom was young my mom was 16 and my dad was 24 there was an eight 8ye age gap and now my mom's got to an age where she's starting to lie about her age she's starting to take two or three years off... Read more