Christina Applegate | Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

welcome welcome welcome to armchair expert I'm buck Minister and I'm joined by Lily Pad Buck Minister yeah that's the street that Ken Kennedy grew up on you know the famous story where he got pulled over as a 16 in his Mustang and the cop was being very aggressive to him he came up to the window and he license and registration he looks at his license he goes do you have any idea why I stopped you this evening Mr Buck Minister he read no he read yes he read the street yes he the street Mr Minister oh my God that's great that's so good today we have Christina Applegate Christina Applegate is a beloved actor that I've been loving since I was a child and she was a child she is an icon um Married with Children of course the sweetest thing Anchorman she's [ __ ] holds her own against all the heavyweights it's impressive I got to know her personally on bad mom's and then of course dead to me was so fantastic and she has a podcast out right now with Jamie ly seagler called Messi M SS y capital S on that which we get into we do um so check out Messi we should say this is the third field trip in like three weeks in three weeks we basically have a mobile operation now I know it's been kind of fun I I'm resistant to it but I I like getting into a different environment we're not trading in the Attic or anything but it was it was good to get out yes so from Christina's bedroom please enjoy Christina Applegate he in our chair [Music] [Music] we will make sure everything's quiet for you guys not worri we're in a construction site if you had come to my house there's a bobcat right now in front of the house going back and forth back and forth when we just recording you can hear her my daughter will stop playing piano in a moment tell her to take her time beautiful all the animals will be locked up um housekeepers will be fired and everything's going to be fine sti's going to have to stop I feel bad but she's going to have to stop playing col her how old is she 13 wow she's so good she taught herself how to play piano in the last month it freaks me out that's crazy yeah she just started playing piano a month ago by herself no oh my God yeah she YouTubes it no and goes down and just starts playing songs wow wow this kind of perhaps settles an argument we're having in the household Christ of course would I need to come up to I can't hear we can't hear a goddamn thing Rob oh boy all right then the [ __ ] rob you talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk how long are you going to say talk for that's the most until Rob oh okay that's me Rob that's me go I just spit all over your mic don't worry okay now who do you need talk talk talk talk okay sounds good to me yeah okay [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] fu [ __ ] [ __ ] Dynamite [ __ ] [ __ ] talk [ __ ] talk [ __ ] [ __ ] talking talk the argument in our house right now it's not an argument of course it's very important to her that they learn instruments and we make appointments and we take them and they don't practice and they don't want to do it and I'm kind of of the opinion like people who play instruments you couldn't have kept them from playing those instruments these kids we knew growing up they were in their [ __ ] room with a guitar for 12 hours and your daughter she's just doing it right yeah so I've lived through this because I was that mom when she was younger she was in dance I was a dancer so that was the most important thing to me in the entire world was that she was a dancer I was like you are going to dance and soccer piano singing all the things this poor kid got so burnt out and then hated all of it yeah yeah and then all of a sudden she didn't want to do nothing so I just said okay you're not going to do anything she actually was really good at dance didn't want to do it she was terrible at soccer not going to be me a ham not going to happen I was like we're good with that piano she didn't want anything to do with it I actually would take the lessons the teacher would come and then she would just like this is exactly what Christ would [ __ ] off and then I'd be like no I'm learning box and just recently she taught herself how to play piano she's taking cello lessons once a week she's in the orchestra at her school instigated by her though right that's the difference I had to take the talons out recently with school workor and stuff like that too I was told by other moms they're like like stop it let her fail because she's 13 and I was like I can't do that I can't let her fail you'll have failed right if she fails well yes that ego of let's be perfect so now yeah she goes down basically every single night and plays piano for an hour or two and teaches herself s songs no we just walked in and my guess would be she's like year four of lessons every day I thought no she's never had a piano lesson except for the ones you forced on her at five right exactly now she's 13 but now she goes down she's like like she's playing all this stuff and I'm like what is happening it's really lovely yeah it's sounded like when the piano you just put it on a setting and it just plays on its own oh right right like an automatic piano oh she sounded like a fake piano that's awesome that's the ultimate compliment you sound like a fake piano I think I'm going to tell her that you guys said that I think she's going to be really and she loves it so much because it's the one thing that she doesn't have a lesson for right like cello is a lesson were you somebody that liked being instructed or did you like figuring things out on your own I have like a nickname from my last job which is called No I know I know I know I know I know no I know I know I know I know I know don't even you don't even need to tell me I know which has annoyed mostly the male directors that I've work with but my female for dead to me they got me I would make fun of myself and I'm like I'm sorry they couldn't even get across the entire set and I was like I know I know I know I know I know I know I know got it checked in I'm super similar that way I hate receiving instruction anything I know how to do I kind of just figured out other than taking classes at the Groundlings they did teach me all the rules but my own vanity cuz I'm younger brother maybe do you have siblings I have half siblings and we were not raised together I already knew this let's just say that you knew you knew you knew you knew you knew well just like I'm embarrassed I just asked I know I know I know I know I just did it real time no house living or growing up together and we text yes but I love them with all my heart I have a new nephew and he's so cute he's so Applegate it's like Applegate knows but then he has this amazing chin dimp pimple so cute we're not fully blood my brother and sister and I dad had a second family basically right that we didn't know about oh you didn't know about no that was a joke would have been so juicy I know no my dad left when I was 3 months old my mom and dad separated and then he met my stepmother in Big Sir in a tree like at esselin or something at Ventana okay is that the same no no no what's the restaurant Ventana is the hotel and then there's like the restaurant thing it's kind of like a hippie spiritual she said she could feel something and she came down and there was this man and she said are you a Scorpio and he was like I am and so that was in 1971 they're still together yeah that's pretty impressive we're vearing off sorry that's the goal oh yeah we're all over the yeah no that's you should listen our podcast sorry our podcasts are not competing in any way although they both share the messiness messy yes but we're like messy it's not like Ms I mean we talk about the MS oh is that is that a slang for Ms oh my God seen our logo I did see that the S was huge and I didn't put it together okay well now okay Dum so stupid you kind of seem a little I need instruction [ __ ] words that I shouldn't say but that's kind of our Jam is that we don't have a plan okay I feel so stupid I didn't pick that up and I honestly thought it's subtle someone had a typo someone accidentally capitalize the S no that was my idea to put the Big M and the big S it's good it's me just like whatever I can blame you have so many issues I know I know yes Miracle I'm here myad issues Myan of setbacks oh I have to say something to you sorry I'm going to sidebar okay so I'm going to start to laugh so hard Kristen and I we did a movie together and and I love her and she's amazing and I love you but the first time we met you don't even know that we met okay excited it's such a good story okay I can't wait it's not long but I'm going to make it long cuz that's what I do I pontificate you tell the stories like christas where she's like I went to the grocery store yesterday you know where I went to elementary school right it just keeps going back and I try to hold it back I said to someone the other day that's a lot of answers to questions I didn't ask so let's break it back down to get to the point period dot okay so your beautiful wife was in hair at the Hollywood Bowl oh yes it rained which was weird it was not the night that I was there oh I did not know her yet we had not done bad moms together and my friend Rhett George was in the show and he was the only cast member who refused to take off his clothes which I love him for his Integrity but also I was like come on Rhett you know you've got a big schlong anyway let's see that big old sh so we were going backstage to see Rett and Kristen and you were in front of us and you were playing security guard and you literally shoved me oh into a wall wait a minute yes you shoved me into a wall you're like get back no get back oh my God there is no way I shoved a woman especially you me and my husband Martine I might have shoved your husband no you shoved both of us as if I was going to like try to get a piece of the cloth of her clothes he does get very protected but I'm like really dude we're going to see Rhett George oh I would have hated me get over yourself no one's trying to talk to her we were not pleased with you but I looked fondly on it and I laughed because you were really protect and that's kind of beautiful but you were like get back everybody it was like a as if she was Beyonce or something not to say that she's not Beyonce no she's not be I don't know people that need security Taylor Swift with the things but it was like the arms were going back and I was like [ __ ] that dude anyway I love you though well hold on though before we move on okay I'm of course having a hard time reconciling that story with my image of myself so just let's start there but secondly no no secondly I'm sorry truly it's okay I must have felt like a lot of people were trying to get her something and maybe I overreacted I laugh about it now you know of course in the moment you're like this is I would hate me no but there was a lot of people it was very crowdy I get tense when there's too many people her dressing room was to the left I believe and Rett George was to the right I was just trying to get to my friend Rett George I didn't know your wife that time I was just like I want to get to Rhett who did not take off his clothes that's all I want to do you need to get in there and tell him you should have taken off his clothes well I kind of love him for not cuz I saw butthole that night anus anus Majoris anus and we were really close we were like in a box and I was like should have bleach that groomed that was a big butthole in my face okay so what I know for sure is that I clearly didn't see it was you because obviously I'm an enormous fan of yours always have been and I feel like we've met before that cuz I think I came up to you and talked about Lou that's a fun subject we don't need to talk about it but it just so happens that I happened to know a dude from the program that had dated you forever he at one time was my sponsor he also proved to be crazy in many ways I'm sorry that I'm laughing that you were a sponsor so I thought we could bond like maybe not be a sponsor so when we met I was excited I thought we could bond over the notion that we had both been wooed by somebody and then perhaps maybe shouldn't have trusted the person so much and I remember that being our first conversation bringing up Lou I apologize for me thinking that was the first time I think it's just the time that stuck out if someone shoved me I would remember them for well I remember everyone that shoved me Martin and I were like we just got shoved like physically assaulted just now by Dak Shephard physically I'm you even knew it was me of course well you were with your wife I know who you guys are your pretty eyes well then how would you rank our experience while you guys were doing bad moms cuz I'm enamored by you I think I always was shining as bright as I could to get your affections oh honey your wife is golden I could thank her for a lot of things not only just being an exceptional human being a great actress but also what you guys did for our kids in the public we cannot thank you enough wow thank you I had a baby girl at that time you're a year and a half ahead of us yeah you guys had a baby when we did bad moms I think yeah we had both I was down there in New Orleans with two little tiny ones and I had my tiny one everybody was there ma had the baby and it was really sweet cuz it was a movie about moms and people always ask me where was your inspiration for your character and I was like pretty much everyone at preschool yeah yeah we're going there and I'm going to expose you that's what's happening and the funny thing is when stie ended up at her Elementary School I was on the board of it's so ironic and so gross like I gross myself out about this I was on the healthy eating wow committee and went to every room one year to talk about the foods that we were not allowed to have in the school and this was after the movie and I didn't make the connection that I was like that dick parent who was like you know at the birthday parties that we have here can you please not bring sugar I will provide vegan muffins and skewers with pineapples oh my God that's really funny want to throw up you're a unicorn in that you're actually from here it's kind of rare not even from here like within one mile radius of this house which we will not say where it is but I'm pretty sure people know yeah I've never lived outside of this neighborhood one M no way no never did you go to that little Elementary School no you did okay so your mother was an actress and a dancer and these things she was not a dancer okay that's okay your research well I blame Wikipedia and dad was a music producer he was an anr he found Billy Idol well not found Billy Idol Gen X was Gen X but then my dad was vice president of promotions at Casablanca so a lot of the people that came out was like Billy Idol Donna Summer and did you have the coolest record collection of any kid and I still have them [ __ ] no I still have them with the that says for promotion only they're in my garage oh I would love that CA Blanc had the very coolest icon it was like an Arabian landscape there was palm trees it was very cool I think it might be Morocco Casablanca yes well of course I just thought it was like Malibu but now you're blowing my mind okay I used to stare at those albums that my father had and just stare at that image it's a very me was president of promotions at Casablanca for years so you had unlimited tapes and cassettes and [ __ ] growing up at first it was albums but we're the same age at some point tapes were the thing right but my dad wasn't there anymore but Sadie and I were talking about tapes today and I said you know what a cassette tape is she goes oh my God yeah Mom I have a cassette type of belly eyelish oh she put out a cassette and she goes but I can't play it and I said you can cuz guess what your mother has a cassette player you know be gra to give her a Walkman oh my God I went down a rabbit hole two weeks ago thinking you know as a kid I really wanted this expensive Walkman with auto reverse but we afford one and I'm like you know what I finally have enough money I'm going to get one and heal that so I was just shopping for them they're so cool they are but then there's the thing with the tape then the thing comes out and then you've got to like it just gets ruined out the tape comes out and it's just a disaster it it my whole childhood was just a disaster yes writing a book about how bad that part of my childhood is the tape era yeah put a pen in itze back in you had to refurbish it yeah and if someone did like a what do they call them when you give someone that you love a thing mixtape mixtape you're [ __ ] oh yeah once that little guy goes out then you're like and that was your symbol of love that you're in love oh what a Time aren't you delighted with the arrow we grow up in mixtapes are we delighted by that I am I kind of like the Creature Comforts of not I can go on my thing and just play a song I mean obviously things have gotten easier and easier but we didn't know there wasn't anything easier we didn't know yeah the fact that there was Auto reverse it would automatically play the back side of the table without flipping it over that felt impossible like that's just saved me hours of my life so everything was getting better the whole ride but I think there is something still like we might have the last cute phase of 50s childhood where you had these Trinkets and these stupid things now everything's digital nothing's really happened the little dumb thing you look at changes but we had different mediums and stuff that we were going through I was talking to someone the other day and they're like you romanticize being Gen X and I'm like I don't think that's what's happening I think what we're trying to say to this generation now is your paper cut doesn't mean [ __ ] right yes it's kind of a little soft because when we go got a paper cut our parents were like yeah we're going to go to the bar have fun with that if they were even around to complain about the paper cut my mom was like working all day no one was there yeah I was walking home from my school at 8 in the rain literally I was that guy I walked a mile from school in the rain you know that thing that people say yeah I legitimately was walking home and if I didn't get molested by the weird rock stars up in the Canon right it was a good day yes sorry I know that's really Grim no no but also going to be in the also very 80s getting molested I was molested very 80s everyone I know in the ' 80s was molested so80s so 8s tell us that you're from the ' 80s without saying you're from the ' 80s it's really 70s for me I think that was when the prime yeah diddling aren't you so nostalgic for that time by the adult peeps yeah couldn't they find someone else okay that was fun you acted for the first time at 3 months old in commercial a baby yeah commercial and I think a soap I can tell you exactly the can you tell me cuz I really don't know yeah first was play Tex baby bottles at 3 months old oh yeah she spits up less that's what my mom said in the commercial she spits up less and it was my mom holding me and she was so beautiful oh that was your mom as well in the commerci show because you were on Days of Our Lives with your mom as well right same era same month I think same three-month old baby yeah I guess we can tell exactly what the time frame was you're were 3 months old and both and then by 10 you're in movies so I'm just curious mom obviously acted is it something that back to what we were saying about trying to get your kids to do something versus they just want to do it there's nothing you can do to stop them where are you at on that Spectrum when you were little I just had to and then once I started making money at 3 years old I started making a lot of money I was doing radio commercials for Kmart with Josh Richmond do you know Josh he used to walk with the Kan I totally know him he's friends with everybody him and Downey are best friends yeah yep oh [ __ ] wait you're going to love this you're going to love this it's Ed O'Neal calling me right now really funny you should answer it sorry I didn't turn my phone off that's okay we don't care I've never met him but I just watched his Finding Your Roots episode and I concluded we would be fast friends CU he was very violent when he was younger then he came here turned his whole life he probably sh some people yeah he and I talk almost every day right now yeah we do I'm so sorry I didn't turn my phone off but anyway fun po a little Eddy what were we talking about okay so I started doing these commercials with Josh Richmond who everyone knows and I love him to death from age three till I was seven we were called Mr and Mrs goof proof and it was when Kmart started doing the photo thing you know get your photos done here the first place that ever did it we got like Cleo Awards and stuff and I made a [ __ ] ton of money and my mom was like Coolio I don't have to work anymore did you know that you were making a lot of money I was three okay 3 to 7 I made so much money that my mom bought a house as an investment which we never lived in but then I ended up living in it when I was 17 I moved out when I was 17 into a house you had owned since you were three three seven no we bought it when I was seven I lived there for 3 years and it's behind the country store in Laurel Canyon so this is precan account or post post there was money small percentage it's not my me Mom I love you I was the only one making money you were the primary bread winner yes and have and yeah yeah also in the book do you have a moment that you remember it's switching to something that you very much wanted to do I mean of course for me I really want to know that when you were unmarried with children you actually wanted to and were excited maybe not okay so my brain's going through a lot of visuals I always had to do it and then when I was 13 I said to her I don't want to do this anymore I want to hang out with my friends I want to make bad decisions I want to do all the things and she goes okay I'll call your agent and say no and at that time my head was shaved you were making some statements oh I had eyeliner that had crosses on it on the side like I was that guy we were both punk rock can smoking cigarettes listening to The Cure freaking out this m yeah psychedelic F yes Susy and the Benes yeah love love good I would have flirted with you we would have had sexy it was all shaved and then you know like a little bit of hair it was weird there's footage of it in pictures somewhere it's in the book it's in the book so she goes I'm going to call right now and I went upstairs a 750t row house that's where I grew up very tiny I'm sorry New York that as a mansion sure sure sure freaking we don't have to qualify that that's a lot of room for a 13year old it was a house you had to walk through bedrooms to get to other bedrooms and I got really panicked and I came downstairs within like 20 minutes and I was like don't call her I'm good and from that day forward at 13 years old I have not stopped working until becoming disabled honestly go on my MD that's what I call it the MD that's what everyone's calling it MD yeah IMDb for anyone who doesn't doesn't that isolate the whole mentality of this [ __ ] business right there is like you don't want to do it the second you do it and it occurs to you you might not ever get invited back you're immed like oh no but it wasn't about being invited back that was home that was your identity and it's been and that's what I'm dealing with now taking that out of my life and probably not being able to work again going who am I right who the [ __ ] am I thank God you had a child right oh my God I be she's my get up in the morning and she's my go to sleep with hope that I get up in the morning and now I'm like what am I supposed to do I've grown up on a set and that sounds creepy it sounds really child actory but it's not about that it's about the camaraderie and growing up and being professional and loving people and enjoying humans well it feels good to be good at a job any given job when you're good at it you get to go to a place and people trusted you and you deliver that's a very rewarding esteem building experience I was not good I was terrible go watch this crap terrible no no that is not true I didn't know comedy I thought comedy was for douchebags I was such a serious little 13-year-old I was like no I have to do Dr and then I made a career doing this oh that's my dog barking that's okay that's one of two dogs that you have they greeted us at the the so let me ask you so I'm in a different situation which is I moved all the way across the country to be here for 8 years I audition hold on yeah we can pause I want to pause because this can't okay this can't continue we can just give her to someone give her a steak covered in ambian we can probably just let her out front right and see what happens yeah this seems like really friendly territory for a tiny dog up in the mountains where the coyotes run free they're on my property right now because the mudslides from the river storm thing yeah half my Hill came down all into my pool I know stupid people problems but pool all the way up in mud and could come down on the house so now the fence that we had up there they just come down they can smell the animals I just texted Rachel to we too have have to in our yard snuff the dog out I could take out my anger against my own dogs on your dogs cool but back to me yeah of course you're a sh I'm a Sho forever known I might get canceled after this interview but you know what it's time it wasn't like a me to female you didn't know you were just like get back everyone get back I know we have talked about your time out but it's so relevant we were on a plane flight the other day and there was a guy being rude to the flight attendant very and Dax I could see he was starting to spiral out about needing to protect this flight attendant yeah as one should as you should but also this's a cheap shot but when you watch your mom get beat up by stepdads it ain't happening on my watch I understand [ __ ] it hate me you agree you see that watch my mom go into a coma from the same thing so I've got you it's going to be in my book too yeah this is a thick book I hope I have time it's be a thousand Pages it's actually something I'm working on so all the things too oh good we're at the same spot in life by the way and that's a point I was about to make but go ahead Monaco I cut you no but you had something then she cut you off but she's entitled too okay good that's nice I was just going to say that you gave him an eye of like I see you I see what you're doing he kind of stopped and then after you decided to look him up cuz you because pretty damn me we were coming back from what a was it a fam person that's what I call them itj fam adjacent but we were happy to see it was like oh [ __ ] what if I whole thing I had moderated a panel for Amazon that night in South by Southwest we get on the plane this guy's a [ __ ] [ __ ] I look at him and I'm like I see you you're a [ __ ] dick and I'm staring at him he goes hi and I won't answer I'm just staring a hole through him and then he goes you were so funny at the panel last night and then I went no no then I went oh [ __ ] he's high up at Amazon I just kind of [ __ ] the bed and pissed someone off that had basically brought me out there to work so then I'm spiraling for the whole flight he's one seat in front of us he opens up his laptop I see his name I panic write it down and then as soon as we land I look him up thank God and you would have guessed it he's a [ __ ] lawyer the point is you just don't know who you're dealing you don't know who you're shoving you don't know who you're staring at you just don't know Bowl in a china shop a Tony Award nominated actress you got to be careful out there one of my childhood favorites when you're trying to protect I seriously have no bone to pick with you about like it just made Martin and I laugh like I said Kristen yes she was awesome in the show but she wasn't that awesome [ __ ] Michael Jackson not Obama that's a bad it's not Obama yes I almost said Michael Jackson then I was like we okay we're running out of [ __ ] referen say it's like Bill Cosby oh no no it's like [ __ ] it's like Bill no don't do okay okay I cut you off okay so all I was going to say is I moved here I could not get a job Punk was my first thing as I got and I haven't had it for 10 years so I have been out here begging to get hired for 30 years and this started and I retired from acting a couple years ago but for me I felt so good about that to me I was like oh my God I'm finally not begging you to like me but I got to choose it and I think that's the only difference like I wonder if you got to choose that I'm unplugging from this whole experience versus the choice was made for you and I think it's really fascinating how the way things come into your life and the way it's framed really impacts how you can then take it you didn't get to pick no and I wonder if you got to pick if you'd be feeling kind of the Elation I have which is like oh I'm off the treadmill where I'm not worried how the last thing did don't say treadmill to a [ __ ] don't have say treadmill sorry I'm out of the [ __ ] say that I'm actually allowed to say that you're allowed to say whatever you want sa baby I'm allowed to say whatever I want but you should give us a list of words we can't say I don't care what you say like I'm not precious about any words but people might be precious cuz I do throw certain words around but I'm allowed to now yeah but I also have better parking than all of you so but no I did not want this it [ __ ] sucks balls like hairy old saggy balls that stink with a taint just bad ball Athletic ball ball no I didn't want to stop but in the last year here it has been nice to just sleep and I haven't slept in 50 whatever years how many years I've been doing this I've been in Sag since 1974 so w all those years I haven't slept I haven't not had to show up I haven't not had to be on and pretend you've not been contacted by a second ad to schedule a wardrobe fitting across town I enjoy it but if I could switch the phone I'd rather not be disabled 100% but at least you know at this point in my life I can kind of pick and choose for a minute what I would want to do if I wasn't disabled I could finish dead to me and gone like Let's Take 6 months off and then let's find something kind of cool two weeks work or 6 weeks work or whatever I have the ability to be able to do that after all these years I don't have that choice and I don't like not being able to have the choice of course you don't have control have you noticed you know less about our business now I don't know what movies did I don't know what shows are were I don't know what actors making a lot of money I just don't know anything anymore oh I know nothing I don't know who anyone is we did the Oscar pool which we always do every year and I haven't watched a movie in years I watch reality television because it comforts me watching actors stresses me out because I can see they're acting and then I get really mad and then I'm like but reality television I'm like yes I can fall asleep to this I didn't miss anything you go to sleep they bickering you wake up they're bickering yeah exactly it's the most wonderful thing and like the traitors is the best show that's ever been on television great reality he knows you know he knows Rob and I talk for half an hour about the Traders what's the Traders best show on television it's a competition show right kind of but it's manipulative it's CD and it's cuckoo and the one in America they do with reality stars so it's like a bunch of people from Bravo and then the people from Survivor but the ones outside of America are just people like a doctor and a lady who works at a Chapo shop and they have to manipulate each other in order to get to the end to win this huge amount of money it's so fun it's like werewolves and villagers a little bit but on like TV then I've heard of it and Kristen just suggested that we should watch it with the girls yeah people really love it I also love naked and afraid and my daughter and I love naked and afraid it's a very important show to us we sit here often I was like I could totally do this I know now I know what bomo is I know the first thing you should do is make shoes if you're in a hot climate you know I know how to start fire and sti's like yeah totally we could totally do this and then both of us looked at each other and she goes mom you're disabled you can't and I said and you have pots which is a heart condition and I was like well I guess neither one of us are going to be on the show it's not going to happen I said we will not realize his dream we' just launched the dream has been crushed have he done alone with her or they're up in the artist yeah yeah oh I love alone that's a good one with the kids she hasn't seen it but I've watched it my husband who's a musician but his real passion is survival he's a instructor what wow oh my goodness I shoved the wrong guy he could have [ __ ] cut my throat honestly he probably would he could take you down I'm sorry but he teaches it in fact he's in Canada right now doing 3 to four weeks of training for other people so he's certified no that's his Jam I had no idea oh yeah he could like make an igloo somewhere and liveing it he'd be totally fine how comforting I regularly have the fantasy we're somewhere and I'm like what if the [ __ ] hits the fan right now you know like we have a bus at home that's why I feel safe I'm like yeah when the [ __ ] is a fan we get in that bus it's got a generator we're good for a few weeks figure [ __ ] out that makes me feel safe and for you you're like I live with a [ __ ] survivalist on those shows they get a fire starter that dude can make a fire with a bow drill which is not easy I it I'd be dead you got to get the little bow right and then you get it going really fast on the thing but it's not as easy as it no and you're adding hay to it it's called a nest you make a nest it's it's too much it's too much stay tuned for more armchair expert if you [Music] dare okay we have to touch down and this relates to your show messy because the first episode you guys interview Edie Falco which of course is her matriarch from her experience yeah and then you have your own matriarch Katie comes over and lays in the bed I know Katie and she is [ __ ] awesome she's one of my favorite humans I've ever met those two [ __ ] raise me so if you have a problem with me it's their fault so how old were you and you got on the show 16 or something of all the different TV experiences in the history of Television that's in the top 10 of craziest rides someone could take it was a new network it was super provocative it was enormous it was every headline but I didn't know it I'm a kid from Laurel Canyon man I really don't know things I didn't even know it was big clearly there was a light switch of recognizability though where you're moving through the world and now you're realizing like oh geez I think one in four people I was also like kind of a dick kid like a tough girl so also was not recognizable when I leave work I didn't wear those dresses Janice Joplin was my favorite artist I was like this hippie weirdo no makeup kind of grungy and kind of gross so I just went around the world like that and also there were no cell phones there wasn't that thing I stayed in my own pocket which was my friends from the canyon I didn't really hang out with Hollywood people or actors I kind of just hung out in the canyon what lot was that on we had two different Lots we started out at Sunset Gower that would have been easy from here oh it was so nice and then you moved to Fox Sony there's no good way to get there I know if you're not from La I try to tell people this my dream in life and the thing I would still cut off a tote acting would be a Tarantino movie well there you just put it out you put it out a lot if Tarantino was shooting at the Sony lot I don't know from where I live I don't know yeah exactly see I don't like going on locations too much so I thought if someone was like out of the country I don't know yeah at this point yeah Kristen did it a couple years ago and she was like that's it's the last time I'll try to do that it's too hard you've got multiple babies then I'm bringing them over and oh it's just oh and as a mom I mean they came up with something in the science that we actually have our children's DNA in our brain as moms I'm probably going to sound insane but I read something we fact check on Tik Tok it wasn't on TI to no it was like a study it was a study from a place that's reput reputable that we have part of their DNA that has gone from the belly into our brains so that makes us really weird that makes total sense because your immune system is looking for things that do not have your DNA and then destroying them so obviously it has to know the baby's DNA so it doesn't destroy the baby I told stie that today she's like that's really freaky I don't like that mom you sound like a cannibal mom she said different words but she's 13 and she cusses more than I do okay so you didn't know that it was what it was sorry I didn't I really didn't listen I was in real America I was in Michigan in that show he there was this new network everyone loved it I can't remember having a show experience other than Married with Children where it was like oh my God this is an hour a show we all watch and we all talk about they treated us like absolute [ __ ] just know like we were like the black sheep we didn't get we didn't get syndication 11 years on a TV show I get checks for $125 oh oh no when they sold us into syndication they told us we were not a real Network oh right they got out of it oh yeah they gave me a bonus a very small bonus was a fraction of what I was making a week that's all we got and probably the first cycle they sold was probably a billion dollar deal it was 100 million the first time and then it just kept happening over and over again right it plays like 20 times a day in like 150 countries and I get a check for a125 every once in a while I feel like I might leave a 20 behind cuz I enjoy it still okay can you just yeah just give me some money wait that's crazy you'd think they would have writed that in retrospect they got because they weren't a network Fox was not a network they were under a different agreement through S no it was because there was ABC CBS and NBC I'm just saying they probably had a different agreement with the guilds those networks did and this was sliding in through the cable we were just literally [ __ ] on and then when we got cancelled they didn't tell us 10 years out 11 11 11 Seasons 11 season no we were not told that we were canceled Eddie found out from a couple at a cabin place that he was at that had heard it on the radio oh my God and this is actually true and you should have him on the show cuz he's fantastic to talk to or listen to he said this couple came up and said I'm so sorry about your show and he's like what are you talking about like well it was cancelled literally we didn't know oh wow wow we didn't get a fruit basket not thanks for the 11 years no of starting a network you're literally the very first show to ever air on Fox and it was a huge hit not at first because no one had it it came on on channel 50 after 8:00 yeah when you had to have a coat hanger and one person would hold ITF yeah but we were the very first show to ever air yes that night was three shows I think it was I don't know Tracy almond show maybe was that the first night we have to fact check that cuz there was only three shows it wasn't the Simpsons cuz people say that we stole the Simpsons hello I'm sorry they're doing they actually were an intertial on the Tracy Alman show that's where they started do you know that the working title for the show was not The Cosby Show or no no that was the working title of Silver Spoons sorry no that was our title no wait hold on that was our title not The Cosby Show you just reminded me of something I wanted to ask you but I had skimmed over it cuz we were already at Married with Children you did all these guest roles as a teenager and you were on Silver Spoons which I loved when I was a kid you were on the shows with all the heart throbs you were on Charles in Charge Silver Spoons Ricky schroer was every girl call him Rick now but then he was Ricky I had a white Swatch cuz he had a white Swatch baitman was on it for the first that's where he gets his launch no I've known these boys forever did you have crushes on any of these boys not my type I like toothless punk rockers uhhuh the D that's what I married one yeah who's no survivalist but he doesn't have his front teeth oh he doesn't no he hasn't since he was 20 oh wonderful and he wears like a little um oh he just runs with no teeth Punk that's awesome why were you so attracted to punk rock my mom said when I was a kid I've never met a junkie I didn't like so that's a fun thing to tell your kid my mom never met an alcoholic she didn't marry yeah yeah all of them we can acknowledge you weren't aware of it but you at this point understand that every boy in America was in love with you it went Molly ring wall and you you had your pick of the entire I like the ones that didn't like me I've got that disease how deep have you drilled into that never met a junk you didn't like I love him love love a little dump chaos that they bring I think it's the familiarity it's like sexy I don't know is it weird weird you can't control what you like my boyfriend died in 2008 from heroin so it's not like a funny thing that was one of the most devastating things that has ever happened to me in my life well there's been many I joke about it but my heart still is ripped out of my chest because of that again it's similar to the MS it happened to you you don't get to know whether you would have on your own no and you want to help them and I tried three years things were good and then as you know it's up to them and then I had to go take my Talons out and go I can't and it was within a week once I said I can't he was gone and I hold that guilt so deep inside of me and it doesn't matter how much intellectually you know of course but I was like what more could I have done and yeah we make just I say these things but you know by way personally and right up front you get to cuz you've earned it like you say you make Ms jokes we're all drunks and junkies but I'm allowed to do that cuz yeah we're allow yeah yeah yeah CU I'm representing myself also I think if we really went to that place it's too much we'd be on the floor and then we'd never come back up off the floor and I'm really honest about that I make jokes I made jokes at the Emmys I couldn't even say the word disability I was like this my brain was like I make these jokes because if I don't I'll suffocate I'll be done I'm not ready for the healing yet and I'm being very honest I will get there but when someone says have you accepted this as your new normal no [ __ ] you absolutely not right yeah that's what our podcast messy is about it's Jamie and I really talking about this and she has Ms which I didn't yeah she's had it for 20 years and she hid it for 10 wow did you become friends after the diagnosis or were you friends before peripherally we have known each other from our friend Lance Bass for years you also have a shared experience we're both kids on an impossibly huge show yeah when I told Lance about it he's like you got to talk to Jamie so that's kind of how this started Jamie and I would get on the phone and we talk for like 2 or 3 hours and it was healing lots of tears and then of course me making fun and then we laugh and then tears more and then all of a sudden we're like I think this might help people even if we're not talking about Ms like me having constipation and if you go into my bathroom there are gloves in there CU sometimes I have to pull [ __ ] out of my own [ __ ] you know just being honest about stuff experience of this we always talk about if she and I could go together as one person we would be the most perfect disabled person because she's really like we've got to find light and we've got to move forward and I'm like [ __ ] this but if we came together we'd be perfect yeah yeah yeah so that's kind of what messy is I listened and it's great and I was listening to the Edie Falco episode I just love her I've never met her but I feel that same pull towards her as I did Katie and then Pro that Katie was exactly who I had hoped she would be and I get that hunch that Edie is also cut from that same cloth which I think it's very weird that both of you had similar archetype mothers sorry I'm burping no take your time I might throw up I have a throwy upy thing anyway I do it from right here we're in your bedroom I'm in my gray Gardens as I call it and then Jam's in Austin and our producers in New York so it's really just whenever someone wants to come on we're like okie dokie and listening to Edie and Jamie talk about stuff you know I don't want to it's heartbreaking you should spoil it you should but they Rel ship and Jamie realizing that she wasn't getting what that she needed from Edie she held on to that and then Edie explaining why I was sitting there hands on chin like oh this is deep I was proud of both of them for being so transparent about what the experience was like 's like you had parents there and you were very taip Bay and you seem very on top of it and then Jamie's like I was so afraid I didn't belong there and I was trying to act very prepared and like I knew everything Ed saying I was afraid of you and Jamie going what it is a great reminder of what you think is going on versus what another person thinks is going on and how disjointed those realities are you telling me I shoved you against the wall I'm like wow that's news to me I didn't even think I could do something like that but yeah just hearing both people for maybe the first time they're talking about how they really felt like something that maybe they could have done on day nine the first time they had ever spoken about this it came as such a shock when we do the zoom obviously we can see each other and that's just so we can watch each other but Allison and I were like whoa should we leave what is happening and even Jamie like tears coming it was really intense and the fact that there was a moment where Edie knew she was struggling and had a lot of insecurity and saw her be great on an episode wrote her a letter telling her how great she was on the episode and that Jamie wanted so bad to respond and thank her but she just never did and then 's like I don't even know if she cared that I did that those missed opportunities C that's beautiful and that's kind of what we're doing eventually we'll talk to people we don't know but first of all Jamie and I are going to talk that's kind of the show is just the two of us and then we'll have our friends and our family and we have Marty Short and we've got people that we've already done and we got a good little list but no one's promoting we don't have questions which makes us like the worst interviewers ever because we're like sue what' you have to eat today I don't know I mean but eventually hopefully something will happen can you tell me cuz I'm really undereducated in this my girlfriend in high school's mom had Ms my understanding was the milon sheath around your spinal cord is breaking down and then you get all this electrical interference and do we know much about this disease do we know how it begins are you predisposed to it genetically what happens physically no no yes and no and no okay let's move on next question no no no I'm going to explain what I know if there was an understanding of how one gets a mess then there would be better treatments luckily they do have what they call B cell treatments which most of us are on which are infusions of acris or cassa which is pretty hardcore stuff it's almost like like a and I don't want to say this cuz people are going to be it's not chemo it's like a form of that where it's killing all the B cells in your body that are attacking your nervous system so you have something in your body that's attacking your nervous system no I have 30 lesions on my brain like herpes surus basically okay so sores all over my brain my biggest one is behind my right eye so my right eye hurts a lot oh [ __ ] does it affect your vision not right now but it hurts and then other people don't even have them on their brain they have like a couple on the spine what it does is it just affects the nervous system so we all kind of have the issue with Mobility it's different per person how it shows up on Jamie is very different of how it shows up on me my hand starts to go weird and then I'll get a seizur feeling sometimes in my brain but not all the time I'm going to guess the brain thing to me would be scarier than the arm I'm not really happy about all the ones in my brain if you think that I'm just sitting here with 30 lesions on my brain it's not fun one to hang with Harvard put out a study that you know of course they're not claiming anything they're saying like we're seeing a course you can look this up to there's a correlation that anyone who has Epstein bar virus wait with hypothyroidism and the herp they're seeing that that's kind of a correlation I have all three not on the vagina to clarify I don't have the herpy on the vagini I get a little cold sore from a pineapple and by pineapple I mean dick just kidding I mean di dipped in pineapple yeah a dick dipped in pineapp and a couple people I know who have MS have all those three things so we're not going to claim that we're not going to send it off in a letter but it's kind of promising they're thinking hm we're seeing that the people that do have it have all those three things it's the three things and I have hypothyroidism which is you don't make enough like I'm slow right okay so that might be the precursors to it and then what has happened in recent time with the phological treatments for have there been good progress made like of 10 what would you give the treatment you know this is a disease forever for us and back before they had the B cell treatments people just died from it you just knew you got it and then you're just dead so we're prolonging life with these treatments now doesn't mean that I'm going to be around in 10 years you know I don't know so that's the scary thing about Ms there is no endgame you know I've had cancer too well I was going to get into this it's fun talks but you kind of it's hard to explain that too because I was able to catch it early because of my being a hypochondriac and now I don't really have to worry about breast cancer not going to say the other cancers cuz that's up for grabs who knows but this one is like this is it this is life there's no surgical option there's no like ringing the bell when you're done with chemo you live with this for the rest of your life and either you're going to die from it or you're going to die in a car crash I don't know but that's kind of the end game on this for now we hope in our lifetime that someone will be like we've got it oh my God that'll be so great great but it's a disease at progression and you just progressively get worse I would imagine mentally like the definition of depression right is that you foresee the future being worse than the presidents the presidents yes there also that then the present is and when you're given a diagnosis that literally says well that's the facts I don't know how someone wrestles themselves out of that it's the worst tattoo today's the best I'm going to be physically yeah that's a Mountain on your mind I would imagine I'm not going to sit here and like some people go like oh my God cancer was the best thing that ever happened to me and I'm like oh you had a pretty shitty life that's the best thing you should go to Disneyland yeah do something else but this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life I hate it so much and I'm so mad about it you can't overcome it people go like well why don't you exercise because I can't right like it hurts the second my feet hit my carpet in the morning and they're hurting as bad as they do every single day then I go [ __ ] it I'm just going to lay back in bed and then I'm being the worst mser we should be stretching we should be trying to walk for 5 minutes and then you beat yourself up for that I beat myself up about that yeah and then I'll have a day where i'm not as bad and I'm like oh I can do a couple things then I'm down for 4 days so it's a [ __ ] she's a total I'm going to say the word [ __ ] she's a [ __ ] and you go push and then it pushes right on back like she is a mean girl that's the thing that I struggle with cuz everyone's like come on you're feeling good today let's go do something and I'm like well then I'll do it and then I'm going to be in bed five days yeah any Victory is not a victory it's going to be puric and you're going to be I know I'm like such the downer guy like a lot of people are like let's wear orange and let's do the W you know what I love the race to erase Ms so you're going to run in front of me okay go ahead this is like the orgy to help erectile dysfunction this is not putting down the race TOS at all or atile dysfunction no I think someone's not doing something right you have Ed well first of all I think you do a much better service by saying I feel like this and I hate this because I think a lot of the people that are dealing with what you're dealing are like on top of everything else I don't seem to have this sunny disposition about this ailment I've been given and I feel now isolated and alone and like I'm not doing it right on top of everything else I actually think it's a much bigger service can I just say I hate they beat cancer like it implies my dad didn't fight hard enough yeah no there's a lot of triggers for me about this you feel shitty about your performance on top of everything else is that what we need I had a friend who is in the public eye and she got cancer and posted and look I'm going to put myself down in a minute but she said if there's anyone that can beat it it's going to be me and I said take it down I said take it down right now yes because someone's mom just died and she was pretty strong exactly someone's daughter just died someone's sister just died someone's dad just died from this yeah take it down I said what you're going to do is you're going to be honest every step of the way through your chemo your radiation all this stuff and it ended up that people really were helped by what yes of course the vulnerability and sharing your fears and I learned that lesson the hard way because in 2008 when I had breast cancer at 36 years old I went out and I was the good girl talking about oh I love my new boobs right that are all scarred and [ __ ] up what was I thinking my first interview was with Robin Roberts when I had cancer and you know I'm sitting there lying my my ass off about how I felt I got up and I literally fell into the wall you weren't there cuz you didn't push me but you were like [ __ ] I haven't fallen This Heart since Dak sheer shoved me shoved a woman and I fell into the wall and sobbed cuz it was a lie everything I was saying was a freaking lie it was me trying to convince myself of something and I think that did no service to anyone yes I started a foundation right away yes I did all the things that I had to do and we raised Millions of dollars for women to get MRIs who were at high risk yes we did a good thing but at the back of it I was taking off my bra and crying every night and I wish that I had said that yeah yes cuz then you have a fraudulence on top of the pain also like I want that woman who's feeling like that to not be like oh Christina Applegate she loves her boobies I don't like my boobies I still don't like my boobies it's horrible I don't have nipples that's not something I talk about I don't have nipples it's weird I can wear a tank top and no headlights no point no headlights I will find that's a silver lighting you can really go in frigid climates that'll be something un naked afraid and no one's ever going to know that I'm cold no one will know your tits will never betray you no and they don't move either you can't push them like look at me trying to push my tits they're just there forever I was wondering there's a lot of [ __ ] I love about AA one of them is I learned early on that self-pity is the opposite side of the coin is self-aggrandisement so like I would always feel stupid bragging and thinking I'm hotter [ __ ] than I am but also self-pity I'm doing this because I want to speak upon that when you're done I'm setting you up for this because you won't know what I'm going to about to talk about but keep your fingers crossed I'm doing I police myself as much on self-pity as I do on self aggrandisement because I have admitted to myself it's equally I'm making myself more important than I am the universe isn't conspiring against Dak Shepard I'm not that [ __ ] important it is God so I'm wondering hey what are your thoughts about self-pity in you have to police yourself cuz if I were you this is me I'm not saying you should feel this way I would go yeah this makes sense I got way too much luck and now I'm getting way too much bad luck so I got cancer at 36 that's ridiculous I'm sorry I didn't have luck I was really talented oh I would I would have said this life was so Charmed I feel that way about my life it's abnormally Charmed I'm talented but so were a lot of people the grings that didn't make it I have a very [ __ ] charm life bad things happen to me yeah she had much more Talent than me I was there with her we started together but I would start saying to myself oh God now it's flipping on me I would make the universe pointed at myself that's what I would have to fight and of course I'm just curious if those kind of thoughts cross your mind okay so the book's going to come out so I'm not going to talk about too much it's been a shitty life I'm not going to lie all the stuff that you saw was like a really really good Alexander McQueen jacket performance jacket that was pretty that's fashion I put on the jacket and then I went out into the world and I pretended to be something that I wasn't and behind cloes stor was pretty Grim I'm starting to write my book like in a couple weeks so I don't want to say too much but it's also it's making we want to read it you're going to think I'm literally making this up and it's not like oh my God I didn't have enough toilet paper that day it's stuff abuse it's things yeah so anyway I did this because being grandiose about oneself I remember being 13 years old and I was on a show called Heart of the City a detective show you were on it for 2 years people were liking it and so I said to one of my friends that I had grown up with if you ever see me start to get lost let me know and one day we were in the car and we were driving by 20th Century Fox it was just where we shot it and on the radio was the doors you know she's a 20th Century Fox and I said oh my God that's so funny and she whispered into my ear she goes you're doing it and that was actually the last time I ever spoke about myself really no I'll get calls from my mom and she's like you got nominated for an Emmy I have been so embarrassed embarrassed by it my whole life that I don't tell anyone not my family nothing I don't talk about it you think you've robbed yourself of some deserved self- conratulations no because now I am the [ __ ] now I'm like yeah pretty good pretty good stuff [ __ ] yes one after another after another after another after another yeah I'm proud you can't get lucky 29 times in a row I did that until just recently I was embarrassed by it was it important to you to not shine so bright cuz you were living out a dream your mother started no no no no no no no no I always say that the secret to success is to be mediocre success then people don't need the downfall I would have loved the $20 million $50 million paycheck for that movie it's not that I chose not to everyone chose that for me but I feel like I've been here for 50 years because I kind of have stayed at the right in the lane you didn't fly too close to the Sun why you'd get burned that's right Icarus we were just talking about this Monica we were yeah we were just talking about it but the brass Rings love too but you only get it once there's only one way to go there's only one story left to tell about that person we were just interviewing Bradley Cooper and this came up he said do you think people have to see someone fall and I said yeah it's the only story left I can't even blame people we think in story so it's like what's the third act for this person they can't get higher so they got to go lower but they grasp for it then you're like you're boring me with your crap acting that's why I don't watch I'm like stop it inspire me do something are there any shows you love though do you like White Lotus I haven't seen it oh my lord it's so good I'm terrible you're a bad sag member I know I'm a Ted lasso guy I'm like a only murderers oh I love only Mur you like lighthearted you want to feel happy yeah yeah that's fair and I'm cracking jokes all day long so when I sit down I want to see like murder and tragedy and I need the opposite but we didn't get to self-pity oh God yeah I totally hate myself especially now I gained 45 lbs when I got sick from medication I've lost 30 lbs in the last few months not from OIC my I have a stomach issue so my eating it's very tiny is Ms at all is there a diet that's better for yeah Mediterranean no glut isn't that like forever for everyone write books about it and you're like but we're pretty sure that's probably the best way yeah I eat a piece of Cinnamon Toast a day like I'm not doing all the things I'm supposed to be doing but you know it's hard for me because I was always fit lady but I also had eating disorders and weird stuff for years and being like this now which is hard and I don't do the plastic surgeries and I don't do the things I my equipment do you want me to you sure you don't want me to I did do a threadlift in 2018 how was that that was Rad but it goes away oh it does does the thread dissolve yeah oh my Lord but I went to a doctor two years ago and I was like I want to go again and he goes your face is too fat oh he literally was like mic drop you fat you can't get one jeez jeez oh oh wow wow so that made me feel real good about myself he turned down all that money first of all I doubt your face is fat secondly rare ethics you want to talk to Michael Jackson's guy and go how could you possibly gone in on that nose again you can't do that like how could you have possibly gone in on the nose again I'm more concerned about the propal by the nightstand there's a few doctors that were yeah the doctor that was like yeah I'll knock you out every single night of your life propal yes yep I love propop fall that's fun for your colonoscopy exactly for a major surgery I know can you imagine being put down every night anesthesia I've had many surgeries and you got a prep for a surgery they don't want you on prop fall with any food in your stomach you aspirate like was he preop preop his whole life is that why he's so thin he's constantly propping for surgery do you think he had some of those surgeries on his nose Michael Jackson is a whole other episode I have lots of thoughts on that one I'll table it oh wait I hav tell you this Michael Jackson funny one of my best friends her name is frell and we've known each other since we were 13 years old we met on some steps down on Lookout and she comes up she had blue hair she goes you got a [ __ ] cigarette that's how we met and we've been friends ever since when we were younger not even then she thought that the song said get down with the porn stars Don't Stop Till You Get Enough get down with the porn star yeah I can see where she thought that it's not it's not it's not get down with the porn stars but it could be Don't Stop Till You Get Enough come on with no see you don't know I love that song too I play it a couple times a week be honest did you ever get invited where to the ranch oh yeah his dad had a birthday party pre yes allegations and now we know for certain yeah well I say that no he definitely was a pedophile who ruined the lives of a bunch of little kids I'm not denying that there weren't even allegations yet at this point no every friend of mine who's been in this business for a very long time like Seth Green he went mind we've talked about it on the show anyone that was young that was around and popular at that time they got invited to 20s actually invited me Joe Jackson yeah that's very weird for him if you think about it no he came up to me with the chimp you met bubbles y so my friends who have been there to the ran what was it called The Mystery Ranch Neverland Ranch the mystery this a Scooby-Doo the Magical Mystery Tour of rape oops it was insane it was Disneyland oh it was awesome yes well yeah he built it for kids in himself he was a kid well his own mental yeah okay yeah but you met bubbles went to Bubbles house and I went on the swing Roundy bouty thing and it was playing all his music good music I heard he rebuilt the Pirates of the Caribbean at never not when I was there this was so long ago I mean this is pre any marriages right of all of them yeah yeah [Music] yeah stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare [Music] okay so you're doing the podcast messy messy messy and it's very well done and you're very good at it and I'm glad you're doing that and then I read that you'll voice Act is that true yeah of course as long as I can speak I'd love to do that it' be fun mama needs to do something okay so we were honest about the darkness of this on the mornings you do get yourself to have a good day and you're positive what are the tools that you use that are helpful so not inspiring do you meditate I get mad at it yeah see this is the thing I'm a super spiritual person I've been going to a church called Agape since I was 24 years old I've been in spiritual since I was little my mom got me meditating at 8 years old my belief in what the universe is or God as people call it or not God or whatever it's very strong very convicted in what I believe not going to alter that I believe that aliens came down just kidding and built pyramid they just built the pyramids and that's what happened it's weird it's like I shove away from it the more angry I get which is when you should be kind of tapping into that stuff yeah I get pissed but we have a coin out of my Leni which you'll see there's a coin my friend Rob zabi gave to me who's an amazing magician and he's works at the Magic Castle but he's also kind of the most amazing person I've ever known and he gave me a coin from the Magic Castle and it kind of became our prayer coin so anyone that comes here we sit and if something's going on in one of our friends lives or we need a minute we hold the coin we got to pray on the coin and the coin has actually gotten heavier in weight because of the energy that's in it it's holding the yeah I mean that's science we know what science is right Universe E equals MC squ I don't even know what that means but we hold the coin so when I'm feeling that stuff I hold the coin and just get quiet about it have you done mushrooms oh when I was 16 I have an amazing story about this tell me my friend Mandy and I we took some mushrooms I think I was 16 at her house and we started watching comic release so this is how long ago it was people don't even know what that is I do it was on comy Central raised money Robin Williams whoopy Goldberg and Billy Crystal hosting it we were laughing so hard that we kept calling on the dial phone to the telephone to use her dad's credit card to donate money and we did this all night long God and we spent like hundreds of dollars and we got in really big trouble and that was the first and last time I've ever done mushrooms has anyone advised you to do it drugs are not for me no thank you you just tried them and no or you just never Tred them and no and I don't like it no thank you I forced Monica to do them not other not like heroin I couldn't do heroin because I would just keep doing it yes as most people going to the hospital you're like yes thank you deloted you know your disposition I can't nope yep yep yep bye thumbs down okay well then I'm I'm not going to push shs in particular are supposed to be uniqu good for situations that you're in yeah I have that brain that like take me out of right this moment I'm going to go cuck Town my mom gave me a pot Edibles stick a vape a joint no a joint oldfashioned Laurel Canyon [ __ ] yeah she's not doing so well and she's like this might get your pain away this was actually before I knew I had Ms is when they thought I had something called peripheral neuropathy and I'm in such pain all the time it really really hurts but anyway she's like just try it so I sat out on the Leni and I smoked it like you would at 15 back when it was is not potent not a good choice not a good move for you not a good move I was alone in my room and you in a little B and I called her I said what the hell did you give me and she goes how much did you have and I said like half of it she goes oh my god oh go this is why I haven't smoked pot since I was 15 I did everything s you're not listening to this at that time and got it over with yeah except for heroin smartly and crack he missed out it's pretty good anyway not really interested but that was a bad call oops Welly thanks for letting us come over and take your time and I'm sure you're in pain and that cannot be easy and I'm mindful of it and I appreciate it I don't know if you ever heard our show but this is what I'm all about is sharing like [ __ ] battle not the victory speech on a stage somewhere so I'm very grateful to you well this has been the most fun I've had in like 3 years seriously we come back we'll come back once a week I sit in here by myself yeah pretty much all day long and you're not doing drugs no oh God God you really need them you really should start White Lotus before you guys got here he was in here and I said now I have to pause my show which was real housewi of Miami Reunion Part Two you must watch couples therapy the most incredible therapist Ora it's so good okay okay okay okay so good you're going to blast through it okay I'm actually going to text myself Lee cuz I have to text because I have all the lesions on the brains you're still so quick yeah I know I'm pretty smart have you at all have you I'm pretty smart and I'm pretty funny the Carly similarity I was going to tell you as soon as we left you remind me so much of dax's sister yeah you look so much like my little sister it makes me kind of like love you more than I have a right to love you but I'm looking at your little face and it's so Carly's and I love her so much watch no that's not the face it's just your normal face is very Carly yeah even the mannerisms and stuff and so it has me feeling like very very of course protective of you a I love that he'll shove me out of the way for you yeah I'll shove Rob and Monica before we leave I feel very alone so I like to be protected okay good I'm the dude wasn't that so great what a dichotomy oh yes you're protecting me but you also abuse me well isn't this the story of no but as I like to call it a dichotomy anyway no so both things both things you know that I hold no grudge about that it's just funny I totally believe you because I've been around had no idea I had no idea and I've been around you a bunch of times since then and I didn't feel any animosity but I do like the book ending not that there won't be more experiences but but this is a reverse of a shove into a wall yeah there you go all right I adore you thanks so much for doing this everyone should listen to messy it comes out the 19th of March on all streaming things okay great so check out Messi and I love you and I'm so glad I got to come sit in your bedroom this is very unique and we got to listen to your daughter play music yes this pry incredible smell all the dog pee in my room for the amount of pets I'm seeing it doesn't smell in here at all well I burn nog Champa in here all day long cuz I love nog cha it's a very childhood thing so I offset the nasty and normally my bed's really made it's more made than mine is you'll love this before we go these are my heating pads I snuggle them and they're called Jake Ryan Jake Ryan 16 Candles oh yes of course the darkhaired gentleman that Molly was in love with is he still the number one cuz the early ones are they stay the number one don't they he's in my heart forever yeah he drove that red 944 Porsche yeah I'm 52 years old and I've named heating pad Jake Ryan I think suffice it to say that is the jam you obviously met him over the years did you no Michael schling I don't even have to say his name I hope he's listening yeah love all right all right bye good luck with everything great to see you next up is the fact check I don't even care about facts I just want to get in your [Music] pants well I want to tell people tell people some updates okay okay you have joined my connections group chat which has me Callie Max Andie Robbie Robbie my friend from home yes it's it's time for me to tell you Robbie as a PhD okay I'm not intimidated by a PhD okay great yeah you could have got a PhD thank you I think so yeah what's his in what's his in psychometrics psychometric Tri uhuh it's a mixture of psychology and statistics oh that's kind of cool it it is very cool okay so but the best part was is let's start at the beginning I love connections now I've only been playing it for three days and now it's like it used to be get through the meditation the reward was coffee nicotine and then get through the journaling and I could have my phone but I don't really care about having my phone it's more just like oh there's stuff to do on it I've got to tend to while I doy it's like you have to it's not really a reward but now connections is in my life and now there's like a huge reward in the morning to get I'm so happy you think that I love it okay now the other thing is you put me on the thread yep but I he has to be on the thread yeah I well I think I said you and cie you did but and I actually got nervous about this because oh when we were talking about you're like I want to be on your thread I want to be on your thread and I and I said okay it's it's Kylie Max and my friend Robbie certainly did and I didn't remember that yeah I had a feeling so yeah cuz I think I text you and cie and then you put me on the thread but the two of the numbers are they're just numbers it's 10 numbers because I don't have them in my phone book okay even though I said in the text You Know Thy guy Max and now you need a nickname for Robbie I feel like maybe you weren't reading I might not I might have missed it cuz there's so many people and there's a lot of um screen grabs of the puzzle itself and I might have got distracted by the puzzles I didn't see that and now it's great um but okay back to Robbie yeah he got it with no mistakes so did Max oh he did today I haven't played today okay um so but you know sorry Callie I hate to do this to you she didn't she didn't get it today she I don't know if you could see that can you tell that from the pictures no I'm new to this whole thing I didn't know Robbie Max's were I am I just know you and Cali oh my God I feel I don't know why I feel like stressed out oh you do a little bit why do you think I'm not going to like your friends or they're not going to like me no it's it's not about they're not going to like you cuz you brought me no they'll they love me okay and it's not about you liking them or them it's not about liking yeah it's just I have a weird thing with you it's just the truth I feel anxious if you're uncomfortable I but I know I know I just I just I try to Rack my brain of when like my discomfort has put you up cuz a i I'm almost never uncomfortable like wouldn't you say I'm just generally kind of happy you are uncomfortable and you also get upset with things and and not always I'm not it's not like like just your main disposition but would you be comfortable giving me an example cuz I'm having a hard time finding purchase in this where like I'm someone you got to tiptoe around and I might blow up or I'm angry or I'm G to be really unhappy and I'm I'm having a hard time remembering those uh events okay the plan coming back from South by oh where I was angry at the guy who was mistreating the flight attendant yes you sure yeah I was mad at that guy but did you feel like you that just stresses you out that's what you're saying it stresses me out that you are not at equilibrium okay or you're like upset you were upset with him and I didn't know where that was going to lead and that made me anxious oh right like there could be some violence or something not I mean I didn't think you were going to like punch him or anything but I thought there was a fair chance I just want to isolate it I'm not trying to put you on the spot I'm trying to isolate cuz if it is your fear that I'm going to get into it with other people that I totally can understand that yeah that's sort of what that mean but I'm musing it together with your fear that I was going to not have a good time in India yeah that's part of it or that's not part of it that's the one I yeah but that's the one I really have a hard time like I think I could be delusional I have a great time everywhere like I'm at funerals and I have a good time I'm at weddings I have a good time yeah yeah no but I'm met that play for 25 hours I'm having a good time sure but you if you feel obligated to do something I don't think you like it I got nervous that once you were on the group chat you were going to feel obligated to participate and also knowing you were going to get multiple texts a day from people and then feel like well I got to like engage that it would become homework yeah and it's not on you that I am stressed out about it that's on me I should not care of course like you decided to participate in this I feel that I was very clear about what it was but then then when you say like yeah who are these people I'm kind of like I I tried to make it so clear now I'm scared okay well you know what I mean yeah let's just clear all this up so like I I just didn't know not like who it wasn't who are these who are the people on the text I want to be a to address them and be a good participant I'm the new person in the group so I want to put my best foot forward so I wanted to know who it was and I'm very excited to be a part of this chain I'm not a part of any text chain I'm much older and my friends don't do text change and so it's exciting and yeah as long as I mean I I know you don't like to hear this I don't really know why you don't like to hear it because it is the truth I have codependency with you and it is real and part of it I do think has nothing to do with you it has to do with the way our relationship started uhh babysitter employer exactly like the the delineation of you being my employer at first you know like Dax doesn't like this Dax doesn't like this Dax doesn't like this like there's was there a lot of stuff well like well also it's coming from my sister who like trying to imagine things I don't like well and she's right like she crazy protective of me yes and she doesn't want an issue and like I get it you know Dax really doesn't like when the sponge you know there's I remember so specifically the sponge and like yeah that's true it really affected me Rob having a good giggle over there about that I was so hyper aware of the sponge and like so many things you know I'm a good student I know you are I know you are no one I'm not asking for sympathy I'm not the victim you're not in trouble you didn't do WR I'm saying that before I say to you my frustration in life this is a great example I as I said I went to Barton Springs with an while we were in South by yeah and we were walking down to acid Springs the water yeah and she was saying that she Lov the Molly McNerney episode yeah and um she said I have never related so much to somebody than when she was explaining how intimidated she was by you yeah and I'm like what Ang what are you talking about when were you intimidated by me because from my perspective like I have always been so nice to an and I've invited her to she's always been key hair on any movie I've made um she makes me artwork I hang it in the house like I just adore an and I've been so soft and sweet to an forever that it's hard for me to reconcile that someone's like intimidated by me when I'm being so gentle and kind you are being gentle and kind so then when I hear that like you have you often have so much fear now the thing about me getting into it with strangers makes total sense and I can own that it must be stressful to be look I know what it was like to be around my dad MH I like to think he was 5x of me but yeah everywhere we went I was like is he going to fight at Costco is he going to fight on the side of the road is he going to fight at the gas station so that I totally get and and I can see it clearly like of course that must be so stressful my kids will let me know like I we feel you're trying to drive faster than that person I am and that and that's exhausting but the me being unhappier inconvenience that one I just have a hard time connecting as I have a hard time connecting with an thinking I'm intimidating right well again I think it you being the employer I I have this with Kristen I still have it with her I am constantly and again this is not her it's me like if we're on a girl's chat or something or if I like I'm like I'm planning dinner or something with the girls or we've like said like let's hang out this week in my head I do this I'm like okay well Kristen can't come because she's working and I know she works this day and she works this day so I'm definitely not going to include her on this chat cuz she would hate being included on a chat for no reason like I know this about her from working with her and I'm still always going to be in that mode and I don't do that to any of the girls even if I know that they can't because I don't have that experience of constantly trying to make her life easy you kind of formatted your brain that way for years and you're in there in some way as well well that some of my suspicion is that some of it did get grafted onto me because where Kristen and I are different neither of these are good or bad she has an appetite for a much busier life than I do like she has many many many more projects going at once I have a very hard time functioning with that level I kind of need to focus on just a few things that's just how my brain works she can somehow juggle 300 balls so when you're working with her yes for that kind of an approach to life to work everything has to be insanely efficient and extraneous stuff needs to be weeded out yes but I don't really operate that way I kind of keep my life kind of small on the smaller side yeah and I've don't I've never had an assistant and I don't really want it to be big enough where I need help so but I do think some of that got grafted onto me when I actually don't have that disposition all that much you think I'm delusional or um I don't think you're delusional and I think you guys are different um I do think though like it happens all the time when I'm talking to people for the show and stuff I'm not looping you in for no reason I could right but why would I do that I'm going to handle it I'm just going to handle it yeah that's my disposition I'm much more like right I want efficiency efficiency first and foremost I want things back to back I want to knock it out I want I'm like her oh let me add though I do appreciate how much stuff disappears that you make disappear that I don't even know about so it's like I haven't even I haven't requested that that's not really my disposition but I also enjoy the fact that there are a bunch of little things that I don't even know I don't even want to call them little there are a bunch of things I don't know about and I do enjoy that it's practiced like that if you're a good I mean maybe this is like a um yeah that's the job is to handle [ __ ] and for an assistant and I think it can get very tricky for assistance yeah I would want to I would want the person to know everything they did for them it's so hard because everything's just happening seamlessly and flawlessly as it should and that's the job is to go unnoticed and have everything in its right spot and done when it's done and and um I couldn't do it it's really hard I'd have to tell you all the things I did for you I know and and you have to be okay knowing they're just not going to know a lot of the stuff until you leave well and you have to have but well also you they're pissed you have to have the confidence and faith that they do recognize that and appreciate it some people do and don't don't and that would be so hard thank God I mean Kristen does and that's very helpful you know she's great about that I presume so because she's regularly telling me how much she appreciates that this thing got handled and she didn't even know about like she gets she's aware of it and she'll often tell me how grateful she is that Anna's just three steps ahead and it doesn't she doesn't even know what happened or she finds out it was the you know when I trained her quot or whatever that was that's the main thing to impart you are to try to include her in as little as possible right that's not necessarily some I mean she she did make clear she liked that but she wasn't like I don't want to know anything make sure I don't know anything like she never said that it's just became you can see and I can see so her one of her shortcomings which she would admit to is and this has changed over the years but she has a very hard time saying no so she says yes a lot and then so as two people who care about her I think if you're around her a lot you do get to see her become overwhelmed enough yeah frequently enough that that you start wanting to protect her from herself yes that's what I kind that's my also my role I think that's right I think I with her and with you because it's much more than just a professional relationship right I mean I'm so grateful for the way it's all gone so it it has worked out obviously but when I say codependence I need to protect my mom I don't want her to be upset I'm going to take care of all stuff so she's never upset similarly most bosses don't send an email to a neighbor in defense of their employee well at this point that yeah yeah goes two ways right I'm not trying to yeah anyway hold on hold on what happened I'm relating to you I'm saying yes I do the same for you I do things for you that is not a employer employee relationship regularly so I'm caught in the same Meer as you yeah what's wrong with that nothing nothing I was just thrown a little I mean because I'm not really talking about present day because I think present day is so different I mean I know technically you're my employer but it's like hard for me sometimes for me to like know that I mean we've yeah grown into such a partnership yeah yeah yeah I was only pointing out that if you were just someone I worked with and I found out they were being hassled by their neighbor I probably wouldn't get involved can I yes you would cuz you you have you did it with Peggy like you do you protect people right no no I there well there's many I don't if if Rob was at war with his neighbor I wouldn't get involved but you're connected to this yes yes but if your current if your current landlord was being a bully to you I would get involved yeah I mean I thought you were actively not getting involved before before until or I was being begged by both you and Kristen to not get involved for sure but I've been trying to retaliate for three years yeah I didn't I guess I didn't to be I guess I didn't really know that was so much about me but it's nice that it was of course it is well there was no real major grievances that I had personally well this was but that's like did you the the LA list I wrote that's like a throwaway at the end the primary offense is you yeah I mean yeah all to say the relationships are uh multifaceted yeah they're so deep and okay back to the connections chain though right oh yeah okay yeah so all I'm saying is I I am programmed and I've also worked on it like I work on it cuz I don't think it's healthy for me or you or her I'm not inquiring to challenge you or or defeat you or prove that you're wrong I'm I'm not even challenging I'm really trying to get specifics because I don't like stressing people out I do feel responsible and guilty about the fact that I am aggressive towards other men sometimes in public and the people around me have to deal with that and I always want to apologize when I do that I want to own when I do it I want to try to do better so I need to know the other things or I can't really improve on them because but it's not for you it's not your job it's my job it's my job to think okay he asked to be on this I don't need to think 14 steps ahead of like well he's going to get texts every single day and he might not like those texts every sing like he might get annoyed that it's like going off and then he might feel like he has to respond and I don't need to do that that's my issue that might be your ISM yeah mine's aggression that's my ISM this is worrying but I'm just want to alleviate you like I'm so excited to have new friends on this text change and have this dumb game to um text about every day accused one of the participants toat to cheating I know I don't know why you did that I don't even know who you were talking Robbie yeah cuz he posted his and then I I replied specifically to his I said I'm too new to the group to say this but I smell a cheat he is not a cheat and um I'm sure he's not but I thought he was really cheating I wouldn't be accusing him of it but okay I'm going to teach you about reading these yeah so Callie that was Tuesday let's look at today well let's also talk yesterday I [ __ ] you [ __ ] the bed I was so embarrassed to send my results to the chain can I I was so proud of you for sending that oh good I really really really was you did you it wasn't your best show ter I did ter whatever I only had one if I made one more mistake I would have failed right and this is going to be a good game to teach me about pausing on my decisiveness cuz I'm so decisive exactly I usually make the mistakes the first couple CU I'm so cuz you're just moving so quick I got this boom yeah I want to get to the hard ones yeah so yeah you you made a bunch of mistakes you sent it to the chat and I think that was another thing I was like oh my God if he doesn't get one he's going to be upset and then he's going to feel like he has to send it and then he's going to feel like I don't want to trigger him feeling like stupid cuz he's not and then am I gonna have to tell everyone like guys just reminding you Dax is smart like uh got an anthropology degree yeah manl what if I started like just like liberal arts education Gates elic studies yeah um but yesterday Robbie got got them perfect and then Max got them perfect no mistakes and I made one mistake did you see that yeah yeah so you could see did but could you tell I only got one wrong yeah okay I can I wanted to make sure you could tell it was only one wrong yep um you're just you're just screenshotting the color blocks you you send share results and it show like like word used to um okay so I made one mistake and then you made some but then you said I made a lot well the most you can make but you still got it though it's not the most you can make you can make so many that you don't get it I didn't faou yeah you yeah and so you said deeply ashamed to share this and I almost cried oh you did and he said if I don't do better tomorrow I promise to leave the group and oh my God I like it's too it's a little too much for me I think all you know Monica I'm doing very good with the stupid thing I feel totally smart enough to be in this group yeah you are I do I do I I think that that insecurity certainly has diminished greatly I've made a lot a lot of progress in that I don't even feel the urge but then I thought oh no he said he's going to leave and now everyone is going to be like no oh God yeah really it wasn't that bad and like that is something by the way that is something Robin do cuz he's very I did cheat yeah honestly would not be surprised if he said that would not be surprised I would have done that bad too if I didn't cheat he's very sweet um and so he would want you to feel good cuz I said don't ever leave and then he Robbie said LOL that will not be necessary I have plenty of those like you know he's trying to make and then you said something about being a dumb Dum I don't know I just hated it and then oh no no it was a good one it was a good one I'm sorry said you said I guess being the dumb Dum could lift everyone else's Spirits maybe I'll look at it as service were yeah yeah that's funny it was funny but hurt my heart a little bit and then and then this is so very I'll maybe I need to leave the chamber your I should this is good for me if you left the chamber I know honestly that's more likely no it's good for me it's good for me um this is hysterical anywh who it's been a real journey the past couple days with connections I [ __ ] love the game yeah I love it too it's so fun Have You Been impressed by me or no I wish I like doesn't feel you're not going to like this I I don't really I don't really I don't I don't I'm not impressed if someone does good or bad I don't don't not at this thing yes cuz even like when we did puzzles with AJ you were impressed that I was getting them absolutely so absolutely I think I was very impressed you were very quick thanks I don't know if people are spending three hours on this or they do it in two seconds like I don't know if I I think if I spend an hour on it I could get it right every day sometimes I don't think I could even with an hour but anyway I've been just been doing really well um I just like impressive as a is a 1600 on the SAT like connections get it's cool not really cuz like I'll try to be more I'll try to be more impressed you don't have you don't need to be impressed I just it's like none of my dads are proud of me oh how dare you they just aren't oh really have you ever seen anyone come up to me where I don't go look at that house that's Monica's house over there I'm so proud of you it's ridiculous no I want you to be proud of my uh brain connections well I and you just mentioned a time I was celebrating your intelligence on AJ's podcast well I had to bring it up [Music] oh anyway anyways connections really great game yeah great game great game okay this is for Christina applicate oh okay great and this was wonderful I have the biggest Sim of all time oh yeah you want to tell it was while you're editing this yep I was editing this show at Cara shout out then I was walking home and I had some left cuz I didn't want to walk home in the dark you know my whole I have to get ahead of it so I and I hate editing and walking it's really hard to do so I don't do it that often yeah you you hold your laptop no I do it on my phone so there's just so much pausing and it's not fun I don't do it very often I only do it if I like really want to get something done by a Time necessity so I was walking and finishing up this edit and I was at the part where you say that she reminds you of your sister and I say oh my gosh I was just thinking that I was going to tell you after sweet Carly Carly Carly Carly you're hearing Carly yes I look up I'm on Lo Field's Boulevard and Carly is walking towards me with her dogs I you almost jumped out of your skin I freaked out and I think I scared her cuz I was like oh my God I just I'm listening to Christine app and and she looks she reminds us of you and then and then I talking like she got inundated with a lot of energy wow like she might have thought you were gacked up or something yeah and I was on the Sim yeah yeah sure it hits it was crazy being there in the moment where she just materialized yeah was bizarre okay weirdly this is a perfect ding-ding ding so I dropped the kids off at school this morning M I pulled back in the driveway and I got my connections out in the car oh I decided like oh now's a perfect time before I go in and I have to answer any questions or I'm going to just take this time in the car sure me time yeah where I could really focus and I wasn't quite finished and I could just see out of the corner of my eye Kristen was exiting in her workout clothes I'm assuming she saw me I just pulled in 5 minutes before and she walks up to the door absent mindly oh to your the car you were in yes and she grabs the driver's side door handle and then sees me so scary oh my God she screams so loud I know exactly what she would look like seeing a ghost like she it almost killed her yeah that's so scary she was like like well you've seen her when she get when she gets so scared she starts crying oh she cried she was fighting it back but yeah her eyes were immediately glazed over and it's so funny cuz I'm just like I'm so sweetly sitting in a car playing a game and to see someone get that [ __ ] freaked out there is nothing like that feeling that unexpected somebody is somewhere you didn't think there was any humans it's a funny thing to do to people what why are we so scared I mean I guess it's good it's a scary world people get have been getting murdered from beginning of time yeah I know by the way reading that brief history of intelligence that Duckworth suggested it is a fascinating book oh good it's kind of wild how late into this game we got sight and hearing and all like most of the time these organisms are just cruising around Earth in darkness and in silence nut responding to whatever they bumped into yeah it's weird oh my God I'm so glad we're seeing and hearing and tting anding again kind of weird no I know kind of weird how are we alive right now I don't get it suspicious that we live in a time with connections and Carly appearing out of nowhere right that's just something's wrong but I don't want to look too deep okay okay um now a couple facts okay she mentions a guy Josh Richmond yeah and she said everyone kind knows him he's friends with Robert Downey Jr there's a there's an article on him he's the Godfather of the LA club scene yeah I wonder I almost feel like there might be a dock about him yeah it says his clubs have defined the LA party scene yes so for me he holds this very interesting place so I used to go with Kareem to clubs we would try to go dancing and of course mind you led by him I didn't really know anything about La but he knew yeah and he somehow knew Josh cuz his boss B was friends with Josh and so occasionally we would go to these clubs and it was like we'd have to go up to Josh and yeah he's this very specific looking gentleman who has had a cane since he was in his 20s or 30s whatever age he is he was older than us but probably not much so for I don't know five years of my life he was somebody who occasion more often than not didn't let me into a place oh nor should he have I was dressed like [ __ ] and I wasn't on a TV show and that's the kind of Club it was and whatever like I have no reason to care but I knew him as a figure very clearly cuz he was the gatekeeper of these places we would try to go and so I have a complicated relationship with Josh that he doesn't even deserve but for me does symbolize the time I was on the outside of the party yeah and he's totally nice I've been around him with Downey I've been around with different people but it's hard for me to escape the 5 years of going oh there's that [ __ ] guy he's not going to let us in yeah yeah and now you've done it to people what are you talking well well we have we have done it to people I think about that sometimes like it's the reality of business but we say no to people yeah it's just the truth well we have a finite amount and a club has a finite amount of capacity listen he is the king he has promoted all these clubs for all these years and been very successful so I'm owning it's when I see him it reminds me of my insecurity yeah of course yes I know I'm not but even when she brought him up I I I don't know what my reaction was in the episode but it's so loaded for me oh wow that even hearing yeah Josh the guy with the can I'm like makes I feel insecure oh when we would get in though boy what fun it was it was so fun I do not like clubs oh I love them I really miss them what you said the other day when you were like if I never step foot in a party a club is a party already on crack a club a club for me is a dance floor like I went to clubs to dance and I love to dance and there's so many exciting people on the dance floor it's like visual Balia right going in standing in a loud place trying to converse with people and then move to another group of people and never dancing is I don't like that I see yeah all right okay the cougan account is it's 15% of gross earnings that's not a lot no that's not no um okay the lineup for Married with Children we were talking about the other shows were on that night yeah um it was 21 Jump Street [ __ ] what a show and the Tracy Alman show it was Tracy alond you know for a new network to come out of the gates think how many shows NBC ABC CBS they launch every fall yeah vast majority don't stick but 21 Jump Street was a massive hit that ran and so it launched John John Depp I know huh and then cool Married with Children and Tracy Al show was great and they launched The Simpsons yeah I guess when it started the first week it was just married with children in the Tracy almond show then the next week it was the three shows oh wow okay and Kelly was hot yeah sure I mean come on if you're a teenage boy like you had Melissa Milano on who who's the boss MH you know you just had a handful of people your age that you could see on TV Blossom no she was a little past me mayic right that was my sister love Blossom oh yeah I love Blossom yeah but for me it was basically Alysa Milano and Applegate well or what's her name from Bewitched uh Samantha yeah it does before me but yeah Elizabeth something her name Montgomery Elizabeth Montgomery oh okay yeah I guess well you know what one got made me feel weird as a kid was um I dream of Jean cuz she was kind of sexy she was sexy yeah yeah and I was like eight yeah and like this woman is in a weird outfit and she's like her belly's out yeah it was very provocative the other show that made me feel crazy was Benny Hill which came on very late at night if I was up really late on a weekend night was it black and white like and and it was like fast they would do fast motion and like Benny would be chasing a woman around the backyard and like women were often in bra and underwear oh my God yeah it an English show well there was like women in lingerie on it all the time supped to be sexy it was a comedy show Benny Hill show but there was often women in in negl and stuff but it was it in black and white I think it was in color but does that song ring a bell though that's the Benny Hill theme song yeah wow um wow so much to learn okay the show was called not The Cosby's originally um she said not The Cosby Show but okay not the Cosby really close very very close that would just be one wrong on connections exactly Icarus Icarus has come up a few times we like that one now I think people are very familiar with the term flu too close to the Sun but I don't know if they know it comes from icus exactly why did Icarus fly so close to the Sun as they were approaching the island of Samos Icarus turned arrogant he felt an unconquerable urge to fly towards heaven as close to the Sun as he could ignoring his father's warnings he flew higher and higher until the wax that held the wings together melted and he began falling at speed oh no Icarus I know don't get too cocky recklessness I'm going to fly directly into the Sun and blow it up yeah he drowned he drowned oh we lost him so he was killed by his arrogance that would also then be hubris exactly another another helenic studies liberal arts education and Achilles heel in some ways that's a little different I think he's more like a sympathetic character right yeah it is more sympathetic it's like that's his soft spot basically yeah he was like Invincible but I know but when I think about Achilles heel in modern day I think of it as a personality component like the part of you that is the part take you down yeah POS colonic studies um let's see here okay she said she had read something about how children's DNA get sort of implanted in the mother's brain yeah I think she's thinking of the epigenome it passes on right well there's an article in science news.org uhhuh with a very cute baby picture and um it it says in here fetal cells are probably sprinkled throughout a mother's brain a study of women who had died in their 70s found that over half of the women had mailed DNA a snippet from the Y chromosome in their brains presumably from when they were in the womb scientists often look for male DNA and women because it's easier than distinguishing A daughter's DNA from her mother's if DNA from daughters were included the number of women with children's cells in their brains would probably be higher ding ding ding if you look at your text from me I have forwarded you an article that Kristen forwarded me yesterday that is so fascinating and it's a ding-ding ding to No Holly it's an Atlantic article about now that we have such comprehensive DNA testing in a database the prev vence of incest is the real rate of it is kind of becoming known and it's so much higher than previously assumed really yeah and remember Noah Holly was saying his mother had written about it extensively and they were saying it was like a one in a million occurrence and this article quotes that as that having been the previous assumption but now there's a database that says it's one in 7,000 but it's worse than that because that's incest that resulted in a pregnancy that didn't miscarry not an abortion actually was delivered what so if you work backwards the numbers the incident rate is way way higher than that the article about like a guy that he had been adopted and he had known the story that the the family had come in 14-year-old girl had the baby and then they all fled and they had given fake names at the hospital and then he came to learn through DNA testing because he wanted to find his mom that they call it I forget the term I got to memorize it it was a really good term it was like homogeneity of something there's a too long of a section of your DNA that is suspicious so they can they can pretty much tell and um through tons of Investigation he he was the result and he didn't know forever if it was the father and the 14-year-old girl or the older brother and he discovered it was the older brother yeah she doesn't know them right well he has tried to get in touch and then he started this community and there's now a large community in this Facebook group of all of people who have discovered this and the amount of shame that they have and they feel defective and then you know we've been raised on incest results recessive genes materializing all the stuff and they were basically saying that that is true but it's a very low incident rate actually like our fear of having some kind of recessive monster it's like one in a 100 it's not as bad but that feeling you're like this recessive monster and that you're the product of something terrible and it's it's a great article it makes you realize like this group I of course was seeing the parallel it's like this group is first names only uhuh and I was like oh yeah it's just like alcoholism in the 30s W and so yeah it's taboo it makes you people uncomfortable to talk about but also I feel like we're aiding in that Shame by not I know in the same way that like we should just talk about addiction and we should talk about all these things and eating disorders and all this stuff and people should just feel fine about the hand they were de I agree but also to be first one up or like be these token symbols it also sucks it's like I to take one for the team here am I willing to do that and I I understand if the answer is no wow okay I found a New Yorker about ly Mish her lyrics but now it's like not I'm trying to sign in yeah and it's not letting me sign in um I'm going to try a different one but I wanted it to be the New Yorker cuz rapable but very interested I guess not okay we're going to have to go with Hollywood Reporter it's um a little bit different but a little bit different okay common miss her lyrics in sync it's going to be me people think it's going to be May oh I don't even know what's on you sing it no I won't sing it um okay do you want to sing it Rob no uh okay Dancing Queen AA Feel The Beat on the Tangerine but the correct lyric tambourine Feel The Beat on the tambourine yeah yeah t that's the easy mistake okay Starship We Built This City we built this city on rock and roll this article we built the city on sausage rolls no no one's ever heard that no one said that no okay also oh my God okay this this is the Beatles I Want to Hold Your Hand some people think it's I want to hold your ham I want to hold your ham I want to hold your ham I do want to hold everyone the same one from the New Yorker I found Artic yeah oh wow was this like a national poll resulted in this the ham people really think that come on they think I want to hold your ham I do want to hold people H sausage rolls is on there too what okay and then the next one is Bon jooby Living on a Prayer it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not is the real lyric uh I guess some people think it doesn't make a difference if we're naked or not oh well it would make a big difference if we were naked yeah that would be a lie and John bonjovi doesn't lie slj Joy I know love him remember we interviewed John Joy I know yeah John John okay my heart will go on what is that song Hold that one song Titanic the big song in Titanic SEL oh SEL selion the line I believe that the heart does go on is sometimes replaced with I believe that the hot dogs go on no this is interesting though because this happened this morning eron and I were arguing about the lyrics for diarrhea diarrhea so we're making posters for Tiger's opening day for Ted Seager for tigers's opening yeah Tigers opening day of baseball oh in Detroit which is virtually an estate holiday opening day huge day kind of symbolizes spring oh is it that way in Chicago too like opening day is like it's almost like Summer's around the corner it's a huge day fun so we made these different posters and I wrote different taglines but Aaron had written when you're rounding first and you feel an insatiable thirst Ted seis Ted seis oh cute and I said I think it's sliding into first yeah that's how I know it I think that's how everyone knows it this is so rare that when you're rounding first to it doesn't sound right no that's just because he knows baseball so well and then he tried to tell me people don't slide into first and I was like I don't play baseball but I know people slide first well you're not supposed you're told not to but people do I see it all the time I watch very few the only base you can run through so your momentum is actually better to keep trying to run but people do sled into first yeah okay all this it's because he knows baseball so well that inside baseball this is the first time it's literal oh my God he's too inside baseball baseball that he can't see that people took Liberties yes when you're rounding past first and you feel that insatiable thirst Ted SE fun yeah but it should be sliding into first right I guess I don't have skin in the game there I both are funny and makes sense to me um do you want to think of diarrhea right before you order a beer though well no if you're if I'm being honest no I don't but I thought that was a nonn I thought you guys are definitely using no no no no we're picking like we're not going to make five posters U so I was like I love it it's really funny but I don't want anyone to think about diarrhea because beard does cause diarrhea guys like diarrhea and it's probably targeted Mor at men right do they oh my God guys like diarrhea they like a diarrhea joke sure sure sure I just don't know if they want get thirsty for something I don't know I I just like let's just keep it away from diarrhea even though I like it yeah then I made up some new lyrics once we were fighting about it you want to hear them okay when you're [ __ ] in your pants and it makes you dance diarhea oh that's good that's nice right we need some new lyrics here's another one when you hear a big old th you sprayed your shorts with mud haest Reus the only um logic poke in the thud one yeah is if it's spraying you're not getting the thud I know I just tried to rhyme something with mud I know but I think you would mud and thud is right it's just the spraying part oh right okay when you fill your shorts blast your shorts with mud last yeah that would thought yeah anyways get some Ted seagers Ted seer.cancer.gov entire life you know you have some do you have favorites yeah yeah what are a couple of yours no you tell me yours well I went with Aaron and Brian Bolis and we went down to Tiger's opening day and we were 19 Bolis had a fake ID and we got these um 64 o jugs of Colt 45 two zigzags what's that it's a song oh it is Afroman yeah oh guys you're so young I want to be on that text chain about whatever lyrics that is but yeah we each had a couple 64 oers so 128 o a Colt 45 we didn't we tried to go into the game we couldn't we hung in the parking lot we just had the it was the perfect sunny day everyone was excited about opening day that's fun these malt Liquors tasted so good it was the perfect Buzz that's a highlight memory that's good yeah and I was 19 I was like I like this I like getting drunk in a parking lot I mean yeah tailgating definitely is up there for me as far as just life memory it's as good as it gets yeah you're Outdoors [ __ ] the spirit yeah it's really special Robbie never was it never your thing huh I didn't drink till I turned 21 oh wow such a good boy no I I had a beer in Canada two weeks before my 21st birthday cuz it was Canada yeah 19 oh yeah well I was 20 but I was allowed to I'm just saying that yeah the age is 19 did you like the T no I don't even I didn't even finish it yeah the I remember the first time I tried beer and it was so disgusting yeah I could not believe people would drink it oh I liked it immediately I hated it but then I grew to like it it's delicious I grew to like it too beer snobby yeah you like you got you got into the hole okay now um how long have we been at this I don't know hour 10 oh God okay God um that's it convincing all right so we got to go love you love you [Music]